


After The Flood

by lovemyway (vesper93)



Category: Call Me By Your Name (2017), Call Me By Your Name - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Bisexual, Bisexuality, Cheating, Comfort, Coming of Age, Drugs, Family, Family Drama, Hate, Heartbreak, Hurt, Light Angst, Love, Lust, M/M, Multi, New York, Oral Sex, Perlmans being rockstars, Politics, Raw Sex, Recreational Drug Use, Reunion, Rough Sex, Sequel, Sex, Warning: Homophobic Language (Some), Warning: Mild Violence, Warning: Racism (some), european, fight, identity politics, safe sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-02
Updated: 2018-10-11
Packaged: 2019-06-01 12:28:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 30
Words: 103,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15143108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vesper93/pseuds/lovemyway
Summary: A year older, a year further away, a year more grown up. That's what Elio thinks. He's learnt in that year about sex and love. So why should going to Columbia effect him in any way? He's going there because of the excellent programme for his subject. He's absolutely not going because of an early-career academic who just happened to work there.So we all know there's going to be a sequel to Call Me By Your Name (film). This is my take on what happens when Elio goes to University in New York City. Obviously not canon to the book, as the film isn't going to be either!





	1. Swimming Alone

One

Elio stood amongst the mismatched suitcases at the bottom of the stairs. He’d just hauled them down from his bedroom, and in this expansive space they looked so small, and so meagre. This was it; his life packed away into a few cases, this is all he would have to sustain him until he came home for the winter break, whilst everyone else was celebrating Christmas. Elio’s hand quickly went to his neck, just to check he hadn’t left behind his star of David, and was relieved to find that it was there. 

‘ _as-tu tout mis dans ta valise?_ ’ his mother came up behind him, holding his passport and tickets, asking whether he had everything. She kissed him on the cheek, almost as an afterthought. 

‘I hope so,’ said Elio in English, ‘Although I won’t know until I don’t have something I don’t need’ 

‘ _Insolente_ ’ came Malfada’s reproach from the kitchen behind his mother, although it just made both of them smile. 

‘Alright, well your father is bringing the car around,’ said his mom, ‘You’ll be going just you two; we can’t all fit in the car with your cases as well.’ 

‘ _Devo portarli fuori?_ ’ came Anchise’s voice from the doorway, asking whether Elio was ready, and motioning to the cases. 

‘ _Si_ ’ said Elio, picking up one of the cases, and letting Anchise grab the other two. The leather of the handle that Elio was carrying stretched slightly with the weight of the contents, and gave a slight creak in protest. He picked up his rucksack and slung it over one shoulder; knowing that he would be dumping it in the car in a few moments. 

He walked out of the stone doorway, and to the front porch, where his dad was just bringing the car around, spitting up a few pieces of gravel on the way. It was still very hot outside, and Elio could already feel the few curls at the back of his neck beginning to stick to his damp skin. His dad parked up and got out, whilst Anchise opened the boot. Only one of the suitcases would fit in there, so the other two had to slid haphazardly onto the backseat; hence the reason there was only the reason for the two of them to head to the airport. 

‘Alright,’ said his mom, handing him his passport and the tickets, which Elio slid inside his backpack. His mom pulled him into a tight embrace; he could smell her white jasmine perfume in her hair. He hugged her back tightly. Eventually she stepped back and took a drag of the lit cigarette that had been slowly puttering between her manicured fingernails. 

Elio waved at Malfalda, who almost rolled her eyes before coming up and drawing him into a short hug. He smiled into her shoulder; he should of known she wouldn't let him go with just a wave. Anchise didn’t hug him, but did with a clap on the shoulder, which Elio took to mean just as much. 

‘Come on then,’ said his dad, ‘Let’s go’

Elio nodded, taking a look up at the house, his eyes flickering over the windows of his bedroom; the one that was his, and the one that was his for six weeks during the summer, separated by the balcony, with the green doors that banged slightly. He worried his bottom lip for about half a second, before turning away and getting in the passenger seat of the car. 

His dad started up the engine, and they trundled away from the house, a little bit of dust in their path. Elio turned in his seat to look back at the trio standing in the doorway; he waved. Malfalda disappeared a moment later to return to the kitchen where she’d just begun to cook dinner. Elio knew that his mother was expecting guests – some ladies from the local bridge club. His dad wouldn’t be back from the airport in time to join them, so Malfalda would just leave him some dinner in the fridge for when he returned. 

‘Ready?’ asked his father, and Elio knew that he wasn’t just talking about his things. 

‘Yeah,’ said Elio, settling into the seat, with the seams that were slightly fraying, ‘I think so’

‘What are you going to do when you get there?’ asked his dad after a moment. 

‘Find where I’m staying,’ said Elio evasively, ‘I mean, New York is a big place’ 

‘That it is,’ he said, ‘You have the address?’ 

‘Yeah West 122nd Street’ said Elio; he’d memorised it weeks earlier when his mother had told him, ‘It’s part of a block students live in, so once I get to the street, it shouldn’t be too difficult to find.’ 

His dad smiled. Elio took that moment to look out at the country lane they were driving down, and to open his window so that the breeze blew through his hair. A cyclist passed him in the opposite direction, but he couldn’t tell who it was, or whether he knew them. 

‘And are you nervous?’ his dad asked, breaking the silence after a minute or two. 

‘Not really,’ said Elio, ‘Should I be?’ 

‘Well you’ve decided not to do music…’ his dad tailed off. 

‘Yeah well, you know why,’ said Elio. 

‘Yes I do,’ said his dad, ‘English and European Lit will be tough however’ 

‘Well I didn’t think to go to university for it to be easy,’ said Elio teasingly, knowing that his dad wouldn’t take offence from it. 

‘And about other things..?’ his father just left the sentence hanging in mid-air, not collecting it again until Elio would speak. 

Elio shrugged, ‘Columbia’s a big place. New York even bigger. There’s a lot of people to meet and places to go. The likelihood of me meeting one person, who doesn’t even teach my subject, is probably minimal.’ 

‘Uh-huh,’ said his dad, not commenting one way or another on this statement. 

Elio didn’t really want to talk about it. This was not why he’d chosen to Columbia over Brown, or Yale, or Harvard. It was because they had one of the best humanities faculties in the world, with professors he admired in his subject. It definitely had nothing to do with an early-career academic who also happened to work there. Elio was sure of that. 

**

Elio leaned forward to gaze out of the small plane window, the wire of his headphones getting caught under his ear as he did so. He could see the sprawling lights of New York City, disappearing off into the distance like a giant spiderweb caught under fog. It was raining. He could see the droplets rolling down the thick Perspex. This surprised him a bit; he’d heard the New York was horribly hot in the summer – but then he figured, so is Italy at times, it doesn’t mean that it can’t rain. 

Getting through the airport was surprisingly easy, and then he found himself on the street in front of JFK. He knew that there was probably a bus that would take him into the city, but he felt safer taking a taxi when he had this amount of luggage. It was also coming up towards ten at night – he knew that the city buses in New York City were probably nothing like the sleepy town buses he was used to in Italy and France, where the most threatening person you’d meet would be a senora whose regular seat you’d accidently sat in. Either way, he got in one of the nearest yellow cabs, after putting his luggage in the boot and telling the driver where he was going. 

‘First time in town?’ said the driver in a thick accent that Elio would come to learn was from New Jersey. 

‘ _Si,_ ’ said Elio, and then blushed, ‘Um, yes,’ 

‘Student?’ asked the driver. 

‘Yeah, Columbia,’ said Elio, looking out of the window, half wishing the man would stop talking to him so he could look at the city racing by. The man whistled through his teeth at the name of the school. 

‘Had a few students trickle in for there over the past week,’ said the driver, ‘When does term start?’

‘Next week,’ said Elio with a shrug, a distinctly European gesture. The driver seemed to get the hint and turned up the radio. Billy Idol’s ‘White Wedding’ was playing, and Elio caught on to the line, ‘It’s a nice day to start again’ – yes, he agreed silently, it was. 

**

The driver stopped in front of some typical-looking New York apartment buildings. They were looking a bit run down, with the coloured paint peeling off the front in places. The iron railings of the fire escape trailed down the front of the building, with some flower baskets attached in strategic places to make it look slightly prettier. Lights were on in some of the windows. He paid the driver and thanked him, before turning back to the apartment buildings. He was looking for flat 24. He quickly discovered that the row was divided into blocks of four flats, and he just happened to be at the wrong end. He dragged his suitcases with difficulty to the apartment building that denoted the block contained Flat 21-24. 

He’d been instructed to ring the bell and someone would let him in. He looked up at the windows, hoping that someone would have heard. As if in answer to his look, a window opened a few stories up and a girl with curly blonde hair appeared outside of the frame. 

‘Elio?’ she asked down at him. Elio immediately noticed the British accent she had; so his name came out Uh-lee-o. 

‘Yeah’ he said.

‘Hold on, I’ll be right down,’ she said, and then disappeared from sight. A few moments later Elio heard a clattering down the stairs on the inside and then a lock and a chain being slid back. The girl came into sight as she opened the door. She was wearing pyjama shorts and a ratty t-shirt. She was clearly ready for bed, and had been waiting for him. 

‘Hey,’ she said, ‘We’ve been expecting you. I’m Zoe.’ 

She stuck her hand out for Elio to shake. He had to drop one of his suitcases to take it, and she shook it firmly. Elio was slightly surprised by the strength of her grip. 

‘Let me help you with those,’ she said, ‘Our flat is on the second floor – so it’s a bit of hike.’ 

Elio nodded, taken aback by the level of her confidence. She grabbed one of the suitcases, letting him grab the two others. She motioned him ahead of her, and she kicked the door shut behind them, letting it rattle in the frame. 

Zoe directed him up two flights of stairs, and motioned him off to the left; she had to put the case down in order to open the door in front of her with a key that had been in her pocket. 

‘Your room is this one’ said Zoe, motioning to the right of the corridor, ‘You were the last one we were waiting for’ 

Elio nodded, ‘How many others live in this flat?’ 

‘Another three,’ said Zoe, ‘Kitchen is down the hall on the left, and bathroom is at the end – try and get in there in the morning before Alana, she spends about an hour in there washing her hair,’ 

Elio smiled, ‘I’ll make a note of it,’ 

Zoe put his case down at the foot of his bed, ‘Alright, well this is you’ 

‘Thanks,’ said Elio, flicking on the overhead light. 

‘I’ll just put your key over here,’ said Zoe, dropping something metal onto his desk, ‘You’ll need the gold one for the front door and then the silver one for the flat door,’ 

‘Gold one for the front, silver for the flat,’ Elio repeated, looking around. The carpet was an off-white colour, and the walls much the same. There was a corkboard on the one of the walls, with a notice pinned on it regarding the first week and what to do. 

‘Well, I guess I’ll leave you to it,’ she said, ‘I’m betting your knackered.’ 

Before she’d said that Elio hadn’t really been aware of his own tiredness; but all of sudden it seemed to come back to him full force. His eyes suddenly felt heavy and sleepy. 

‘Yeah, I guess I am,’ he said with a smile, ‘It’s about four o clock in the morning in Italy, so I’m a little out of it.’

‘Alright, well I’ll see you tomorrow,’ said Zoe and then glanced at her watch, ‘Or rather, later today’ 

Elio smiled, and Zoe left him alone in his room. He walked over to the window and opened it; letting the sounds of the city in. It would probably take some getting used to, seeing as the noise normally heard at night was the cicadas, and the occasional bird in the sultry night air. He could hear a siren in the distance. 

He turned to his bed; someone had thoughtfully made it up for him, with the plain white bedclothes that he had seen a spare set of on top of his wardrobe. He’d have to thank Zoe in the morning, or find out who had done it. It looked so inviting. He didn’t even think about unpacking any further, he just toed off his shoes, turned off the light and fell face first into the pillows. 

His mind briefly flitted to a similar scenario when someone had done the journey the other way, and acted in a similar manner. He pushed the thought firmly out of his head, and sleep was upon him a few moments later.


	2. Water, Water Everywhere

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much to ditdut and NmaClaren, who were the first to provide feedback on this!

Elio awoke the next morning to a bright light streaming through the window. In his tiredness last night, he’d forgotten to close the curtains, and the morning light was flooding his room. He looked at his watch, that he’d not removed from his wrist in his haste to get into bed. It told him it was approaching nine. He’d slept for a good eight and a half hours, and judging by the position he’d woken in – barely without moving. 

He sat up slowly and rubbed his eyes, before swinging his legs off the bed and putting his feet on the floor. He looked at his suitcase, and tried to remember which one he’d put his towels and toiletries in. He put one onto its side and unzipped it. Well it wasn’t that one. He moved to the one standing next to it and did the same, striking lucky as a towel and a bag full of his shampoos and other things came into view. He didn’t know the etiquette in the flat when it came to the bathroom – did everyone put their stuff in there? Or did they leave it in their rooms and only take what they needed at the time? Well there was only one way to find out. He grabbed a change of clothes out of the first suitcase, and headed out of his room, towel and bag in hand. 

He could hear voices in the kitchen, and then nearly collided with one of the owners of those voices as they came out of the kitchen backwards, still talking to whoever else was in there. 

‘Whoa!’ said the guy, turning around and stopping himself from spilling tea all over the carpet as he stopped up short in front of Elio, ‘Sorry, didn’t see you’ 

‘It’s alright,’ said Elio with a shrug. 

‘You must be Elio, right?’ asked the stranger, ‘Zoe said we were waiting for you’ 

‘Uh, yeah,’ Elio said, ‘I arrived last night’ 

‘Well I’m Teddy,’ he said, ‘I would shake your hand but I see you’ve got your hands full’ 

Elio smiled in response, ‘Hi’ 

‘See you took Zo-zo’s advice about getting in the bathroom before Alana,’ said Teddy, as _‘Don’t call me Zo-zo’_ flew out of the kitchen door from a disembodied Zoe. Teddy took it in his stride and continued, ‘She’s not usually up for a bit yet. She’s only been here about a week and we already know that she takes ages in the shower.’ 

Elio chuckled lightly, before Teddy clapped him on the shoulder, reminiscent of the way Anchise did the day before. Teddy’s hand was heavier than Anchise’s had been. 

‘Well I’ll see you around,’ said Teddy, ‘If you need someone to show you about later, I’ll give you a tour and drag zazu along.’ 

A noise like an angry cat came out of the kitchen, but once again Teddy ignored it, and just grinned, before stepping out of Elio’s way and letting him continue on to the bathroom. Elio made it up the corridor, stepped inside and shut the door. He felt slightly out of breath; there were a lot of new people about and the confidence they all seemed to display took him aback slightly. He wondered if everyone he was going to meet would be so sure of themselves. He wondered if he could find some similar sense of confidence whilst he was here. 

He looked around the bathroom and immediately saw that it was a jumble of bottles, toothpaste and brushes; a hairbrush, and something that looked like blusher, lying beside the sink. Well, that answered his earlier question.   
He showered quickly, brushed his teeth, and after towelling off, pulled on his clean clothes. He instantly felt better; less sleepy, and less grimy, having washed any residue airplane muck off himself. He quickly carried his things back to his room, and put them away, before heading back to the kitchen.

Despite him having showered in the meantime, Zoe was still in there, sitting at a fairly large kitchen table, her feet on another of the seats. She was reading that morning’s newspaper, a cup of coffee near her arm. 

‘Hi’ she said, smiling at him when he appeared in the doorway, turning down the corner of her paper to look at him, ‘You alright this morning? Didn’t hear anything from your room after I left you. You must have been out like a light.’ 

‘Yeah, I was pretty tired,’ said Elio with a shrug, ‘Feel better now though.’ 

‘Breakfast?’ she asked brightly, her curly hair seeming to bounce with the sprightliness of her question. 

‘Uh, I don’t have any food yet,’ said Elio, ‘I was hoping you could show me where the nearest store is.’ 

‘Sure I will,’ said Zoe, ‘But you can nab some of mine first – I don’t mind; it’s your first day.’ 

‘Uh, thanks,’ said Elio, still standing in the doorway with his hands in his pockets. 

‘Orange juice in the fridge; fruit over there; I’ve also got some cereal or bread if you want toast.’ 

Elio paused, ‘I’ll just have some fruit and a drink, thanks,’ 

‘No worries,’ said Zoe with a smile, and flicked up her paper again. This left Elio to hunt for the glasses; which he found in a cupboard above the sink, and a knife for the fruit, which he found on the drying board. He sat down when he’d got what he needed, and started to peel an apple with the knife, stopping the blade with the edge of his thumb as he carved down through the skin. 

‘I can never do that,’ Zoe mused, and Elio blushed as he realised she was watching him again, ‘I would definitely cut myself’ 

‘It’s okay,’ said Elio, ‘You’ve just not got to do it too hard.’ 

Zoe made a noise of assent, watching his hands. 

‘So you’re from Italy, right?’ said Zoe, as Elio began the same peeling ministrations on a nectarine. 

‘Yes,’ said Elio, ‘My mom’s Italian-German, although she lived in France for most of her early life, and my father is American.’ 

‘Ah, so you’ve been over here quite a bit before then?’ said Zoe. 

Elio shook his head, ‘My dad used to teach at Berkeley, before he decided he wanted to focus more on his research and writing and moved to Europe pretty much full time.’

Zoe raised her eyebrows, ‘Very cosmopolitan’ 

Elio blushed at her comment, hiding his confusion by taking a gulp of orange juice. It didn’t taste as good as the fresh orange juice that Mafalda would make from Anchise’s oranges when they came into season in June and July, but he would have to get used to that. 

‘So do you speak, like, five languages?’ said Zoe, looking at him with interest. 

‘Not quite,’ Elio said with a small smile, ‘French, Italian and English. And a smattering of German that I’ve picked up from my mom. Although she only tends to speak German when she’s reading or if she’s angry. If she’s speaking to me in German I know I’m in trouble.’

Zoe chuckled, ‘That’s so cool.’ 

Elio shrugged, he’d never really thought of his ability to speak various languages as cool or not cool. It was just was everyone did where he had grown up. It was a complete mishmash of different cultures and nationalities that it wasn’t really surprising. 

‘I’ve had to learn the hard way,’ said Zoe, ‘I love languages. I’m studying Spanish and Portuguese here at the university, but my parents are as English as they come. My dad can probably trace his ancestors back to Alfred the Great or something.’ 

Elio laughed at her obtuse statement, ‘Whereabouts in England?’ 

‘Bath, do you know it?’ she asked. 

‘Um,’ Elio thought, wracking his brains. He’d only visited England once, and that had been when he’d been very young when his dad had been at a conference in York, ‘It’s down south somewhere?’ 

‘Yeah, south west,’ said Zoe, ‘I’ll give you points for that. I tell most people I’m from England and they say, “so what, London?”, as if that’s the only place in the country. Just London and then a desert.’ 

Elio laughed, ‘Yeah well most of the time I just tell people I’m French. It’s easier than trying to explain.’ 

‘Guess I got lucky then’ said Zoe, smiling. 

Elio smiled in returned, ‘Well, you did share your food with me.’ 

‘Alright,’ said Zoe, shutting her newspaper and putting her feet on the floor, ‘I’m going to get dressed. I’ll come back in here when I’m done and I can show you around a bit. Might see if I can drag Teddy out as well.’

‘Oh,’ said Elio, ‘I meant to ask, did you make up my bed?’ 

‘Yeah,’ said Zoe with a shrug, ‘Figured you probably wouldn’t want to do at whatever hour you were going to arrive last night.’ 

‘Well thank you,’ said Elio. 

A door slammed at the end of the corridor, and Zoe looked into the corridor, ‘Ah fuck, that’s Alana going in the bathroom. Guess I’ll have to clean my teeth in here. Lesson number two – always keep a toothbrush in your room in case you miss your window of opportunity.’ 

Elio giggled as she exited the kitchen, a decided spring in her step. She’d left her paper on the table, so he reached for it, and turned it over, his eyes scanning the front page as he ate what was left of his breakfast. 

** 

‘So, we were going to go to a flat party tonight,’ said Teddy as they walked down a side street towards what Elio hoped was a bank. He’d mentioned that he needed to go check that his account had been set up remotely. It had been a little difficult doing it over the phone from Italy, but he thought he’d probably got there in the end. He was lucky; his parents would footing all of his expenses whilst he was here. They’d not really been any discussion about it; other than that there would be a monthly limit on what would go into the checking account. 

‘In Flat 7,’ Zoe helpfully supplied, ‘Just down the row. Wanna come?’ 

‘Uh, yeah,’ said Elio, ‘Sure’ 

‘Great,’ said Teddy, ‘I think Alana will be coming too.’

‘What about the other person who lives in our flat?’ asked Elio, ‘I’ve not heard you mention them yet.’ 

‘Ah that’ll be Whitney,’ said Zoe, ‘She’s studying medicine. She started a bit before the rest of us with “easy” degrees. She barely has time to talk to us, let alone actually go out.’ 

‘She is sweet though,’ said Teddy, ‘She just never stops working.’ 

Elio shrugged slightly, ‘And she’s a freshman?’ 

‘Yeah,’ said Zoe, ‘It gets intense fast in medicine.’

‘Are you freshmen too?’ asked Elio, realising he’d never asked. 

‘Nope,’ said Teddy, gesturing to the right to make the group turn down a street, rather than continuing going straight, ‘Both sophomores. I’m studying Classics, and Zoe languages.’ 

‘He already knows what I do,’ said Zoe, rootling in her pockets, ‘I told him this morning.’

‘What are you doing?’ asked Teddy, as Zoe offered them both some gum. Elio turned it down, whereas as Teddy took a stick, unwrapped it, and started to chew. 

‘English and European Literature,’ said Elio, ‘Although I think I’ve got a couple of spaces to minor in other stuff this year. I’m not sure, I’ll have to see when I sign up for my classes.’ 

‘You probably will do,’ said Zoe, ‘Most freshers do; it’s only the really intense degrees like medicine, or law, where they don’t give you much breathing space to do anything else.’ 

‘Bank’ said Teddy, gesturing at a building just in front of them to the right, bringing them up short. 

‘Great,’ said Elio, ‘I’ll just check everything’s okay here and then can you show me where the store is?’ 

‘Deadly,’ said Teddy, sticking his gum behind his ear, to take a cigarette out of his pocket and start smoking. Elio left them in the bright sunlight to head into the bank. 

**

‘ELIOOOO! Over here!!’ Elio looked around the darkened room for the voices that had shouted his name. He spotted Teddy and Zoe in the corner, both of them smoking. Zoe was sitting on Teddy’s lap. Elio’s eyebrows rose involuntarily; that wasn’t something he had picked up on earlier. 

‘Here,’ said Zoe the second he sat down, handing him a spliff. Elio took a drag, instantly feeling his lungs opening up to the unusual taste.

‘This is Alana,’ said Teddy, gesturing to their right, to a girl with very long straight brown hair, and cute freckled face. 

‘Hey,’ she said, waving slightly, ‘Nice to meet you. These two have probably already told you all the bullshit about getting in the shower before me.’ 

‘Ha, yeah,’ said Elio taking another drag before passing it back to Zoe, ‘Your reputation precedes you,’

‘Assholes,’ said Alana to Teddy and Zoe, who just laughed, before Teddy took a drag on the spliff he was smoking and then kissed Zoe, blowing the smoke into her mouth. Elio watched with curiosity as Zoe wounded her hands into the front of Teddy’s jacket. 

‘So, are they like, together?’ he asked Alana, as Zoe and Teddy simply started making out. 

‘I don’t think so,’ said Alana with a shrug, ‘I think they just get handsy when they’re drunk.’ 

‘Do you have a girl?’ asked Zoe, when she broke away from Teddy, her lips slightly swollen. Elio blushed, although he doubted they could see it in the darkened room. 

‘No,’ he said, and when Zoe looked on expectantly, ‘We broke up.’ 

‘Ah that sucks,’ she said. 

Elio shrugged, ‘It was kind of mutual.’

That was the truth. After last summer, he and Marzia had resumed their slightly odd cobbled together relationship. His parents had approved, if it only meant that he wasn’t moping about. His mother had had a stern word with him though, just to check he wasn’t just using the girl in order not to think about anyone else. He’d assured her that Marzia knew exactly what she was doing – which was true. They’d come to a mutual decision to stop what they were doing, as Marzia was heading to the Sorbonne in a few weeks, and with Elio being over in America; it seemed kind of pointless. They’d still be friends though. You couldn’t really go through what they’d been through and not be. 

‘Elio?’ asked Zoe, snapping her fingers in front of his face. 

‘Huh?’ he asked, realising he’d zoned out. 

Zoe giggled, ‘They’re about to start playing Ring of Fire, wanna join?’ 

‘Uh, sure,’ said Elio, ‘Don’t know what the rules are though’ 

‘Just do what everyone else does – you’ll get the hang of it,’ said Teddy, ‘It’s not complicated. The aim is to pretty much to get as drunk as possible,’ 

‘Huh,’ said Elio, ‘I think I can do that’ 

Zoe giggled and grabbed him by the hand, before dragging him into a larger circle at a large table in the kitchen area of the flat. Teddy sat down on his right, Alana on his left. There was at least another ten gathered in this circle; whilst other people picked their way around the room around them. Elio looked at the set up on the table. There was a ring formed out of what looked like two packs of cards; and a pint glass in the middle of the ring. 

Elio quickly picked up the rules – each of the cards had a rule associated with them, and if you “failed” that card, or didn’t do it quick enough, then you had to take a drink. He was drinking a vodka and lime that Zoe had procured for him earlier. He wasn’t all that used to vodka; having drunk mostly wine or beer at home. It didn’t taste too bad though. 

Zoe leaned forward and picked up a card when it was her turn, ‘Five!’ 

‘Never have I Ever’ came the voice of someone nameless across the circle. Elio noticed that everyone had put their hands in the air, so he did the same. 

‘Alright,’ said Zoe, her eyes glittering with the alcohol and drugs, ‘Never Have I Ever… Spat’

Several people burst out laughing. Elio didn’t know what she meant. He looked at Alana, who mimed something explicit with her hand whilst pressing her tongue into her cheek, and then spitting out. Oh, Elio got it now – spitting after a blow job. He was thankful it was dark. He noticed that a couple of the girls folded one of their fingers down; he guessed to denote that they had spat. He kept his hand up – he figured everyone would assume that it was because he _obviously_ had never given a blow job before, when in fact it was because he’d always swallowed. 

‘Your turn to come up with one,’ said Zoe, looking at him expectantly. 

‘Uh,’ said Elio, put on the spot and at loss of what to say. He knew he had plenty of material to draw on if this was going to be all about sex; but he didn’t really feel ready to tell these people everything about himself. 

‘Uh, Never Have I Ever… passed out from drinking,’ he said, after his eyes had quickly flicked to the glass in the middle, which was slowly filling with a gross mixture of spirits, wine, and beer. Alana had told him it was called a “dirty pint” – he did not envy whoever it was who had to drink that. Elio watched as a few people, including Teddy, put a finger down, and then it was Alana’s turn to come up with a statement. He let out a sigh of relief; he had passed that test. 

**

He really didn’t feel well. His mom had always told him not to mix his drinks; but tonight he’d been drinking a mix of vodka and then beer, and then some other spirit that he’d never tasted before but involved sucking on a lime and licking some salt. It had been pretty vile if he’d been honest. He’d managed to make it out of the flat before vomiting down one of the drains in the street, his thin shoulders heaving with the effort. He pinched the bridge of his nose to try and rid the back of his throat of the vile taste. He stood up and stumbled back towards the flat at the end of the block; his bed was looking pretty inviting right now. He had no idea what time it was. 

He managed to get back up to the flat, and opened the door. He vaguely saw a girl at the end of the corridor, but he could barely think of anything else apart from getting to his bed. He fell onto the bed; much like he had done last night, expect for a totally different reason. The room was rocking like a boat on a choppy sea. 

A few moments later he was aware of someone else in the room, and he forced his eyes to open. 

‘Sit up,’ said a voice softly. He groaned into his pillow, but something in his body agreed and he managed to sit up. 

‘Take this,’ a glass was pressed into his hand, and he realised it was water. A girl was crouched in front of him, ‘Drink it – slowly. Try not to bring it up.’ 

Elio nodded, not trusting himself to speak. He sipped at the water, whilst toeing off his shoes. What seemed like a few moments later he was lying back down; except this time the girl made sure that he was on his side, and tucked several cushions behind his back, so he couldn’t roll over. He heard her say something about Jimi Hendrix, but he didn’t really catch it. He thought that he vaguely murmured something at her, but he was asleep before he could really register anything else. 

**

Elio awoke the next morning to a dry mouth and a sore head. He registered that he was on his side and wondered how he’d got all of these pillows behind his back. He sat up slowly and noticed the mostly drunk glass of water on his side table; his brain tried to scramble together the events of last night and he realised that someone had helped him when he came back to the flat. He got slowly to his feet, groaning slightly at the ache in his muscles and joints. He could only imagine was Mafalda would say if she could see him now. It would probably involve the word ‘ _stupido_ ’ in there somewhere. 

Elio stumbled out of his room and into the bathroom to take a shower. He felt better once he’d done that and washed his hair. Getting into clean clothes and brushing his teeth also made him feel distinctly more human. 

He exited the bathroom and decided to try and find the person who helped him last night. He knew the door next to his was Teddy, and the one across from the kitchen was Zoe. That left him with two options as to which one was Alana and which one was the other occupant of the house. He decided to try the one next to the bathroom, and was rewarded with a soft ‘come in!’ from the other side. He opened the door. 

The girl in the room was sitting at the desk by the window, books spread out in front of her, notes scattered every which way, including being pinned up on the walls. She turned around as he opened the door.

‘Hi,’ Elio said

‘Hi,’ she said, not getting up. Elio noticed she had a very short pixie cut hairstyle, that suited her elfin features very well, accentuating her sharp cheekbones and boyish face. She also had an accent that he’d never really heard anyone have before, but had seen some people on TV. He vaguely registered that it could be Irish. 

‘I just wanted to thank you for last night,’ he said, ‘Thanks for helping me out,’ 

‘Not to worry,’ she said with a smile, ‘You looked pretty out of it,’ 

‘I was,’ he agreed sheepishly, and then said, ‘Uh, I’m Elio’ 

‘I figured,’ she said, ‘I’m Whitney,’ 

‘Nice to meet you,’ he said, and then paused awkwardly in the door, ‘Anyway, I’ll leave you to it,’ 

He turned to go. 

‘Wait!’ came Whitney’s voice from behind him. He stopped and turned back. 

‘I’m just about to go the library,’ she said, ‘I need to renew some books. Do you want to come with me, and I can show you a bit of campus? I mean I don’t know much, but I’ve been here a few weeks.’ 

Elio smiled, ‘I’d like that.’ 

‘Alright,’ she said, ‘Just give me a minute. I’ll meet you in the kitchen.’ 

Elio nodding, considering himself dismissed. He left her room and went to find some shoes for the exploration around the campus. He was oddly excited to visit the library; he’d heard wonderful things about the university library, and was interested to see it for himself. He also grabbed his wallet whilst he was at it; he hadn’t had any food, and figured they might be able to stop at a bakery or something along the way. He headed into the kitchen and chugged another glass of water whilst he was waiting. Well; he’d managed to survive his first twenty-four hours. Just.


	3. Sink

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big thank you to ditdut and KittenPurple for their feedback on the last chapter! I would really appreciate any feedback you guys can give - it helps with writing so much. I'm updating a lot at the moment 'cause I've got some time, but I don't know whether I'll be able to keep up the one-chapter-a-day thing for the whole story. Anyway; I hope you like it! Let me know!

Elio stood in front of the huge green copper statue in the entrance hall of the library building. Whitney had disappeared to renew the books and left him in the expansive hall with arched ceilings and several statues. Elio was stood by one near the door, a Grecian soldier, by the way of his dress, holding a spear in the process of some kind of rousing oration; his free hand illustrating what he was saying. Despite it being made of copper, it was curved in a way that denoted the sculptures made of marble in the high classical period. It was a tribute to the way that the original masters had gone about their work. 

‘Pericles, I think?’ said Whitney coming back, her arms full of books. Elio gestured to her that he would take some, and she handed him a couple. 

‘ _Si,_ ’ said Elio, looking back at the statue, ‘Defender of Athenian democracy, and hero of the Peloponnesian Wars.’ 

Whitney looked up at the statue while standing at Elio’s shoulder, ‘Teddy probably knows everything there is to know about this statue; or at least the original, whatever it was copied from. He’s the one studying Classics.’

‘My dad was a Professor of Classics at Berkeley,’ said Elio, still looking up at the towering figure above them. 

‘Oh,’ said Whitney, ‘Guess you could teach Teddy a thing or two then,’ 

Elio shrugged, ‘I don’t know; it depends what he’s doing; it’s quite a big subject. Did you get everything you needed?’ 

‘Yeah,’ said Whitney, ‘Let’s go; we can go get coffee. Do you have anything this afternoon?’ 

‘Yeah, we have to go and sign up for our classes this afternoon,’ said Elio, ‘I think I’m going to go with Teddy as we’re in the same building for sign ups. Apparently Sophomores have choices too?’ 

‘I wouldn’t know,’ said Whitney with a grin as they walked out of the library, ‘I don’t get any choices at all’ 

‘Oh yeah true,’ said Elio, ‘I forgot about that. Do you know where we’re going?’ 

‘Yeah it’s just over here,’ said Whitney, ‘I go here with some of the guys from my medicine classes after our lectures.’

‘Hey, thank you for doing this,’ said Elio, shifting the books further into his arms as they walked. 

‘It’s okay,’ said Whitney with a shrug, ‘You seem kind of sweet.’ 

Elio didn’t really know what to say to that and blushed slightly. He searched for something to say that would fill his awkwardness. He moved out the way of a guy on a skateboard as he came hurtling in the other direction. 

‘Sorry, I meant to ask… your accent -?’ 

‘Irish,’ said Whitney, ‘Dublin born and bred’ 

‘I thought it might be,’ said Elio, ‘But I’d only ever heard an Irish accent on TV before – so I wasn’t sure.’ 

‘Ha, that’s cute,’ said Whitney. Elio was slightly taken aback by this statement – what did she mean by that? 

‘Alright, here we go,’ said Whitney, motioning to a corner café a few metres ahead. Elio held the door for her and they stepped inside. It was cool, compared to the heat that was beginning to build as the morning went on. 

Elio stepped up the counter, looking at the options on the board behind the baristas head. There seemed to be so many; in most places in Italy it was just coffee or not. 

‘Hi, how can I help?’ she asked, a bright smile on the face. Her name tag denoted that she was called ‘Michelle’. 

‘Um, can I have a double _espresso_ please’ said Elio; he was used to strong coffee back at home. 

‘Sure’ she said with a bright smile, and turned to make Elio’s coffee. 

‘What are you having?’ said Elio to Whitney. 

‘Probably just a latte,’ she said with a shrug. Elio couldn’t help but smile at her pronunciation. 

‘There we go,’ said the barista, pushing Elio’s coffee towards him, ‘That’ll be $0.75’ 

Elio gave the girl a dollar and told her to keep the change. She smiled and thanked him. 

‘Do you wanna take that table by the window?’ said Whitney, whilst waiting for her coffee. 

‘Sure,’ said Elio, turning away to sit down. This café was on the edge of a beautiful looking quad, with old looking buildings surrounding it. They weren’t old compared to the buildings of Bergamo, Florence, or Rome. They were imitation, but Elio appreciated the effort, it kind of reminded him of trips he took as a child. He rested his hand on chin and looked out at the comings and goings of the quad. He hadn’t really given much thought what other subjects he wanted to take up, but he knew that he had two spaces to fill for his first semester. He knew he wasn’t going to take science or maths, or anything like that. He guessed that he’d have to wait and see what presented itself this afternoon. He looked up as Whitney came to join him, and smiled as she sat down. 

**

‘Alright, well I guess I’ll see you in a bit,’ said Zoe, ‘I’ve got to sign up over in Hulzberger Hall. Modern Languages and Linguistics is in there.’

There were stood in a busy quad, where students were coming and going to sign up for their classes this semester. There were three halls around this quad – each with different subject areas for students to go and sign up. 

‘We’ll see you in a bit then,’ said Teddy, ‘We’re over there in Hewitt.’ 

Zoe just nodded, her eyes looked heavy and her face was pale. She was definitely hungover, and had only managed to crawl out of bed to come and sign up for her classes. 

‘C’mon’ said Teddy as Zoe left. Elio just followed Teddy, not really knowing where he was supposed to be going. The building there were going into was a large brownstone looking building with at least eight floors. There was a large banner over some double doors that were thrown open to the quad, noting that this was where sign ups would be taking place for Literature and Histories. 

‘I think literature stuff is over there, I’ll just be at the back,’ said Teddy gesturing to the side as they entered the room. Elio nodded and headed over to the tables. There was a professor or two sat at each of the desks, with a stack of course contents and sign-up sheets in front of them. 

‘Hello,’ said Elio, walking up to the table. 

‘Hi,’ said one of the academics, ‘I’m Professor Owen; are you a lit major?’ 

‘Yes,’ said Elio, ‘Elio Perlman; I’m studying English and European Literature.’

‘Alright,’ said Professor Owen looking down her list of majors, ‘You’ll sign up for English Lit here and European at the table over there. I’ll give you a list of your books as well, and then first classes start on Monday. You’ll have two spaces left for electives.’

Elio nodded trying to take all of this information in, before signing his details on the document at the front of the desk. The Professor handed him the list of books and then he repeated the exercise at the European Literature table. 

He was holding a load of papers, and he still needed to pick two more. He figured he might minor in history, he’d always been interested in it, and perhaps he might do German. His mother would like that; and it also meant that he’d know what she was yelling when she was angry at him, other than the odd word he caught here and there. Although that very rarely happened these days; his mother was rarely angry anyway – it just didn’t seem to be in her nature. He’d have to go to the building that Zoe had gone to in order to sign up for German – the only languages in this building were ancient ones. 

His eyes scanned the busy hall, looking for the history table, spotting it in the back corner of the room. After asking a few questions about the syllabus Elio was sold, and had signed up and got his book list from the friendly female professor sitting at the desk.

He turned to look for Teddy, figuring that he must have done signing up for his classes by now. Elio meandered away from the history table and along the row, passing American Literature, and Ancient Languages. He spotted Teddy, he was chatting to another student at the table, both of them looking at the book list. The other student nodded, pointing at one or two of the names on the list, to which Teddy clearly agreed with something, and then the other student moved away, creating a view towards the back of the hall and the professors that Teddy had previously been talking to. 

And Elio was floored, stopping dead in his tracks, his shoes squeaking on the linoleum floor. There he was. Sitting at the Classics table, his right elbow on the table, whilst he was writing something with his left hand. It was funny, it was something that Elio had never noticed before, that he was left handed. Or was he ambidextrous? His blond hair was still falling his face, slightly longer now than Elio remembered it, and he was still wearing a loose open necked shirt – this time it was a pale yellow. Elio wondered if his star was around his neck. It probably was; Elio didn’t think he’d ever seen him take it off. 

‘Over here!’ Elio heard Teddy’s voice and saw that he was waving him over. Elio hesitantly walked over to Teddy, noting that _he_ hadn’t looked up as Teddy had shouted, but had continued scribbling on the enrolment sheets. Elio guessed that he’d tuned out the noise of the busy hall. 

‘Did you get signed up?’ said Teddy, once Elio had walked over. 

‘Uh yes,’ he said, dropping his voice a little, hoping that he wouldn’t be noticed, ‘I need to go over to where Zoe went though to get my last one’

‘Oh, you going to do a language, I thought you already knew about twelve from what Zoe had been saying?’ said Teddy with a grin. 

‘That’s a bit of an exaggeration,’ mumbled Elio, practically bouncing on the balls of his feet, hating every second of standing here, hoping that he wouldn’t be spotted in plain sight. 

‘Oh Elio, by the way-’ said Teddy, his hand flying up and to his right. That was it, his head jerked up, and Elio was caught like the deer in the crosshairs of a rifle, as the blue eyes raked across every inch of his skinny frame, shock registering on those normally so relaxed features. 

‘This is Associate Professor Davis, but he’ll hate me saying that. He prefers Oliver,’ continued Teddy, ‘Oliver, this is Elio. Oliver was one of my favourite tutors last year.’ 

‘Hello,’ said Oliver, after a minute, his throat seemingly unsticking with his words. His eyes scanned Elio’s face as he extended his hand for Elio to shake. Elio was aware that Teddy was talking again, but he wasn’t listening. He was looking at Oliver, and feeling the large hand underneath his. The skin was still smooth, just like he remembered, and his hand felt dwarfed by the American’s. Just like it had last summer. He wasn’t wearing a wedding ring; but then again, most Jewish men didn’t. 

‘Uh hello,’ said Elio after a moment, realising that he was supposed to speak in response to Oliver’s greeting. His voice was slightly husky from surprise. He swallowed, to try and mask the nervousness he felt. 

Oliver released his hand after a moment, ‘So, are you going to sign up for Classics?’ 

Elio shook his head, not really knowing what to say, ‘Um no, probably not.’ 

‘You should!’ said Teddy, ‘First year classics is great!’

Elio tried to smile, but it probably came out more like a grimace, and he shrugged, ‘My father is a classics professor; I’ve kind of had my fill of it.’ 

Teddy made a disappointed face and then shrugged, ‘That’s a shame. Alright, do you want to go and find Zoe in the other hall?’ 

‘Yeah,’ said Elio. Anything to get away from the man behind the table. 

‘Wait,’ said Oliver, half standing out of his seat as they turned to walk away, ‘What did you say your surname was again?’ 

Elio turned back towards him, his eyes filled with a mixture of shock and anger at his question; he couldn’t help himself. He saw that Oliver looked equally as serious as he leaned across the table , his blue eyes boring into his; almost desperate in their sincerity. 

‘Perlman,’ said Elio, ‘Elio Perlman’ 

Oliver nodded, taking in the name, still not breaking his gaze, ‘I’ve been using your father’s work for years. Ever since I did my undergraduate dissertation. Do you think I could talk to you about some of his work at some point?’

Elio swallowed, realising that Oliver was making an excuse for them to cross paths once again. 

‘Um, yes, sure,’ said Elio, not really knowing what else to say, and knowing that to refuse would look very odd to Teddy who was still standing there. 

‘Okay, thanks,’ said Oliver, clapping his hand on Elio’s shoulder, his warm thumb pressing into the flesh where his shoulder met his arm. For the briefest of seconds the thumb moved, rubbing just so Elio could feel it. Then he removed his hand. Elio felt breathless. He couldn’t have been more unsettled if Oliver had grabbed him and kissed him in front of everyone in the hall. 

‘Come on then,’ said Teddy, ‘Zoe will be wondering what’s taking so long.’ Elio nodded, gathering his stuff back into his arms from where he’d put it down on the table. 

‘See you for class on Tuesday Oliver!’ said Teddy. 

‘Later!’ said Oliver, sitting down again, and putting Teddy’s sign up form in a folder. 

Teddy turned, guiding Elio towards the entrance doors, and the way that he needed to go across the quad for his last sign up. Elio looked back over his shoulder as they left; but Oliver was looking down at his notes again, and didn’t look up as they left.

‘Are you okay?’ asked Teddy, ‘You look a bit pale’

Elio shook his head, ‘It was just hot in there with all those people. I’ll be okay with some fresh air.’ 

‘Alright,’ said Teddy, ‘Come on. It’s this way.’ 

Elio nodded, took a deep breath, and tried not to look quite so wan faced, as it went to find out where to sign up for his last subject.


	4. Will I Drown?

Elio was lying on his bed in his room, reading one of his history books that he’d bought from a bookshop earlier that day. This first year of the elective would be a whirlwind tour through about two thousand years of history, to give them a good grounding if they chose to take the subject in the following years. Elio wasn’t sure whether he would do that, but it was interesting nonetheless. The book he was currently reading bits of was a weighty tome regarding the early history of far eastern civilisations, and the rise and fall of various Indian and Chinese empires. He’d never really contemplated history from a non-western perspective before, and to do so was very thought provoking – especially when considering all the areas that he may have missed out on before. His father had studied, and therefore taught Elio, a little bit about near-eastern and Persian influences on classical architecture and sculpture, but nothing really beyond that.

It was slowly getting dark outside, but the days were still relatively long, so it was only mid-evening. He wondered whether any of his flatmates were planning on doing anything tonight. He marked the page of his book, and got up, heading into the kitchen. Alana was sitting at the table, just finishing eating her dinner, whilst reading a paperback novel. A radio played from the kitchen windowsill. Elio had a large late lunch, so hadn’t bothered with dinner himself.

‘Hi,’ he said to her.

‘ _Ciao Italiano_ ’ she said with a grin on her face, putting her book down.

‘ _Ciao_ ’ he responded with an answering grin, ‘ _come va?_ ’

‘Ah, don’t go any further!’ said Alana, ‘”Ciao” is literally the only Italian I know.’

Elio chuckled, ‘Well for the record, I just asked you how’s it going?’

‘It’s alright,’ said Alana, with a shrug, ‘Not seen the others in a while though. I think Zoe went to the library, Teddy went out, and I have no idea where Whitney is. I haven’t seen her in days.’

‘Probably studying somewhere,’ said Elio, with a shrug, ‘Are you up to anything tonight?’

‘Not really,’ said Alana, ‘Why?’

‘Do you wanna go and get a drink somewhere?’ asked Elio, hoping that it didn’t sound too inappropriate to ask her, and only her. Alana was pretty, Elio thought, in a sort of valley-girl kind of way, but he didn’t desire her.

‘We’ll have to go to a hole in the wall,’ said Alana.

‘Yeah probably, Teddy pointed a couple out to me when we wandering around last night,’ said Elio, ‘I’m sure I could find my way back’

‘I know one or two as well,’ said Alana with a smile, ‘Alright, let me just finish up here and I’ll put some lippy on and then we can go?’

‘Sure’ he said, turning back to return to his bedroom. It always amused him when girls put on make up to go out. Marzia had never really worn make up, other than maybe some mascara. Of course, he’d seen Chiara wear it, but then he’d never really seen Chiara without it, so therefore it had looked all the same to him. Although, he admitted, he had registered the Chiara probably didn’t have blue eyelids in real life.

He changed his shirt into a high necked black button up with a red motif on it. He buttoned it up to the top and put a neckerchief on the top. He glanced in the mirror and ran his hand back through his hair, before turning back towards the door when he heard a knock.

‘Are you ready?’ came Alana’s voice.

‘Sure!’ said Elio, grabbing his wallet from his desk and shoving it in his jacket pocket before opening the door and heading out into the corridor. Alana was wearing big pink hoop earrings and frosty pink lipstick to match.

‘So which way we headed?’ said Alana as they stepped out onto the street.

‘Not too far,’ said Elio, walking in the direction of what he hoped was one of the bars that Teddy had shown him yesterday, ‘I just wanted a change of scene.’

Alana nodded, agreeing, before getting a cigarette out of her purse and lighting it.

‘Want one?’ she asked, offering him the pack.

‘No thanks,’ said Elio.

‘Don’t smoke?’ she asked.

‘Sometimes,’ Elio said non-committal, as they turned down a little alley way, to a nondescript door at the end. The only sign that this was the right place was the tiny sign by the door frame, which noted ‘students welcome’. Elio thought it was so strange. In Italy they basically didn’t have any underage drinking laws, and there wasn’t really a problem with youth drinking, and yet in the US they were so strict about it, having just put the age up to 21 in the last year, and they had some of the worst alcohol problems in the world. It didn’t make any sense to him.

Alana knocked on the door, which opened slightly, noting that there were two of them, and that they were students. Then they were let in. Inside was a small smoky room, for all the world like the speakeasys of the prohibition era. Elio reflected that it probably had been at one point, as the booths had a distinctly 1920s look to them. There was also a girl sitting on a stool, playing a jazz guitar, and crooning softly into the microphone.

‘Drink?’ asked Alana, as the wound their way through the people in the room. It was relatively busy, and there was a smell of smoke in the air.

‘Yeah,’ said Elio, heading towards the bar, ‘What do you want?’

Alana, who had been in the process of getting her money out looked up, ‘Are you sure?’

‘Yeah, I’m the one who dragged you out,’ said Elio with a grin, ‘What would you like?’

‘Uh, just a small white wine,’ said Alana, ‘Thanks. I’ll go find somewhere to sit.’

Elio ordered Alana’s wine when the barkeep was free, and a red wine for himself. He’d got the house red, because he wasn’t sure that he’d be able to get much of a selection here. Not that it mattered, really, as he took a sip – it tasted alright. He paid and headed over to where Alana was sat, she was currently watching the girl on the guitar.

‘I just asked who was playing,’ she said as Elio sat down, ‘And turns out that it’s open mic tonight until ten.’

‘Oh, that’s cool,’ said Elio, looking over at the girl who was playing, her fingers moving slowly up and down the fretboard as she sang.

‘Do you play?’ asked Alana.

Elio nodded, ‘Yeah. Piano mostly, but I dabble in other things.’

‘oooh, like what?’ asked Alana, ‘I’ve played the drums since I was kid; but you can’t really come to an open mic with just that – it wouldn’t really work, a drummer on their own!’

‘Oh, I don’t know,’ said Elio with a chuckle, ‘It could be some sort of new creative experiment you were trying,’

Alana chuckled and shrugged, ‘What else do you play?

‘I’ve been known to play the guitar,’ said Elio, ‘And I picked up the French horn for about a year when I was like thirteen, but haven’t played it since, so I’d definitely be fairly rusty!’

‘You should get up there,’ said Alana with a smile, cocking her head in the direction of the stage.

‘I don’t have my guitar with me,’ said Elio rather stupidly.

‘I’m sure the girl would lend you hers?’ said Alana.

Elio squirmed, ‘Well, I don’t sing – so people might find it a bit strange. Maybe another night when I’ve had time to think about it.’

Alana giggled at his discomfort, ‘Alright, I’ll hold you to that.’

Elio smiled, his eyes once again heading to the girl who was still playing. She was very good, her voice matching the toned down smoky atmosphere of the bar, husky and sultry in the way she phrased her words. Elio glanced over at the bar and he nearly slopped his wine down the front of his shirt. Standing with his back to them was Oliver. Elio could only see the back of his head, but he was sure it was him; the shoulders, and the colour of his hair. He wanted to sink down his seat; but something kept him looking over, almost hoping that he would turn and -,

It wasn’t Oliver. Elio blushed crimson at his own mistake, even though he hadn’t mentioned it to anyone else. The stranger wasn’t quite as tall as Oliver, and his features didn’t have the same strong lines as the associate-professor, but from the back he could have been his doppelganger. Elio felt eminently foolish at the hope that had burgeoned in his chest at seeing the blond head. He almost rolled his eyes at himself and took another gulp of wine to hide his confusion.

‘Do your classes start tomorrow?’ he asked Alana, turning away from the blond stranger near the bar.

‘No, Tuesday,’ said Alana, ‘What about you?’

‘Yeah, I’ve got Early European Literature at 9’ said Elio. Alana pulled a face, causing Elio to laugh.

‘Sounds difficult,’ said Alana.

‘Not compared to whatever it is you’re doing, what is it again; bio-chem?’ said Elio.

‘Yeah,’ said Alana, ‘But that’s just the way my brain works.’

‘What do you want to do?’ asked Elio.

‘Something to do with medical engineering,’ said Alana, ‘I’d like to work in disease control and cure; something like that.’

‘Wow,’ said Elio, his eyebrows heading up towards his hairline, ‘That sounds intense.’

Alana half-shrugged, ‘What about you?’

‘I don’t really know,’ said Elio, taking another sip of his wine, ‘I guess I’ve always been sort of heading down the academic route – so I guess I’ll probably end up doing something like that. I’m not sure yet though.’

‘Well you’ve got a while to figure it out,’ Alana smiled, ‘I’m one of the weird ones because I know what I want to do.’

‘Must be nice though,’ said Elio, glancing around again.

Alana shrugged, and then held up her wine glass, ‘To not having a clue what you want to do with your life.’

Elio chuckled, ‘I’ll drink to that. _Cin Cin!'_

__**_ _

_’You’ll kill me if you stop! Please… Oliver!’ Elio gasped, his hands tangled in the blonde locks of the man on his knees in front of him. His mouth was warm and tight around his cock, and Elio could feel his lower stomach tightening as Oliver continued, using his tongue and humming around him. One of his large hands wrapped around Elio’s bony hips, the other stroking up and down his thigh. Elio’s jeans and boxers were shoved down to just above his knee, enough room for Oliver to go down on him._

_‘Argh, urgh, please’ was all Elio could manage as Oliver swallowed him down, taking Elio into his throat, his soft palate constricting around him, into a wonderful, warm, wet heat. Elio could feel his brain beginning to short circuit. He could feel the rough brick against his back, of the wall of the building that Oliver had assumedly shoved him up against, before getting to his knees. Elio didn’t remember how it had happened. All he could think about was the mouth, the lips, the tongue, and the perfectly obscene wet noises Oliver was making as he sucked him off. He pulled back slightly, concentrating on the sensitive head, sucking and licking at the vein on the underside, and then the slit at the head of his cock, that made Elio push his head back against the wall as he practically saw stars, moaning unintelligibly._

_Elio’s fingers tightened in Oliver’s hair, pulling at his scalp, trying to warm him, ‘Ah, gonna cum, Oliver, please, fuck!’_

_Elio felt Oliver smirk around him and take him back down to the root. Elio couldn’t help it after that; the warm tightness of Oliver’s throat had him -,_

Elio sat up in bed; his eyes quickly trying to adjust to the darkness of the room. He put his hand under the duvet and felt his half-hard cock; the result of the dream he had been having. He made an angry noise in his throat and flipped onto his front, swearing into his pillow, because that hurt, but at least it might deal with his erection. Elio was fuming; how dare that interloper invade his dreams when for so many months he had been at peace? Elio could remember how the dream had gone, a memory of how Oliver’s mouth had felt around-,

Elio mentally slapped himself. He did not want to go down this road tonight. Instead Elio imagined that even now, Oliver was lying in some big double bed, in the suburbs outside of the city, the warm form of his undoubtedly beautiful wife beside him. Elio wondered if he’d made love to her earlier this night; his cock sliding inside of her, as she wrapped her long limbs around him, a familiar pleasure found in a familiar place.

Elio swore into his pillow again, trying to shut out any unhelpful thoughts of the blond man. He punched the pillow into a more comfortable shape and tried to go back to sleep. He tried thinking about the fairy tales by the Brothers Grimm and Hans Christian Anderson that he’d been reading earlier – tomorrow they’d be starting European Literature with Western European folk and fairy tales.

Anything to try and keep his mind off what he had been dreaming about.

**

‘Elio!’

Elio turned at the call of his voice. He was in a random corridor and he wasn’t sure where he was, or how to get back to somewhere where he would know where he was.

‘Oh, hello Teddy,’ he said, seeing his flatmate approaching, against the sea of students looking for their next class.

‘Are you alright?’ Teddy asked, as he came to halt in front of Elio.

‘Yeah, I’m just trying to find Lecture Theatre Two,’ said Elio, ‘I’ve got a while before I need to be in there, but I’m not sure I’m going the right way.’

‘You’re not,’ Teddy chuckled, ‘It’s back along this corridor and then up a flight of stairs.’

‘Ah okay,’ said Elio, ‘Thank you’

‘Anyway, I was looking for you, to give you this,’ said Teddy, ‘I was going to give it to you at the flat later, but then spotted you.’

Teddy held out a note for Elio to take.

‘What is it?’ asked Elio stupidly.

‘It’s from Pro. Davis,’ said Teddy, ‘I’ve just had his Classical Philosophy lecture. Bloody hell that was complicated. I’m not sure how I’m going to get on with that this year. Big step up from the stuff he taught in 101 last year. Anyway; he gave that to me to give to you.’

‘Um thanks,’ said Elio, taking the piece of paper from Teddy, ‘Do you know what it says?’

Teddy looked at him oddly, and then shook his head, ‘I’ve not read it.’

‘Right,’ said Elio, shoving the note in his pocket, ‘Well thanks.’

‘Alright, I’ll see you later at home,’ said Teddy, and then disappeared along the corridor. Elio waited for a second before turning around and heading up the stairs the Teddy had pointed out to him. He could feel the note burning in his pocket, but he desisted from taking it out until he found the lecture theatre where he needed to be next. He poked his head inside and saw that it was still empty. It wasn’t surprising; there was still twenty-five minutes to go before the beginning of the lecture.

Elio slid down onto the floor his back to the wall, putting his bag on the linoleum beside him. He fished out the slightly crumpled piece of paper out of his pocket. His hands were trembling ever so slightly as he held it. Did he actually want to read it? What could Oliver have to say to him? He hadn’t replied to the last letter that Elio had sent him in May. What could he write to him now? Elio had a momentary impulse to screw it up and throw it away. Honestly though, he knew he would never do that. Instead, he slid his thumb under the opening, and folded the note out flat.

He'd written in pencil, not following the guide lines; instead just writing diagonally across the sheet.

_**I’d like to see you. Tomorrow after classes, my office.** _

_**E** _

Elio gasped in a breath. He’d signed it ‘E’, as in ‘Elio’. Elio’s heart was hammering beneath his ribcage. It was the tiniest signifiers of remembrance; with the rest of the note being perfunctory at best. Oliver never had minced his words. It wasn’t what the note said, it was that tiny, scrawled E underneath it that had set Elio’s pulse racing. That was theirs. Their thing. And Oliver had used it once again, pushing it back into Elio’s life, almost rudely, as if he didn’t care about the effect that it would have on him.

Elio’s eyes scanned the note once more, his eyes tracing the way that Oliver wrote his letters. Then he folded it up and put his head back against the wall.

‘Yes, yes, I’ll see you… Elio,’ he breathed to the empty corridor.


	5. Cross The River

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!
> 
> Thank you to so much to everyone who's commented so far. It means so much when you guys do that; it really keeps me wanting to write. Yeah, I'm a comment junkie - ngl. I did have a question though - can someone please explain to me the difference between subscriptions and bookmarks? I don't get it! 
> 
> Final note - I've decided I'm going to post new chapters on Saturdays and Tuesdays, just so I can keep rolling over. I've got another two chapters of this written already, but that'll give me some time to make sure I know that I can keep on top of it! 
> 
> Hope you enjoy this chapter! Let me know! xxx

Elio was stood in front of the mirror in his room, feeling all the world like a teenage girl. He’d changed his shirt three times in the past twenty minutes. He felt uncomfortable and out of place in his own skin. He didn’t know how to change that. In the end, he settled on the second shirt that he’d discarded about five minutes previously, a skin-tight pair of black jeans, his worn-down brogues, and a swipe of eyeliner. It was barely any different to what he’d worn to class earlier, apart from the eyeliner. Well either way, it would have to do. It was half past four now, and if he was going to find Oliver’s office before five, he would have to get moving. He vaguely knew where he was going, having asked Teddy where the Classics department was earlier that day. It was in that same building where they’d signed up for their classes, but on the top floor. Elio hoped there was an elevator; he didn’t want to be out of breath when he arrived.

He exited the flat, passing Whitney on the stairs as he went down. She smiled at him, being unable to wave as her arms were – as usual – full of books. She looked well balanced, however, so he didn’t stop to ask her if she needed his help. He hurried out and along the street, lighting up a cigarette as he went. He usually only smoked if he was nervous or angry. He couldn’t decide which of the two he felt right at this moment, so he smoked just to assuage the distinctly unsettled feeling that he was carrying in his chest.

He'd spoken to his parents earlier in the day, calling them just before they would have been going to bed in Italy. They’d wanted to know how his first classes were going, how his flat was, etc. Elio had enjoyed chatting to them, and it had surprised him how much their voices had reminded him that he missed them, and missed home. He never thought he’d feel homesick; but he missed their comforting presence as the overpowering force in the house. They’d be heading back to Milan very shortly, and to the townhouse they owned in the city. As they got older Elio knew they liked to spend as much time at the country house as possible, but soon his dad’s research position would call them back to the city.

He picked his way along the street, students and other New Yorkers winding their way along with him. He heard the rattle of the subway under a grill at the corner as he crossed an intersection. He could hear someone playing the violin out of an upstairs window, and smiled as he recognised a piece of Liszt, one that he had himself had played many a time on the piano. His fingers tapped out the cadence on his thigh, until the music faded from his ears, drowned out by the sounds of the city. He stubbed out his spent cigarette on the pavement under his toe.

Elio arrived in front of the Hewitt building about fifteen minutes later and looked up. There were still lectures going on inside; the last ones of the day, but Elio assumed that Oliver wouldn’t be teaching at this hour, having asked him to meet him. At the very thought Elio’s heartrate sped up, and he tried to calm himself before he stepped inside the cool hallway. He looked around for an elevator, and thankfully spotted one in the corner of the expansive entrance hall. The huge room where they had signed up for their classes was on the left. He stood for a moment in front of the elevator; if he did this he would be crossing the rubicon. There would be no going back. He could just deny that Teddy had ever given him the note, or that he’d taken the conscious decision to ignore it. He chewed on the inside of his lip for a moment, mulling these thoughts over in his mind. Then he stepped forward.

Elio opened the metal grille in front of the doors and stepped inside. He pressed for the top floor, and shut the doors, locking them in place, turning around as the elevator trundled upwards. It was clearly very old, and Elio could see the pulleys and counterweights hard at work above his head when he glanced up.

The elevator creaked to a halt on the eighth floor and Elio opened the doors and got out, looking left and right. Teddy had told him that the office number was 34. He had no idea which way that was.  He looked at the number of the first door that said 99, and the one next to that said 97, with 98 on the opposite wall. Elio shook his head – who started a numbering system with the last one in the sequence? He figured if he walked in the other direction then he would reach 34 quicker. He continued around the corridor, counting in his head, as at a really random point in the corridor it went from 109 to 001. Whoever had thought this up was clearly in a funny mood. After turning the corner, he ended up next to 30… 32… and number 34 was there.

The door was closed, a slider on the door denoting that this was the office of _Assoc. Professor O. Davis_. Elio couldn’t help but raise his hand, to touch the embossed sign. There was no-one else in the corridor, so Elio felt a tiny bit better as he knocked on the heavy wood panelling.

There was a beat, just after his knuckles left the surface.

‘Come in!’

Elio turned the handle after the commanding voice from the inside directed him to do so, and pushed the door open.

It was less of a shock than last week; when he’d been utterly floored by his appearance, but he still managed to make Elio’s heart pound uncomfortably under his ribs as he stepped into the office, and shut the door behind him. It was like being hit by a ray of sunlight after spending a long time standing in the dark, as he took in the figure of Oliver; sitting behind his desk, where he’d been reading a paper.

Oliver stood up and rounded the desk, which Elio noted was covered in other scattered papers.

‘You came,’ Oliver said. Today he was wearing beige linen slacks, it still being pleasantly warm outside, and a long sleeve shirt, with the cuffs rolled up to above his elbows. It gave him a distinctly relaxed but gentile look, one that Elio’s eyes drank in. He noticed Oliver always scanned his figure from head to toe, and he couldn’t help but preen very slightly before replying.

‘Yes,’ said Elio softly, ‘Teddy gave me your note.’

Oliver paused, as if he was expecting Elio to say something else, but when he didn’t said, ‘Thank you for seeing me.’

Elio just nodded a little stiffly, his eyes still glancing around the room. It had a view across the beautiful quad, and to the city beyond. He could see the skyscrapers of downtown in the distance.

‘It _is_ good to see you Elio,’ said Oliver, drawing his attention back to him.

Elio looked at his face; he was still breathtakingly beautiful. Those Hollywood good looks, and the confident gait that had caused his mother to call him _il cauboi_ last summer.

‘It’s good to see you too,’ said Elio, genuinely. Now that he said it he could admit it to himself that it was true. To see Oliver again was a pleasure, to look once again upon the face that he’d imagined for so many months, and then for months after tried to suppress in his mind.

‘I didn’t know you were coming to Columbia, otherwise I would have been in contact’ said Oliver offhand, ‘The last time you wrote you were still trying to decide whether or not to study music or not.’

‘You didn’t respond to my last letter,’ said Elio, changing the subject slightly. The unsaid words in the air saying that if he had, he would of known about his choices of school.  

Oliver looked perplexed, ‘Which one? The letter with the news about Vimini?’

Elio nodded, a sudden wave of sadness rolling over him as Oliver said the name. He swallowed to push down the mucus that had suddenly gathered in his throat.

‘Yes, I did,’ said Oliver his face reflecting his anguish, ‘Did you not receive it? I wrote back the same day I got it.’

Elio shook his head, suddenly feeling slightly guilty in his inferred accusation that Oliver hadn’t cared. He had thought that it had seemed very unlike him.

‘I did write back,’ Oliver said again, ‘To offer my sadness and my condolences. I put a separate note in for Vimini’s father.’

‘Well it hadn’t arrived by the time I left,’ Elio offered, ‘Perhaps it got lost in the mail.’

Oliver nodded, although he clearly saw this for the flimsy excuse that it was, ‘Can you let her father know? If you see him?’

Elio nodded, knowing that this mattered to Oliver, ‘Yes, I’ll tell him you wrote. Perhaps it will have arrived by the time I return anyway.’

Elio looked at the desk, where a hardback copy of a book lay with its spine towards him;  _Panta rhei: The Flowing Thought of Heraclitus,_  written in gold leaf on a green background.

‘You got it published,’ said Elio, taking a hand out of his pocket and pointing at the book. Oliver looked back at what he was pointing at.

‘Ah yes,’ said Oliver, ‘Got the final editions back from the publisher after 2nd revisions last month. I sent a copy to your father, but given what you’ve just told me, I’m not overly confident that it will have got there.’

‘I’ll ask him,’ said Elio, ‘If not, and if you don’t mind, I could take a copy back with me when I go home?’

Oliver smiled at him, his bright perfect teeth showing through the grin, ‘Yes, that would be great.’

Oliver straightened up, standing to his entire six foot five inches. Elio wasn’t short, but Oliver’s massive frame made him feel tiny.

‘Well anyway,’ said Oliver, ‘I was hoping that we might go somewhere to get something to eat and to talk? Catch up a bit?’

Elio couldn’t help but smirk a bit, _catch up?_  Is that what it would be called? Either way Elio knew that he wasn’t quite ready to leave Oliver’s presence just yet; the presence that filled up his entire vision and mind, and had done since he’d spotted him at the table last week.

‘Yes, okay,’ said Elio, ‘You’ll have to tell me where. I haven’t really had a chance to explore the city at all.’

Oliver smiled, ‘Great, well I know somewhere we can go. Away from the university a bit. We’ll get a taxi. Just let me get my things and lock up.’

Elio watched as he gathered his papers into a heap, and pushed them into a brown and slightly worn leather briefcase. He slung the strap casually over his shoulder, and ran his hand backwards through his hair, for all the world the cool _Americano_. Oliver gestured Elio out of the office, and he went into the corridor, he heard Oliver thunk the key into the lock, and then they walked down the corridor.

‘Have you managed to find your way around okay?’ asked Oliver as they walked.

‘Err, I got lost a bit,’ said Elio, ‘But it’s been mostly okay. Just try and follow the masses. I somehow ended up in a physics lecture the other day, which was fairly mind-blowing.’

Oliver laughed, ‘I’ll bet.’

Elio smiled; he couldn’t help it when Oliver laughed. It was a full-bodied warm laugh, and it made Elio want to lean into the sound.

They made their way down the stairs, Oliver saying hello to some of the academics as they passed. None of them seemed to mention Elio walking along at his side – he guessed they figured he was either a research associate or a student, still hanging onto the academic after hours. He didn’t really care. He genuinely couldn’t help it, he felt like there was a lightness in his chest that he couldn’t describe. He just didn’t want that bubble to pop.

**

‘Taxi!’ Oliver said loudly as he stepped out into the busy New York street, hailing down one of the many yellow cabs that was driving past. The first one ignored him, but the second pulled in, allowing Oliver and Elio to scramble into the backseat. Elio couldn't help but notice that Oliver's leg brushed against his as he got in.

‘Where to?’ asked the driver who was chewing gum.

‘East 108th and Madison,’ said Oliver, swiftly giving directions.

‘Alrighty,’ said the driver, setting off and taking the next left intersection. It was one of the things Elio liked about New York; the fact that it was built on a grid, meant that it was easy to find one’s location. Albeit he didn’t know where anything else was, but at least he could figure out where he was, and that was a start.

‘Where are you staying?’ asked Oliver as they drove, the traffic making the journey fairly slow.

‘West 122nd off Frederick Douglass Blvd.’ said Elio, ‘There’s a block of flats there.’

‘Ah yes,’ said Oliver, ‘I know of it.’

‘It’s nice,’ said Elio, ‘Although a bit of a change.’

Oliver grinned, ‘I’ll bet.’

Elio looked out of the window, vaguely wondering when they were going to be done with the small talk. He’d never been all that good at it; only learning how to stomach it through repeated exposure to his father’s lunchtime _drudges_. He figured that Oliver probably wanted to get to wherever they were going first.

‘Are your flatmates okay?’ asked Oliver, ‘I mean, I know Teddy, and he seems like an alright guy.’

‘Yeah,’ said Elio, ‘He and Zoe, she’s British, like to party. And then there’s Alana and Whitney. Alana’s cool, and Whitney reminds me of Marzia. She’s quiet and studies really hard.’

Oliver’s eyebrows rose slightly at the name, but he didn’t comment, other than to say, ‘How is Marzia?’

‘She’s good,’ said Elio, ‘She disappeared off to the Sorbonne this week to study Fine Art,’

Oliver smiled, ‘I didn’t know she was an artist…’

‘Yes,’ said Elio, ‘Some of the oil paintings that were in the villa were done by Marzia’

‘That’s amazing’ said Oliver, and then looked across at him, ‘Has she ever painted you?’

Elio blushed furiously, unable to help himself, before answering, ‘Er, not that I’m aware of.’

‘Not that you’re aware of?’ said Oliver with a grin. Elio knew what he was insinuating but didn’t take the bait.

‘How far down?’ asked the driver, interrupting them, as they turned onto East 108th. 

‘Here will do just fine,’ said Oliver, fishing in his pocket for some money to pay the driver. Elio got out, reaching for his own wallet as Oliver followed him.

‘How much do I owe you?’ he asked as Oliver as the taxi drove away.

‘You don’t’ said Oliver, ‘It’s alright.’

Elio opened his mouth to protest, but Oliver interrupted him, ‘It’s good. It’s my shout tonight.’

Elio was taken aback at this statement. Oliver was taking him out? Like what, on a date? Elio shook his head, that was faintly ridiculous. Then again, he was the one who had asked to meet, so he guessed that Oliver felt like he should. He’d see whether he could buy him a drink or something later.

‘It’s just down here,’ said Oliver, gesturing down the street a bit, ‘It’s a Thai place that a friend of mine took me to last year. Do you like Thai food?’

‘I’ve never really had it,’ said Elio, ‘But I’m sure I will.’

Oliver smiled, ‘Excellent.’

The restaurant was down from street level, but was already fairly busy, despite it being very early by Elio’s standards. Oliver looked across, almost as if knew was Elio was thinking.

‘You’ll learn what it’s like over here,’ said Oliver with a grin, ‘Americans think anything after about 7.30 is too late for dinner.’

Elio smiled in response as they went inside. It was cool and quite dark inside, and they were almost immediately seated by a friendly waiter. Oliver asked for a seat at the back, which the waiter was only too happy to sort out. They sat down opposite each other, after Elio had put his jacket on the back of his seat.

‘Is this alright?’ asked Oliver, looking at Elio quite intently. Elio knew there was more to the question than just asking about the restaurant.

‘Yeah,’ said Elio, with a small smile as he picked up his menu, ‘Yeah, I’m alright.’

Oliver smiled in return, enjoying the fact that Elio had picked up on the question without him needing to ask any further.


	6. You're In The Ocean Now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I said to callmemaybyyourname that if I finished chapter eight and started nine I would post this one a day early... well, I've actually finished nine and started ten. Therefore I figured I could post this up a day early to celebrate. I've got lots of time on my hands at the moment so I'm happy to post more often; the posting schedule I put the other day will therefore be my minimum going forward. 
> 
> Big thank you to minniepolkadots, olivereliooliver, hmxu8, and KittenPurple who also gave me feedback/comments on that last chapter. I am truly grateful for all the love/comments and it really does mean a lot. Thank you! 
> 
> Things get more serious in this chapter; in more ways than one. I would love to hear what you think about the way this is going. 
> 
> V  
> xxx

They shared a bottle of good red wine. The restaurant didn’t ask Elio for any age identification, for which he was glad because he didn’t have his with him. He guessed that they figured that Oliver was over 21, so therefore he must be too. Maybe he was just a very young looking 21? Elio had some form of dish with noodles, whereas Oliver had a curry. Elio thought his meal was delicious, although he wasn’t paying overly much attention to the food; he was too busy trying not to look obvious as he drank in the man sitting opposite.

‘So why Literature?’ asked Oliver, just after their mains had arrived, ‘I never did find out why you changed your mind. Why not music?’

Elio shrugged, ‘Music is something that is mine; that I do because I love it, because I’m good at it. Composing and transcribing is something I do because I love it and I’m good at it. I find so much joy in playing the piano, that I didn’t want to lose that joy because it became something that I _had_ to do. That was forced upon me. I still play – a lot – but I want it to be on my terms.’

Oliver nodded, his eyes never leaving Elio’s face, ‘I can understand that. There are some areas of my subject that I used to be absolutely passionate about, but I feel I have sucked all the meat from the bones of my enjoyment because I have simply been over exposed. Once I’d finished my book, I didn’t think I wanted to hear the word “Heraclitus” ever again. Luckily that did fade; but it took a while.’

‘Yeah,’ Elio said softly, ‘And I didn’t want that to happen. I want to continue to love music until the day I die.’

Oliver’s mouth dropped only slightly at the comment, but decided to let it pass. Elio shifted in his seat slightly, looking down at his meal and then back up at Oliver, wondering how on earth to bring up what he wanted to say. He ate a mouthful, slowly, chewing to try and hide his confusion.

‘You alright?’ asked Oliver, noticing his uncomfortable silence.

‘Are you married?’ Elio blurted out, unable to see another way of asking, other than to simply do it, ‘I noticed you weren’t wearing a wedding ring…’

He stopped, feeling eminently foolish, a blush creeping up his neck.

‘Yes,’ said Oliver, after a moment, ‘Yes I am married.’

Elio didn’t know what he felt at the moment. In a weird way he felt relief; so there was no hope, any burgeoning flame that he’d felt when he noticed there was no wedding ring could be extinguished. Oliver belonged to someone else.

‘What’s her name?’ Elio asked.

Oliver looked at him hard, as if trying to discern if he really wanted to know, but probably saw the characteristic openness in Elio’s face and decide he wouldn’t ask otherwise, ‘Naomi.’

Elio couldn’t help but smile, ‘Very Jewish.’

Oliver chuckled and held up his hands, ‘Well… that’s to be expected.’

‘Does she not mind you not having dinner with her tonight?’ Elio asked, and could immediately tell that Oliver could see through his fairly transparent questioning, because his mouth curled up slightly at the corner.

‘She doesn’t live in the city,’ said Oliver, looking at Elio’s face carefully for a reaction, ‘She really dislikes it; says it’s too noisy and dirty; too full of people. So, I live here during the semester, and then join her in The Hamptons for breaks and weekends, that is if I don’t have too much work or research to do on a weekend. I probably go out every other weekend.’

Elio couldn’t help but look a little bit shocked as he mind began scrambling over itself, ‘And that works for you?’

‘And that works for us,’ said Oliver with a shrug, ‘She gets to be close to her parents, her friends, and where she grew up. And I get to work in the city, and at a university I love. Her parents weren’t all that pleased at the arrangement, especially in the first year of marriage. The number of times I heard about how it wasn’t seemly… My mother barely left me alone for the first month of our marriage when she heard what we were planning to do.’

Elio laughed slightly at the statement before Oliver continued, ‘But Naomi’s fairly forward thinking, and managed to win them all over, saying that we would work it out between us. That it was our business how we chose to live our marriage.’

Elio paused, taking a sip of his wine, before looking at Oliver over the lip of his glass, ‘Do you love her?’

Oliver opened his mouth to answer, but was interrupted by the waiter, coming over to ask if their meals were to their liking. Oliver said they were, but could they get some sparkling water? The waiter acquiesced and disappeared towards the bar. Oliver looked back at him before speaking.

‘I love her in a way,’ said Oliver quietly, ‘But I’m not _in_ love with her.’

Elio choked a little on the wine that he had just been about to swallow. Oliver reached over and rubbed him on the back as he spluttered for a moment. Momentarily he couldn’t decide whether he was choking because of the wine or the warm feel of the hand on his back.

‘Sorry,’ he said, as he wiped his mouth on the napkin, ‘Went down the wrong way.’

Oliver just smiled, ‘Yeah, perhaps _don’t_ breathe in your wine.’

Elio chuckled in response, thankfully grabbing a glass of water when the waiter reappeared with the large glass bottle.

‘Does she love you?’ asked Elio. Now that he had begun asking Oliver about his marriage, he couldn’t stop. He _had_ to know. He just had to.

Oliver frowned slightly, his voice dropping a little, ‘I think it’s much the same, although I can’t speak for Naomi, she very much speaks for herself. She’s very fond of me, as I am of her. We grew up together, known each other pretty much all our lives. But we don’t love each other in the way that newlyweds should.’

Elio was sure his mouth was open slightly as he contemplated this statement. He didn’t really know how to respond. In a way, it was everything that he had wanted to hear, and yet in reality, it didn’t change anything. Oliver was still married, regardless of what either of them did within that.

‘I spoke to her the night before the wedding,’ said Oliver, looking at his hands, ‘Asking her if this was what she really wanted to do; giving her an out.’

Elio swallowed, trying to unstick his throat slightly, ‘And what did she say?’

‘She said that she thought this was our best chance of living the lives we wanted; that we could reach an agreement between us, and our families would still be happy,’ said Oliver.

Elio didn’t quite know what to say to this. Oliver looked across at him, blue eyes meeting his, ‘I never told anyone else that. The only people who knew about that we Naomi and I.’

Elio nodded, knowing that he would never tell another living soul about the things that Oliver told him in trust. It meant too much to him to even consider betraying him. Oliver looked down at his plate for a moment, and then back across at him, as if debating whether or not to speak. Elio had never seen Oliver struggle with how to formulate a sentence before; he was always so confident and his words so exact and precise.

‘She’s pregnant’ said Oliver eventually. Elio nodded, unable to react in any other way. He knew that his jaw had instantly tightened, and yet deep down he knew he wasn’t surprised. Oliver said they weren’t _in_ love with each other; it didn’t mean they couldn’t have sex. People who weren’t in love fucked all the time. They’d only been married six months, but that didn’t matter. For all Elio knew it could have been a wedding night baby, or she could have found out last week. It was inconsequential. Either way, it was a fact, and one that he had no right to be angry at. Oliver didn’t belong to him, in the same way that they had never belonged to each other, even last summer. They had existed together because they had wanted to, not because something external to themselves had told them that they should. He tried not to think about Oliver making love to this faceless woman, about him spilling inside of her; the way his face looked when he did so.

‘I got back together with Marzia after Hanukkah,’ said Elio. He was immediately unsure of why he said it the moment the words left his lips; was it in an attempt to hurt Oliver? To make him feel one tiny smidgen of what he himself had felt? To try and make him feel jealous? For one moment he wanted Oliver to imagine him lying with Marzia, cumming with her, into her, and knowing that it wasn’t with him.

‘And now?’ asked Oliver, his voice still gentle, but Elio could hear a very slight strain in the tone, like there was a constriction in his throat.

‘Now, no’ said Elio, ‘We decided it was best to stop what we were doing before we started university.’

Oliver nodded, looking at him carefully, ‘Do you love her?’

Elio immediately knew what he was doing. Turning the tables back in his direction, making him consider the questions that he had just thrown Oliver’s way only minutes before.

‘No,’ said Elio, ‘But I do care for her very much.’

‘Ah, I see,’ said Oliver, knowing that Elio would have immediately drawn the parallels between his own answer and the one that Oliver had given about Naomi. He was asking him, what was the difference?

‘But I’m not married to Marzia,’ said Elio quietly, answering the unspoken question.

‘And your parents understand that that’s alright,’ said Oliver, drinking his own wine. Both of them had finished their meals, and were now just sitting drinking, talking as the light faded outside, and other restaurants goers arrived or left.

‘When I came back,’ said Oliver, and Elio felt his throat involuntarily constrict at the time that this took him back to, ‘My parents immediately started talking to me about marriage. About how I was going to be 25 soon, and it was high time that I proposed to Naomi. My brother had been married at 22. I was falling behind.’

Elio suddenly felt extremely thankful for just how relaxed his parents were; he was only just 19 – having celebrated his birthday just before coming away to the States, but even so there wasn’t the slightest notion that he would have to marry any time soon. The only time that they may have even spoken to him of it was if Marzia had ended up pregnant. If not marriage, there would certainly have been a discussion about his responsibilities and what they now entailed. Thankfully, that hadn’t happened. They’d always been sure to be safe.

‘When is the baby due?’ asked Elio.

‘Not until the early spring,’ said Oliver, ‘My parents were over the moon.’

‘Well having a baby is a joyous thing,’ said Elio, ‘A gift.’

Oliver cocked his head momentarily, his facial expression stating that he wasn’t entirely sure about that.

‘I’m sure you’ll be a great father,’ said Elio, and he meant it. The man in front of him was the epitome of warmth and intelligence.

A small furrow appeared on Oliver’s brow again as he spoke quietly, ‘I do hope so. Regardless of what Naomi and I feel for each other; this is a new life. One that I need to care for.’

‘And you will,’ said Elio encouragingly, unable to help himself, reaching over a laying a hand on top of Oliver’s. Regardless of what Oliver having a baby with someone else did to him, he hated to see the beautiful man in front of him doubt himself. He’d seen it only a few times before, and had tried to dispel it on all occasions. The blond man looked down at where Elio’s tapered fingers lay on top of his own, and Elio felt him turn his hand, so that they were palm to palm for a moment.

‘Shall we get the check?’ Oliver asked eventually.

‘Sure,’ said Elio, ‘Thank you very much for dinner. It was a lovely meal.’

Oliver smiled, with a hint of sadness in that smile, ‘We’ll walk back in the direction of your digs. If it’s too far we can grab a cab.’

‘Alright,’ said Elio, as Oliver caught the eye of the waiter to ask for the bill.

**

It was nearly dark outside, and Elio did his jacket up as the cool air of the city invaded his body heat. It wasn’t cold per say, but it wasn’t the balmy warmth of the day either – the remnant of the hot summer that New York had had.

‘Have you seen much of the city whilst you’ve been here?’ asked Oliver as they turned down the street.

‘No, not yet,’ said Elio, shaking his head, ‘I’ve just been trying to get to know the area around my flat and the university. I haven’t really had time to go much further.’

‘It’s a wonderful city,’ said Oliver, ‘I could show you some of it, if you like?’

‘That would be great,’ said Elio, looking at the buildings on either side of them. Despite it drawing towards night, the streets were still full of people, and cars and taxis zoomed by. It really was the city that never slept. Elio was slowly getting used to the noise at night, although he was sometimes awoken by something if it was close at hand; the two men having a fight just outside his window the other night for example.

Despite everything Oliver had said at dinner, Elio felt a lightness that couldn’t entirely be explained. He just liked being here, in this city, with Oliver. He was walking beside him, and Elio felt his arm against him.

‘Oh fucking hell,’ said Oliver suddenly, his voice suddenly growling in anger, his stride lengthening for a moment or two, as he walked over to a streetlight that had a poster tacked to it. Before Elio could see what it was, Oliver had ripped it down, and torn the sheet of paper straight down the middle. He then screwed it up and threw it in the nearest bin.

‘What was that?’ Elio asked slightly breathlessly; it had all happened so fast.

‘Nothing, just stupid people spreading stupid opinions,’ said Oliver, his face dark.

‘I think there’s another one,’ said Elio, ‘Just up there.’

Oliver nodded, seeing that Elio was pointing to an electronic switchboard hub; ‘they’re all over the place. I just try and tear them down when I see them.’

Elio glanced at the streetlight up ahead and saw another of the posters attached to this one. He looked at it, before Oliver had a chance to reach it. His eyes widened as he read what it said. It was a white flyer with a red text on it; there was a grotesque caricature that Elio was sure he’d seen in some of history textbooks when he was at school.

**NEW WORLD ORDER:**

**Are Jews Behind New York’s Problems?**

**Controlling Finance**   
**Access To Government**   
**Positions of Power**

**When they have the power; we suffer.**

Elio instantly felt like he’d swallowed an ice cube. The star of David he was wearing around his neck suddenly felt like it weighed a tonne, and flashed like a beacon against his skin; marking him out.

‘Just ignore it,’ said Oliver, coming up beside him and tearing it down, ‘It’s just some fucking idiots trying to stir up trouble.’

Elio swallowed, feeling as if there was a lump in his throat, ‘I didn’t know people still thought like that.’

Oliver nodded, a little sadly, ‘Especially in New York. Anywhere where things are going a bit shit, there will be lowlifes who try to blame one type of people or another.’

Elio rubbed at the back of his neck, where the catch of his necklace was.

‘Don’t worry about it,’ said Oliver, ‘There’s millions of people in this city who _don’t_ believe that.’

Elio nodded, trying to believe him. All of sudden he felt very exposed standing here in the street.

‘This is what I’d meant when I say I didn’t know much about anything at all,’ said Elio, looking at him, ‘Partly.’

Oliver’s lips twitched slightly, as he remembered, ‘Come on. My apartment isn’t far from here. You look like you could use a drink.’

Elio let him take by the elbow and lead him away down the street. Elio saw another two of the posters as they walked.


	7. Ride The Wave

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! 
> 
> Well, this is my longest chapter yet... coming in at nearly 5,000 words! I hope you like it. Feedback would be greatly appreciated and I would love you forever. What do you think is going to happen? I'd love to hear your theories! <3 
> 
> A wee bit of smut coming in this chapter... although probably not what you're expecting. Also, I should probably mention that I am not Jewish (although I do have Jewish heritage), and therefore don't have much other than google/wikipedia to look stuff up. If there are any glaring mistakes I'm making, please let me know! 
> 
> Much love... 
> 
> V  
> xxx

‘There you go,’ said Oliver, pushing a drink into Elio’s hand. It was a short crystallised glass with an amber coloured liquid inside, piled on some ice. Elio took a sip, quite liking the way the alcohol instantly burned the back of his throat. He vaguely thought he’d probably had more hard liquor since he’d arrived in this city than he’d had in his life before now. He didn’t really have time to focus on that though as he was still thinking about who could have written the hate propaganda that they’d seen on the street. He felt slightly foolish; previously imagining that things like that had been a part of Nazi Germany and nowhere else. He took another sip of the drink.

‘Whisky?’ he asked, looking across at Oliver, who was standing by the kitchen counter with his hands in his pockets, watching him closely.

‘Yeah,’ said Oliver, ‘I don’t know whether you’ll like it not.’

‘It’s good,’ said Elio, looking around trying to take his mind off things, ‘Your apartment is cool.’

‘A bit on the small side,’ said Oliver with a shrug, ‘But it’s all I need; rent is getting really expensive around here.’

‘I think it’s great,’ said Elio, causing Oliver to look slightly embarrassed but pleased at the same time.

 The apartment was the epitome of Oliver, but it brought home to Elio that he was just a 25-year-old man, living mostly on his own in the big city. There was a small bar area in the kitchen, books were strewn across most of the surfaces, and there were posters tacked up on the walls. A few were to do with academic talks that Oliver had been to, but there were some club posters, a few ticket stubs from Carnegie Hall, a few more from Madison Square Gardens, and a signed poster from a Blondie concert from two summers ago.

He didn’t have a TV; instead the available walls were covered in bookshelves, although one of those was given over to a large stereo system. Elio noticed that there were no pictures of his family in this room. Perhaps he had a picture of his wife on their wedding day on his bedside table.  There was only this main room, and then what Elio assumed was the bedroom and a bathroom leading off it. It was on the fourth floor of a block, and looked down at a small corner park.

Elio saw that there were two silver candlesticks with fresh candles on the windowsill, with matches next to them. It was nearly dark, but as they had been out when the sun had set, Oliver hadn’t lit them.

Oliver saw where he was looking and half shrugged, ‘I know Naomi’s supposed to do it; but it’s something that I tend to do when I’m here alone.’

Elio shrugged in response, ‘Mafalda lights the candles in our house. Has been doing it ever since I was old enough to remember. It seems odd not to have that now.’

‘Do you want to light them?’ Oliver asked hesitantly. Elio nodded and put the glass down on the sill to pick up the matches. He quickly lit both the candles, his lips moving silently through a quick prayer to welcome in the _Shabbat_. Again, it had been something that he had been doing practically by rote since he was old enough to toddle. He didn’t really think too deeply about it; it was just something that was part of him. He wasn’t sure whether it was something he believed, and it wasn’t something that weighed overly heavily on his mind.

Elio watched the candles flicker for a moment, the warm light from the flame burning into his eyes, before he turned with his drink and sat down on the sofa that took up most of the left side room. Oliver got himself a drink and sat down as well. He hunched his shoulders for a moment as if he was struggling with something, but then he turned to Elio, his eyes searching his face.

‘I meant what I said y’know,’ he said, ‘At Hanukkah. I remember everything.’

Elio chewed his lip for a moment, remembering the phone call with distinct clarity, ‘But it didn’t change anything.’

Oliver shook his head, ‘That’s not true; you know that. It changed everything. It meant something.’

‘And yet it meant nothing at all,’ said Elio, looking at Oliver, ‘Did you know, I practically didn’t get out of bed at all the November before that? Only when mom forced me. I’d been waiting for you to come back; and you didn’t. You never came back. November was when I stopped hoping. And then I heard your voice at Hanukkah…’

Oliver looked wounded at the thought of his suffering, ‘I wanted to. I thought about it. For a very long time; I thought about it. Do you hate me for it?’

Elio took a sip of his drink, watching the candles, and then shook his head, ‘No. No I don’t. I could never hate you Oliver. I figured that you couldn’t; you had a life over here, a life that went on before, and would go on after me.’

‘But had changed so much after you,’ said Oliver, his voice soft, ‘I remember standing in the room in Rome, after San Clemente. You were still asleep and I was looking at you; you looked so very beautiful. In that moment I wanted to throw everything away; just to stay, to be with you, to lie down with you in that bed and never part from you again. But you were just seventeen. I couldn’t ask you to do that. As you’d said to me before; you knew nothing. I couldn’t ask you to make a decision based on that.’

‘I would’ve come with you in a heartbeat,’ said Elio softly, ‘You just needed to ask.’

Oliver nodded, ‘I figured. But what would that have done to your parents? To Marzia and the others? To Vimini?’

Elio looked down at his hands, ‘I know.’

Oliver had come slightly closer, their knees were touching, Elio could feel the shape of the bone through his jeans ‘If it had just been us, know that I would’ve done it in a heartbeat also.’

‘But it never is,’ said Elio, his eyes never leaving Oliver’s face, ‘It’s never just two people. There’s always more.’

Oliver didn’t reply, his tongue darting out to wet his bottom lip. Elio watched his mouth, remembering his dream from the nights before, when that tongue had been doing other sinful things to him. He tried not to let his mind stray too far down that road now. Oliver had seen his eyes dart to his mouth. There was a pause as they regarded each other for a moment, just watching. Elio could see the reflection of the candles in Oliver’s pupils.

‘Can I kiss you Elio?’ said Oliver, his voice low.

Elio was immediately transported back to a warm night in Italy, when Oliver had asked him the exact same question. He didn’t need to think any more than that.

‘Yes please’ he breathed; the answer he had given then. His life had changed irrevocably that night. It couldn’t change in the same way again, but he would give anything to feel Oliver’s lips on his again; just to remember what the dream tasted like.

Then he didn’t have to wait anymore, and that firm mouth was on his once again. Elio felt like his heart might just hammer out of his chest; Oliver tasted just the way he remembered, of cigarettes, warmth, breath mints, and now – because they just eaten – the undertone of the Thai curry. Elio found it intoxicating. He brought his free hand to the base of Oliver’s neck, fingers curling into the blond hair there, as Oliver’s tongue licked at his top lip. Elio sighed, his lips parting slightly as Oliver deepened the kiss, pulling him closer towards him, hands on his waist, the sheer size of him reminding Elio of the way his body felt around his, on top of his, and – for that one time – under his. Elio heard a clink as Oliver put his glass down, and he had just the presence of mind to do the same, cupping Oliver’s jaw with his now free hands, feeling the stubble of a day’s growth under his fingers. Elio gasped as Oliver’s mouth found his way down to his neck, sucking at the soft and sensitive flesh there; his five o’clock shadow scratching at the skin. Elio’s head tipped back to give the blond man more access to the white column of his throat. His eyes snapped open as Oliver bit gently at his skin, bringing blood to the surface.

And then Elio froze.

Oliver noticed about half a second later, breaking away and looking at him. His hair was slightly messed up from where Elio had been tugging at it, and his lips were cherry pink and just beginning to swell.

‘What is it?’ said Oliver, slightly breathlessly. Elio felt like he wanted to cry in that moment; Oliver looked so heartbreakingly beautiful. But Elio wasn’t ready for this; for what doing this would do to him.

Elio shook his head, ‘I can’t do this. I’m sorry.’

He extracted himself from Oliver’s arms, despite part of him wanting to do nothing more than stay there.

‘I’ve got to go. I can’t do this again,’ he repeated, almost to himself, as he grabbed his jacket from the back of the sofa, ‘Thank you for dinner.’

He didn’t wait for Oliver to respond, as he practically ran towards the door, and threw himself out into the corridor. He had to leave before he couldn’t; before he melted back into those arms, only to realise that he couldn’t stay there, that he would have to leave before the morning light. He hurried down the stairs and out onto the street. He didn’t look back up at the window to see whether Oliver was watching him. He didn’t want to see that his was, those shocked and hurt eyes breaking his resolve; equally he didn’t want to see that he wasn’t, that he hadn’t risen from the sofa to try and stop him from leaving.

He quickly hailed down a cab and got in, blurting out the address to the driver, before he threw his head back against the headrest and groaned in anger at himself. His heart was pounding, his lips were swollen, and the beginnings of the erection in his pants told him that he definitely did want this.

But it didn’t matter; he couldn’t.

**

Elio ran up the stairs to the flat, taking them two at a time, his feet thudding heavily on them, and then nearly ran into Teddy and Zoe who were on their way out. They both looked as if they had been drinking already.

‘Whoa! Hey Elio,’ said Zoe, after she had recovered from nearly being bowled over, ‘You alright?’

Elio nodded tight-lipped, not trusting himself to speak right at that moment.

‘We were just heading out. Do you want to come with us?’ asked Teddy, ‘You look like you could do with unwinding.’

‘Uh yeah, actually,’ said Elio after a heartbeat, ‘I’d like that. Where are you headed?’

‘Danceteria,’ said Zoe with a grin, ‘You will probably need some fake ID to get in though. Have you got some?’

‘Give me five seconds,’ said Elio, ‘There’s some on my bedside table.’

Zoe agreed, and Elio hurtled inside to grab his stuff. He was glad he’d run into them; he could do with going to let off some steam. He’d heard of Danceteria before, but only in passing, and had no real idea what it was like. Within moments he was back with Zoe and Teddy and ready to go.

‘It’s a bit of a taxi journey,’ said Teddy. Elio shrugged and fished out a note or two from his wallet, before passing them to Teddy. He realised that this went against everything he should be doing tonight, but as his mother wasn’t around, he didn’t think it would be all that much of a problem.

‘For the ride,’ he said, as Teddy looked surprised. Elio shoved his wallet back into his jeans; he had plenty of money with him.

‘Are you sure you’re okay?’ asked Zoe, looking at him curiously as they stepped out of the flat, now fully dark as night had completely descended about half an hour ago.

‘Yeah,’ said Elio, ‘Just a bit wound up. It’s been quite a day.’

Teddy smirked at Zoe and then at him, ‘When we get to the club; I’ve got just the thing.’

Zoe looked at Teddy, a small furrow appearing on her brow, ‘Are you sure that’s a good idea?’

‘Well, only if Elio wants to,’ said Teddy as he hailed a cab. Elio had no idea what they were talking about, so he just got into the backseat of the cab with them, as Teddy gave the cabby directions.

‘We didn’t see you this evening,’ said Zoe, ‘Where’ve you been?’

‘I just went out,’ said Elio with a shrug, ‘Decided to explore a bit,’

Zoe could see that he wasn’t telling the whole truth, but decided not to pry, for which Elio was entirely grateful. She had some form of glitter in her hair, and stripes of glitter on her face. Clearly there were in for quite a party tonight. Thank god it was Saturday tomorrow and he didn’t have classes.

They arrived at the club about twenty minutes later and piled out, thanking the cabby. The place was full of bodies; girls in short dresses, and boys in tights jeans. All of them looked fucking beautiful as far as Elio was concerned, and he was sure that most of them would make for a beautiful fuck. With the blood surging around his veins the way it was he was almost certain that that was what he needed. The queue was already quite long, but it was moving relatively fast. Elio felt distinctly underdressed compared to some of the people standing in the line. Once they reached the back, Elio leaned heavily against the wall, his heart still felt like it was beating out of his chest. He felt like he hadn’t stopped running since he’d left Oliver’s; despite being sat in the back of the cab for a while.

‘Here,’ said Teddy quietly, ‘This’ll chill you out a bit.’

He reached into his pocket and brought out a very small bag with white powder in it. Elio looked down at it, a bit confused.

‘What is it?’ said Elio, clearly having some idea as to what it probably contained.

‘It’s alright,’ said Teddy, ‘My local friendly pharmacologist cooks it up for me. It’s perfectly safe.’

‘That doesn’t answer my question,’ said Elio with a grin, not entirely put off.

‘It’s MDMA,’ said Teddy quietly, ‘It’ll take your mind off things.’

Elio looked at the powder for a moment, and then back at Teddy.

‘Here,’ said Zoe, licking her finger and sticking it into the bag, before sucking the white stuff off her finger. She pulled a face after a moment.

‘It tastes fucking gross, but it does the trick.’ she said with a giggle.

Elio watched her confidence, and then copied her. She was right; it was fucking disgusting. It was very bitter, and the taste stayed in the back of his nose, but he managed to swallow most of it, licking the remnants off his finger tip. He grimaced as he tried to get the taste out of his mouth; taking the stick of gum Zoe offered him as a glad alternative. Teddy took some as well, and then tucked the bag down the side of his boot. There wasn’t much left; but he didn’t want to waste it. Elio wondered how long it would take for the drugs to hit.

The queue wound its way towards the door. The bouncer didn’t even bother asking them for ID; clearly, he didn’t give that much of a shit. Inside it was a deafening cacophony of noise and blinding flashing lights in all directions. Elio couldn’t even begin to think what the song was, but it didn’t matter as the drugs flooded his system, and he instantly felt so relaxed. His limbs felt heavy and chilled out, and he knew that he was grinning like a maniac. He immediately lost sight of Zoe and Teddy but it didn’t matter. He went and found the nearest big dancefloor, flinging himself into the wall of sound that had almost become a visual entity to him, a pulsating mass of colours and noises. He felt himself get lost in the music, both aware of the people around him, but also blissfully alone. Nobody here would hurt him; they were all there for the same reason, to dance and to love.

This is what he needed. To lose himself in the beat and amongst all these people he didn’t know. Time seemed to slow down and speed up. He had no idea how long he was dancing for; but surely it was hours. All he was aware of was the rhythms flowing through his body, and the hands on his hips. He leaned into the touch, resting his head on the shoulder of the person behind him. He’d spotted them vaguely, noting the tall stature of the dancer, and the strong arms around him. He didn’t try and break away, instead letting them continuing dancing with him as the songs melted together, sweat slicking up the side of his neck.

Elio could feel the man grinding into his hips behind, letting Elio feel his cock against his butt, and he couldn’t help but grind back. He turned into the person, looking up at their face. Brown hair, brown eyes and a mellow smile. Elio put his hand on their hips, pulling them close. He was feeling utterly relaxed and wanted to feel the touch of the other person. The guy leaned in, nibble lightly on Elio’s ear, kissing at the soft skin on the side of his neck. Elio had always been super sensitive on his neck. He swayed his hips with the other man, running his hands down his back and his butt, pulling him into his body, grinding their hips together. Everything had come down to the way the man’s clothes felt under his fingers; rough and smooth, soft and hard in all the right places.

Elio could feel his body was acting independently of his mind as he trailed his hand down the body of the man in front of him, resting his hand on the front of his jeans, feeling the half-hard cock under his palm. He glanced up into the man’s eyes, a smile playing on his face. He knew what he was asking for, and if he was going to get it from this man, then he would be delighted.

The man grabbed his hand, and within moments he was outside the club, being pulled along the road. He had no idea where they were going, and he didn’t really care. The drugs were making him not care; along with the alcohol that he’d drunk earlier. He wasn’t thinking about safe or not safe, about right or wrong; it was just about being, right there and right then.

Elio’s vision was blurred as they went up a flight of stairs and into a roomy apartment. He was pushed against the door and the man kissed him roughly, biting his bottom lip as his hands went to the buttons of Elio’s shirt. When the man had pulled it open, his warm hands were on Elio’s chest, and he arched into the touch, loving the way the rough hands felt on his delicate skin.

‘I want you to fuck me,’ the man breathed against his ear, his legs either side of Elio’s. That was unexpected; he definitely hadn’t thought that was the vibe he was getting from the man currently sucking at his neck. Elio had definitely thought that he was a top. Elio grinned. He didn’t care; he just wanted a fuck. Elio grabbed the front of the guy’s jacket lapels and turned them around – shoving him up against the door, and beginning to tear at his clothes. His arms felt heavy as he tugged the guy towards him by the belt loops, crashing his lips upon his. Elio kicked off his shoes as he kissed the man deeply, his hands pulling at his hair.

‘Bedroom?’ he huffed as he flicked the button on his jeans and pulled down the zip, palming at the man’s cock through his boxers, causing him to rock his hips into Elio’s hand. The stranger was now fully hard, and Elio could feel the wetness from the head of his cock against his palm.

The guy tugged him through a door on the left, and they both fell onto a large double bed that literally took up the entire room, just inside the door. Elio pulled the rest of the guy’s clothes off, quickly followed by his own opened shirt and jeans. The stranger’s body was tight and lean, with muscles in the places where Elio liked to see them.

‘Lube?’ Elio asked as he mouthed down the guy’s chest, biting slightly, stroking the guy’s cock at the same time, causing the guy to moan and arch up as he did so. The guy reached under the corner of the mattress, before shoving a tube in Elio’s direction. Elio grinned against the guy’s hot skin, before he flipped him over onto his front, pulling his hips up so he was on his hands and knees. Elio traced his fingers down his spine, before using the lube to prepare the man in front of him. It had been a few months since he had been with a man, but it wasn’t hard to remember exactly what to do. As he crooked his fingers up inside of him, the man nearly fell onto his forearms as he huffed out a moan. Elio smiled, as he gently rubbed at that spot again, causing the man underneath to swear softly under his breath; begging Elio to fuck him. Elio quickly got a condom out of his own jeans pocket and slid it on his rock-hard cock. He used the lube to slick up a little more before lining up enter the body in front of him.  

He was tight; so tight. He groaned as Elio bottomed out inside of him, and Elio’s mind was blown. With the drugs, and the feeling of the tight heat around him made his eyes roll back in his head. It felt incredible to his spaced-out brain, and he moaned as he began to fuck the body in front of him, slowly sliding in and out of the tightness.

‘ _Fuck_ ,’ hissed the man, ‘Please, _harder_ ’

Elio was only too happy to oblige, snapping his hips, aiming for that spot that would make the man see stars. The wonderful pressure around his cock had Elio panting out his pleasure, his hair sticking to his face with sweat; both from the club and from the fuck. Elio bit at his bottom lip, a moan escaping as the man fucked back into him.

Elio could feel the pressure beginning to build in the pit of his stomach, he bit his lip as he grabbed the hips of the man in front of him, digging in his fingers, probably leaving bruises. But it didn’t matter; all that mattered was the finish for them both. Elio groaned, reaching around the guy, quickly jerking him off, his hand fast around his cock as he fucked him, the precome leaking from the guy’s cock acting as lube as he stroked. Elio’s mind was short-circuiting as the man underneath came; swearing and tightening around him, and Elio couldn’t help but follow. His hips jerked forward as he came, thrusting once, twice, thrice as the pleasure rushed around his body.

He fell to the side; his body feeling boneless. He pinched at the condom to stop it sliding off as he moved. Elio sat up a few seconds later, tied it off, and looked for the bin, tossing it away. He looked down at the man still lying face down on the covers, a happy sated smile on his face, and his eyes were closed. Elio didn’t need say anything else, or do anything. This was a fuck. A chance for both of them to have a damn good orgasm; that was all.

Elio reached for his clothes and pulled them on, finding his wallet and the cigarettes from earlier still in his jeans pocket. He found his shoes by the door, and pulled them on. The guy still hadn’t moved; he was probably asleep by now, but it didn’t matter.

Elio left, reached for a cigarette in his pocket; lit it, and headed out into the night. He had no idea where the fuck he was; and with the drugs still floating around his system he doubted that he’d be able to find out. He didn’t fucking care at this point; he hailed a cab, and managed to just about slur out the address of the flat, before flopping back against the seat as the taxi drove away.


	8. Face The Horizon

Elio lost most of that weekend to sleep. The whole of Saturday he spent face down in his pillow, unaware of much, besides when the dust cart decided to pull up and empty the bins along the road; setting the bottles crashing into the huge bins, dragging him out of his deep sleep for a while. It didn't last too long though, thankfully. He had the odd dream about a blond man, holding Elio close to him, and promising him things that Elio wasn’t sure whether he believed or not. He wanted to believe him. Oh so badly he did. And he saw the pain in the blond man’s eyes as he took in the hesitation and doubt in Elio’s. He could see the man wanted to hold him, to look after him, but Elio wasn’t sure whether or not to let him. Then he rolled over and fell into blissful dreamlessness.

Elio only emerged from his room to go to the bathroom, get food, get water, and then disappeared to go back to bed. Alana laughed when she saw him in the kitchen at some point in the afternoon, telling him that he looked like he’d been dragged through a dustbin backwards. Elio certainly felt like it. The sunlight hurt his eyes, he’d drawn the curtains in his room to keep in a cocoon of darkness, and his mouth felt like the bottom of a budgie’s cage. He just wanted to sleep until he felt better. Apparently alcohol was bad enough, but add drugs into that mix and you had a really bad concoction. Elio vaguely wondered how Teddy and Zoe were feeling.

He awoke again sometime on Sunday morning, and spent most of that day rehydrating and doing the reading he needed for the week ahead. He definitely felt better on Sunday than he had on Saturday. He didn’t really know what had come over him on Friday night; he’d just gone completely wild, something like he felt he needed to do. Seeing Oliver had just brought out this recklessness in him; it felt like he both wanted to run towards the man, and also run as fast as he could in the other direction. He needed that feeling he got when he was close to Oliver; but at the same time, he was terrified of what it did to him. He was like a junkie who was all too aware of his habit. He felt torn about what to do; and he didn’t really know who to turn to to discuss it. He hadn’t told any of his flatmates about his sexuality; although he figured that it would be a difficult conversation to have – he wasn’t gay. He didn’t exclusively like guys, just like he didn’t exclusively like girls. He just liked people; and if he thought they were attractive, warm, funny, and intelligent, then he would be drawn to them like moths to a flame. The problem is, the last time he got close to Oliver, his wings were badly burnt. He didn’t really know what that was called.

Then the second week of classes started in earnest, and Elio felt like there was a step up even from just last week. He had his first seminars. These were different from lectures in that there were a lot less people in them, and were usually led by a younger academic, one who was studying under the professor who’d given the lecture. They usually spent most of the time talking through that week’s books and lectures, trying to figure out what the main theme was, and then debating around it. Elio’s European Literature seminar had about eight other people in it. Elio was sat next to a girl, whose name he learned was Rory. She was from the Midwest, and when Elio asked further, she said her home was near St Louis. He didn’t ask any further because he had only the vaguest idea where St Louis was, so any more detailed would be pointless.

The seminar passed with Elio mostly listening, only speaking when the tutor asked him a direct question, or if he vehemently disagreed with something that one of the others was saying. There was one guy who seemed to have an opinion on _everything_ , and they did necessarily agree with each other, which Elio thought was confusing. He clearly hadn’t thought his arguments through overly well. At the end of the class the tutor spent some time discussing the assignments they would be set. They’d have one marked essay for each of their four classes this semester, although they were more than welcome to submit other essays for extra credit. It wasn’t compulsory, however. Next semester they would have two weighted essays for both, and exams at the end of the year. Elio saw a few of his fellow students grimace or groan at the news, but he didn’t mind too much; he guessed that this was what they were really here for after all. His favourite class was definitely European Literature at the moment. He liked English Lit, but he found that when exploring different authors outside of the English-language, it gave a wider perspective and a more nuanced view. It helped that he could also read the French and Italian authors in the original, rather than having to rely on the translation like most of the other students.

He exited the class with Rory at the hour mark, and they headed off down the stairs. Elio couldn’t help but flick a glance towards the higher levels, knowing that on the eighth floor, the Classics department – and its academics – resided. He wondered if Oliver was up there, or whether he was teaching elsewhere at the moment.

‘Have you got another class now?’ Rory asked him as they descended, pulling him out of his thoughts.

‘No,’ said Elio, ‘That was my only one today.’

‘Cool,’ said Rory, ‘Do you wanna go explore the city a bit? I mean, totally cool if you’ve got something else to do…’

She trailed off, but Elio grinned to ease her awkwardness, ‘That would be great. I’ve not really had a chance to get out and about much since I’ve been here.’

‘Ace!’ she said, ‘I was just thinking a walk around Harlem Meer or something?’

‘Harlem Meer?’ asked Elio, as they stepped out into the autumn sunshine.

‘It’s at the top end of Central Park,’ said Rory with a shrug, ‘I heard someone saying that it looked pretty at this time of the year.’

‘Sounds good,’ said Elio, ‘Do you know where you’re going then?’

‘South by about five blocks, and then east a bit,’ said Rory with a shrug; ‘I’m sure we’ll find it.’

‘Great,’ said Elio, hitching his backpack further onto his shoulders so he could walk more comfortably.

**

‘So, this is your first time in New York City then?’ asked Rory. They’d reached the park, and grabbed coffee from a vendor, and were now winding their way around the edge of the lake. Rory had been right, it was pretty, with the leaves just beginning to turn on the trees, giving them a slightly golden glow.

‘Yes,’ said Elio, ‘I’ve visited Los Angeles and San Francisco before, and a few cities in the south with my dad, but not here. What about you?’

‘I’ve visited a couple of times,’ said Rory, ‘Sometimes if my mom is feeling particularly extravagant she’ll fly us out here a couple of weeks before Christmas to do the shopping or something. I came here for my 15th birthday as well.’

‘That’s cool,’ said Elio, ‘I bet the city is amazing in the winter.’

‘It’s so beautiful at Christmas-time’ Rory agreed, her voice warming with the memory, ‘Ice-rinks, and lights, and Christmas stalls, and carollers. Quite often they had snow; but it goes mushy really quickly because of the amount of people about.’

‘Sounds nice,’ said Elio with a smile at her enthusiasm.

‘Will you go home for Christmas?’ asked Rory.

Elio nodded, ‘My family don’t celebrate Christmas, but yeah, I’ll go back to Italy for the winter break.’

‘Don’t celebrate Christmas?’ Rory’s mouth dropped open, as if this was the worst thing she could possibly contemplate, ‘Why not?’

Elio giggled slightly at her naivety, ‘I’m Jewish. So I celebrate Hanukkah instead. Although this year it might start before I go home.’

‘Wow,’ said Rory, ‘That’s really interesting. I don’t think I’ve ever met a Jewish person before.’

Elio smirked at her, ‘You probably have. We don’t all wear flashing lights and bells that denote us as Jewish.’

Rory blushed, ‘Yeah sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude.’

‘It’s okay,’ said Elio with a smile, trying to put her at her ease. She seemed really sweet; he didn’t want her to think that he was angry or being quashing.

‘I grew up in a pretty sheltered household,’ said Rory, opening her free palm, as if trying to explain her lack of worldliness.

Elio had figured that much out, but didn’t say anything as Rory continued, ‘My family are quite strict Protestants. If you look up the dictionary definition of WASP, there’s a picture of my mother next to it.’

Elio couldn’t help but laugh at the idea. Oliver had once said the same thing about his mother, but in relation to her strict adherence to her Jewish roots. Oliver had always been more relaxed than that. He wondered whether his wife, _Naomi_ , was strict about her faith. Given what Oliver had told him about her, and the way she’d negotiated their living arrangements with her parents, Elio figured that she was probably just as relaxed as Oliver. Elio mentally slapped himself, trying to stop himself thinking – once again – about Oliver.

 ‘Yeah, so I went to quite a strict school,’ said Rory continuing, allowing Elio to focus on her rather than the tangent his brain had been on, ‘And even when we came here, I was never allowed off on my own.’

‘How did you convince them to let you come to school here?’ asked Elio.

‘My dad’s sister is a bit of a maverick,’ said Rory, ‘She’s always been the black sheep of the family, and I think she convinced them that if they didn’t let me go then I would just go completely off the rails. Which is probably true. I was showing signs of getting in with the wrong people just after high school ended; and I think she convinced them that it was now or never.’

‘Huh,’ said Elio, ‘I find that really interesting. It just seems that the more parents try to control their kids; tell them exactly what they should do, and how to exist, then they’re more likely to do the exact opposite.’

Rory shrugged in agreement, ‘What about you? Your parents not strict?’

Elio chuckled, ‘Not at all. They might advise me not to do something, and then if I did it anyway and it backfired they’d be there to help me out, with a gentle overtone of ‘well we did say so.’’

Rory giggled lightly, ‘That sounds great.’

Elio looked along the path where he could see a group of joggers heading towards them. There was about thirty of them; with the more determined looking joggers at the front, not talking, whilst those who were taking a bit easier toward the back of the group; chatting amiably as they ran.

‘I really should get back into doing some exercise,’ Elio mumbled to himself. He’d swum or run pretty much every day in Italy, whereas it had kind of fallen by the wayside since he’d been here.

‘Hey Elio!’ one of the joggers called out as they approached, waving, and Elio recognised Alana. She was wearing a baseball cap, with her ridiculously long hair tied up in a ponytail, threaded through the back of the cap (not that it really made much difference – the tip of the ponytail still snaked down her back).

‘Hey Alana,’ said Elio as she drew up alongside him and Rory, ‘I didn’t know you jogged.’

‘I used to a bit back at home,’ said Alana, running gently on the spot so she didn’t get a stitch, ‘That and played tennis. I haven’t found the tennis club yet; so I figured I’d go out with the jogging club to try and keep my fitness up.’

‘That’s cool,’ said Elio, ‘Can anyone join?’

‘Yeah!’ said Alana, ‘Why? You wanna come along?’

‘I used to jog back at home,’ said Elio, ‘So yeah, if I could come along to the next one?’

‘Definitely!’ said Alana, ‘Alright, I’ll see you later!’

And with that she was gone; picking up her pace to catch up with the rest of the group who had gone about 100m whilst they’d been talking.

‘Urgh running,’ said Rory, looking after the group.

‘Not your thing?’ asked Elio.

‘Not at all,’ said Rory pulling a face, ‘I like team sports if I have to play at all. The only time you’ll see me running is If something is chasing me.’

Elio laughed, ‘I’ll keep that in mind.’

**

Later that week, Elio found himself with all of his flatmates in the kitchen. They were having a flat meal; this was something that Teddy and Zoe had done within their flat last year, and it was good then, so hoped to do the same this year. Teddy and Zoe had lived with a group of students who were now in their senior year and lived elsewhere. Apparently, it had been something of a tradition for them, and now Zoe and Teddy were continuing it. Elio didn’t mind; it had been decided that every couple of weeks, one of them would cook for all the others. Seeing as they were from all over the place it meant that they got to try other foods as well. Today it was Whitney’s turn. She’d been up for this exercise because it meant she didn’t have to leave her books and studying for too long, but she still got to hang out a bit.

‘What are you cooking?’ asked Teddy as they all sat around the kitchen table, as Whitney worked at the counters behind them.

‘Seafood Chowder,’ said Whitney, not looking back at them, ‘My family used to work the fishing trade in Dublin; my grandfather still does. So seafood has always been a big deal in my house.’

‘Sounds delicious,’ said Zoe. Elio had already helped Whitney peel the potatoes and prepare some of the vegetables that would be going into the meal. He’d been the first to arrive back in the kitchen, so he figured that he would lend a hand.

‘I’ve never really eaten seafood before,’ said Alana.

‘Whhhattt?’ asked Teddy, amazed, looking across at her.

‘Yeah, not really,’ said Alana, ‘It’s just not a big deal in my house. I guess you probably eat more of it on the West Coast?’

‘A bit,’ said Teddy, ‘But not to have had it all?’

‘Well I say that,’ said Alana, ‘I’ve probably eaten a random prawn just by sheer chance or something. But not really by trying.’

‘Well, this will be your introduction then,’ said Whitney from over by the hob, as gorgeous smells drifted over in the direction of the table. Elio smirked a little bit, knowing that he wouldn’t normally get to eat something like this at home. As his mother had said, they were ‘Jews of discretion’, and therefore they didn’t observe strict _kashrut_ (or keeping kosher), although they generally try to adhere to rules whilst maintaining a relaxed social life and table. Elio wasn’t about to stick his nose up at something that Whitney had so kindly cooked for them all.

Elio knew it was his turn to cook for the flat in a fortnight. He’d have to think about what he was going to cook; whether he would go for one of Mafalda’s Italian cooking, or one of his mother’s French recipes. He had a while to figure it out.

‘How you getting on with German, Elio?’ asked Zoe from across the table.

‘It’s good,’ said Elio, ‘I’m finding it fascinating because speaking French, Italian, and then English, I like to see where all the influences come from. So much of English comes from German, but then there’s a lot of Romantic language influence in there as well.’

Zoe nodded, her eyes lighting up as she spoke, ‘It’s what I always found so fascinating about languages. It’s why I chose Spanish and Portuguese. I like to get into the detail of the languages. How can two places; seemingly close together and with similar cultures, have these two different languages? And of course, it’s all the variations in the middle. That’s what interests me the most; the local dialects and differences. But in order to understand all that you’ve got to know the basis of the national languages really well.’

‘Nerd,’ said Teddy under his breath, and then huffed out a gasp as Zoe kicked him under the table. Elio laughed.

‘Oh talking of nerds,’ said Teddy, getting up and going over to his bag in the corner. Zoe looked perplexed as he rootled around his rucksack that he’d just chucked there when he’d come in. Elio’s bag was in the corner as well. He’d been working for a bit on the kitchen table after he’d helped Whitney, and he hadn’t yet been bothered to put it in his room.

‘I’ve got this for you,’ said Teddy, pulling out a book, and handing it to Elio, ‘Oliver gave it to me today – said you’d asked for a copy?’

‘Oliver?’ asked Zoe, as Teddy handed Elio the green book. He didn’t need to look at the title to know what it was. It was Oliver’s book; he hadn’t told him that his father hadn’t got a copy though, so he didn’t know why he’d given a copy to Teddy for him.

‘He’s my classical philosophy lecturer,’ said Teddy in answer to Zoe’s question, ‘Apparently, he’s done work on stuff that Elio’s father worked on. So he’s basically using me as a go between to give Elio stuff!’

‘Oh poor you,’ said Zoe with a smirk.

Elio put the book on the table beside him, where Alana immediately picked it up and read the title aloud, mispronouncing Heraclitus.  

‘I have no idea what the title even means,’ said Alana, putting it down again.

Elio chuckled, ‘Neither do I really. Something to do with logic, and the basis of how it works.’

‘Sounds mind-blowing,’ said Alana.

‘It kind of is,’ said Elio with a shrug, half smiling at the thought of how unbelievably intelligent Oliver was. He felt a weird surge of pride at that thought.

‘Also, Lana, I’m fairly sure it’s Hera- _cly_ -tus’ said Teddy chuckling, ‘Not Hera-clit-us. That’s something very different.’

Alana blushed furiously, as Zoe and Elio burst out laughing.

‘Shut up!’ said Alana, poking her tongue out at Teddy, ‘Just ‘cause I don’t know the names of your fancy pants philosophers…’

‘Alright,’ came Whitney’s voice, interrupting the playful argument before it even really started ‘Dinner’s up! Come and get it!’

‘Smells amazing Whit,’ said Zoe, getting to her feet. There was a pot of the chowder simmering on the stove, and five bowls standing beside it.

Elio stood up to grab some of the food, his stomach rumbling as he breathed in the wonderful smell of the cooking.

‘Thank you, Whitney,’ he said to her, as she took her own portion, ‘It looks delicious.’

‘Well I hope it tastes as good as it smells,’ said Whitney with a grin, as they sat down again. Elio smiled in her direction, before getting caught up in a conversation between Alana and Teddy about midterm elections that were due to be happening in America in the next few months. Elio’s eyes flickered over to the book that was lying on the corner of the table, and he couldn’t help but wonder – what had caused Oliver to send it to him now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everyone who commented on the last chapter! Your comments really do inspire me and keep me writing. Love to all of you; I love chatting with you and making sure that the details in my story are right. It fascinates me that I think I've written one thing but then one of you guys feeds back and makes me think about how I've shaped a particular scene or character; it's so awesome as a writer to get those different perspectives. 
> 
> Please let me know what you think. It means the world to me. :)


	9. Going Under

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I realise that I did only update yesterday, but really this chapter is the second half of that one. It would just have been waaaayyyy too long if it had been one chapter. So, being benevolent, I decided to post this up today rather than Wednesday like I had planned. It does mean, however, that next chapter will not be out until Friday. 
> 
> Also, do not read this chapter at work.
> 
> Your comments really do inspire me and keep me writing. So please let me know what you think. It means the world to me. :) I'm not above begging for comments/feedback. xxx

After finishing his dinner and helping Whit wash up, as well as chatting with the others for a bit, Elio wandered into his room, to do the reading for the history seminar he had the following day. He’d done most of it at the weekend, but he just wanted to look over his notes; they’d be discussing post-colonialist India, and that was something he knew very little about. He wanted to make sure that he had his ideas in order. He was holding Oliver’s book under his arm, as he pushed open the door to his room, and moved over to his bedside table to flick his light on. He glanced at the front of the book that Oliver had sent via Teddy; re-reading the title once again, remembering Oliver beating himself up over the contents last summer. Elio wondered whether he would ever write a book of his own; it seemed to be such an amazing feat. No offence to Oliver intended, but he had no intention of reading the book right right now.

Elio chucked the book towards his desk, hoping it would land on the wooden surface, but then turned as the pages fluttered and several seemed to come loose, scattering on to the floor.

‘Shit,’ said Elio, crouching down to pick up the pages, he couldn’t give his father a damaged copy. As he gathered up the pages he realised that they weren’t printed; but they were the same paper as the rest of the book, in order to make them blend in. Elio realised that there was writing on two of the pages, and he immediately recognised Oliver’s relaxed hand; again written in pencil, just like the note from last week. Were these notes that Oliver had left tucked inside, meaning to take them out before he gave the book to anyone? Was this his personal copy that he used when preparing seminar reading or a lecture? Elio couldn’t help himself, he sat down on the floor, to read whatever it was that Oliver had written.

It quickly became clear that they weren’t notes to do with the book.

_Elio,_

_I’m sorry to contact you like this; but I had no real idea how to do it in an unobvious way. I needed to make sure that you saw this, to say that I need to see you. I loved spending time with you on Friday night; and I couldn’t begin to properly explain how it made me feel to sit with you once again, to talk to you. To feel your body close to mine. I felt a lightness that I have not felt in months, and it reminded me of the hole that I’d filled in with makeshift material since I left last summer; trying to make myself not feel that emptiness that was there after I left._

_I don’t think I can live in the same city as you, without trying to tell you these things. You make me feel something that I have never felt for anyone before; and I believe you might feel some of that too, and know why it is difficult for me to explain how I feel. Not that expressing my feelings has been my strong point. I wanted to turn back so much that day; I can’t even begin to express the level of my regret._

_It hurt me so much when you ran out on Friday; but I know why you did it; doing this is like asking for the fire to swallow us whole. Everything is there when you are near me – there is no hiding anything. It’s terrifying. It has been like seeing a ghost again. But if it means I’m going to be seeing ghosts everywhere, then I need to do it again and again and again. I have to see you._

_Oliver._

Underneath was his apartment address, and a six-digit code for the outside apartment door.

Elio thought he may have stopped breathing for a moment. He felt like his throat had constricted to the point where no oxygen could pass. He sat for a few seconds longer, his eyes once again scanning the letter. Reality had not changed in the slightest since last Friday, and yet now, everything was different.

Then he was up on his feet, nearly hitting his head on the wardrobe door handle due to the speed which he moved. He grabbed his keys off his desk and his wallet. He stuffed the letter into his jeans pocket, so that he wouldn’t forget the address, and then exited the his room, not bothering to lock the door behind him.

‘Bit late to be going out, isn’t it?’ asked Zoe as she came out of the bathroom, her hair wrapped up in a towel, ‘Do you need someone to go with you? It’s not exactly super safe at night.’

Elio glanced at his watch; it was heading towards eleven at night, but he shook his head, ‘I’ll be alright. Thanks though.’

Zoe nodded, looking at him curiously. Elio smiled in what he hoped was a convincingly relaxed manner, before he left the flat and headed out on to the street.

He ran down two streets before hailing a cab, and gave the driver the address at the bottom of the letter. Elio’s mind was racing as the taxi picked its way through the streets and traffic lights; he didn’t really know what he was doing. He just felt like he was obeying something almost primal within him. He had a brief doubt cross his mind. What if Oliver didn’t mean now, when he’d said _I have to see you_? What if he meant in his office; during school hours? What if he meant at a coffee shop or something? Elio’s mind battled that particular thought because why would Oliver have put his address and apartment code if he meant outside of his home? Either way, Elio’s mind was racing as he tried to rationalise what was going on.

He didn’t have much time to do so, as the taxi pulled up in front of the apartment building. Elio opened the door, paid the driver, and stood for a moment on the street. A man wearing a grocery bag on his head passed him in the opposite direction, shoving him out of the way as he dithered on the curb. Elio didn’t say anything; he didn’t want to start a fight. One that he was almost certain he wouldn’t win.

He punched in the code to the building that Oliver had written on the bottom of the letter, sighing in relief as the lock on the door clicked to let him in. The door slammed behind him, and he flinched momentarily. He headed for the stairs and went up to the floor when he’d been only last week. He felt like he was being propelled along, his body moving outside of the control of his brain.

He didn’t care.

He stopped in front of the door that he had barrelled out of on Friday, only at this moment pausing for more than half a second. Then he raised his hand, and knocked on the blue painted front door.

There was no answer for a moment or two; but then Elio heard a noise on the other side, and the slide of a door lock. Elio’s heart was hammering.

Then the door opened a crack, stopped by the chain on the other side, and a searing blue eye appeared in the gap. The eye widened as its owner spotted Elio, shut the door and slid the chain back. The door opened fully, and Elio eyes drank in the vision in front of him. It was clear that Oliver had been sleeping on his sofa; his hair was messed up and his eyes looked as if they were chasing away sleep.

‘Elio…’ he breathed, looking at him standing in the doorway. Elio shoved his hands in his pockets, instantly feeling slightly self-conscious.

‘I got your letter; and I came straight away,’ said Elio. It was as simple as that. He’d read Oliver’s words and he’d rushed to be here, ‘Sorry, did I wake you?’

Oliver coughed and stepped back away from the doorway, gesturing Elio inside, ‘No, it’s fine. I was just reading when I dozed off.’

Elio nodded as Oliver shut the door behind him; the apartment looked softer than it had the other night. The blinds over the kitchen window were shut, and the reading lamp was on by the head of the sofa. There was also the smell of green tea in the air and Elio could see the mug that Oliver had been drinking on whilst reading. The book he’d been holding was on the floor, clearly where he’d dropped it when he fell asleep.

‘Did you mean it?’ asked Elio, looking up at him; green eyes looking deep into blue. Oliver ran his hand backwards through his hair, and nodded.

‘Every word,’ said Oliver, his voice low, ‘I couldn’t know that I was only a few blocks from you, and not have tried and tried again to be near you.’

‘And if that had failed?’ asked Elio, hardly believing what he was hearing.

‘I would have tried again. Until you’d told me that you didn’t want it. That I should stop. That you had found someone else,’ said Oliver.

Elio’s mouth was slightly open as Oliver spoke. He couldn’t help it; he stepped forward into Oliver’s space, and tilted his head up towards the blond man. He was utterly terrified, but he didn’t have the energy to fight it anymore.

‘Please,’ he breathed, not entirely sure what he was asking for, but knowing that it involved Oliver taking hold of him, sealing the words in his letter with action.

Oliver didn’t need to be asked twice; he crashed his lips down upon Elio’s, none of the last kiss’ gentleness found this time. Oliver brought his hands to the back of Elio’s neck as he kissed him, as Elio wrapped his arm around the broad body that he’d dreamed of for so many nights. Elio’s mouth fell open as he moaned, as Oliver walked them backwards to the couch. Elio was vaguely aware of Oliver reaching out with one hand to swipe another two books off the surface and onto the floor, before he was virtually lifted off his feet, as Oliver’s body found its way above his, the warm wonderful weight pressing along his form. Elio kicked off his shoes blindly as he wrapped his hands in the blond locks of Oliver’s hair, causing the larger man to moan as he tugged slightly. Oliver’s body was between his thighs as he deepened the kiss, trying to have his lips taste as much of Oliver as was possible in the smallest possible time; Elio felt like he wanted to consume him in his need and hunger.

‘Wait, wait, wait,’ said Oliver, breaking away for a moment. His lips were swollen and his eyes slightly glazed over as he looked down at Elio, whose chest was heaving as if he had just run a race. Elio felt his heart twist in a sickening lurch; _had he changed his mind_?

‘Do you want this?’ asked Oliver, as Elio mewled, instantly relaxing and squirming underneath him slightly, ‘I have to ask – before I go so far that I’m going to find it really hard to stop.’

‘Yes,’ Elio breathed against his mouth, trying to pull him down for another kiss, ‘Yes; I want this’

That was all Oliver needed to hear apparently as he dived to claim Elio’s mouth again. Elio arched up into Oliver’s body, feeling his hard-on through his jeans, causing Oliver to groan slightly, his breath hot against Elio’s lips. Elio ground his hips up again, making Oliver huff against his neck, before biting the exposed skin there.

Oliver rested up on his elbows as one of his hands went for the buttons on Elio’s shirt, a groan of frustration as one got stuck.

‘Come off!’ Oliver huffed against Elio’s neck, causing Elio to giggle slightly, just before the button popped off, clattering onto the floor.

‘Oh shit, sorry,’ said Oliver, but Elio just shook his head, not caring in the slightest.

‘I don’t care,’ Elio said, his hands going down to the hem off Oliver’s t-shirt. He pulled it up and Oliver had to stop kissing him for just a moment in order to get the shirt up off his head. Elio moaned at the sight in front of him, the well-muscled chest, dusted with blond hair. He ran his hands across the taut skin, following his fingers with wet open mouthed kisses.

With that Oliver clearly thought they’d outgrown the sofa, and bodily picked Elio up off the surface, letting him wrap his legs around his hips. Elio used the opportunity to shuck his shirt off his shoulders, letting Oliver plant kisses all over his collarbone as he carried into him the bedroom. Oliver dropped Elio unceremoniously onto the covers, before climbing up between his spread legs. Elio looked down at the beautiful man who was sharing the bed with him as he stopped near his hips and moaned in anticipation as Oliver’s hand went to the button on his jeans, warm weight rested on his cock beneath before opening it and then bending down to use his teeth to undo the zipper. Elio knew his eyes were a mirror of Oliver’s in that they were completely blown with desire. Oliver pulled his jeans down and then Elio kicked them the rest of the way off. Elio reached for him, pulling him up, his hands on the hot skin of his chest, his back. He wanted to touch every part of Oliver again, for his hands to trace the muscled contours in front of him. He could spend years, he thought, simply admiring the form under his hands. He felt like Michelangelo as he witnessed the form of David taking shape.

Elio let out a slight giggle at the juxtaposition between the utter beauty of Oliver’s body, and the reality of sex, as Oliver knelt up and Elio suddenly had deja-vu as the larger man undid his belt and pulled it out of its loops with the cracking noise of leather, before pulling down his trousers, leaving them both in just their boxers. Oliver leaned back down to kiss Elio, and there was a small clinking noise as their necklaces hit each other, a reminder of their shared heritage; another thing that belonged to them. It could have belonged to only them in the world at that moment for the way that Elio felt.

‘Oliver,’ Elio breathed, as he reached down to feel Oliver’s cock through the front of his boxers; the length heavy under his hand. Oliver huffed and ground his hips down as Elio rubbed; a wet spot forming on the material.

‘Oliver,’ Elio repeated, biting gently on Oliver’s ear lobe, ‘I want you inside of me.’

Oliver full on moaned at Elio’s words, grinding his hips down, his lips biting and sucking at the white beauty of Elio’s throat. Then Oliver’s hands were in the waistband of Elio’s boxers, and he pulled them down and off, leaving Elio naked in front of him, only the moonlight from the half-drawn curtains, and light from the street below showing his skin. Elio could have come from the desire in Oliver’s eyes alone; but he held the base of his cock – he wanted this moment to last.

Oliver reached up to the bedside table, and grabbed some lube and condoms. Elio felt a fleeting sense of disappointment at the sight of the condom, but he knew it was only sensible; they trusted each other, but they didn’t know what had happened since they had been in this position over a year ago. It only made sense.

Then Oliver was back between Elio’s legs and none of it mattered as long as he kept touching him like that. Elio draped one leg over Oliver’s shoulder, the back of his knee resting on his shoulder blade; the other was just around his waist. Elio was shamelessly exposed, but it didn’t matter; he trusted Oliver completely, and knew the other man would keep him safe. Oliver’s fingers trailed down his body, stroking the inside of Elio’s thighs, before he grabbed the lube and coated his index and middle fingers. Elio watched him with lustful eyes, his breathing heavy. At Oliver’s first touch, Elio felt like he might fall apart. He tried to focus on the man above him; just to maintain some form of gravity, holding him in place.

‘Elio, fuck, you’re tight,’ said Oliver, as he worked him open with his first finger, using his free hand to stroke Elio’s thigh, keeping him relaxed. Elio bit his lip at the slight discomfort; it had been quite a while since he’d done this, but then Oliver crooked the finger that was inside of him, curling it in what Elio knew was a come-hither gesture, and Elio saw stars. He couldn’t help but arch his back into the touch, reaching to grip the base of his cock as Oliver did it again. Oliver smirked at his reaction, watching as precome leaked from the slit of Elio’s cock; him moaning as Oliver added a second finger, stretching them out, trying to prepare him thoroughly.

‘ _Fuck,’_ Elio breathed, his voice almost coming out as a sob, ‘ _Please Oliver, please fuck me’_

Elio watched as Oliver’s pupils grew; black against the small sliver of blue still visible in his eyes. They were pools of desire as Oliver moved to obey Elio’s command, shoving his own boxers off, tearing the wrapper off a condom and sliding it onto his dick.

‘Ready?’ Oliver asked one last time, as he moved the leg that Elio had had around his waist to his shoulder, bending Elio further, so Elio’s knees were practically by his ears.

Elio didn’t trust himself to speak at this point, as he felt Oliver’s cock brush against his hole; he just nodded. He felt Oliver breach his body and he gasped in discomfort, trying to force himself to relax, and to breathe. Oliver’s cock was a massive adjustment to his fingers; he really should have let him prepare him more, but he just couldn’t wait any longer. Elio needn’t have worried; Oliver was cautious and careful, waiting until he felt Elio relax before he pushed forward. Elio hissed a jolt of pleasure ran through his body, as Oliver’s cock brushed that bundle of nerves inside of him as he bottomed out a few moments later.

‘ _Fuck Elio,_ ’ Oliver mumbled, his mouth against Elio’s calf as he got used to the sensation. Elio pressed forward after a moment, and Oliver knew that it was alright for him to shift.

Oliver began moving his hips, causing Elio’s toes to curl as he brushed his prostate on each pass; building a wonderful tidal wave of pleasure that would soon break. Elio’s hand gripped the back of Oliver’s neck, pulling him down for a sloppy kiss, full of tongue and too much teeth, as Oliver found his rhythm in Elio’s body. Elio could feel an ache in hips, but he didn’t care, he just wanted Oliver to keep fucking him, touching him _there!_

‘Elio,’ breathed Oliver, as his hips snapped forward in a delicious rhythm, ‘You’re so tight. Fuck. You feel amazing.’

Elio would have preened if he could at Oliver’s words, but his brain was a mindless jumble of pleasure, as he reached down his body to stroke his leaking cock. His stomach was tightening; a beautiful pressure building that was destined to explode. Oliver shifted his angle slightly, so rather than simply brushing Elio’s prostate, he was now hitting it dead on with each thrust. Elio thought he might pass out from the sensation.

‘Oliver, I can’t last; I’m gonna cum!’ Elio moaned, ‘Please!’

Oliver nipped at his neck, and batted Elio’s hand away from his cock, instead stroking it himself, in time with the thrusts into his body. Elio could barely think, his mind had closed down to two points in his body; his cock, and his hole, as pleasure flooded every atom of his being. His hips were snapping in time with Oliver’s, as he arched up; his cock brushing against Oliver’s belly. Oliver’s cock hit his prostate again and Elio was gone, body arching up, his mouth falling open with the most delicious curses as he came, painting both his chest and Oliver’s with his release. Elio’s own tightening body caused Oliver to cum seconds later, and Elio could feel the heat of Oliver’s orgasm inside him, despite the condom.

A few moments later Oliver rolled away, letting Elio put his legs down on the cover, and try to regain control of his breathing and of his heartrate. Oliver was back after he’d disposed of the condom; a towel in hand. He gave it to Elio to clean up, and then used it himself, before he fell back onto the covers beside Elio’s still recovering form.

Oliver didn’t speak; instead he drew Elio’s body close to his, so that Elio could rest his head on his chest, listening to his own heartbeat as he slowed down to a regular pace. Elio didn’t ruin the silence either; he just lay there, breathing in the smell of Oliver; drawing closer to the warmth of the other man’s body. He had no idea what they would even of said to each other; but at that very moment, it didn’t matter in the slightest.


	10. Don't Swallow Sea Water

Elio awoke gently the following morning, the sunlight creeping softly through the curtains, only to find that he was in the large double bed alone. The indentation next to him was still warm, so he knew that Oliver couldn’t have gone far. He put his hands out and felt the shape where Oliver had laid throughout the night, holding Elio close to his body. Elio rolled over before sitting up and rubbed his eyes to try and get rid of the sleep. The bed was so comfortable; he didn’t want to leave it. His body ached a little, and as much as he didn’t he like to admit it, his ass was a little sore. It had been a good while since he’d bottomed for anyone. He groaned slightly as he stretched, clicking the vertebrae in his neck. He stood up, and ran his hand backwards through his unruly hair, before heading around the bed and opening the door to the kitchen, leaning against the doorframe.

Oliver had his back to him, and was cooking something on the stove. He was just wearing his boxers, and Elio stood admiring the fine lines of muscle in his back, and the way they moved as he worked.

‘Morning,’ said Elio quietly, after a second or two of just standing there.

Oliver turned towards him, his eyebrows rising as he saw that Elio was completely naked, ‘Well that’s a sight I could get used to. Morning.’

Elio smiled softly, as he felt Oliver’s gaze drift over his body. He didn’t feel in the slightest bit self-conscious as he stood, letting Oliver’s eyes trace his body.

‘I made cheese on toast for breakfast,’ said Oliver after a moment, ‘And coffee.’

‘You didn’t have to do that,’ said Elio, blushing slightly. Oliver waved away his statement with a movement of those strong hands.

‘I’ll just go put something on,’ said Elio, half-turning back towards the bedroom.

‘No, don’t!’ said Oliver quickly, causing Elio to turn back towards him, ‘Stay like that.’

Elio chuckled, and he felt his body react to Oliver’s obvious desire, his cock stirring slightly with a little interest. He moved forward and sat down on the couch, getting a cushion to put over his lap to rest the plate on. Oliver leaned over the back of the couch, and tilted his head up to press a kiss to his lips before passing him a mug of coffee and food. There was something so entirely domestic about that moment, and Elio felt a bubble of pleasure somewhere in his naval as he drank it in. Oliver’s hand lingered on the back of his neck; rubbing at tender spots where shoulder met neck.

‘Thank you for this,’ said Elio, taking a sip of his coffee.

‘Well, I was going to bring it to you in bed, but you beat me to it’ said Oliver, sitting down with his own breakfast. Elio smiled at him as he took a bite of the food.

‘Do you have class today?’ Oliver asked.

‘Yeah,’ said Elio, ‘A history seminar at lunchtime,’

‘Alright,’ said Oliver, ‘Well we can take the subway up towards the university once we’re finished.’

‘I need to go home to change and shower first,’ said Elio, ‘I didn’t bring anything with me when I came over last night.’

‘You don’t regret coming over, do you?’ asked Oliver after a moment, looking at him closely. His foot was jittering up and down as he spoke, as if he were nervous about Elio’s reaction.

Elio shook his head instantly, ‘No. No I don’t.’ 

Oliver nodded, his eyes still not leaving Elio’s face, ‘I meant what I said in the letter. I can’t be in this city, knowing you’re here, and not be near you.’

Elio bit his lip, ‘What does that mean for you?’

Oliver shook his head, ‘I don’t know. I know I’m being _so so_ selfish; but I just can’t be any other way.’

‘Why is it selfish?’ asked Elio, a bit confused, ‘Oliver, I just had one of the best nights of my life. It doesn’t feel selfish to me.’

Oliver paused, looking at him, before speaking, ‘Because I can’t just give you everything. I can’t give you everything you deserve. I couldn’t give it to you then, and I can’t give it to you now. And yet, in my greed, I just had to have. To take. I couldn’t leave it alone.’

Elio breathed out, putting his plate down after he’d finished with it. It might be ridiculous what he was going to say; naïve even. But he didn’t care; Oliver had shown all of himself, whether or not he could do anything about it. It was time for Elio to catch him, to show Oliver that he was safe with him.

‘I’m only nineteen,’ said Elio choosing his words carefully, ‘It’s alright. Whatever you can give me is enough. I am like you; to know that you are in this city and I couldn’t see you would be too much. I need whatever you can give me. I just need to know that I can see you.’

Oliver paused, looking at him with his mouth hanging open very slightly, ‘God, what did I do to deserve you?’

Elio blushed at that statement. Oliver moved closer and kissed him very softly on the mouth, his lips barely grazing over Elio’s. He broke away, but his face was very close to Elio’s.

‘So, we can do this then?’ asked Oliver, ‘And try and figure it out as we go?’

Elio nodded, not entirely sure what he was agreeing to, ‘I’ll be your work-week lover.’

Oliver couldn’t help but crack a smile at that statement, ‘That sounds so playboy.’

‘Well, we didn’t nickname you _il cauboi_ for nothing,’ quipped Elio with a giggle.

Oliver kissed him again, ‘Thank you.’

Elio just shook his head, refusing to see what he was giving Oliver as a gift. It was something that both of them shared; not something that one of them was giving to the other.

‘I need to get dressed,’ said Elio.

Oliver just nodded, watching as he stood up, eyes firmly looking at Elio’s ass.

‘Yes,’ said Oliver, ‘As much as I would like you to be naked in my apartment all day, I do have a ten am lecture to teach.’

Elio giggled, ‘Maybe one day soon I can stay naked in your apartment all day.’

Oliver chuckled, standing up and coming over to envelop Elio into his arms, ‘You can’t speak like that, or I’m never going to want to leave.’

Elio smirked up at him, letting Oliver peck his lips once more, before he disappeared into the bedroom, to gather his clothes together.

**

‘Put that on,’ said Oliver, ‘And then no one will be able to see it’

Oliver had just passed him a jumper from the closest. It was too big for him, but Elio shucked it on anyway, to cover the gap where his shirt didn’t button up because Oliver had managed to pull not one, but _two_ , buttons off in his haste to strip Elio of his clothes the previous night. Once he’d sorted that out, Elio looked relatively reasonable. Nobody would be able to tell that these were the same clothes he’d worn yesterday.

‘We’ll get the subway,’ said Oliver, as he picked up his satchel and slung it over his shoulder. Elio exited first, and Oliver followed him. He locked the door to his apartment and they headed out onto the street. Elio didn’t quite know how to be next to him, but that problem was momentarily solved as Oliver took his hand. It felt incredible to have him hold his hand in public. Yes, it was early, but there was still plenty of New Yorkers walking around, but they didn’t seem to care. Elio was consciously mapping the feeling of Oliver’s hand under his; the lines, and the feel of the skin. He had harder skin on the inside of the first knuckle of his middle finger on his left hand, where over the years of writing excessively, the skin had changed and hardened to be used to the constant rubbing.

They headed down into the subway; which was very busy, people everywhere, trying to get to work or to school. Oliver held tightly onto Elio’s hand as he led him through the crowds of people.

‘ _Faggots_ ’

Elio jumped as a voice hissed the word near him. He glanced around to see who had spoken, but there were so many people about that he had no real idea where the voice had come from. He twisted his hand from Oliver’s, who looked across at him quizzically. Elio just shrugged, as if it were nothing. Clearly Oliver hadn’t heard the slur directed at the pair of them. Oliver grabbed a ticket for Elio, although he said that he probably wouldn’t need it; the likelihood of anyone being able to check everyone’s tickets with this many people about was minimal. Oliver had a yearly pass that allowed him to just hop on and off. Elio figured he should probably get one of those; it would be a lot cheaper than catching taxis if he wanted to go further than a couple of blocks.

A train trundled toward them and a torrent of humanity tried to get on board. He was pushed forward just behind Oliver. They ended up stood up near the opposite doors. It was hot on board, and Elio was glad he didn’t have a bag with him. Oliver looked down at him and reached for his hand again; this time, hidden by the crush of people, Elio let him take it. He wondered if Oliver would let himself be seen with him around the university; surely people there knew he was married? Or was he that much of a private person that he hadn’t really told anyone that?

Luckily, today, he didn’t have to make that decision, as Oliver pulled him off at a stop several before the university.

‘This is the closest stop to where you live I think,’ said Oliver, as they headed up the steps to the sunlit street above. Elio looked about when they reached the top.

‘Yeah; I’m just over that way,’ he said, gesturing, once he recognised where they were, ‘Alright, well, I’ll see you later?’

They hadn’t really discussed how they were going to do this in a practical sense. Everything felt fine when they were at Oliver’s apartment; but in reality, this was going to be much more difficult. Apart from anything else, it would probably be frowned upon if a faculty member was known to be dating a student. Technically it didn’t matter; Elio was an adult, and he wasn’t studying Oliver’s subject, so there wasn’t a conflict of interest there, but it would probably be deemed inappropriate from the school’s perspective.

‘After classes?’ asked Oliver.

‘I have running club tonight,’ said Elio, ‘But I can come by yours tonight?’

‘Running club?’ asked Oliver with a grin.

‘Well yeah,’ said Elio, ‘I used to run all the time; as I’m sure you remember. I want to stay fit, so…’

‘Stay fit!’ said Oliver with a smirk, ‘There’s not an inch on you’

‘Well…’ said Elio grinning, his mind immediately heading in a lewd direction.

‘ _Not_ what I meant’ said Oliver with a chuckle, ‘Running better not get rid of those inches. I happen to be rather fond of those.’

Elio giggled and blushed, ‘Alright, I’m going to go. You better as well, otherwise you’ll be late to teach your first seminar.’

Oliver nodded looking at his watch, ‘Alright. See you this evening then.’

He leaned forward and laid a quick peck on Elio’s lips, before releasing his hand and turning away. Elio couldn’t help but watch him walk away for a second. It was a very nice view after all. After a moment, Elio turned and headed back in the direction of his flat, a slight spring in his step from the lightness he was feeling. Despite the homophobic slur he’d heard on the subway this morning, nothing could kill his mood right at that moment.

**

Elio unlocked the front door and headed up the stairs towards the second floor, opening the door to the flat. There was nobody in the corridor, but as the front door shut behind him and slammed in the frame, Zoe stuck her head out of the kitchen.

‘Ah, the wanderer returns,’ she said with a grin on her face, her eyes sparkling, before disappearing back into the kitchen.

Elio tried to look as innocent as possible as he headed towards the room she was in. She was sitting at the table; reading the morning paper, something which Elio had learned was a habit of hers; ‘What’s up?’

‘Nothing,’ she grinned, looking up at him, ‘But someone was out all last night.’

Elio looked at his feet, wondering if he could plausibly deny it, but then decided he probably wouldn’t get away with that one, ‘How did you know?’

‘Well, some mail came for you this morning, so I knocked on your door to get you to sign for it; but there was no answer. Your bag is still in the corner of the kitchen where you left it before dinner last night. I also saw you go out last night,’ said Zoe, ‘So therefore I surmised that you hadn’t arrived back.’

Elio grinned, before pulling one of the kitchen chairs out and dropping into it, ‘Very astute of you.’

‘Also, that’s not your jumper,’ said Zoe, putting the paper down on the edge of the table, ‘Because it’s the wrong size.’

Elio blushed furiously, ‘You know Zoe, if the languages thing doesn’t work out, you could always go and be a detective.’

Zoe giggled, ‘It doesn’t take a genius to figure when someone’s been out on the pull.’

‘The pull?’ queried Elio, raising an eyebrow at her.

‘Hooking up,’ she said with a shrug, ‘Alright, who is she?’

Elio was momentarily taken aback, forgetting that that would be Zoe’s immediate assumption.

‘Uh,’ said Elio, his mind scrambling out, but drawing a complete blank on all plausible girls names. The only thing he could think of was names from soap operas, and that wouldn’t do at all.

‘Don’t tell me you forgot?’ asked Zoe, cracking a smirk.

‘No!’ said Elio, rubbing the back of his neck, ‘Well it’s just…’

Elio struggled for a moment. He’d never told anyone that he liked guys. Back home it just didn’t matter; you liked who you liked. There was no real need to put a label on it. And it wasn’t like he exclusively liked guys either; he liked girls as well. He’d told Zoe and Teddy about Marzia the night they went to the flat party, so they knew that he used to have a girlfriend.

Zoe was looking at him expectantly.

‘Uh, I went out with a guy last night,’ said Elio, garbling his words in his haste to get them out. Zoe’s eyebrows rose, but she quickly got her facial expression under control.

‘You’re gay?’ she asked him.

‘No!’ said Elio, ‘Well yeah, maybe, a little bit.’

Zoe looked at him confused, ‘What does that mean?’

Elio half wished he’d just managed to make up a girl’s name and make it seem plausible. That would have been a much easier option.

‘Well I like both,’ said Elio with a shrug, trying to be as casual as possible, ‘And I’ve been with both.’

Zoe’s eyebrows rose again, and she nodded, ‘Okay.’

‘Okay?’ asked Elio, wondering what she meant by that.

‘I don’t think I’ve met anybody who likes both before,’ said Zoe with a shrug, ‘But I’ve definitely met gay people before. This is the eighties man! Why should it matter to anyone but you?’

Elio breathed out a sigh of relief, but then his mind flickered back to the guy on the subway, who it clearly had mattered to.

‘So… am I going to get a name?’ teased Zoe.

Elio blushed and shook his head, ‘No… I’m going to keep that bit a secret for now.’

Zoe laughed, ‘Alright, no worries man. I won’t tell anyone else.’

Elio grinned, ‘Thanks Zoe. It’s nice to be able to tell someone.’

‘Do your parents not know?’ she asked, her brow furrowing slightly.

‘They do,’ said Elio, ‘But I’ve never told them. They just _know_ , in the way that parents know most things.’

Zoe nodded, ‘Yeah I know what that’s like. Sometimes it’s like my mum can read my mind.’

Elio got slowly to his feet, feeling as if he’d just had the conversation of a lifetime, ‘Alright, I’m going in the shower.’

‘Do you want me to make you a brew whilst you’re in there?’ asked Zoe, ‘I was just about to make another one.’

‘That would be nice,’ said Elio, ‘Thanks’

With that Elio exited the kitchen and went to grab some stuff to shower with. As he stood in the shower he felt vaguely uncomfortable; had he just come out to Zoe? He’d never really had to do anything like that before, and putting it into words just felt wrong. Whatever he felt for whoever he felt it for was so much more than _gay or straight_. Why did it matter? He signed as he washed his hair; he guessed that he’d have to get used to talking about it though, people would always be interested in other people’s love lives. It was just in their nature. He didn’t really care about what was in other people’s pants, or what they did with whatever was in there, as long as they were legal and having fun. Why should he?

He finished in the bathroom and exited the room. He glanced at his waterproof watch as he walked. It was heading towards eleven in the morning. Oliver would be teaching right now. For a brief moment, Elio regretted not signing up to classics; so that he could see Oliver in his natural environment. He betted that he would be great a teacher.

Elio dressed quickly and headed back into the kitchen where Zoe had made him the promised tea. He thanked her for it, and grabbed his bag from where he’d dumped it the previous night, opened it and retrieved his notes for the seminar today. He’d need to start thinking about what he was going to do for his termly essays soon.

‘The mailman from this morning gave your post to the porter by the way,’ said Zoe, ‘He wouldn’t let me sign for it without you being here. Didn’t trust me apparently.’

‘Where can I find the porter?’ said Elio, ‘I’ll go after classes later.’

‘You know where the accommodation building is?’ asked Zoe, ‘It’s in there.’

Elio vaguely remembered where it was; Teddy having pointed it out to him when they went on a whirlwind tour. He wondered who was sending him post; his parents hadn’t mentioned sending him anything when he was on the phone with them the other day.

He was still reading his notes when the kitchen door opened and Whitney came in, dropping into one of the seats. She looked very pale.

‘You alright Whit?’ asked Zoe, who was working on a translation at the end of the table.

‘Yeah I’m fine,’ said Whit, ‘I just need a cup of tea and a sit down. Just been to my first anatomy demonstrations.’

Elio looked at her nonplussed, ‘What does that mean?’

Whitney got up to make herself a tea, before answering.

‘Well you know that some people donate their bodies to medical science?’ said Whit, ‘Well, some of those bodies go to medical students to examine and practice on. Get used to what everything looks like before they are let loose on real people. So today we were cutting up dead bodies.’

Zoe made a noise of disgust, ‘That sounds gross.’

‘It’s not too bad,’ said Whitney, ‘Like the stuff is really interesting; getting to see where everything goes and what it looks like. It just the _smell_.’

Elio couldn’t even begin to imagine, but he found himself not wanting to.

‘A couple of people fainted,’ said Whitney, ‘But the lecturers said that that was normal.’

Zoe’s mouth was hanging open, ‘That would definitely have been me. I couldn’t even dissect the frog in high school biology. It was just so slimy.’

‘Well these bodies definitely weren’t slimy,’ said Whit, sitting down once she’d finished making her tea, ‘They were just a bit clammy.’

Zoe affected to vomit once again, and even Elio felt a little bit squeamish at the idea. He was so glad he hadn’t decided he wanted to be a doctor or anything like that. Helping people was fine; but organs should definitely stay in the body, and he did not want to be subject to seeing them unless he had to.

‘Alright,’ he said, getting up, ‘Well I’ve got my seminar in a bit. Anyone else heading up?’

Zoe shook her head, ‘Nah, I’ve got to finish this translation for this afternoon.’

‘I’m going to go have a nap I think,’ said Whitney.

Zoe gasped in mock surprise, ‘A medical student; a nap?!’

Whitney giggled, ‘Yeah, they gave us the afternoon lectures off. I guess they figured that we’d all be a bit shaken up after this morning.’

‘Probably’ said Zoe with a grimace.

‘Okay,’ said Elio, ‘See you later guys. I’ve got running club with Alana later, so I’ll be back before then.’

With that he left the kitchen, shoving his notes into his backpack and headed out into the early autumn sunlight of the street below.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who messaged on the last chapter - I'm so glad you liked it! It really means the world to me when you guys give me comments and feedback, and inspires me to keep writing and posting. Comments/feedback are the only type of payment that writers get posting their stories on here, so it really is everything. <3 
> 
> A few notes: 
> 
> \- Zoe giving everyone a lesson there on how not to get someone to come out. Not cool. Don't do it like that. Or at all tbh.   
> \- Do you think I need to put a warning for homophobic/racist language? There will be some more of that in this story - is it something I should warn people about? 
> 
> Also, I have planned out the backbone of this story now and am currently three chapters ahead of myself (hence the reason I'm posting this a day before I said I would - there was no reason not to!). The "plan" (read bullet points) currently runs to 23 chapters, but knowing myself it'll be more than that because I'll have put too many bullet points under each header, and as they expand they'll grow legs and start to walk. So I reckon we're probably looking at between 25-30 chapters - hope you're in for a long read! 
> 
> Anyway, let me know what you thought of this chapter! I welcome conspiracy theories as to where you think I'm going with this! <3 If anyone can guess correctly I might even write them a cameo character into the story - hahaha. 
> 
> Love, 
> 
> V


	11. A Shark In Sheep's Clothing

Elio went to the porters after his seminar and picked up his post. The guy manning the office was annoyed at being disturbed from reading his book, and handed Elio his letter as if it weighed a tonne, after spending about twenty minutes looking for it. Elio smiled and thanked him, trying to not let his annoyance show on his face as he glanced at the letter in his hand. It was international, dictated by the air miles stamp, having come from Europe. It was large and Elio could tell there was a couple of items in the envelope.

He read the letter on the way back to the flat, vaguely looking where he was going as he picked his way along the street. The letter was from Marzia, who’d sent it to him after starting at her university the week before, judging by the date under the return address. It was only one side, but she’d sent him a few postcards with artful pictures of Paris, and also a thin book on the history of Parisian literature. That could come in useful for his essays later this term. Elio smiled as he glanced at the title; Marzia was always unbelievably thoughtful when it came to gifts and keepsakes. His eyes drifted back to the letter.

_Salut mon cher Elio,_

_Ça va?... [she’d continued in French]_

_It is so good to be back in Paris again. It’s been a long time since I was last here. It is so beautiful at this time of the year, with the river winding its way through the centre of the city, and the trees on the banks just beginning to turn. I love it, so much. It’s fantastic for me as an artist; so much inspiration in every direction. I imagine the great masters working in every corner of this great city and it fills me with ideas. Maybe one day I will be counted amongst those names and figures. Ah, I can dream._

_Est-ce que tu apprécies New York? I would love to go there again. I remember visiting with Chiara as a child, but I don’t really recall much, other than central park, and a boat ride on the river. I know university works differently over there, and you get some free choices around subjects? What did you choose other than those that you had already chosen? Here my time here will be divided in Fine Art; I have traditional materials, modern materials, and sculpture. C’est très intéressant mais très très difficile! I’d never really considered trying to work art out of metal before – it’s challenging, but I can see the appeal!_

_How are your flatmates? Mine are all really nice which is quite surprising, considering there’s ten of us living in this apartment! I thought there might be at least one person who I didn’t get on with, but so far everyone seems lovely. One girl does have a habit of labelling absolutely everything (including her teaspoons), as if she thinks we’re going to steal it if she doesn’t; but hey, if that’s the worst I have to deal with, then it’s not so bad._

_You will have to come and visit sometime. I do miss you mon cher. I miss just hanging out with you and listening to you play. We will have to get together when we are back on the same side of the atlantique!_

_I will write again soon, when classes have started properly (we had taster sessions yesterday) and I will undoubtedly be worrying about the amount of work I have to do…_

_Avec tout mon amour,_

_Marzia_

Whilst reading Elio had somehow found his way back to the flat and up to his room without falling flat on his face. He flung his bag on the floor by his desk and toed off his shoes before sitting down heavily on the cover, with Marzia’s letter in his hand. He would reply tomorrow; but would he tell her about Oliver? He’d told her about what had happened last summer, and she’d accepted it with a shrug before continuing on with her life. So very very French. The insouciance of that casual shoulder shrug had bolstered Elio’s confidence in thinking about what had happened with Oliver; if Marzia could know and still want to be around him and have sex with him, then why would everyone else not be the same?

Elio put the letter down on his bedside table, underneath the book he was reading, so that he would be reminded that it was there. He then headed to his desk to start work on the translation from German class that he’d been given a few days ago. He needed to finish it by the day after tomorrow, and if he were going to see Oliver tonight, then he wasn’t sure when he would have the time. At the thought that he would see Oliver later, his stomach gave a little flutter. Elio squished the feeling, and tried to set himself down to concentrate.

There was a knock on his door at just gone six in the evening. Elio had given up on the translation an hour or so previously, and instead was transcribing a piece of music playing in his left ear from his walkman, casually scribbling away. He didn’t have the music too loud; hence the reason he was able to hear the knock. He’d also changed into his shorts and a ratty t-shirt earlier, knowing that he was going out running this evening.  

‘You ready to go?’ came Alana’s voice through it.

‘Yup,’ said Elio, turning the music off and dropping his pencil, ‘Come in! I’m just getting my trainers.’

Alana opened the door and stepped inside. She was wearing her running stuff and had tied up her ridiculously long hair under her baseball cap again.

‘Nice,’ she said, looking around his room, ‘Where did you get the posters?’

Elio saw where her eyes were looking; where he’d tacked up some posters on the wall over his bed, along with a few photographs and postcards from home. He’d stick the postcards that Marzia had sent him up there as well when he got around to it.

‘There’s a record store just down the street a bit,’ said Elio, ‘The posters came from there. The other stuff is from home.’

‘This looks nice,’ said Alana, looking at a tiny postcard near the head of his bed, ‘Where this?’

‘That’s a place called Monet’s Berm near where I live in Italy,’ said Elio, ‘I go there to read.’

‘It looks beautiful, I wish there were places like that near where I lived,’ Alana paused, before turning back to look at him, ‘I really need to decorate my room a bit more. I’ll have a wander to the record shop soon; see if I can find anything I like.’

‘There’s also a gallery along the same road,’ said Elio, as he tied his laces.

‘I don’t think I can afford anything you might find in a gallery!’ Alana giggled.

‘Well they do prints and stuff,’ said Elio with a shrug, standing up, ‘Some of them were pretty cheap.’

‘Oh okay,’ said Alana, ‘Might go check it out then. Are you ready to go?’

‘ _Si_ ,’ said Elio, grabbing his keys off his desk, and a high-necked zip up running sweater. It was starting to get cooler in the evenings, and he didn’t want to get cold after they had been running. They exited Elio’s room and headed out onto the street below.

‘How are you finding classes?’ asked Elio as they walked towards the meet up point.

‘Good,’ said Alana, ‘Really interesting – difficult, but interesting. What about you?’

‘Yeah, same,’ said Elio, ‘There seems to have been a step up even between this week and last!’

‘I noticed that!’ said Alana, ‘I’ve got three worksheets due this week alone!’

‘Urgh,’ said Elio sympathising with her, ‘Thankfully I’ve not got that much; just a translation, but they’ve really started talking about essays and how much time we should be spending in the library.’

Alana nodded as they turned down a side street towards the meet.

‘How many people normally come to these?’ asked Elio.

‘I don’t know to be honest,’ said Alana with a shrug, ‘This is my third time going. There were less people at the one where you saw me, because it was in the middle of the day. The first one had loads; like a hundred people, but I was talking to one of the group leaders and he said that it always drops off as term goes on, and people figure out that there’s other stuff they want to do.’

‘Makes sense’ said Elio, as he spotted a relatively large gathering of people towards the end of the road.

‘Who leads this?’ asked Elio as they got closer.

‘There’s a girl called Victoria,’ said Alana, ‘Who I think is vice-president of the club or something. I don’t think I’ve actually met the president. I’ll go grab her.’

‘Ah okay,’ said Elio, as they joined the group. Alana disappeared momentarily. He felt a little bit like a sore thumb as there were small clumps of people milling about, stretching, jogging on the spot, talking to each other.

‘Hello, Alana just told me you were new!’ a girl with long blonde hair came over to stand in front of Elio, ‘I’m Victoria, but most people call me Tori.’

‘Hi, I’m Elio’ said Elio, taking the hand that she had proffered to him.

‘So the first two runs you go on with us are free,’ said Tori, ‘But then it’s $3 for the semester, which goes towards buying kit for the running team and things like that. Is that okay?’

Elio nodded, ‘Sounds reasonable enough.’

‘Here’s my money Tori,’ said Alana, passing it to the other girl.

‘Thanks Lana,’ she said, putting it into a pouch she was carrying around her neck, ‘Do you need a receipt?’

Alana smiled and shook her head, ‘No, it’s alright. I trust you to remember that I’ve paid.’

Tori smiled, ‘I’m sure I will.’

‘Are we setting off in a moment?’ a guy with black hair had just appeared at Tori’s elbow.

‘Yes,’ said Tori, ‘I’m just finishing up here. Do you want to lead the warm up and we’ll go in a minute?’

The black-haired guy nodded and disappeared, allowing Tori to turn back to Elio.

‘Sorry about that,’ said Tori with an apologetic smile, ‘Have you done much running before?’

Elio nodded, ‘I used to jog every day back at home. Thought I should probably get back into it.’

‘That’s cool,’ said Tori, ‘Maybe after a few sessions you’d like to try out for the team? We have a long distance team and our sprinters; although they tend to train with athletics club when summer comes around.’

Elio shrugged with a smile, ‘We’ll see’

Tori nodded encouragingly, ‘Oh! That reminds me, before I forget. We’ve been asked to give these out to everyone tonight. It’s a new society that’s being set up. They just wanted some publicity for it.’

She reached into her pocket and pulled out a slightly rumpled roll of flyers, one of which she handed to Elio before walking off to join the guy who was leading the warm up. Elio glanced down at the sheet of paper that she had given him.

**AMERICAN TRADITIONALIST SOCIETY**

**CELEBRATING TRADITIONAL AMERICAN VALUES & CULTURE**

**FIRST MEETING: FRIDAY 9PM, BARKER ROOM**

Elio frowned slightly as he looked it. It didn’t really say a lot as to what it was actually about, but he had a small feeling that it wasn’t something that he would particularly like.

‘What the fuck is a traditionalist society?’ asked Alana, peering over his shoulder to look at the flyer.

‘I don’t know really,’ said Elio, ‘Doesn’t sound like something I’d be especially good at, being neither American nor particularly traditionalist.’

Alana giggled, ‘Sounds like something my brother would love.’

Elio shrugged, and shoved in the kangaroo pocket of his hoodie. He’d worry about it later, if it was something he needed to worry about at all. He quickly jogged on the spot and did some jumping jacks, just to get the blood flowing into his legs, before the group set off at a relatively sedate pace towards the park.

**

It was approaching half past nine that night when Elio knocked at Oliver’s door. He wasn’t feeling as nervous as last night when he’d done the same thing, but his heart was still pounding freely in his chest. He looked left and right down the corridor, wondering if anyone had seen him coming or going to this apartment in the past week or so. He’d never seen anyone, but that didn’t mean that they hadn’t seen him.

This time, when he knocked, the door opened fully, to reveal Oliver standing there, a gorgeous smile gracing his face. Elio was momentarily stunned, as the full power of _il muvi star_ shone down upon him.

‘Hello,’ said Oliver, literally pulling him inside, and closing the door behind him. Elio smiled as Oliver leant down and kissed him gently on the lips, his mouth soft and generous against Elio’s own. He broke away after a moment, but didn’t step back to allow Elio any further into the apartment. Instead Elio was trapped between the door and Oliver’s strong body; whose hands were firmly on his hips.  

‘How was running club?’ asked Oliver, still not moving, a small grin playing at his features. Elio could tell that he wasn’t really interested in talking about this, and wondered why he was asking.  

‘Good,’ said Elio, ‘The people who run it seem nice enough.’

‘Oh?’ said Oliver, moving to kiss Elio just under his ear, continuing on down his neck.

‘Yeah,’ said Elio, finding himself not caring over overly much about running club all of a sudden, as Oliver knelt on the floor in front of him.

‘You know…’ Oliver practically purred, ‘I’ve been thinking about tasting you all day. I was sitting in my office thinking about putting my mouth around your cock. I didn’t get to last night; and now it’s all I want to do.’

Elio’s head fell back against the door and he huffed out a breath, as Oliver undid the button and zipper on his jeans, pulling them down to mid-thigh. Oliver ghosted his mouth over the front of his boxers, allowing Elio to feel the warmth over his cock; he moaned as Oliver did it again, his dick hardening without the blond man even really touching him.

Then Oliver gently pulled Elio’s boxers down, allowing his now fully hard cock to spring free. Oliver didn’t do anything momentarily, but just sat back on his haunches, his mouth close to Elio’s cock.

‘ _Please_ ,’ Elio said, looking down into those sparkling blue eyes.

Oliver smirked, leaning in closer and licking his lips, his mouth almost touching Elio’s dick. Elio could see the wetness on the beautiful pink bow of his mouth.

‘Are you going to make me beg?’ Elio whispered.

Oliver moaned, a deep sound from his belly, ‘That would be hot; you begging me to bring you off..?’

Elio’s eyes shut and his head pressed back into the door, as he panted, his desire obvious as it surged through his entire body. Oliver took that moment as Elio shut his eyes to swallow his cock into his throat. Elio’s eyes flew open, and he let out a strangled groan as Oliver’s tongue sinfully worked around him. His brain had completely ceased to be capable of any rational thought as Oliver started bobbing his head, his mouth forming a tight wet vice around Elio’s cock. It felt fucking _incredible._

Oliver’s got his hands pressing Elio’s hips into the door, so he couldn’t thrust into Oliver’s mouth, as much as he would like to. Elio wrapped his hands into Oliver’s hair, tugging slightly on the blond locks as he hummed around him, bobbing up and down Elio’s cock, sucking hard around the head, and then swallowing him deeply again. Oliver hummed around him, the vibrations around his dick feeling intensely amazing. Elio was panting as he tried to stave off his impending orgasm so he could retain this feeling for _just a bit longer_.

‘ _Oliver, god, I’m going to cum,’_ said Elio, as Oliver continued to hum, bobbing and sucking. It was a beautiful sight, as Elio watched his cock disappearing into the sinful pleasure that was Oliver’s mouth. Oliver didn’t stop as Elio writhed and moaned, he gripping Elio’s hips harder, taking him deep into his throat. The softness and the warmth caused Elio to completely lose his mind, and he came hard, shooting into Oliver’s mouth, who swallowed everything.

A moment later, Oliver sat back and then stood up, licking his lips in quite possibly the most erotic gesture Elio had ever seen. Oliver leaned in and kissed him, letting Elio taste himself slightly in Oliver’s mouth.

Elio reached down, pulled up his jeans, and then reached for Oliver, trying to take him into his arms and touch the bulge visible in the front of Oliver’s trousers at the same time.

‘Ah, no wait,’ said Oliver, taking hold of Elio’s hand in his own.

‘What?’ asked Elio, gesturing towards the obvious hard on in Oliver’s pants, ‘Don’t you want-..’

‘Well yeah,’ said Oliver, with a grin, ‘But I didn’t just want to see you to have sex with you. I want to be near you Elio, so I can get to be around _you_ again.’

‘But you-..’

‘I said I’d been thinking about tasting you all day,’ said Oliver, kissing him gently again, ‘Now I have…’

‘And now?’ asked Elio, as Oliver let him actually walk further into the apartment.

‘And now we’ll just hang out,’ said Oliver with a smile, ‘And then later tonight… later tonight I will fuck you, in exactly the way I’m thinking about right now; which involves you with your ankles by your ears, your hole exposed, for me to do exactly as I wish to you.’

Elio’s knees suddenly went all wobbly as Oliver spoke. It was something to feel so utterly _desired_. He sat down heavily on the sofa. Neither of them had ever been retiring about sex; both knowing what they wanted from the other, but hearing Oliver talk like that was intoxicating. There was a beat as Oliver grinned at his reaction before changing the subject.

‘Have you eaten?’ asked Oliver, to which Elio shook his head, ‘I thought we could order take out.’

‘Not since lunchtime,’ said Elio, ‘I didn’t want to eat before running, and afterwards I just came straight here.’

‘Well, we can either order Chinese or Pizza?’ said Oliver.

‘Offering Pizza to an Italian?’ said Elio with a smirk, ‘Brave.’

‘Ah, but this is cheesy-crust deep dish pizza,’ said Oliver with a grin, ‘Bet you didn’t get that back at home?’

‘I have to say that would be a first,’ said Elio, ‘Sounds sinfully good.’

‘It is,’ said Oliver, ‘But you don’t want to have it too often that’s for sure. Definitely not good for the waist line.’

‘I can imagine’ said Elio, shucking his hoodie off, and putting it on the sofa next to him. The folded-up flyer from earlier fell out and onto the floor, causing Elio to bend down and pick it up.

‘What’s that?’ asked Oliver as he dialled the pizza place number.

‘Oh just some flyer for a new society,’ said Elio with a shrug, passing it to Oliver over the back of the couch. Oliver took it but didn’t look at it as the phone connected and he spoke to the guy on the other end to place their order. A minute or so later he hung up, and looked down at the piece of paper in his hand, flicking it open with a thumb.

His expression went hard as he read what was on the page, his eyes scanning the words.

‘What’s up?’ asked Elio, concerned as he registered Oliver’s expression.

‘I didn’t realise that they’d been given the go ahead to form,’ said Oliver, reading the flyer again.

‘Why, what is it?’ said Elio again.

‘You know those posters were saw in the street?’ said Oliver, ‘The New World Order ones?’

Elio nodded, remembering the horrible swooping feeling he’d had when he’d seen the posters.

‘Well this is an offshoot of them,’ said Oliver, ‘As first they weren’t allowed to form at the university, because there were considered to basically be a hate speech organisations. But I see they’ve remodelled themselves.’

Elio looked shocked, ‘That’s awful. Can something not be done?’

Oliver nodded, ‘I tried, along with a few other academics. Particularly when they were still building on the whole _New World Order_ bullshit. But, apparently, with this new brand, they’ve managed to convince the Dean that they’re actually completely okay, and nothing to worry about.’

Elio felt slightly sick. Oliver must have seen the look on his face, because he leaned over the couch and put his arms around Elio’s shoulders.

‘Look, let’s not worry about it now, alright?’ said Oliver, ‘Let’s just eat, and tomorrow we can see what we can do about them? If you want to do anything at all?’

Elio nodded, not really trusting himself to speak. He didn’t really know what _he_ personally could do about it, or even if he should. Was it really his lookout if some far right wing students had decided to set up their own group? Was it something he wanted to be involved in trying to stop? Either way, he felt better with Oliver’s arms around him, his palms gently stroking across his chest as he sat. They’d figure something out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who commented on the last chapter. It keep me writing, it really does. I'm inspired by you guys. Please keep letting me know what you think and giving me your thoughts - it allows me to bounce ideas around my brain. It's amazing. 
> 
> Hope you like this chapter... 
> 
> (Also apologies for my slightly shitty French!)
> 
> With all my love,  
> V  
> xxx


	12. Just Float

‘ _Oh god, Oliver, please!_ ’ Elio pushed his head back into the pillow, his brain complete mush as Oliver continued his ministrations. The blond man was lying between his spread legs on the bed, and had been edging him for what seemed like hours to Elio’s flustered mind. He’d instructed Elio to hold onto the headboard when he’d started, and Elio still had not let go, his knuckles were white with how hard he was holding on; as if that was the only thing staving off his orgasm. He’d probably lost most of the feeling in his fingers by now.

‘Hmmm?’ Oliver asked smiling, the knuckle of his index finger gently tracing around Elio’s hole, his tongue having been there only moments before. Elio could feel the muscles flutter. Each time Elio was close to cumming, Oliver had gently held his balls away from his body and held the base of his cock between forefinger and thumb, effectively preventing him from doing so, until Elio had panted and calmed down enough that he wasn’t about to fall over the edge, and then Oliver continued what he was doing. He must have done that at least four times now, and Elio was getting desperate.

‘ _I need to cum… please…_ ’ Elio whined, looking down at him. His cock was red and throbbing, and his lower stomach was tight with need. He felt like his heart might burst out of his chest.

‘Mmmm,’ growled Oliver, sucking gently on the head of Elio’s dick again before stopping with an obscene popping noise, ‘You begging is pretty much the hottest thing I’ve ever seen, just as I thought…’

‘ _Please,’_ Elio tried again, panting, looking down into the searing blue eyes of the man giving him this pleasurable torture, ‘ _Oliver, I beg you…’_

‘Ask me… properly,’ said Oliver, his eyes sparkling, his hand still moving up and down Elio’s shaft to keep him right on the edge.

Even in his brain-addled state, Elio knew exactly what he meant and garbled out, ‘ _Elio… Elio…. Elio…. please!’_

Oliver couldn’t seem to resist that time, and took Elio’s cock in his mouth, down to the root and into his throat, releasing Elio’s hips, which he had previously been holding flat to the bed with one of his large hands, letting Elio thrust up into his mouth at the same time. With the other hand, he broached Elio’s hole with the lubed finger he had been teasing him with, crooking it upwards in search of his prostate, hitting it dead-on on the first try. If Elio had had enough brain power to think about it, he might have marvelled at Oliver’s incredible lack of gag reflex, and praised his co-ordination of fingering and the _incredible_ blow job, but instead his mind reached a point of total white-out as he came; his eyes forced shut, his body tight, and mouth open as he silently screamed to the room. The freefall of his orgasm seemed to go on and on, rather than the initial rush that he was used to. It pulsed and crested again and again. He was floating on the intensity of the orgasm he was having; his body almost curling in it on itself with the aftershocks as they went through his system. His limbs felt as if they were pinned to the bed; too heavy to even move as his heart hammered under his ribs.

When he opened his eyes his head was on Oliver’s chest, and yet he had no recollection of him moving or how he got there. He glanced down at his body; Oliver had also cleaned him off.

‘Are you okay?’ asked Oliver, his forehead creased as he looked down as he held him.

‘Uh, yeah,’ said Elio, slightly fuzzily, ‘What happened?’

‘Well you seemed to pass out a bit after you came,’ said Oliver, ‘Except your eyes weren’t closed. You were just kind of vacant, your body was seemingly having a continuous orgasm, and then about thirty seconds later you kind of came again, without me even touching you.’

Elio looked up at him, slightly taken aback, but knowing there was a slightly dopey smile on his face, ‘Oh. That’s never happened to me before.’

‘Me either,’ said Oliver, sitting up slightly, ‘Do you want some water?’

Now Elio thought about it, he was kind of thirsty, so he nodded. Oliver passed him a glass of water and he took a decent drink before passing it back so Oliver could set it down.

‘It was pretty intense,’ said Elio, shaking his head like a dog might try to clear water from its ears, ‘Thank you for holding me’

‘I wasn’t going to be going anywhere else,’ said Oliver, ‘I hadn’t intended it to be quite so intense for you, sorry. I didn’t know that would happen.’

‘Don’t apologise,’ said Elio, sitting up and kissing him softly on the mouth, ‘It was incredible. I just didn’t realise I would have that intense-a reaction. I felt like I was flying.’

Oliver looked troubled, so Elio kissed him on the mouth again, trying to assuage his fears, ‘It was amazing.’

‘Just a bit unexpected,’ said Oliver, with the beginnings of a wry smile curling at his lips. Elio smiled and placed gentle kisses on his face in various spots with a loud smacking noise from his lips, until Oliver chuckled and shoved him away.

‘Did you..?’ Elio asked, looking at Oliver’s (now clothed) crotch, the unasked question hanging in the air.

‘Yeah,’ said Oliver, ‘Literally as you did. Watching you come undone is unbelievably sexy. Your body is incredible, Elio. I didn’t even need to touch myself and I was there.’

Elio grinned at the idea of it; that would have been good to see. He rolled over onto his stomach and propped himself up on his arms looking at Oliver.

‘Do you need to do anything today?’ asked Elio, trying to change the subject in case Oliver started to feel guilty again.

‘Well I’ve got marking to do,’ said Oliver pulling a little bit of a face, ‘My post-graduate students handed in an essay earlier this week; but I was doing to do it this weekend when I’ve got some free time.’

Elio nodded, taking in this information, ‘Are you going home this weekend?’

‘Yes,’ said Oliver gently, ‘I didn’t last weekend, because I had a research seminar on the Saturday morning. So I need to go this time.’

‘Alright,’ said Elio quietly, knowing that this was very very expected, and then he banished the thought from his mind, ‘So, what would you like to do today?’

‘I feel like I should be the one asking you that question,’ said Oliver with a grin, ‘I’m the one who knows this city and everything,’

‘Well then, Mr Cosmopolitan,’ said Elio grinning, ‘What would you suggest?’

‘Well,’ said Oliver, his voice mock-serious, ‘I was thinking that we could catch the subway to 72 Street, and have a wander down through the upper east side. There’s some incredible coffee shops and music places down there which I think you’d like. There’s a nice park with a deli just down there which I thought we could go to for late lunch… How does that sound?’

‘Sounds delightful,’ said Elio stretching slightly, ‘And, unlike last time I was here; I do actually have a change of clothes. So, if I may just borrow your shower Mr Cosmopolitan… and then we can be on our way.’

Oliver considered it for half a second, ‘Let’s shower together.’

Elio giggled, getting up off the bed, ‘But I don’t think I can cum again, if that’s what you’re thinking’

Oliver rolled his eyes, ‘Kids these days… no stamina.’

Elio shoved him into the doorpost as he tried to exit the bedroom.

**

‘How did you find this place?’ asked Elio, as they walked down some narrow wooden steps into what was quite possibly the coolest coffee bar he’d ever been into. It was bathed in dark blue light, kind of like an underground cave. This effect was added to by water features, overgrowing plants, and dark furniture.

‘A couple of friends of mine brought me here last year. It’s not just a coffee house, it becomes a bar in the evening. It has an open mic night for classical musicians,’ said Oliver, ‘We came to check it out.’

Elio raised his eyebrows at Oliver who just nodded sagely, ‘Thought you’d like it.’

‘It’s brilliant,’ said Elio, his mind immediately wandering as to what piece he would play if he came here. He wondered if they turned the water off during the open mic, or was it left on to add to the ambience? His eyes wandered to the baby grand on the makeshift stage and he realised it had been weeks since he’d played the piano. It’s not like his playing would suffer too much; he’d been doing it for so long that it was like riding a bike, once he started again it would all be muscle memory. He did half long to go up there and run his hands over the keys again though.

‘What can I get you to drink?’ asked a silver-haired serving girl a few moments after they sat down. There were several other people in the room, sitting in collected groups, or on the sofas in the corner. Elio thought he saw some students from one of the universities or colleges, gathered with some books around the tables. The server was eyeing Elio hopefully as he decided what to have; her eyes raking his slender frame with nothing but appreciation.

‘I’ll have a cappuccino,’ says Elio, ‘Please’

‘And I’ll just have an Americano, no milk’ said Oliver with a smile, ‘Thanks a lot’

The girl smiled and sashayed away. Elio was sure that she was putting more wiggle into her hips than was strictly necessary.

‘She was definitely checking you out,’ said Oliver with a grin.

‘Really?’ asked Elio, sarcastically. He was trying not to draw attention to it.

‘Yeah, if eyes could do undressing, you would definitely be naked right now,’ said Oliver with a grin, taking him at his word.

Elio blushed, ‘Well, unfortunately for her, I’m definitely going through a cock faze at the moment,’

Oliver laughed; a deep belly laugh, ‘Very fortunate for me however. I happen to very grateful for you going through a “cock faze”.’

Elio didn’t say anything, but just raised his eyebrows at his – his what? His boyfriend? His lover? His friend-with-benefits? They hadn’t really discussed what the fuck they were, and he doubted they would be doing that any time soon. They’d only resumed whatever this was earlier this week; yet they couldn’t seem to keep their hands off each other. He didn’t know whether it needed more explanation than that.

‘How are you finding your classes?’ asked Oliver, ‘I mean I’m probably dragging you away from the library or something.’

Elio giggled, ‘Hardly. I always feel like I _should_ be studying, particularly compared to Whit in our flat, who’s always got her nose in a book, but then I always seem to know what’s going on without trying too hard. At the moment at least.’

‘Of course you do,’ said Oliver, ‘I’d be surprised if you didn’t. You’re pretty much the smartest person I’ve ever met.’

Elio squirmed a little, slightly uncomfortable with the praise. He’d been told it before, but it didn’t mean that he got any better at hearing it.

‘Here’s your coffee gentlemen,’ said the server coming back, putting them both down, a napkin folded under each tall glass. She disappeared once more.

Elio nearly dropped the glass when he realised that there was a number written on the napkin in black pen. Oliver saw what he was looking at and did his best to keep a straight face.

‘Don’t say a word,’ said Elio, making a show of putting the napkin in his pocket, knowing that the girl was watching his every move.

‘I won’t,’ said Oliver, still grinning.

‘I mean, it’s as if no one knows of any way to win my affections other than writing me notes,’ said Elio waspishly.

‘Ouch,’ said Oliver, holding his hand to his chest in a mock-wounded pose, ‘Touché’

Elio smirked, taking a sip of his drink.

‘Have you spoken to your parents since you got here?’ asked Oliver.

‘Yes, twice,’ said Elio, ‘They’ve gone back to Milan now.’

‘How are they?’ asked Oliver, his face alight with genuinely fondness.

‘Happy,’ said Elio with a shrug, ‘As ever. Mama has started art classes again, and Papa has cut down on his teaching hours, to focus on the new book he’s writing.’

‘He’s writing another book?’ asked Oliver, his face alight with interest.

‘Yes,’ said Elio, ‘Something about the position of ancient artefacts in modern situations and the paradoxes that creates.’

‘Wow’ said Oliver, ‘Sounds great.’

‘I think it’ll be interesting,’ said Elio, ‘But I’ve heard so much about various classical sculptors over the summer that I think I came to school just to get away.’

Oliver laughed, his gorgeous face relaxed in the crease of his smile, his hand creeping over the table as if to take Elio’s.

‘Hey, Oliver? Is that you?’ Oliver looked around, and jerked his hand back as a man in a grey suit wandered over. He would have looked like any other businessman apart from the fact that he had a ponytail tied into his dark brown hair.

‘Oh, hey Joe,’ said Oliver, ‘Joe, this Elio, he’s a student of mine. Elio, this is Joe – or more correctly Professor Joseph Morton. He works with me in the classics department.’

‘Nice to meet you,’ said Elio quietly, trying to be as unmemorable as possible for the man standing in front of him.

‘What did you do that was so bad to deserve a one-to-one with your teacher?’ asked Joe with a grin, looking at Elio.

‘Oh nothing bad,’ said Oliver mildly, ‘Elio just wanted help with a Greek translation he was working on, so I agreed to help him out.’

Joe looked mildly surprised, ‘That’s cool. I wouldn’t have the first clue what I was looking at, but glad you found the help you needed.’

‘Joe’s specialism is on ancient Sanskrit and pre-Abrahamic languages of the near and middle east,’ explained Oliver to Elio.

‘Wow,’ said Elio, meaning it, ‘That sounds incredibly difficult.’

Joe shrugged, ‘It can be. But then again, I like the challenge.’

‘And also the money,’ said Oliver with a grin, ‘Us Greek scholars are ten a penny, but Joe’s pretty much the only person on the planet who knows so much about Sanskrit.’

Joe laughed, ‘Well, it does have its perks.’

‘What are you doing here?’ asked Oliver.

‘I come here as I walk to the subway,’ said Joe, ‘They do the best coffee this side of fifth, so I come here for my lunchtime fix.’

‘Nice’ said Oliver with a smile.

‘Sir! Your Coffee’s up!’ the silver-haired barista called to the man standing beside their table, who turned as she spoke.

‘Alright Oliver,’ said Joe clapping his hand on Oliver’s shoulder; ‘I’m sure you I’ll see you around the department in a bit. Good to meet you Elio.’

‘Yeah, nice to see you Joe,’ said Oliver, raising a hand in farewell as the man walked off back to the bar, picked his coffee up and disappeared back up the stairs.

Elio could feel his heart hammering under his ribs. It was so strange for someone that Oliver knew to meet him; it felt unbelievable dangerous to the situation that they were in. One slip of the tongue could wreck everything. Elio would now have to remember, if he were ever to run into that Joe character again, that he was Oliver’s student who had an interest in Greek translations.

‘You’re overthinking it,’ said Oliver, looking at Elio’s face and clearly seeing most of his thoughts written there. It’s why Oliver had always been good poker and Elio (on the few occasions that they had played) had been utterly shocking. He just did not have a poker face.

‘What if I bump into him again?’ hissed Elio, ‘Without you?’

‘Don’t worry about it,’ said Oliver, ‘Joe’s a pretty chill guy. He’s also very in demand and probably sees about a hundred students a week. The likelihood of him remembering one student he met one time is pretty slim.’

‘Not sure whether that’s a compliment or not,’ said Elio, slightly peeved at Oliver’s blasé attitude, ‘I guess I’m that forgettable.’

Oliver looked at him, a slight cloud of annoyance in his eyes, ‘Don’t be a child. What did you want me to say? Hi Joe, this is my boyfriend who I’m currently hiding from my wife? Oh yeah, by the way, I’m bisexual, didn’t you know?’

Sufficiently mollified Elio stayed silent. Oliver’s words had magnified the difference in their positions and in what they had at stake. Oliver was risking a lot more in letting Elio back into his life than he was; he could lose his job, his marriage, perhaps even his home and family as well. If this ended, Elio could pick himself back up out of the dust and carry on. It would hurt like fuck, just like it had before, but he figured that he would survive. He knew Oliver was in a difficult position and he was happy that they were able to actually go out in public together. Someone more nervous (or perhaps more cautious) would have insisted that they never meet outside the confines of his apartment. 

Also, he realised, Oliver had just called him his boyfriend. That word hit him like a truck; is that what Oliver saw him as? Elio wondered whether to bring it up, to ask him whether he meant it, or whether it was just a throwaway word to describe a situation that society didn’t generally cater for, and therefore lacked the ability to describe. Society didn’t recognise whatever it was he and Oliver had, so why should it have a word to describe it? He opened his mouth, trying to form the words, but then decided better of it, and took another gulp of his coffee.

A moment later Elio caught Oliver’s eye, ‘That’s the first time you’ve actually told me your sexuality,’

Oliver shrugged, ‘I figured, to you of all people, that it was obvious. That I didn’t need to say it aloud.’

‘You could just have been gay,’ said Elio bluntly.

‘Well now you know,’ said Oliver, ‘Same as you I’m guessing? Considering, from what I understand, you’ve managed to have rather a lot of sex with Marzia?’

Elio nodded, feeling slightly strange that this was the second time he’d _come out_ to someone in as many days, both in suboptimal situations.

‘I just like people,’ said Elio with a shrug, ‘Many of them are beautiful, wonderful, intelligent, and sexy. Why cut yourself off from half of that? I don’t really know whether that’s _bisexuality_ or not.’

Oliver’s eyebrows rose, but he nodded, agreeing with Elio’s sentiment, ‘True I guess. Shame that more people don’t think that way.’

Elio’s mind drifted back to the man on the subway yesterday morning, who had slurred at he and Oliver.

‘Yeah,’ he said a little sadly, drinking the rest of his coffee, and then looked up at Oliver again, ‘Also, I had just the _right amount_ of sex with Marzia, thank you very much.’

Oliver chuckled, ‘Sure you did… I seem to recall last summer you trying to make me feel jealous by telling me all about it one morning over breakfast.’

‘Did not’ said Elio blushing, ‘I was just trying to gauge your reaction.’

‘Uh-huh,’ said Oliver, smiling, ‘Well you soon found out.’

Elio smiled, a genuine smile of memory and warmth, ‘Sure did…’

‘Finished?’ asked Oliver after a moment, swallowing down the rest of his coffee, Elio watching his Adam’s apple as he did so.

‘Yes,’ said Elio, standing up and shucking his rucksack onto his back, ‘Let’s go.’

Oliver led the way up the narrow wooden stairs, ‘We’ll have to come back here in an evening one time; so that you can play.’

‘I’d like that,’ said Elio, as they reached the top. Oliver smiled, looking over at him. There was no one else up here, and as they stepped out onto the street Oliver took Elio’s hand in his and squeezed, not letting go as they headed out into the bright autumnal sunshine. It wasn’t much, but to Elio, in that moment, it was everything.


	13. We Taught You To Swim

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A huge thank you to those who commented on the last chapter, and especially to marz20 who wrote me a beautiful message! It really does mean a lot when you guys let me know what you think and it puts a huge smile on my face for the rest of the day. 
> 
> All the Italian in this was done via google translate, so apologies for any speakers out there if the phrasing is weird! 
> 
> I have updated the tags just to make people aware of the various ways this story will be heading. Just so you're aware. 
> 
> Hope you have a lovely week. 
> 
> V  
> xx

‘I am never going to understand this,’ murmured Alana, her head in her hand as she looked down at the page in front of her, covering in symbols and equations. She was tapping her pencil on the page in a way that Elio could see was fast annoying Rory, although she hadn’t yet said anything.

‘What are you trying to do?’ Elio asked, looking at the complex diagrams in front of Alana.

‘I’m trying to express these equations as molecular diagrams,’ said Alana, ‘But I can’t get my equations to balance when I do.’

‘ _Non ho idea di quello che hair appena detto_ ,’ muttered Elio, forgetting himself for a moment.

‘Yeah, precisely,’ said Alana grinning at him, ‘I agree’

‘How do you know what I just said?’ asked Elio

‘I don’t’ said Alana, ‘But if it was something to do with not understand any of this, then you’re right.’

‘Come here,’ said Whitney, who was also sitting with them, ‘Let’s have a look. It might be that you’ve just been looking at them too long and can’t see where you’re going wrong.’

‘Well at least you understand what she’s trying to do,’ said Rory, glancing at Alana’s work upside down, ‘It could be witchcraft for all I understand about it.’

Elio stretched, his concentration broken. They’d been sitting at this desk in the library for a couple of hours now, and he could definitely of used a break. There were books piled about them, and he currently had two books open on top of one another as he sought out a reference.

‘Right,’ he said, decisively, ‘I’m going on a coffee run. Does anyone want anything?’

‘I’ll come with you,’ said Rory, starting to get up, ‘I need to move.’

‘I’ll have a latte please,’ said Whitney, looking up and smiling at him, ‘Can I pay you when you get back?’

‘Same thanks,’ said Alana, putting her head close to Whitney’s as she started to try and figure out the problem.

‘Alright,’ said Elio, and then turned to Rory, ‘Come on then. Let’s go and grab some coffee; perhaps by the time we get back these two will have figured out the cure for cancer.’

Alana flipped him the bird without even looking at him, which caused him to chuckle.

‘How are you getting on with your essay?’ asked Rory quietly, as they walked down the stairs out of their secluded corner of the library. There were other students in here, although not as many as Elio would have expected for this time in the term. There were several stressed looking Seniors arguing in whispers as to who had a book out first and therefore who should have it next. He could see one of the librarians eyeing them, as if deciding whether they were going to intervene.  

‘Alright,’ said Elio with a shrug, turning back to answer Rory’s question, ‘Although I’m working on my English Literature one at the moment. I decided to give history a bit of a break because I’m not sure I could read any more at the rise of Italian fascism without going a bit nuts.’

Rory giggled as they stepped out in the sunlit quad.

‘There’s a house near us in Italy,’ said Elio, ‘That still has a portrait of Mussolini above the door.’

‘What?’ asked Rory, scandalised, ‘And they haven’t taken it down?’

Elio shrugged, ‘Probably more effort than it’s worth to get up there and do it. The people who own the house must be in their eighties. It’s not doing them any harm.’

‘Yeah, but what must people think?’ said Rory.

‘It’s rural Italy; not that many people would get to see it,’ said Elio, ‘It’s pretty quiet.’

‘Sounds dreamy compared to where I’m from,’ said Rory, ‘Minus the Mussolini portraits of course. Round near ours there’s just wheat fields as far as the eye can see. The bread basket of America.’

‘I suppose that could have its own type of beauty though?’ asked Elio.

‘Hmmm,’ said Rory, ‘Not when you’ve grown up with it and been looking at nothing else for your entire life.’

‘I guess’ said Elio, glancing about this particular area of campus as they walked. It was Sunday, so it was quiet, with not many people about. Rory had asked whether he wanted to go to the library today in the seminar late last week, and knowing that Oliver was going to be away this weekend, he’d agreed. He’d asked whether Whitney and Alana could come too; to which Rory of course had no objections, so they’d ended up finding a table in the back corner, away from the librarians, where they could work, and chat (quietly) as they did so. He wondered what Oliver was doing at the moment, whether he was with his wife, or whether he’d secluded himself away in his study. He pushed the thought aside; he couldn’t know, so therefore it was pointless thinking about it.

As they turned the corner he spotted someone handing out flyers by the door to the coffee shop.

‘Hi there!’ said the guy in a thick mid-western American accent, much like Rory’s Elio was able to appreciate, ‘Have you guys considered joining the new American Traditionalist Society? We just had our first meeting last week and loads of people came down to join us.’

‘Uh,’ said Elio, hoping that his star of David necklace was hidden in his shirt, but not wanting to raise his hand and check, and therefore draw attention to it. He suddenly felt very exposed, which he realised was a slightly silly emotion, the guy in front of him was probably nice enough. Elio vaguely wondered how nice he would be if he knew he was Jewish and he liked to screw guys. Then he realised he’d been standing there, not saying anything, for at least ten seconds, and the guy was looking at him oddly.

‘He’s not American,’ said Rory, coming to his rescue.

‘Oh, that doesn’t matter!’ said the guy with a bright smile, turning towards her instead, although keeping his eye on Elio and the flyer in his direction, ‘Anyone can join, as long as they’re interested in discussing social issues and politics, and are interested in healthy debate about current affairs.’

‘I’m alright thanks,’ said Elio, ‘My timetable is pretty stacked.’

‘Well if you change your mind, our next meeting is this Friday at 6pm!’ said the guy, clapping him on the shoulder, before he turned to try and recruit someone else who was walking behind them. He didn’t even try and hand a flyer to Rory.

‘Why didn’t he try and get you?’ asked Elio, as they entered the coffee shop.

‘Well he wouldn’t, would he?’ asked Rory wryly, ‘One of my flatmates has joined. Asshole if there ever was one. He was talking about that first meeting all of yesterday. Apparently the first talk, and they actually had a speaker for this as well, was whether the Equal Pay Act had actually damaged women’s careers or helped them.’

‘Sounds suspicious,’ said Elio, his eyes narrowing, ‘Why wouldn’t it have helped?’

‘Well that’s the point,’ said Rory, as they stood in the queue behind two other people, ‘Of course is has. It’s an important piece of legislation that helps protect women’s rights in the place of employment, but by framing the debate that way, it makes it seem as if there as a legitimate question about its validity.’

Elio raised his eyebrows, impressed. He’d not taken Rory to be especially political, but clearly he’d not been paying close enough attention.

‘I’ve been listening to my auntie for years now,’ said Rory with a grin, ‘You know, the black sheep feminist lawyer one.’

Elio grinned, ‘She sounds great. What’s her name?’

‘Rachel’ said Rory with a shrug, ‘My mom and her _do not_ get along.’

‘Are they sisters?’ asked Elio, to which Rory shook her head.

‘No, Rachel’s my dad’s sister. So you can imagine what it was like when mom met the in-laws.’

Elio couldn’t help but giggle.

‘What can I get you?’ asked the barista as they reached the front of the queue.

‘Three lattes and an Americano with hot milk to go please,’ said Elio, after Rory told him what she wanted and shoved some change into his palm.

‘Straight up,’ said the server with a smile, and then paused, ‘Oh, by the way, is that guy from that society still trying to recruit people outside?’

‘Yeah,’ said Rory, ‘The American Traditionalist Society?’

‘Yeah that one,’ said the server with a frown, ‘I’ve already told him to move once. I don’t want him outside my coffee shop. It’ll make people think we’re in with their ideas or something. I’ll just do your coffees and ask him to disappear again. Whether he’ll listen or not…’

Elio nodded, and then smirked as he heard the server mumble ‘ _bloody fascists’_ as she walked away.

Upon returning to the library they found that Alana and Whitney were hard at work. Alana appeared to have stopped bashing her head against the proverbial brick wall, and had got considerably further through the worksheet than when they had left.  

‘Problem solved then?’ asked Rory as she put their coffees down in front of them.

‘Yeah,’ said Alana, ‘I just wasn’t carrying one of the molecules over to the over side properly when doing my calculations.’

‘Ah ha,’ said Rory, looking nonplussed, ‘Well why didn’t you just say? _I_ could have told you that!’

Alana just giggled and shook her head.

‘Well, glad you cleared that up,’ said Elio grinning, sitting down and looking back at his essay. His eyes scanned the first paragraph, and he wondered what he’d been thinking when he wrote it. What a pile of utter drivel. He tore the front page off his notepad, screwed it up and threw it in the bin behind Whitney’s head.

‘Good shot,’ said Rory, who’d watched him throw it.

Elio smirked, and picked up his pen to start again.

**

‘ _Ciao bello!’_ said his mom after Elio had said to say hello, ‘ _come va?_ ’

‘It’s going great; getting a bit _freddo_ now though. I need to wear a jacket when going out. It’s going to be freezing in the winter,’ said Elio, ‘How are you?’

‘Oh, wonderful, although the city is very busy. Very noisy after the peace of the country,’ said his mom, and then paused, ‘Hold on, your father is picking up the other line.’

‘ _Ciao bello’_ his father voice came down the phone, ‘ _come va?_ ’

Elio chuckled at the fact they’d said the same exact thing, despite being at opposite ends of the house, ‘Good, thank you. How is it being back at the university?’

‘It’s brilliant,’ said his father, ‘My post graduates this year are _brillante._ One of them has already come with an idea regarding contemporary copies of sculpture in ancient spaces that I’d not considered for my research. I’m exploring that at the moment.’

‘That’s good,’ said Elio, not really wanting to get into detail about his father’s research at the moment – that wasn’t why he called. He hesitated for a moment, wondering how to phrase what he wanted to say.

‘What’s up Elio?’ said his mom, sensing his worry to speak, ‘Is something wrong?’

‘No, nothing’s wrong! Er, I just wanted to let you know that, um, … I met up with Oliver again,’ he half-whispered. He had no idea what their reaction would be; whether they’d be happy for him or upset. He found himself holding his breath, waiting to see what they would said.

‘ _Ah amore mio,_ ’ said his mom gently, ‘ _Va bene?_ ’

‘Yeah, it was fine,’ said Elio, and then coughed, ‘Um… We’ve kind of been seeing each other again.’

His father chuckled, unable to help himself, ‘ _Certo che hai_ ’

‘It was not!’ Elio immediately denied, ‘I didn’t know I was even going to run into him.’

‘Well, you know what they say _mio amore_ ,’ said his mom, ‘Even in a city that big, people have a tendency to see those they know.’

‘Are you okay with it though?’ asked Elio. Regardless of what other people thought, he did value his parents’ opinion, knowing that they had helped him through when he had been utterly blue.

‘Elio, it’s not our decision,’ said his father.

‘But he is married,’ said his mom, the lilt in her voice letting Elio know that there was a hint of a question in the comment.

‘ _Si_ ,’ Elio admitted.

‘But as I said to you last year,’ said his father, ‘What you two have is special. So, I’m guessing that regardless of what we say; it won’t matter, you can’t stay away.’

‘It does feel a little bit that way,’ mumbled Elio.

‘ _Forse è il destino_?’ mused his mother.

‘I didn’t think you believed in fate,’ said Elio with a chuckle.

‘I don’t,’ said his mother, ‘But in this case…’

‘Mom!’ said Elio, ‘I don’t think I want to imagine that some higher power is pushing us together. I’d like to think it’s our decision.’

‘Of course it is,’ said his mom, ‘Just be careful Elly Belly.’

Elio smiled at the use of his nickname, ‘Thanks _mama_. I will be. Oh, _papa_ he gave me a copy of his book to give to you. Did the one he sent arrive?’

‘No,’ said his father, ‘A letter dated May arrived at the country house a few weeks back though.’

‘ _Riguardo a_ Vimini?’ Elio said, turning slightly as he heard someone behind him in the hallway. He turned to see Alana stood there. She motioned drinking, and then at her watch. They’d made plans earlier to go out tonight; Elio nodded in understanding.

‘ _Si_ ’ said his father, ‘I passed it on to Vimini’s father.’

‘ _Quello è buono_ ’ said Elio, ‘Ol-he was upset when he thought it hadn’t arrived.’

‘Well tell him not to worry,’ said his father, not commenting on the trip of Elio’s tongue as he stopped himself from saying Oliver’s name in front of Alana.

‘Okay,’ said Elio, ‘I’m going to go. _Il mio amico sta aspettando_.’

‘Do they know?’ asked his mother quickly.

‘No,’ said Elio.

‘Alright,’ said his father, ‘Well don’t keep them waiting!’

‘I’ll speak to you next week sometime,’ said Elio, ‘ _Ciao_!’

‘ _Ciao!’_ came the chorus of both of his parents’ voices before he put the phone back on the receiver and turned towards Alana.

‘That’s so cool,’ she said, gesturing to the phone.

‘What?’ asked Elio confused.

‘The fact that you just mash Italian and English together when you’re talking,’ said Alana with a shrug.

Elio smirked, ‘It’s even worse at home. It because a mash of Italian, French, German, and English. Depends who’s about. Sometimes when my mom’s sister comes to stay we even get Portuguese in there because she married a guy from Lisbon.’

Alana’s eyebrows rose, ‘I Wish I could speak another language.’

‘Why don’t you learn?’ asked Elio with a shrug.

‘I don’t have anyone to practice with,’ said Alana, ‘My family are as American as they come.’

‘You can practice with me,’ said Elio, ‘As long as it’s Italian or French. My German is no way up to scratch yet.’

‘Would you do that?’ asked Alana.

‘Yeah sure,’ said Elio, ‘Why not?’

‘Oh that’s awesome,’ said Alana with a smile, ‘Alright, are we going to the bar or not?’

‘Sure, why not?’ said Elio, ‘Are the others coming with us?’

‘Yeah, except Whitney,’ said Alana with a shrug, ‘But that’s to be expected. Zoe and Teddy will meet us downstairs.’

Elio nodded, ‘Alright then, let’s go.’

**

Later that night, lying in bed, Elio couldn’t help but let his thoughts drift back to Oliver. He was glad that he’d told his parents. He knew that whatever happened they would support him, even if they might be slightly cautious. When he’d fallen apart at the latter end of last year they’d been the ones, along with Marzia, Mafalda, and Anchise, who had picked him up and put him back together. They possibly thought that he was running head first into disaster again, and he reasoned that it was quite possible that he was. As his father had said on the phone though, it seemed like he and Oliver couldn’t stay away from each other, and no matter how much he reasoned that it wouldn’t work, he didn’t _want_ to stay away from him. Yeah, it could hurt him really badly if it all went south again, but he thought it would probably hurt him more if he tried to cut himself off from his temptation. Elio grinned as he thought of an Oscar Wilde quote regarding that very thought, that he could resist anything but temptation, and that the only way to get rid of temptation was to yield to it.

He wondered whether Oliver was back in the city yet, or whether he would catch the train back in tomorrow morning. How had his weekend with his wife been? Had she been able to tell that there was anything different about him? Or was Oliver a good enough actor that he’d been able to hide everything and make it seem as if nothing had changed?

Elio rolled over so that he was lying on his front, his face turned towards the crack in his curtains where he could see the sliver of the moon. Somewhere Oliver was looking at that very same moon. It was Monday tomorrow and he’d made plans to see Oliver for lunch in his office. With that thought he smiled, and tried to empty his mind in order to drift off to sleep.


	14. Red Flag

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are starting to heat up a bit... and I get a tiny bit filthy in this chapter. Not even sorry. 
> 
> Thank you so much to those who did comment on the last chapter, especially to Hannah, who left me the most beautiful comment that practically made me cry with happiness. <3 I hope you like this chapter as much as you've enjoyed the rest of the story so far! 
> 
> Let me know what you think. :)
> 
> (Also - over 200 Kudos and 80+ subscribers - Thank you guys!)

Elio settled into quite a comfortable pattern with Oliver; he’d see him about three or four times during the week, usually in the evenings (although they would sometimes go out for lunch – this was easiest on a Thursday, when both of their schedules had free time in the afternoon), and then Oliver would go home for the weekends. Mostly. In October, Oliver went home three weekends out of the four, and on the fourth he had to fly to Austin to be at a conference or something. Elio did miss him when he wasn’t about, it was a strange feeling because – as he tried to reason with himself – this time he knew that he was coming back. He got a weird fluttery feeling in his stomach as Sunday night approached and he knew that he would get to see him the following day. He was probably the only person in his flat who woke up brightly smiling on a Monday morning.

Most of Elio’s flatmates knew he was seeing someone, and nobody seemed to care that it was a dude. Zoe had asked a few times about meeting him, but Elio had always deferred, by telling them he wasn’t a student. Other than them he’d mostly kept that bit of information to himself. Other than Rory, she knew as well. He’d been to a few flat parties recently where he’d had to fend off girls (and the occasional guy), and he didn’t feel too weird telling people that he was unavailable. He wasn’t sure what Oliver’s view would be on him fucking other people, but he found that he didn’t actually _want_ to. Oliver filled his entire vision.

The New York weather was fast getting cold as November blew in, bringing a deluge of icy rain and cold winds with it. The leaves had mostly vacated the trees, with just a few last hanging orange and crimson strands left as testament to what had been a fantastically colourful fall. As Elio watched the last of them blow past his bedroom window he was reminded of walks in the park with Oliver, and that time that he’d had to pick fallen leaves out of his hair when they’d stood under a tree for too long. He was grateful for the hardcore heating system in the flat and for the massive winter coat his mother had made him pack. He’d been sceptical at first about needing a coat so thick, but he was so glad that he had it with him now. It just seemed so much colder here, even though they did get snow and ice back in B., he wasn’t quite sure why it felt icier here. Perhaps it was the wind that seemed to gust around corners and poke its fingers through whatever clothes he happened to be wearing.

It was coming towards the business end of the term, and he had been working on his essays, trying to get them into a fit state before submitting them. He still had over a month, but he wanted to make sure that they were good enough. He’d currently “finished” two out of the four he was going to submit, although they were still in final draft form and he wasn’t sure he was entirely happy with them.

It was currently approaching eight in the evening on a Monday night, and he was sitting in Oliver’s office, watching the blond man read through one of his more recent drafts. Oliver had been away all weekend, and this was the first-time Elio had seen him since last Thursday. He’d come up to Oliver’s office to work after he’d done with his classes at about five that afternoon, the blond man joining him after (Oliver had agreed to leave the door unlocked when he went to teach his 5pm seminar on the proviso that Elio was there a few minutes later and didn’t leave his office vacant for longer than was necessary). They’d been sat in companionable silence for over an hour, as Elio worked, and Oliver read an article for one of his seminars later in the week, scribbling the odd note in the margins as he read. Once Elio’d finished the page he’d been working on, he’d had cracked his knuckles and asked Oliver whether he’d mind reading over what he’d written so far. Oliver had simply reached over the desk and taken it from him, leaning back on in the chair to peruse his work.

Now Elio was watching Oliver as he read over the pages of ink that he had written. Oliver’s eyebrows were slightly furrowed as he read, his left hand holding the pages gently, being careful not to crease the paper. Elio’s eyes traced his fingers, his eyes resting on each knuckle, remembering a time last week when Oliver had used those fingers to give him an incredible orgasm – he’d refused to touch Elio’s dick, instead bringing him off by fingering him alone. Elio shifted slightly in his seat as his cock stirred with interest at the memory. Oliver shifted slightly as well, seeming to mirror Elio’s movement without even thinking about it, at the same time his right hand moved from his jaw, so that his index finger was just lightly resting on his lips. It was such a gorgeous image; the man whom he lusted after, cared for, perhaps even… no, well certainly that he cared for, sitting there with just the light from the reading lamp illuminating his chiselled features, deep in thought, as his fingers caressed his lips. Elio felt like his heart might burst from sheer pleasure at just being allowed to witness this sight.

Elio quietly stood up, causing Oliver to look up from his reading, his eyes meeting Elio’s. Elio shook his head.

‘Don’t stop,’ Elio said, moving around the desk until he was on the same side as the still-seated man.

Oliver looked slightly perplexed at what he was doing, until Elio sank to his knees in front of Oliver, half under the desk. Elio ran his hands up Oliver’s thighs and back down again, encouraging him to spread his legs so that he could fit between them comfortably. Oliver looked down at him, his eyebrows slightly raised, as Elio sat up on his knees, reaching for the button on Oliver’s trousers. The blond man didn’t say a word as Elio undid the button and the zipper, and tugged on the waistband just enough that Oliver’s cock was free for his attentions. He was half-hard, this part of his anatomy clearly interested in where Elio was taking these proceedings.

It went without saying that Elio loved Oliver’s cock. He liked touching it, sucking it, licking it, jerking it, being fucked by it. He just loved it. It was beautiful; heavy in his hand, and silky under his skin. He could spend hours worshipping it. He leaned in close, sitting back on his haunches slightly to get more comfortable, before very gently placing a kiss just under the head. It hardened further, now fully attentive to the proceedings.

‘ _Tease_ ’ hissed Oliver, still looking at him.

Elio looked up at him through his lashes, and saw the blue irises searing down at him. He licked his lips.

‘Keep reading,’ said Elio, ‘Otherwise I won’t.’

Oliver raised one eyebrow questioningly, but let his gaze slip back to the pages he was still holding.

Elio leaned forward again, his warm breath ghosting over Oliver’s cock, his hands on the muscled thighs of the taller man, continually stroking. He leant down and licked the full length, before gently taking the head into his mouth, creating a seal with his lips, and sucking hard. Oliver gasped at the change in sensation, as Elio used his lips to rub across the sensitive head, before using his tongue in the slit, tasting precome. Elio grinned as he felt Oliver put one hand on his head, unable to help himself, as Elio began to slowly – inch by inch – take Oliver’s cock fully into his mouth. Oliver groaned as Elio took him all the way down after several moments, his cock touching the back of Elio’s throat.

Elio began moving, slowly, wanting to draw out more of those delicious sounds from his work-week lover. He began to hum, knowing that the vibrations created amazing sensations throughout Oliver’s body. In with the hums he let out the occasionally deep moan, intensifying the feeling around Oliver’s cock.

‘ _Fuck’_ breathed Oliver, as Elio sped up slightly, using his tongue to create more wetness so his mouth could slick up and down the shaft easier. He created a steady rhythm, but elicited various gasped intakes of breath as he change up the motion of his tongue, especially when he focused on the sensitive vein just underneath the head of Oliver’s cock.

Oliver was nowhere near as loud as Elio in bed, so he had to look for other signals that the man underneath his mouth was getting close. Elio knew that the fingers tightening in his hair was one sign, as he sucked hard on the head of Oliver’s dick before swallowing him deep once again, moaning as he did so, enjoying the excitement of the other man. The other sign was the tightening of the muscles in his inner thighs, underneath Elio’s hands. Elio knew it was taking all of Oliver’s self-control not to buck up into his mouth, so as his thighs tensed and the hand in his hair gripped tightly, Elio knew that Oliver was fast approaching the edge. He took him right down to the root, his nose buried in the soft curls just above Oliver’s pubic bone, and swallowed around Oliver’s cock, knowing that the soft silky feeling would be enough to blow Oliver’s mind.

Elio was rewarded half a moment later with a sinfully delicious noise as Oliver came, his body going boneless beneath his fingers as he shot down Elio’s throat. It took all of his effort not to cough as it hit the back of his throat, but he managed to swallow all of it, pulling away just as the last of his release filled his mouth. A moment later Elio raised his eyes, still on his knees in front of his lover, and saw something close to adoration reflected back at him. Oliver reached forward and used his thumb to trace Elio’s lower lip to the corner of his mouth, where Elio could feel there was a tiny droplet of cum still clinging to the skin. Oliver brought his thumb to his own mouth, and sucked. Elio’s mouth opened as he panted slightly, taking a lot of effort not to cum in his pants like the teenager that he was. How was it that Oliver could be so erotic without even trying? Elio stood up as Oliver took him by the shoulders, practically pulling him into his lap, and kissed him. He knew that Oliver would be able to taste himself, but it didn’t matter. There was no sound as Oliver explored the crevices of Elio’s mouth, taking the lead and dominating their kiss.

Elio stepped back a moment later, his dick still painfully hard. He stepped back again, out of reach, when Oliver made to move towards him.

‘No,’ said Elio, ‘I want to wait. If you’re done here?’

‘I’m done,’ said Oliver, getting dressed properly again, ‘You want to wait?’

‘I want you take me back to your place,’ said Elio, stepping forward once again, so that his mouth was close to Oliver’s.

‘And?’ breathed Oliver, so Elio could feel his breath ghost over his lips.

‘I want you to take me back your place and I want you to fuck me so hard that I can still feel you in all of my lectures tomorrow,’ said Elio.

Oliver gripped him by the hips and pulled him close, kissing him deeply.

‘I think I can manage that,’ growled Oliver, after a second.

‘There’s one more thing,’ said Elio, stepping back again.

Oliver looked up at him, expectantly.

‘I want us to get tested,’ said Elio, ‘I know it takes about a month to get results, so that’s why I wanted to do it now.’

‘Get tested?’ asked Oliver, his face reflecting his confusion, ‘Why do you want to do that? Are you worried?’

Elio shook his head, ‘No, but I want us both to get tested so that you can fuck me raw.’

Oliver’s mouth fell open, with a gasp escaping his lips.

‘I want to get tested so I can feel your cock naked inside of me, and I want to feel your cum in my hole,’ said Elio, his eyes never leaving Oliver’s face.

‘ _Fuck_ ’ said Oliver, his brain clearly short-circuiting slightly.

‘Imagine that,’ said Elio, knowing full well that he was just being evil now, ‘You cum and then you seeing it seep out of my hole; knowing that you’ve owned me.’

Oliver looked as if he had been turned to stone, his mouth still hanging open as he stared at him. His mind caught up a few moments later.

‘You have got to stop talking like that Elio,’ said Oliver, his voice practically a growl, ‘Or all I’m going to want to do is bend you over the desk and fuck you right now.’

‘Ah ah ah,’ said Elio, skipping back a step so he was by the door, picking up his bag that he had left there, ‘Let’s go back to your apartment.’

Oliver’s eyes practically glittered as he reached for his own bag, put Elio’s essay inside, and flicked off the light, leaving them in darkness apart from the light coming from down the hallway because Elio had just opened the door.

‘Is that a yes then?’ asked Elio as Oliver approached.

Elio yelped slightly as Oliver smacked his ass in the dark before pushing him out into the hallway, and closed his office door.

He grabbed Elio by the hand, pulling him along towards the lifts before answering, ‘You know damn well that’s a yes.’

**

Once they reached the entrance hall below Elio saw that there was an event going on in the hall where he had signed up for his classes back in September. It was clearly full of people as it was very noisy with hub-bub and bustle.

‘What’s happening?’ he asked, pointing.

‘Don’t know,’ said Oliver, looking as two people came out of the doors and headed towards the main exit of the building. Elio stayed by Oliver’s shoulder as he walked over to the double doors and peered in. The place was packed with people, and the pair of them had to stand side by side with some others in order to see what was going on. Oliver was taller than Elio so he could see over the heads of pretty much everyone.  

‘ALRIGHT!’ came a voice through a microphone, and Elio glanced towards where a makeshift stage had been set up. A young man with an aggressively short hair cut was standing behind the mic, clearly waiting to speak.

‘Thank you for coming everyone, and expressing your interest in joining us on Saturday,’ he said, once the noise had died down a bit, ‘Now as you know, the march will only be taking us around the perimeter of campus, because that’s where the marshals will be stationed. The rendezvous point will be here.’

‘March?’ whispered Elio into Oliver’s ear. Oliver just shook his head and pointed, drawing Elio’s attention to a banner that was hanging on one of the walls to the side of the stage. It had the words AMERICAN TRADITIONALIST SOCIETY written on it in bold red letters. Elio felt his stomach clench and his heart rate speed up somewhat.

‘Now remember why we are marching,’ said the young man, ‘It is to protect our freedom of speech, and to ensure that our culture does not become a side story as others seek to marginalise us.’

‘Completely delusional,’ whispered Oliver, his eyes never leaving the man on the stage.

‘We’re not here to spread lies,’ said the young man, ‘Just to say that our voices will be heard. And when the university tries to take away our scholarships, and take away the courses that would be best for us, we will speak up and be heard.’

There was a cheer of assent from the crowd watching.

‘Come on,’ said Oliver, shaking his head, ‘I’ve seen enough.’

Elio nodded, agreeing completely; he felt like a lamb amongst a fox den.

‘Don’t forget your flyer for the march!’ a young man, probably no more than eighteen, saw them turn to leave and tried to hand a flyer to Oliver.

‘It’s okay,’ said Oliver, ‘I will not be marching.’

The boy looked confused, ‘Why not? We want to show the university that our voices will not be quietened, despite what the powers that be want. Ever since the new chancellor came in, he’s been trying to dismantle a lot of the old ways of the place. That has to stop.’

‘Does it now?’ asked Oliver testily, ‘And why do you think that is?’

A flicker of anger crossed the boy’s face, ‘Well for starters a lot of the revenue streams have changed, so that scholarships are only accessible to certain people and not others – all in the name of “fairness”. You only need to see the termly finance reports to see that that’s true. The university has taken its investment and return from supporting traditional American companies, to pallying up with all sorts of people down on Wall Street.’

‘All sorts of people?’ said Oliver, and Elio could see it was taking all of his effort not to explode in anger. He grabbed his hand, and squeezed to try and remind him to be as calm as possible.

‘Everyone knows the Chancellor is in the pocket of the Jew bankers,’ said another boy, who had been listening to their conversation.

‘Oh, so this _is_ an Anti-Semitic society, is it?’ asked Oliver turning to the newcomer, his voice hard as steel, ‘Or is that just a view you hold personally?’

‘Oliver, come on,’ said Elio, really not liking the way that this was heading, ‘Please, let’s just go.’

‘Who wants to know?’ asked the second man aggressively, taking over from his friend who now looked slightly worried.

‘I’m a lecturer here,’ said Oliver, loosing Elio’s hand and taking a step towards the newcomer, ‘And I think that this is a disgrace; if your opinions are the kind that this society is fostering.’

‘Yeah well, we’ve got permission to be here just as much as you,’ said the man, ‘Fuck off it offends you so much.’

Oliver drew himself up to his full six-foot-five height, and fixed the other man with an icy stare.

‘I wouldn’t stay here to breathe the same air as you even if my life depended on it,’ he said quietly. And with that he turned on heel and left the room. Elio left close behind him.

‘Yeah fuck off then!’ came the yell from behind them, ‘You and your faggot boyfriend!’

As soon as they stepped out into the darkness of the night, Oliver took Elio’s hand, gripping it tightly, as they walked towards the nearest subway station. Neither of them spoke.

**

‘You hungry?’ asked Oliver after they got back to the apartment. Elio was sitting on the sofa, having made a beeline for it when he came in the door.

‘Not really,’ said Elio.

‘Me either,’ said Oliver, ‘Drink?’

Elio nodded, turning to see Oliver bending over the bar, picking up the bottle of whisky and poured out two measures, and passed it over to Elio. Elio watched as he came and sat down next to him. Oliver raised one of arms so that Elio could sit into his side, Oliver’s arm around his shoulders. He smelled of the faintest hint of his morning’s cologne and of a day’s work around the city.

‘Are you okay?’ asked Oliver.

‘Yeah,’ said Elio nodding. With the time lapse of the subway ride to get back here he felt a lot better than he did when they’d first left the university.

‘I’ll go see the Dean in the morning,’ said Oliver, his hand rubbing Elio’s shoulder gently, ‘Ask him what the fuck he thinks he’s doing allowing those proto-nazis to have a space on campus.’

‘There was a lot of them there tonight,’ said Elio, taking a sip of his drink, ‘More than I expected.’

‘Hmmm,’ said Oliver, ‘I’m guessing that there’s the fringe elements, like that twat in the doorway, and then most of them, who don’t really know what it’s about, but they’ll follow along anyway like happy little sheep.’

Elio looked up at him, resting a hand on his chest, ‘I thought this kind of thing didn’t happen at University? I mean, I thought people were supposed to be all open minded and liberal?’

‘Don’t you believe it,’ said Oliver quietly, ‘A university is really just a microcosm, everything in that exists out in the world, exists in here too. We just put this front on it to make it seem respectable and middle class.’

‘Hmm,’ said Elio, ‘Dad never mentioned it to me.’

‘Perhaps it wasn’t so bad at Berkeley when he was there,’ said Oliver, ‘I mean, it was the sixties and seventies; free love and San Francisco vibe and all that,’

‘Perhaps,’ said Elio, and then after a moment, ‘Can we just go to bed? I’m not really feeling… y’know.’

Oliver nodded, ‘Yeah. That’s okay.’

Elio put his glass down on the table; he’d drunk most of its contents. Oliver put his next to it, and then stood up.

They didn’t bother doing anything else. Elio took his own clothes off, Oliver his, and they got into bed. Elio turned to lie on his side, and Oliver shifted so that he was behind him, holding him so that his back was to Oliver’s broad chest. Here Elio felt safe, and secure. He settled down into the pillow, and soon found that sleep caught up with him, cocooning him away from the events of the day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> P.S - if you're looking for other good Elio/Oliver stories I strongly recommend you go and check out 'Pocket Pass' by auselysium. It's brilliantly written and wonderfully addictive: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14872421/chapters/34436951


	15. Mayday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Longish-chapter today which is going to have to tide you over until Sunday. I have gone back to work now, albeit on reduced hours, so I have less time to write than normal. I hope this chapter makes up for that though. 
> 
> Thank you so much for the comments on the previous chapter, it warms my heart to hear what you guys think and I love you for it. It keeps me motivated knowing that someone other than me is constantly re-reading these chapters! (Although I'm trawling for errors over anything else - if you spot any, let me know!). 
> 
> Content warning for this chapter: There is racially motivated vileness in here, so if that is unduly upsetting to you, please be warned.

‘I left some books in your office that I need to take back to the library,’ said Elio as they travelled towards campus the next morning, ‘Do you mind if I come up to just grab them? Then I’ll be out of your hair…’

‘Of course not,’ said Oliver with a grin, looking down at him, ‘It’s early though. Do you want to grab coffee first?’

‘Will anywhere be open yet?’ said Elio. It was ridiculously early; Oliver taught his first class at 8am this morning, and he wanted to get his materials together before the class, and with it taking at least half an hour to get onto campus, they’d left at stupid o’clock. Oliver had been quite willing to leave him in bed, because he was all sleepy and tangled in the covers when they’d woken up, but Elio had insisted that he get up and come in too.

Oliver chuckled, ‘Of course! This is the city that never sleeps after all.’

They were sitting on the subway; there was plenty of seats at this time in the morning. Elio yawned deeply and put his head on Oliver’s shoulder, attempting to keep his eyes open as they rode towards the university.

They took the first left when they came out of the subway, to a small coffee shop that had opened at six am. Oliver was clearly a fairly regular patron, as the girl who was wiping down the tables for the day gave him a wave as he stepped inside.

‘What do you want?’ asked Oliver as they walked to the counter. The shop was empty except some bleary-eyed students propped up in the window who clearly been out all night; they’d obviously come in here the moment it opened in the hope of a pick-me-up. How effective it would be was debatable given the state of them.

‘Espresso,’ said Elio, hiding a yawn, ‘I think I need it.’

Oliver grinned and ordered two espressos to go. It didn’t take the sleepy-eyed barista long to make the two coffees, and then they were back out into the cold of the pre-sunrise New York street, Oliver handed him the Styrofoam cup which warmed his fingers. The first gulp of the searing hot coffee made him feel much more human.

‘I can’t do that,’ said Oliver looking at him.

‘What?’ asked Elio, looking at him over the top of his coffee cup, eyebrows raised in question.

‘Drink it that hot,’ said Oliver, ‘I’ve got to wait until it cools a bit. Clearly you’ve got an asbestos mouth.’

Elio laughed and nearly spat out his coffee as he did so. He leaned his head into Oliver’s shoulder, needling his forehead into the muscle, causing the taller man to laugh and push him away.

They passed several early morning commuters going in the other direction, or crossing the street. As they made to cross Elio stuck his arm out to stop Oliver being run over by a taxi who was going too fast as he overtook a badly parked lorry that was delivering supplies to a store before opening hours.

‘Asshole!’ shouted Oliver after the car, but it was long gone by the time the word left his lips. Elio tripled checked the road before stepping out again.

When they reached the building in which the Classics Department was they found it was pretty much deserted. There was a cleaner who was sweeping the entrance hall, but other than that they were the only ones about. They entered the elevator and Elio pushed the button for the top floor. Oliver came and stood next to him, gently leaning down and kissing him on the mouth as he did so. It was just a sleepy gesture of affection. Neither of them spoke as they ascended. The elevator door rung to announce that they had reached the top floor, and after peeling the grille open they stepped out into the still-dark corridor; the corridor lights didn’t come until 7.30 Oliver had explained.

‘By the way,’ said Elio, as they turned towards Oliver’s office, ‘You do realise the numbers on this floor are completely crazy, right?’

‘Yeah,’ said Oliver, ‘Although there is a reason for the madness. The rooms were numbered before they put the elevator in. If you go via the stairs then it starts at number 1, but they just had to find a random space for the elevator, so that’s why it’s messed up from there.’

‘Ah that makes sense,’ said Elio, realising he probably should have thought that that would be the reason.

‘Hold on, just let me get my key,’ said Oliver as they approached his office. Elio stood for a moment, watching him rifle in his bag, before turning to walk the last few metres to the door.

‘Holy shit,’ said Elio, stopping dead in his tracks.

‘What’s up?’ asked Oliver, looking up just as he found the key.

Elio didn’t reply; he didn’t think he could in that moment, his mouth was dry and he felt like his heart was having palpitations, he was sure he was going to vomit on the spot. He just pointed at the door to Oliver’s office.

In the beautiful soft wood of the door, someone had carved the words in large letters: FUCKING JEWISH TRAITOR, either with a knife or with a key. They were cut quite deeply, and were unmistakeable in their message.

‘Fucking hell,’ said Oliver, coming to stand beside Elio, his eyes scanning the words several times. He made to approach the door; his hand outstretched.

‘Don’t!’ said Elio urgently, as he reached out to grab Oliver by the arm, almost reflexively.

‘Why not?’ asked Oliver, looking back at him.

‘What if whoever did it did something else?’ asked Elio fearfully, his eyes scanning the corridor, and the wall around the door as if looking for some evidence of a trap.

‘They can’t get inside,’ Oliver reasoned quietly, walking back a pace and drawing Elio into his side, ‘I think it’ll be alright.’

Elio didn’t say anything, but half-nodded as he tried to believe him. Oliver let him go in order to move toward the office, and he watched as the older man slid the key into the lock of the ruined door and turned it, hearing the thunk of the mechanism. Elio felt himself hold his breath; he didn’t know what he expected; but felt a temporary relief when nothing happened, and Oliver simply pushed the door open, it squeaking slightly on its hinges. He didn’t walk in right away, however, and paused in the doorframe, looking for anything out of the ordinary or untoward.

‘I think it’s okay,’ said Oliver, holding out his hand for Elio to take. He did so, and felt an odd sense of security as he felt the familiar pressure of Oliver’s touch under his fingers.

Oliver walked in first, looking around as he did so, but Elio could immediately see that it was the same as how they’d left it last night. The books he needed to take to the library were still sitting on the desk, and the jacket Oliver wore when he was lecturing was still hanging on the coat stand by the window. Elio entered the office as well, his eyes casting around fearfully, despite having seen Oliver just walk in with no problem.

Oliver leaned behind him and slammed the offending door shut, so that the hateful words were no longer visible to either of them.

Elio looked at Oliver for the briefest moment, and then without being able to catch himself, he started to cry. He didn’t know why _he_ was the one crying, if anything it should have been Oliver that was upset, but the tears flowed down his cheeks none the less. Oliver didn’t say anything, he just pulled Elio into his arms and held him, even as Elio sobbed a wet patch into Oliver’s coat. He could feel himself begin to hyperventilate, but Oliver started to stroke him on the back attempting to calm him down.

‘Sorr- _hic_ -ry’ Elio mumbled, his face still half covered by Oliver’s coat.

Oliver didn’t reply but Elio felt him just hug him closer. A moment later he stepped back so that he could look up into Oliver’s face, and then wiped his eyes on the back of his hand.

‘Sorry,’ he repeated, ‘I don’t know why I’m the one crying. It’s not my door it’s written on…’

‘It’s okay,’ Oliver mused, his face stony, ‘It’s a shock is all.’

Elio nodded, and swallowed hard, trying to get his breathing back under total control. It was a shock, one that he couldn’t quite process. Why would anybody be so hateful?

There was a knock at the door a moment later and they both jumped, Elio quickly extracting himself from Oliver’s arms.

‘Hello?’ said Oliver, his voice slightly uncertain.

‘Oliver!’ came a female voice, ‘It’s just me.’

Elio looked at Oliver for confirmation that it was alright. Oliver gestured to a chair just beside one of the bookcases in the room. It wasn’t hidden per say, but it wasn’t in full sight of the door either.

Oliver opened the door a few seconds later and a flustered young woman stepped inside. She had brunette hair piled up on top of her head, and her glasses were slightly askance.

‘Oh Oliver!’ she said gesturing to the door, ‘What happened?’

Oliver shook his head, ‘I don’t know; I just got here and it was like that.’

‘It’s terrible, who would do such thing?’ she flustered.

‘I don’t know exactly,’ said Oliver grimly, ‘But I’ve got a good idea…’

‘What are you going to do?’ she asked; she still hadn’t noticed Elio sitting in the corner.

Elio watched as Oliver rubbed the back of his head, a gesture he often made when he was stressed but was trying to hide it.

‘I don’t know,’ said Oliver, ‘Well, other than get my door replaced.’

‘Well whoever did it can’t go unpunished!’ she said, ‘They need to be kicked out – assuming it’s a student.’

‘I think it probably was,’ said Oliver.

‘How do they even know you’re Jewish?’ she asked, ‘Not that it matters one iota.’

‘I don’t think they do,’ said Oliver, choosing his words carefully, ‘I think they just made an educated guess.’

Elio could see where his mind was going; after the run in with the boys at the society last night, one of them would have recognised Oliver and known where his office was. Regardless of whether or not they knew for certain he was Jewish, given what he’d said last night, they’d either assumed, or that was just language they used generally as a slur. Either way it was horrid. Elio felt like the jewellery around his neck was strangling him all of a sudden, and he fought to maintain a steady breathing pattern.

‘Do you need me to help with anything?’ she asked.

‘Ummm,’ said Oliver considering, ‘Actually, I know it’s a big ask, but would you mind taking my first-year class at 8 this morning? We’re just going over the themes of Homer’s _Odyssey_ … they did most of it last week, so this week should just be revision for them.’

The woman nodded, ‘Yes, yes I can do that. Have you got any notes that I can read?’

Oliver quickly turned to the desk and picked up the notes that he’d been coming in early to collect in the first place.

‘Thanks Bea,’ he said, ‘Thanks for doing this. I’m just a bit shaken up.’

‘Of course,’ she said, ‘Not a problem. If you need anything else; you know where to find me.’

Oliver nodded. She turned and glanced at the open door once again, her eyes scanning the words carved there. She shuddered in revulsion and then left.

Elio stood up, relieved that in her focus on Oliver and the words on the door, the woman hadn’t noticed him sitting in the corner. Oliver shut the door again.

‘It won’t be long until someone else knocks,’ he said, ‘I’m not going to be alone all day.’

Elio nodded, ‘I’ll just go.’

‘Elio,’ said Oliver and the stopped, pulling him back into his arms, ‘It doesn’t matter. It’s just stupid people with small minded, narrow, hateful opinions.’

Elio looked into his face, ‘But it does matter! Before it was just posters and words. Now they’ve actually targeted you! How can you say it doesn’t matter?’

‘I think they targeted me because I riled them up last night; not specifically because I am Jewish,’ said Oliver.

‘Oh, and that makes it so much better!’ said Elio slightly shrilly, feeling as if he was on the verge of tears again.

‘Look, can we talk about this later?’ Oliver asked, ‘People are going to start arriving soon and I’m not going to be left alone as soon as they do. I need to speak to the Dean, and see about getting a new door. Do you have any classes today? Can I come and find you this afternoon?’

‘I have a seminar at lunchtime,’ said Elio, ‘But I don’t think I’m going to go.’

Oliver nodded, not trying to argue with him, ‘Can I meet you at my place at 3 then? Are you alright to get there on your own?’

Elio paused for half a second and then nodded, ‘Yeah’

‘Please don’t worry,’ said Oliver, pulling him in tight again, lips gently kissing his forehead. Elio couldn’t help but offer a weak smile.

‘Again, I feel like I should be the one comforting you,’ mumbled Elio. He heard, rather than saw, Oliver smile. He let him go after a moment. Elio picked up the books that he’d left on the desk last night, and with one hand opened the offending door, trying not to look at the hateful message carved upon it.

‘I’ll see you later,’ said Oliver.

Elio nodded, and left the office, walking away down the corridor. He felt vaguely guilty, like he was leaving Oliver to deal with something that he should be helping him with. He understood why Oliver had said he should go, but at the same time he couldn’t shake the feeling that Oliver was in danger. He knew he was being paranoid, that Oliver was probably right; it was just stupid people with hateful opinions. That thought didn’t stop the sickness in Elio’s stomach, nor the bile rising in his throat.

**

When Elio knocked on the door to the familiar apartment that afternoon, it opened instantly to reveal Oliver, looking distinctly stressed. He stepped inside and immediately took Oliver into his arms, pulling him close to his body and holding him tightly. Elio could feel the tense muscles in his back as he ran his hands down the curve of his spine. Oliver rested his cheek against Elio’s shoulder and let out a huge deep breath, as if trying to let the cares of the world out with it.

‘Okay?’ asked Elio, and felt Oliver nod against his shoulder.

‘It’s just nice to not be there,’ said Oliver, ‘I’ve not been alone all day,’

‘Do you want to be alone now?’ asked Elio stepping back, looking up into his face. Oliver shook his head.

‘No,’ he said, ‘I want to be with you.’

Elio nodded and took him back into his arms, just holding him close.

They just stood there for a good five minutes, Elio just holding Oliver in his arms, despite the fact that the blond man was a good four inches taller than him. Neither of them moved or spoke, but just held onto each other, feeling the warmth and solidarity of the other man.

Then Elio stepped back.

‘Do you want to talk?’ asked Elio.

‘Yeah,’ said Oliver, ‘But coffee first? I just made a fresh pot before you showed up.’

‘Sounds good,’ said Elio catching Oliver’s arm as he made to walk over to the small kitchen area, ‘I’ll do it.’

Oliver nodded, and went to sit down on the sofa, as Elio found the milk he’d put in a jug, heated it in the microwave, and produced two cups of steaming coffee. He passed one to Oliver, who smiled gratefully.

‘What did they say?’ asked Elio once he’d sat down, ‘What have they done?’

‘Well I’ve got no door now,’ said Oliver with a wry smile, ‘They reckon it’ll be a day or two before I can get a new one; so I’ve had to move anything remotely valuable or worth keeping secure into Bea’s office.’

‘Do they know who did it?’ asked Elio.

‘No,’ said Oliver, ‘Although I mentioned my run in with the dickhead from last night. Unfortunately, seeing as I didn’t know his name, they can’t exactly go looking for him. There was over a hundred people at that meeting last night; how are they supposed to know which one it was?’

‘And what are they going to do about it?’ Elio knew he was pressing.

‘I don’t know,’ said Oliver, ‘I’m not sure they know. I think they’re probably going to ban them from meeting on campus.’

Elio nodded, knowing that that was all he could ask for at this particular moment in time.

‘That’ll probably make them angry,’ said Elio, ‘But we can’t let them get away with it.’

‘I know,’ said Oliver, breathing out through pursed lips.

‘Are you scared?’ Elio asked, looking up into Oliver’s face.

‘A bit,’ said Oliver, ‘The more I think about it I am. This morning I had stuff to do to sort it out, but now that it’s done for… I feel a bit helpless. What about you, are you scared?’

‘Yes,’ said Elio, ‘I’ve been scared ever since I first saw those posters on the streets. I feel like there’s somebody watching me; who knows what I am and hates me for it.’

‘What you are?’ said Oliver, ‘You mean seeing a guy? Being bisexual?’

‘No,’ said Elio, ‘I mean being Jewish.’

‘Who knows?’ said Oliver, ‘Why would anyone know?’

‘They wouldn’t,’ said Elio, feeling his hysteria rising slightly, and he gulped to keep it under control, ‘It just feels that way. How would anyone know that you were Jewish? Yet they did; it was written on your door!’

‘Hey, hey, hey’ said Oliver, drawing Elio closer to his body, ‘It’ll be alright.’

‘It doesn’t feel like it!’ said Elio, his hand reaching for his neck, ‘All I want to do is take this off! I feel like I’m wearing a target around my neck.’

‘What? Take what off?’ asked Oliver, ‘Your necklace?’

‘Yes!’ said Elio, ‘It just feels like I’m tempting fate by wearing it or something. Now I know what mom always meant when she said ‘Jews of discretion’! I didn’t realise there were actually people still out in the world who hate us just because of who we are.’

Oliver didn’t say anything, just let him get all of his emotions out in the form of a slightly-hysterical rant.

‘Are you sure?’ asked Oliver, once he was sure that he wasn’t going to go into total meltdown again.

‘I just don’t feel safe,’ said Elio, ‘Is that weak?’

Oliver shook his head, ‘No. Of course not. I think it’s the opposite.’

An unexpected tear slid down Elio’s cheek and he roughly wiped it away.

‘What about you?’ Elio asked, trying not to draw attention to the fact that he was crying again.

Oliver shook his head, ‘I’m not taking mine off. I’ve worn it every day of my life since my bar mitzvah. I’m not going to let some misguided pricks stop me now.’

‘That makes me feel terrible,’ said Elio, ‘Like I’m throwing away our heritage just because I’m scared.’

There was a momentary pause as Oliver considered this.

‘Let me wear it,’ said Oliver very quietly, ‘Then you’re not throwing anything away.’

‘What?’ asked Elio, searching the beautiful blue eyes of the man in front of him, ‘Why would you wear it?’

‘I’m just looking after it for you,’ said Oliver, ‘Taking care of it is all, until you feel safe enough to put it back on again.’

Elio’s mouth hung open slightly; he couldn’t believe what Oliver was offering to do. It was if he was offering to take a physical part of him and keep it safe; to hold it close until he was ready to take it back. Oliver’s hand went to the back of his neck, stroking where the clasp of his necklace lay. He hadn’t taken it off since last summer, when he’d seen the man in front of him wearing his and wanted to emulate that. To share it with him. Oliver’s hand caught the clasp and looked into his eyes. Elio nodded, and Oliver flicked the clasp open, holding one end and taking it off from around his neck. Elio felt as if a weight disappeared as Oliver slipped it off, holding it between his forefinger and thumb.

‘Put it on me?’ Oliver asked, letting the gold chain pool in Elio’s palm. For a moment, he just held it, feeling the weight of it in his hand, the metal warm against his skin. It felt heavier than it should. Then he held it, the ends apart, and motioned for Oliver to turn around slightly. He reached around his neck, and then did the clasp up, letting it fall against the current necklace with a slight clink of metal.

‘Thank you,’ breathed Elio against the back of Oliver’s neck, dropping kisses on the skin there, against the clasp of the necklaces now sitting there. He felt Oliver shiver, and the gooseflesh rise on his skin. Oliver leaned back into him, the warmth of his body flush against Elio’s chest. Elio wrapped his arms around his chest and held him.

‘Love me,’ whispered Oliver, turning his head slightly to capture Elio’s mouth and the breath that made to escape in surprise.

‘Really?’ Elio asked when he pulled back momentarily.

Oliver nodded, turning back around and resting his forehead against Elio’s, ‘Yes. I want you to fuck me. _Please_. Make me forget everything but this. Everything but now.’

Elio eyes widened and his heart started to pound under his chest, he could feel his cock stiffening in his pants as he took in the beautiful man. He nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat. He wanted to worship him; his body, his mind, everything that made Oliver who he was.


	16. Salt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ack... it's Sunday somewhere. 
> 
> Thank you so much for everyone who commented on the last chapter - it really means the world to me. <3 <3 
> 
> We'll call this Saturday smut day. That should be a thing. :P

They were lying in the semi-darkness of Oliver’s bedroom, having moved here from the couch as hands had slowly shed their bodies of clothes, interspersed with many deep kisses that made Elio lose his breath and nearly his goddamned mind. He was holding Oliver like a drowning man would hold onto a raft in the ocean. The curtains in the bedroom were pulled closed, but the blind was still up behind, creating a halo of light where the crack in the curtains didn’t keep out the day. Now they were atop the duvet. Elio was lying so that Oliver’s back was pressed to his chest, and he was currently littering kisses across the top of his spine whilst he prepared his lover with gentle fingers. They weren’t speaking, or making much noise at all, other than the occasional gasp from Oliver. Elio could see the muscles in his back move as he rocked gently in his pre-pleasurable state; Oliver was floating on this moment, and Elio wanted to hold him in his arms and keep him safe.

Elio knew when Oliver was ready as he shifted his top leg, and pulled it up against his chest, allowing Elio space to partially straddle his bottom leg. Elio pressed forward so that every inch of his body was flush against Oliver’s, and then with a slight hiss from both of them, he was buried in tight, warm heat. Elio heard Oliver’s gasp as he bottomed out. It felt utterly incredible, and Elio closed his eyes momentarily as sensations flooded his body, and his chest constricted with the feeling of pleasure that brought. He opened his eyes again as he began to very slowly rock forward, barely moving at all, other than to nudge that sweet spot inside of Oliver, gently claiming him again and again. _Mine. Mine. Mine. Elio. Elio. Elio._ He didn’t know whether he said that aloud or not. He could have done.

The skin of Oliver’s back was warm with sweat, so Elio dipped his head forward to lick at the pool that had formed between his lover’s shoulder blades. Oliver moaned at the feel of Elio’s tongue on his skin as they made love in the soft cocoon of the place they created for each other. Oliver twisted slightly, so when Elio leant up he could capture his mouth in a searing kiss, his mouth soft with the moan that escaped on his breath. The kiss was messy, more exchanging of gasps and muted moans rather than a proper kiss, as their hips rocked together.

This was not a fast fuck towards the finish line. Elio felt like he was uncoiling, pooling himself into the man in front of him, and Oliver was letting himself be the cup that would catch him. One of Elio’s hand was on Oliver’s hip, the other was stroking his chest, catching his sensitive nipples as he moved. Oliver, for his part, was stroking himself in time with Elio’s rocking.

‘ _Uhhh_ ’ Oliver gasped, his head titled back, resting against Elio’s shoulder, his eyes closed in bliss. Elio looked at this absolutely delicious sight in front of him, he wanted to preserve this moment forever; this beautiful man coming apart under his ministrations and movements. He felt like he might be floating. He reached around Oliver’s body and covered his hand with his own, guiding his strokes as they neared completion. When they came Elio didn’t know whether he or Oliver started first; he felt the shocks go through his body at the same time as the through Oliver’s, and it was all he could do but hold Oliver’s hips as he came undone, his body splitting apart at the seams, dropping wet open mouthed kisses onto the bare shoulder in front of him as he gasped out his pleasure.

‘Fuck’ breathed Oliver a moment later, all of the tension pooling out of his body as he relaxed. Elio couldn’t help but smirk as he reached down to stop the condom sliding off as he rolled away and disposed of it, returning a moment later with a towel. Oliver had his eyes closed, so Elio cleaned their bodies quickly and threw the towel down the side of the bed. Then he pulled back the covers on the side he was on, and after wordlessly encouraging Oliver to do the same he was back, his chest against Oliver’s body. The lay like that for a moment, the warmth of the covers bleeding into their bodies as they came down from the high of sex.

Elio leaned up on one arm a few minutes later and saw that Oliver’s eyes were open and that he was simply looking at the wall opposite, his mind clearly wandering as his thoughts did the same.

‘What are you thinking about?’ asked Elio, kissing him gently on the shoulder.

Oliver sighed and rolled onto his back so that he could look up at him properly.

‘You,’ Oliver said, ‘This.’

Elio hesitated, wondering if what was coming next would be good or bad.

‘I remember once,’ said Oliver, ‘We were lying in the sunlight, beside the berm, the first time you took me there, and you said ‘ _I love this Oliver_ ’. I was thinking about that.’

Elio’s hand was resting gently on his chest, and he kissed the smooth expanse of skin as Oliver continued to talk. He remembered that day as if it were engrained on his memory.

‘At the time, I thought I knew what you meant,’ continued Oliver, ‘I loved it too; the beauty of that place, the fear and excitement for what I felt – and was trying to suppress – for you. The calm, and the clarity of that moment. I thought I knew…’

‘And now?’ said Elio.

‘Now I know that then I didn’t have a clue. You did. You knew. You always were ten steps ahead of me when it came to this stuff. Maybe you didn’t know how to make me see it; but to you it was obvious. I feel like I want to capture this moment and hold it safe in a picture forever. Is that what you meant?’

Elio felt like he might cry. He didn’t trust himself to speak, so he just nodded, and buried his face into Oliver’s neck.

Here it was warm, here it was safe. He wanted to stay here forever. Oliver’s arm came up around his back, and held him close. Elio could smell the sweat of his body, the muskiness and the scent that was just distinctly _Oliver_. Today had been tiring for them both, and here they could let all of that fall away and just _be_.

Elio shifted slightly so that his head was on the pillow right beside Oliver’s. Oliver turned in so that their noses were millimetres apart, and he threw one of his legs over Elio’s. With his arm around him and their bodies close like this they held each other, eyes closed, just willing the cruel day to leave them be.

**

They woke to the noise of the telephone ring through the apartment. They hadn’t shut the bedroom door when they’d come to bed, so it’s noise was unmuted as it called out shrilly.

Elio heard Oliver groan slightly as he was woken and swung his legs over the side of the bed to stand up. He watched closely as the blond man walked over to the phone, completely glorious in his comfort with his naked body.

‘Hello?’ Oliver said as he picked up the phone, interrupting its sixth ring.

Elio could see his face as the person on the other end of the phone spoke. The blue eyes darted to meet his and a moment of fear crossed his features.

‘Naomi,’ he said, his throat suddenly sounding dry, ‘Hello… what’s wrong? Why are you ringing me now?’

Elio felt his heart thud faster in an involuntary reaction. As if she could see him there, despite being miles away. There was a pause as Oliver’s _wife_ spoke to him. Elio felt a mixture of emotions as he lay there in that second. He was naked in Oliver’s bed and he didn’t want to be anywhere else in the world, but all of a sudden, he was assaulted with a hundred different thoughts. He felt guilty; the woman on the end of the phone hadn’t done anything to him. He felt scared; she might take away what he had with the beautiful man standing metres away from him. He felt anxious; as if she could sense his presence, and he shook himself mentally to try and shed the thought.  

‘Of course, you don’t need a reason to call,’ said Oliver, ‘I just don’t normally hear from you in the week unless something’s wrong.’

There was another gap as Naomi spoke before Oliver replied with various pauses as the woman on the other end spoke.

‘She did, did she?… yes I know it’s not her fault… no I won’t get angry with her… yes, I’ll be alright; I’m a grown man. I can deal with this… yes, I know… no, they don’t know who did it… no you don’t have to do that… yes I’m sure… please don’t be worried… I’m sure it was just a prank… I’ll see you at the weekend… yes, I remembered that it’s the appointment… okay, see you then… bye.’

It was very strange for Elio to only hear this one side of the conversation, trying to fill in the gaps as to what Naomi might be asking Oliver or telling him. Elio felt a small surge of jealousy that she had this power over him, to just snap her fingers and he would be where she wanted him to be. Then again, Elio reminded himself, she was his wife, and yet he was here, lying in his bed.

He didn’t speak as Oliver hung up the phone and turned back to bed.

‘That was Naomi,’ said Oliver unnecessarily.

‘I heard,’ said Elio, as Oliver sat down on the end of the bed, fishing for his boxers and pulling them on.

‘Sally, the Dean’s PA called her, thinking the number she had was the one to get hold of me. So she knows about what happened,’ said Oliver, ‘I was going to tell her this weekend; I didn’t want her to worry.’

‘Why did she call her?’ Elio asked.

‘Apparently, it’s the only number they have for me at the school; quite how Sally didn’t figure out it wasn’t my number due it to being out of area for the code, but I promised Nai I wouldn’t get angry with her,’ said Oliver.

_Nai_ … The nickname, the abbreviation, the note of caring, knifed through Elio with a flash of pain that he’d not felt for a long time.

‘Oh, okay,’ were he only words he managed, sitting up straight and hugging his knees to his chest, the sheet dripping off his body, and pooling around his hips.

‘She wanted to come down,’ said Oliver, almost half to himself, ‘But I told her not to.’

Elio nodded, considering that for a moment, and then he felt as if his body was acting independently of his mind.

‘I’m going to go,’ he said, sliding off the bed and looking for his own clothes.

‘You don’t have to,’ said Oliver, not making a move from the bed, ‘She’s not coming here.’

Elio shook his head, ‘It’s alright. I’ve got work to do anyway. I’ll see you tomorrow for dinner.’

Oliver stood up as he pulled on his shirt, and then his jeans, trying not to meet those piercing blue eyes.

‘Elio,’ said Oliver, coming over as he shoved his feet into his shoes, not bothering to lace them up, ‘Are you okay?’

Elio looked up at him, their eyes meeting for the first time since he had begun to get dressed, ‘Yes, I’m fine. I promise. I’ll see you tomorrow.’

Oliver nodded cautiously, clearly not quite believing him. He leant down to kiss him, but Elio turned his head very slightly, so the kiss caught the corner of his mouth. Oliver stepped back, looking as if he might say something, but Elio turned to the door and opened it.

‘See you tomorrow,’ he repeated, almost mechanically, not looking at Oliver’s face as he flung the words over his shoulder and then shut the door before the other man could speak. He ran down the stairs onto the street below, the cold November evening making itself known to him the second he stepped outside. He hurried to the nearest curb side, where a drain was taking the day’s detritus and drizzle down into the levels below, bent over at the middle and was violently sick into it. Nobody on the street stopped to ask if he was alright.

He straightened up a moment later and wiped the back of his hand across his mouth. He stepped out into the road and hailed a cab, unable and unwilling to deal with the subway at this moment in time. He gave the address and then hurled himself into the back seat, letting himself be taken away from a place where he was sure he was going to lose his mind… if he stayed.

**

_‘The polls show that there could be heavy losses for the reds in the midterm elections next week. Of course, it is fairly normal that the incumbent party suffers losses during midterms of a four-year cycle, but forecasts show that this year could be especially hard on Republican candidates across America…’_

The radio on the kitchen windowsill was tuned to a station that had an hourly news briefing, and Elio was half listening as it discussed the upcoming congressional elections that would be happening across America the following week. Back home he’d always had a rather fleeting interest in politics, if the truth were to be totally known, but now… now it seemed as politics was going to rear its ugly head into his life whether he liked it or not.

_Jews of discretion_ … his mother’s words floated around his head. He wondered whether it would have made any difference to what had happened. Oliver was not overt in his Jewishness, he was simply confident in it. Elio suspected that he was right in that whoever had vandalised his office door had simply used it as a slur, rather than a targeted attack. Either way it felt _too_ real, and too close to home, for any notion of coincidence to comfort him.

‘… Yeah, so some nutters decided to vandalise his office,’ said Teddy, breaking Elio out of his daydream. He looked up to see Teddy putting food on his plate near the oven.

‘What did they do?’ asked Zoe, sipping on her tea.

‘Carved some sort of racist message into his door or something,’ said Teddy, sitting down at the kitchen table with his dinner.

‘That’s awful,’ said Zoe, ‘Do they know who did it?’

‘No,’ said Teddy, through a mouthful of mashed-potato, ‘Apparently, it was done late last night. He didn’t teach us today. Can’t say I’m surprised – poor sod. Probably shook him up a bit.’

‘Probably’ said Zoe, ‘I didn’t know people still thought like that.’

‘Maybe it was just someone who got a bad grade?’ asked Teddy, ‘I mean, surely no one _actually_ cares that he’s Jewish?’

Zoe didn’t reply, she just shook her head with a sigh and a shrug.

‘Are you alright Elio?’ she asked a second later, as if only just noticing he was there.

‘Huh?’ asked Elio, looking at her, ‘Oh yeah, I’m fine.’

‘Are you sure?’ she asked, ‘You seem… kind of out of it.’

Elio shook his head, affecting to blink in an owlish manner, ‘No, I’m fine. Just tired I guess. I’ll probably have an early night.’

‘Okay,’ she said, her eyes still narrowed as if she didn’t believe him, ‘Let me know if you need anything.’

Elio nodded and shot her wan smile before getting up from the table. He felt like he was kind of in a trance. He’d come in here after getting back from Oliver’s and had forced himself to eat a sandwich of some sort. He hadn’t really wanted anything else. He hadn’t really wanted that if he was being honest, but he felt like he probably should have eaten something.

He collapsed onto his bed after he’d gone into his room, his face turned towards the wall.

He didn’t know why he felt so utterly blue. Of course, he could pin the blame on the racist messaging on Oliver’s door; but that hadn’t made him feel sad this morning, just angry and scared. Scared more than anything. He could also blame the phone call from Oliver’s wife. That was the more likely culprit, but he has always _known_ about her. It just seemed to make her so much more real, however, with her voice on the end of the line and her threat of coming down to see Oliver. Not that it was a threat to her; it only felt threatening to Elio. It threatened everything he had with Oliver.

He glanced at the clock on his bedside table and decided that even though it was only coming towards half nine at night that he might as well get to bed, and get the early night that he’d told Zoe he was going to. There was no point just lying here in the darkness letting darker thoughts cloud his mind. At least there was a blissful escape in sleep; if he could reach it.


	17. I'll Build You A Boat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Over 90 subscribers! Thank you so much for everyone who is following this story. To the five people who gave me feedback on the last chapter - thank you so so much, it really makes my day when I hear what you guys have to say. <3 <3 Especial thanks to Aceteroid who left me a beautiful comment that literally made me smile from ear to ear because it was so lovely. 
> 
> I hope you guys like this chapter - let me know what you think! Hopefully it brings some joy to the beginning of your week :) xxxx

‘… Alright, well please remember I want to see final drafts from all of you by the end of the week. I want to be sure that you’re all going in the right direction before your final submission,’ said their seminar tutor as they all packed away their notes regarding the impact that the Silk Roads had had on the spread of eastern religions.

There was a general murmur of assent from the the group, and Elio caught Rory’s eye as she rose her eyebrows in his direction. He grinned and shrugged, knowing that they were both okay to meet this deadline, but still weren’t overly thrilled to be reminded of it. They’d been spending every Sunday in the library, amongst other random hours when he’d been around. He noticed that whilst he just shoved his notes inside his backpack, Rory had a nice neat file where she kept everything. He couldn’t help but grin at the difference.

‘Can I read your essay again before we have to give them to her?’ asked Rory as they left the classroom.

‘Yeah, sure, although it’s not changed much since the last time you had a look at it,’ said Elio, ‘Just a bit of the wording here and there.’

Rory shrugged, ‘Might still be useful -`

‘Elio!’

Elio glanced about at the call of his name, and spotted the owner of the voice leaning against the corridor wall just down from the classroom he’d just exited. His heart skipped a beat as he took in the tall frame of his work-week lover, arms folded across his chest. He was wearing a button up shirt, so Elio couldn’t see the two necklaces that he knew he would find around his neck if he were to look properly. Why had Oliver come to get him from a seminar? What was going on?

‘Hello,’ he said stopping in front of the blond man, Rory by his side, ‘What’s up?’

He didn’t know how casual he should be. He’d never met Oliver whilst with someone who knew him, and didn’t really know how he should play it when it was a friend of his instead.

‘Rory this is Professor Davis; he works in the classics department,’ said Elio, ‘Professor Davis, this is Rory.’

Oliver smiled at Rory, and Elio almost felt her melt next to him. It was that smile that he’d used on so many people last summer, the one that made them feel like they were the most important person in his life at that moment. Chiara had fallen for it, and Elio could tell that Rory was instantly smitten as well. Rory dopily grinned back.

‘It’s Oliver,’ said Oliver, holding out his hand, ‘None of this Professor Davis stuff…’

Rory giggled taking his hand to shake. Elio almost rolled his eyes but managed to resist.

‘Do you mind if I borrow Elio?’ asked Oliver, ‘I’m currently working on a translation for his father…’

The lie tailed off, but there was just enough truth in it to make it believable.

‘No that’s fine,’ said Rory and turned back to him, ‘Can I swing by yours tonight to grab your essay?’

Elio nodded, ‘Yes, that’s fine. Bring yours and I’ll have a look at that as well. Why don’t you come for dinner?’

‘Sounds great, thanks!’ said Rory, ‘See you later then… Nice to meet you Oliver.’

She sent a winning smile towards the lecturer leaning on the wall, one that Elio had never seen before, and then she turned to walk off, following in the footsteps of the rest of the departed class.

Elio waited until she had gone and then turned back to Oliver, ‘What are you doing here? Bit risky, isn’t it?’

Oliver looked at him with a knowing stare, ‘I came to find you, because I suspected if I didn’t then you wouldn’t come find me.’

Elio shifted awkwardly on the spot, knowing that he was probably right. How was it that Oliver could always see right through him, even when he hadn’t actually _seen_ him?

‘So, go on then,’ said Oliver, not moving from leaning against the wall, ‘Tell me that everything is completely alright with you?’

Elio hesitated, dithering slightly on the spot. Oliver had a way of making him feel completely naked, even when they were in a public place. Sometimes it was a good thing, and Elio felt like his insides were melting, but other times it made him feel completely and utterly childish and naïve. This was one of the those times. It did not feel good.

‘You’re right,’ said Elio eventually, shifting from foot to foot, ‘It’s not okay. Yesterday just freaked me out, alright?’

‘So, rather than actually talking about it with me, you just ran out, vomited on the sidewalk – yeah I saw you, y’know - and then thought you’d avoid me?’ said Oliver, his voice edged with irritation. Elio didn’t want to meet his gaze.

‘Look, can we not talk about this here?’ asked Elio, looking left and right along the corridor, scanning for people. He didn’t really know why he was worried; it wasn’t as if anybody knew what they were to each other.  

‘Why, is it _freaking_ you out?’ asked Oliver harshly, recycling his words from early.

Elio narrowed his eyes at him, ‘Don’t be a dick. It doesn’t suit you.’

‘Well, being a childish idiot doesn’t suit you either, but here we are,’ said Oliver.

Elio stared at him, ‘So are we just going to argue then, like some pathetic married couple? Or are we actually going to talk like adults?’

Oliver considered him for a moment, and then his voice softened, ‘You’re right, sorry, I shouldn’t have started it. We do need to talk.’

‘I have another seminar in twenty minutes,’ said Elio matter-of-factly, ‘And they take attendance. Can I meet you at the deli on the corner of my road after that?’

Oliver nodded, ‘Sure. I’ll see you then.’

With that he pushed off the wall with his foot, and turned in the opposite direction to the way Elio was going and walked away.

‘Later!’ he called, as his disappeared down the corridor.

Elio felt the familiar pang of lust, unease, and memory that that very word stirred up within him. He shook himself, and turned away to head towards his next seminar, which was a couple of blocks away in a different part of campus.

**

Elio was sitting in the deli on his own, waiting for Oliver. He had expected the blond man to be there when he arrived, so he was wondering where he could have got to, that meant he still hadn’t arrived. Then Elio heard raised voices outside and, lifting his head from the book he was reading, peered out of the window to see Oliver standing with his back to him, and there was a decent sized crowd gathering around.

Elio abandoned his booth immediately, shoving the book into his backpack, and hurried outside. He didn’t know what he was going to do when he got there, but he felt he should be there nonetheless in case Oliver needed support.

‘-I have every right to be here!’ said the man in front of Oliver, almost beside himself with anger as he shouted. He was wearing a suit, a red rosette, and was surrounded by a small group of people handing out flyers, ‘We are exercising our first amendment rights!’

‘Well then I have my first amendment rights to tell you that I think your ideas are fucking awful,’ said Oliver angrily, much less hysterically than the man in front of him.

‘This group has every right to meet on this campus!’ said the man.

‘They haven’t been banned… yet’ said Oliver as he glanced up at the group around the man in the suit.

‘The Dean is planning to stop our group from meeting on campus, and our march on Saturday has been cancelled,’ said a young man stood at the shoulder of the man in the suit, ‘This violates our first amendment rights!’

Elio briefly thought that if heard the words ‘first amendment rights’ again then they would be forever emblazoned on his brain.

‘They don’t give you the right to be racist,’ said Oliver.

‘Oliver,’ said Elio, making himself known at the taller man’s elbow. Oliver glanced briefly, but then his attention focused back on the group in front of him.

‘Can you prove that this group have been racist?’ said the man in the suit testily.

Oliver narrowed his eyes at the man, ‘Other than things I’ve heard them say…’

‘So no, then?’ said the man his eyes lighting up with the scent of his victory.

‘Oliver, come on, let’s just go inside,’ said Elio, ‘I’ve ordered for us…’

That was a lie, but he wanted to get Oliver away from whoever these people were. Oliver didn’t say anything else to the man in front of him; he just straightened up from glaring him the eye and turned on his heel to look at Elio properly, his shoulders falling slightly in leaving the fight.

‘ _Go on, fuck off with your boyfriend - faggot,_ ’ someone said, causing Oliver to whip back around to see who had spoken, but it wasn’t clear as to who had said it amongst the multitude of unsavoury faces. Elio grabbed his elbow to draw him back again.

‘It’s not worth it,’ said Elio as they walked away, hearing various members of the group laughing behind them.

They entered the deli and Elio could see that the booth he’d been sitting in had been taken by another group of students. He spotted another table near the back of the room and made a beeline for it. Oliver threw himself into one of the plush armchairs around the table, dumping his bag on the floor. It was relatively secluded here at the back, with most of the people choosing to sit near the windows, or in the booths at the front.

‘What the fuck was that about?’ asked Elio once he’d sat down.

‘I was just walking down here when I saw them and I just couldn’t help myself,’ said Oliver, ‘They’re part of that group; and they’ve got wind that they might be about to banned on campus, so they were protesting. They’ve managed to get one of the more extreme Republican congressional candidates on their side. That’s who I was arguing with.’

‘Oh,’ said Elio, ‘That doesn’t sound good.’

Oliver rubbed his face roughly, ‘They’re just a bunch of fucking homophobic racists. I really shouldn’t rise to it, but they just make me so angry.’

‘I know,’ said Elio, ‘They’re assholes; and we knew that there would probably be repercussions from trying to ban them from campus.’

‘Just didn’t think it would happen so fast,’ said Oliver with a sigh.

‘What do you want?’ asked Elio

‘I thought you said you’d ordered?’ said Oliver

‘I just said that to try and get you away from them,’ said Elio.

Oliver smiled, but it only reached half his mouth before it faded away.

‘I’ll just have coffee and a cookie or something,’ he said, ‘I’m not really that hungry.’

Elio nodded and stood up, heading to the counter to get what they wanted. His eyes slid to the large window, but the group that had been outside had seemingly disappeared, or moved on. Even if he hadn’t realised it, he felt himself relax very slightly, any immediate threat had disappeared. He didn’t quite know what he’d expected them to do; it wasn’t like they were going to storm the café or anything. Either way, he was very glad they weren’t there anymore.

He sat back down once they’d got their stuff, and was relieved to see that Oliver had managed to shake off the aggression that the arseholes outside had managed to stir up in him.

‘Sorry about that,’ said Oliver once Elio had sat down.

‘It’s okay,’ said Elio with a shrug, ‘I quite like how passionate you get about these things… it’s sexy.’

Oliver huffed out a small laugh and a smirk wound its way onto his face, but then fell away again as he considered him carefully.

‘So, are we going to talk about what the hell happened yesterday?’ asked Oliver, blue eyes boring into Elio’s, and making him feel distinctly uncomfortable.

Elio took a gulp of his coffee, ‘I was freaked out, I told you. And then the phonecall –’

‘- from Nai?’ asked Oliver sharply.

There was that nickname again, thought Elio, as the familiar pain flashed across his chest once again. He nodded dumbly.

‘Elio, you knew I was married when we started all this,’ said Oliver softly.

‘I know, I know,’ said Elio, ‘I guess just knowing that she was actually on the end of the phone made it seem so much more _real_. It just scared me… I don’t want to lose what we have. And also hearing the nickname you gave her…’

‘What, calling her Nai?’ asked Oliver, his eyebrows rose as he sat back in his chair, ‘Elio, let me tell you something..?’

Elio just nodded, waiting to see what he might say.

‘I have literally known Naomi since I was six years old and she was four. We met at family worship in our community and we ended up going to school together, and had been on and off for years. It would be weird if I _didn’t_ have a nickname for her,’ said Oliver.

‘Let me guess, she calls you Oli?’ said Elio sarcastically, unable to help himself.

Oliver raised an eyebrow, ‘No, she doesn’t. Do I look like an Oli?’

Elio shook his head.

‘It’s not a nickname, but she did used to have a pet name for me,’ said Oliver, ‘Although she’s not used it in years.’

‘What was it?’ whispered Elio, wondering whether he actually wanted to know the answer.

‘It’s stupid,’ said Oliver, ‘But it became something of a joke for us. It was as I grew taller when I was a teenager, and then I was interested in Classics. She used to say I was like some kind of mythical giant, a bit like Atlas. And then Atlas became A.T. and she just kinda called me that from time to time. As I say, not a nickname, but just something she used to sling my way from time to time and confuse people.’

Elio smiled, despite never having met Naomi, she clearly wasn’t stupid. Then again, he didn’t expect that anyone Oliver had managed to be friends with for over two decades would be.

‘It’s kind of cute, actually,’ said Elio, even if he was grudging in the fact that he had to say at all.

‘Look, Elio, I told you this before everything started,’ said Oliver, ‘You knew this.’

Elio nodded repeating, ‘I know… _I know_.’

Oliver sat forward, putting his hand on top of Elio’s on the table next to his mug, ‘Look, Elio. I don’t know what to say to you. Naomi isn’t suddenly going to disappear out of my life; but I want you in my life as well. I’m selfish; you know that.’

‘I don’t think you’re selfish Oliver, you’re trying to keep so many people happy,’ said Elio quietly.

‘And in doing so I make no one truly happy,’ said Oliver.

‘I’m happy when I’m with you,’ said Elio with a shrug.

‘Oh yeah, so happy you end up being sick into a drain in the street…’ said Oliver.

‘That was just a visceral reaction,’ said Elio, ‘I’m sorry about that.’

‘What are you apologising for?’ asked Oliver, ‘If anything I should be the one saying sorry, for making you feel like that.’

Elio smiled a wan smile, ‘Are we done apologising to each other now?’

Oliver grinned in response, ‘I guess so. But there is one more thing.’

‘ _Si_?’ asked Elio, wondering what was going through Oliver’s mind as he sat back in his chair, and rubbed his hand over his face.

‘Last night was the second time you’ve run out of my apartment,’ said Oliver, ‘And it feels awful when that happens. I don’t want you to want to run out on me anymore. I want you to stay; if you’re sad, or angry, or scared.’

Elio looked down at his hand on the table, examining how there was a cigarette burn next to his little finger; anything to avoid looking at Oliver as he spoke.

‘It’s just, no matter what is going on recently,’ said Oliver quietly, ‘I always seem to look for you to talk to about it, to explain, or just to be with. Look, what I’m trying to say… I think… is… I love you. And I want you around, with me, as long as you can stand to be there.’

Elio’s mouth was open; it probably looked like he was catching flies. It took a moment before he summoned up the wherewithal to speak, ‘Oh, uh, wow, I… Oliver… I -’

‘ – Hey Elio!’

Elio’s gaze broke from Oliver’s face and he looked up to see Teddy walking over, his hand curled around a takeout cup.

‘Hey, I didn’t see you there!.. Oh, hi Oliver…’ said Teddy, his eyes sliding from Elio across the table to where Oliver was sitting, his lanky form draped into the chair. Teddy looked back at Elio, who could almost see the cogs turning in his brain as he put two and two together and probably made four-and-a-half.

‘Hi Teddy,’ said Oliver, not bothering to try and come up with some kind of story as to why they were sat here together. 

‘Uh, sorry I didn’t realise you were meeting,’ said Teddy, sensing that he had clearly interrupted something, ‘I’ll just be going… I’ll see you at home later, Elio?’

‘Sure,’ said Elio with a wan smile, ‘Be back in a bit. It’s my turn to cook tonight anyway. Rory’s coming over as well.’

‘Remind me… Rory?’ asked Teddy, glancing back at Oliver as if he were unable to help himself.

‘Yeah, girl from my history seminar, I think you’ve met her before?’ asked Elio.

‘Oh yeah, I remember now,’ said Teddy, ‘From St Louis?’

‘That’s the one,’ said Elio.

‘Oh cool,’ said Teddy, ‘Alright, I’ll leave you to it then.’

‘In a bit,’ said Elio, as Oliver shot his student a smile. 

Teddy nodded, turning away from the pair of them and walking to the door before exciting out onto the street. Elio looked after him, a million thoughts rushing through his brain.

‘Well that was about as subtle as a brick to the face,’ he said after a moment.

Oliver chuckled, ‘To be honest, out of all the things that are going on at the moment, your flatmates perhaps knowing that I’m the guy you’re seeing, is the least of my worries. They seem to be fairly decent people.’

‘Oh, they are,’ said Elio with a smile, ‘Definitely.’

Oliver nodded, his eyes sliding back up to Elio’s face, ‘So… what I was saying before Teddy came over –’

Elio stopped him, leaning forward, and shook his head, ‘Don’t.’

Oliver looked troubled, ‘Don’t..?’

‘If I felt brave enough I would kiss you right here,’ said Elio quietly, ‘I love you too. I have from the moment I first saw you I think, and I have never stopped. I love you. I love you. _I love you_. _Elio_.’

Oliver’s face broke into the widest of smiles, he quickly glanced at Elio’s cup to see whether he’d finished his coffee before standing up and holding out his hand for him to take.

‘Come on,’ Oliver said, his eyes ablaze with a fire behind them, ‘Let’s get out of here.’

Elio grinned and nodded, getting to his feet. He felt slightly scared about taking Oliver’s hand in a place where he was sure that others would recognise them, but given what he’d just said, he took a deep breath and did it anyway. Oliver loved him; it would be alright.


	18. Stormy Seas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys... I just can't... honestly express how much I love you for your comments on the last chapter! To see my readers having a proper debate about my story/characters in pretty much the biggest compliment I could get as a writer. It tells me that my characters feel real to you guys, that they're flawed, that they're human. Being "real" was something I was striving for with this fic, and it seems as if I'm managing to head in the right direction. I was so happy with your comments and your engagement with my story... it really does mean the world to me. :)
> 
> Quite a long chapter for tonight... over 4,000 words. Might have to last you a bit longer as I haven't even started writing nineteen, although I do now have my plot planned out to the end. Not sure how many more chapters I'm going to have, because there's quite a lot of elements I need to get through. Probably somewhere between 5-8 more chapters + an epilogue. 
> 
> Let me know what you think about this chapter! <3 Hope you're all having a fabulous weekend! 
> 
> Love  
> V  
> xx

‘That…. was amazing,’ said Zoe, sitting back in her chair and patting her stomach in an overly contented manner. She giggled to herself as she unbuttoned the top button on her jeans.

‘Fatty,’ said Teddy, looking over at her fondly.

‘You love it,’ said Zoe with a grin. Teddy shrugged and shot an answering smile. Whatever those two had had going on seemed to have continued, and they weren’t seeing anyone else it seemed, but they didn’t put a name to whatever they were doing. They just seemed to muddle along okay.

It was approached half past nine at night, and the five flatmates, plus Rory, were sitting around the kitchen table, having just gorged themselves on large amounts of Elio’s cooking. Everyone was full, content, and rather sleepy.

‘Anybody want anymore?’ asked Elio; there was still some of the risotto left in the big pan that was sitting on the stove.

‘I couldn’t possibly,’ said Whitney blowing out a breath, ‘I’m absolutely stuffed – where did you get that recipe from?’

‘It’s one of my _mama_ s,’ said Elio, ‘Do you want me to give it to you?’

‘Yes please’ said Whitney, ‘My da would love that back at home.’

Elio smiled and looked around at the contented looks on the faces of his friends. He caught Teddy’s gaze briefly, but Teddy just half-shrugged and gave a tiny shake of his head. Elio smile gratefully in his direction; Teddy wasn’t going to suddenly announce to the group whatever he suspected about Oliver, he would leave that up to Elio. Or at least Elio thought that would be the case. Reality, however, was a little different.

‘Hey, Elio,’ said Rory, from the opposite side of the table, ‘How do you know that hot professor who came to see you earlier?’

Elio saw Teddy grin, as if he couldn’t help himself. Elio nearly rolled his eyes, but he guessed that his secret was going to be revealed one way or another. He thought he should probably just take the bull by the horns on this one.

‘Errr, he’s a friend of my fathers’ said Elio with a shrug.

‘Can you get me his number?’ asked Rory with a giggle, ‘He’s _gorgeous_ …’

Teddy snorted in amusement, before trying to hide it as a cough.  

‘What’s funny?’ asked Rory, narrowing her eyes at him. Zoe glanced at her not-boyfriend, looking puzzled at his sudden amusement. Teddy’s eyes flicked to Elio’s who just shrugged slightly in resignation.

‘Nothing,’ said Teddy, ‘I’m just fairly sure he’s off the market…’

‘How do you know?’ asked Rory, puzzled.

Elio cleared his throat, ‘Because he’s seeing me.’

Everyone turned to look at him; Alana’s mouth dropped open, and Rory let out a little ‘oh!’ of surprise, and then blushed.

‘That’s who you’re dating?!’ asked Zoe, sitting up straight in her chair, ‘A professor?!’

Elio shrugged, ‘Kind of, I guess? He’s an associate-professor though’

‘Uh-huh’ said Zoe, waving away the irrelevant information at the end of his sentence, ‘What does that mean – “kind of”?’

‘Zazu, leave the guy alone,’ said Teddy gently, putting a hand on her knee.

‘It’s okay,’ said Elio, ‘It’s just it’s complicated is all.’

‘It always is,’ said Whitney, yawning and stretching.

‘How did you meet?’ asked Rory curiously.

‘Well, uh’ said Elio, ‘At home we have a visiting researcher each summer… and last summer-’

‘-I knew it!’ said Teddy, ‘When I introduced you at the sign up session in September I knew there was something up; you looked like you’d been hit by a truck. I didn’t think that couldn’t have been the first time you’d seen him – but I didn’t know for sure, maybe it was just a fluke or something.’

Elio chuckled, ‘Yeah subtlety is not really my strong point.’

‘So, last summer?’ Alana pressed, ‘This sounds like an epic romance; I want to hear it!’

Elio blushed, unable to help himself, feeling as if he was sitting under a spotlight.

‘I’m not sure I could call an epic romance,’ said Elio, ‘But yeah, he came to stay, we had a summer fling, and then he left to come to back to the States. We stayed in touch by letter, but I never really expected to see him again. When I did… well, we just seem to be unable to stay away from each other.’

‘That’s so cute,’ said Rory, and Elio could practically see the love hearts dancing in her eyes, ‘I wish I could have a summer romance.’

‘Nobody worth it in St Louis?’ asked Elio, pleased to be able to divert the attention off of himself.

‘Ah there’s a few,’ said Rory, ‘But nobody who’s interested in me.’

‘Ah, I’m sure that’s not true,’ said Elio with a shrug.

‘You should invite him over for the next flat dinner,’ said Zoe, putting the attention right back on him.

‘Errr,’ said Elio, rubbing the back of his neck, ‘I could ask him? Alana, it’s your turn to cook in a couple of weeks – you wouldn’t mind feeding one more?’

‘Of course not!’ said Alana brightly, ‘I’d like to meet him. Make sure he’s good enough for my Elio…’

Elio giggled, wondering what they’d think if they knew that Oliver was married. He didn’t know how Oliver would feel about coming to hang out in the flat, but at least he now knew that he could ask. He might not want to hang out with a bunch of nineteen/twenty year olds.

‘Changing the subject,’ said Rory, looking at him, ‘Are we still going out on Friday?’

‘Yeah, don’t see why not,’ said Elio with a relaxed smile.

‘Where you going?’ asked Zoe.

‘There’s a bar in midtown that are doing an election event, loads of people are going to watch the results and drink whilst doing it, do you wanna come?’ said Alana.

Zoe wrinkled her nose, ‘I don’t really know anything about American politics – I’m alright I think,’

‘Alright,’ said Alana with a grin, ‘Well, if you change your mind… just tag along.’

With that, Elio pushed his chair back and got up, starting to clear up the table.

‘It’s alright,’ said Teddy, getting up as well, ‘We’ll clean up – you cooked, that’s how it works.’

‘Oh,’ said Elio, ‘Are you sure?’

‘No problem,’ said Teddy, ‘Come on Zazu, get off your ass and come and help’

Zoe groaned in fake annoyance, but got up and walked over to the sink to start running the hot water.

‘Do you wanna go look at our essays?’ Rory asked Elio, and then her eyes flicked to the rest of the flat, ‘You guys don’t mind if I duck out?’

‘Nah, it’s fine,’ said Whitney, who was by the stove, ‘You’re a guest; go a chill. Elio, do you want to keep these leftovers?’

Elio shook his head, ‘No, risotto always tastes a bit odd if you reheat it. There’s not much left is there?’

‘Not really,’ said Whit, ‘But I was just checking’

‘It’s fine,’ said Elio, and then turned back to Rory, ‘Alright, let’s go see what we’ve got.’

They left the kitchen just as Zoe flicked a soap sud at Alana, causing her to shriek and dodge out of the way and for Teddy to fall about laughing.

**

Alana’s eyes were wide as she looked at the television, fixated by what was happening on the screen.

‘I’ve never seen anything like this before,’ she said, her mouth hanging open in utter amazement.

Elio was half-relying on her commentary to keep up with what was going on, but could see that whichever way you looked at it, the results were extraordinary in their decisiveness. The map of the states, which had been fairly half and half blue and red at the beginning of the evening, now had large swathes of blue cut across it, where previously it had been red. Even some of the traditional “red” heartlands, such as the Deep South and the Rust Belt had patches of blue strewn across them. A loud cheer went up from a large group of blue-clad Dem supporters nearby as they watched was presumably their district turn from red to blue as the result was announced.

‘My granddaddy will not be happy,’ murmured Rory, sipping on her drink as she watched. It was nearing 2am and the results were flying in thick and fast.

‘I think there’s a lot of people who aren’t going to be happy,’ said Alana, ‘I mean the swing is huge!’

There was a sound of smashing glass, but they paid it no mind as they continued to look at the large TV screen. It was too loud in here to see what was being said, but the bar had put subtitles on so they could read what the news commentators were saying.

Elio looked around as there was another sound of smashing glass, and a roar of pain, as well as a cacophony of raised voices and the sounds of shouting.

‘What the fuck was that?’ asked Alana, trying to peer over the mass of people’s heads to see what going on.

‘There’s a fight!’ whispered a random girl near them, ‘Fuck, all hell is breaking loose at the front!’

Elio shot Rory a worried glance, but she wasn’t looking at him. She was too busy standing on her bar stool to see what was going on.

‘Fucking hell,’ she said as she got down, ‘We need to get out of here; there’s loads of people joining in and somebody’s been thrown through the window!’

‘Fuck!’ murmured Alana, ‘People are such fucking morons when they’ve had too much to drink!’

Elio grabbed her hand and Rory’s, and started trying to press through the groups of people who were in the bar. Then the fire alarm went off, and people began to panic. Elio surmised there probably wasn’t a fire, but some asshole had just pressed the alarm to make everyone panic and rush the exit.

‘Hold on to me!’ he yelled at Alana, who was behind him. She grabbed him around the waist as he gripped Rory’s hand tighter so that they wouldn’t lose each other in the melee. He was shoved roughly as someone tried to push past him to leave the building, but managed to stay in physical contact with the two girls. Everyone was pressing towards the exit to try and get outside and away from the threat of fire – real or imagined; some people were even climbing through the shattered window, although Elio wasn’t sure how they didn’t cut themselves.

Once out on the street he glanced down the street and saw that there was a large group of people heading towards them, carrying flags and torches.

‘What the fuck is that?’ asked Rory, her eyes wide as she also started to understand was was going on. She nearly fell over as someone shoved into her, but Elio managed to catch her elbow before she did. She didn’t even shout after the person who had run into her, because there was so many people moving about, she had no idea who it was.  

‘It looks like some sort of march…’ said Alana, ‘Wait, are they carrying confederate flags?! Is that a nazi badge??’

‘Looks like it,’ Elio said, his eyes narrowing as the mass of people started to get closer. People were panicking as more people pressed out of the bar into the street, trying to figure out what the fuck was going on.

There was a bang about ten metres to their left as someone set off a smoke bomb. Several people screamed adding to the panic as smoke filled the air.  

‘Whatever it is, it’s fast becoming a riot!’ yelled Rory, ‘Come on, let’s get out of here!’

Elio couldn’t agree more, and together they started to run away from the mass of people in the march moving up the street. Angry yelling, the sounds of broken glass, and some people screaming. More and more people were leaving bars up and down the street, adding to the crush and cacophony of noise. Sirens were added to the mix within minutes.

‘Come on!’ yelled Elio, as Alana looked behind them, and then yelled, ‘Watch out!’

But Alana didn’t move fast enough, and something that looked distinctly like a beer bottle hit her on the back of the head. She stumbled to her knees at the impact, but it didn’t seem to have hurt her too badly.

‘Fuck!’ Rory yelled, and gripped her under the elbow, Elio taking her other hand, to get her back to her feet. He glanced around, trying to find a way out of what was threatening to turn into a stampede. He spotted a dark opening between two buildings, with a street lamp at the other end signalling it opened onto another block a few across. Elio would never normally go down a dark alleyway at night, but right now he wanted to be anywhere other than on this street. He glanced back at the approaching marchers, and saw that some of them were wearing half masks across their noses and mouths, so that their identities couldn’t easily be discerned. They were clearly intent on causing as much mayhem, damage, and grief as possible.

Elio darted off to the right and down the side street, dragging Alana along with him by the hand. Rory was still holding her by the elbow to make sure she didn’t fall again and so that they didn’t lose each other in the madness.

They stopped when they reached the other end of the street, away from the noise of where they had just come from.

‘Are you okay?’ he asked turning to Alana, who now that she had loosed her hand, was feeling the back of her head.

‘I think so,’ she said, a little uncertainly, ‘One of those assholes threw something and it hit me, but I don’t think it’s bleeding..?’

‘It was a beer bottle,’ said Elio grimly, watching her – but feeling encouraged that there was no blood.

‘Come here, stand under the streetlight,’ said Rory, ‘I’ll take a look – you’ll need to bend your knees slightly, I am not that tall.’

Alana giggled, which Elio took to be a good sign – if she still had a sense of humour and the capacity to giggle then she couldn’t be that hurt.

‘It doesn’t look like it’s bleeding,’ said Rory, peering at Alana’s scalp through the masses of her hair, ‘I think you’ll just have a cracker of a bruise tomorrow. Do you want to go to hospital?’

‘I don’t think so… I think I’ll be okay’ said Alana wincing, as she touched the spot again, ‘And judging by whatever the fuck is going on back there, the hospitals will probably have worse to deal with tonight!’  

All three of them jumped as they heard the crash of something big and heavy being thrown, and the sound of shouting gradually getting closer again.

‘They’re coming this way; come on, let’s get out of here before we find ourselves in the middle again!’ said Rory, looking back to see whether she could see anything. Other people had clearly had the same idea and were pouring through the alleyway which they had just come. Elio thought the marchers wouldn’t try and cut through there, they’d have to look for another, wider, road to cut across if they wanted to; if the police didn’t break it up by then.  

Elio nodded vehemently and looked around, noting that there was an unusual dearth of cabs for New York City.

‘I think we’ll have to go up a few streets to catch a cab,’ he said, ‘They’ve probably been told by the police not to come down this far.’

‘Yeah,’ said Rory, and glanced at the other girl, ‘Are you okay with that Alana?’

‘Yeah that’s fine,’ said Alana, ‘If I start feeling faint I’ll let you know’

‘I’m sure between the two of us we could manage to carry you,’ said Elio with a smirk as they set off at a brisk pace, heading up the blocks to try and get to somewhere where they could find a taxi.

It was a fruitless exercise. Cabs were just simply nowhere to be found. It was clear that the riot in midtown was very serious as ambulances and police cars belted down the streets towards the commotion. Elio saw people running, some of them holding friends who appeared to have sustained minor injuries. They stopped by two girls; one of whom was standing, the other sitting on the curb, to see if they needed any help.

‘Are you okay?’ Rory asked them.

‘Yeah, I think I just twisted my ankle when I was running,’ said the girl sitting on the curb, holding the offending joint in her hand, her face showing the pain.

‘Fuck, that was scary as hell,’ said the other girl, glancing as another three police cars raced past them, sirens screaming to the dark night.

Elio nodded, ‘I’m sure the police will get it under control soon. Do you need us to help you?’

‘I’ll be alright,’ said the sitting girl, ‘I only live one block across; I’ll make it… slowly.’

‘Okay,’ said Elio, ‘As long as you’re sure’

The girl nodded, ‘Thanks for asking’

Elio smiled and then looked at Rory and Alana, ‘You two ready?’

Alana nodded and took Rory’s hand, ‘Looks like we’re going to be walking doesn’t it?’

‘Pretty much,’ said Elio, looking about in vain for an empty cab, but was unsurprised when he couldn’t see anything. The roads were strangely empty – maybe the police had set up a blockade further uptown to stop people driving down this way. That would make sense.

‘Come on,’ said Rory, glancing at sign which told them they were on 58th street, ‘It’s going to be a long fucking walk.’

**

They walked for at least twelve blocks before they managed to pick up a taxi somewhere near 71st and Park Ave. They threw themselves into the back and Elio gave the driver the address.

‘You guys alright?’ the cab driver asked, ‘Have you been in Midtown?’

‘Yeah,’ said Elio, his limbs suddenly feeling heavy as the adrenaline in his muscles started to cause the production of lactic acid. He tried to shake off the ache.

‘They’ve stopped all traffic from going below 70th whilst they try and sort it out,’ said the driver as he headed up through the busier streets, traffic getting back to regular levels as the impact of the police blockade lessened.

‘Thought they’d done that,’ said Rory, ‘Probably a good thing; it’s a fucking mess down there.’

The driver looked concerned after glancing in his rear-view mirror; ‘Does she need a hospital?’

Elio glanced across at Alana who was touching the back of head again.

‘Are you okay Lala?’ he asked again, squeezing her knee.

‘Yeah,’ she said, ‘Just a bit dizzy is all.’

‘Okay,’ said Elio, ‘Well let me know if it gets any worse.’

It took about eight minutes to make their way back to the road the flat was on. Elio paid the driver and they got out of the cab; he’d never been more glad to arrive on this street than he was right now. Elio could see that the street was alive with more people than normal for about 4am on Sunday morning as news of the riot spread and people wanted to know what was happening, or worried about friends or partners who were out on the town.

‘Come on,’ he said to the girls as they had to traverse to the other end of the street, the cab only being able to drop them at the wrong end due to the flow of traffic.

As they approached the doorway Elio saw that there was a group gathered on the doorstep; as they got a bit closer he identified the figures of Zoe, Whitney, Teddy, and… Oliver? What was he doing here? It was a Friday night. Shouldn’t he be upstate?

‘Elio!’ Zoe called out as she spotted them, standing up, ‘Oh my god, are you guys alright?’

Elio didn’t have a chance to respond as the next second he was drawn into a massive bear-hug by Oliver, crushing him into his chest, the warmth of his arms encircling him into a protective embrace

A few seconds later he let him go, holding him at arm’s length as he looked him up and down, ‘Are you okay?’

Elio nodded, glancing up at his face, creased with worry, ‘Yeah, I’m fine. Just super tired is all…’

‘Are any of you hurt?’ asked Whitney, coming over. Elio saw that they were all wearing their pyjamas, apart from Oliver of course.

‘Alana got hit by a beer bottle,’ said Rory, gesturing, ‘But it’s not bleeding.’

Whitney’s brow furrowed as she looked at the long-haired brunette, ‘Come over here into the light, it’s not much, but I’ll take a look.’

Alana smiled, ‘Alright Doc.’

Elio looked away from them and back up at Oliver, ‘What are you doing here? I thought you’d be… away.’

Oliver shook his head, ‘I’ve to a research seminar tomorrow, so I’m in town this weekend – I told you that earlier this week, remember? When I heard what was going on I came straight over here. I remembered where you said you were going and I wanted to know that you were safe. God Elio, I was so worried when I got here and you weren’t here.’

Elio curved himself into Oliver’s side, ‘I’m glad you came down here. It means a lot that you were worried.’

‘Of course I was!’ said Oliver, holding him and planting several kisses on his forehead. Elio noticed that Oliver’s hands were shaking on his waist.

‘What time is it?’ Elio asked no one in particular.

‘Coming up to 4.30am,’ said Teddy, glancing at his watch. Alana and Whitney rejoined the group standing in the doorway.

‘Will she live doc?’ asked Rory.

‘Yeah, I think she’ll be fine,’ said Whitney biting her lip, ‘But I’ll keep an eye out for concussion for the next few hours.’

‘Good plan’ said Rory, ‘Alright, I should be getting back to my flat.’

‘Don’t be silly! You’re not going to try and get across town now,’ said Elio instantly, ‘Stay here tonight!’

Rory looked about, biting her lip, ‘Are you sure?’

‘Yeah,’ said Whitney nodding, ‘I’m going to sleep in Alana’s room, just in case. You can take my bed.’

‘Oh,’ said Rory, ‘That’s very kind of you.’

‘No worries,’ said Whitney with a smile and a shrug.

‘Come on,’ said Zoe, gesturing inside, ‘I’m freezing my bollocks off out here. And in very British spirit I think everyone could do with a nice cup of tea and then their beds. Does that sound like a good idea?’

‘That sounds perfect Zoe,’ said Oliver smiling at her, ‘Thank you’

With that the group on the doorstep began to filter inside, the sounds of sirens still renting the night around them. Elio and Oliver were the last outside, and Oliver stopped them before they went inside after the rest of the group.

‘What’s up?’ asked Elio, looking up into the blue eyes of the man he adored.

Oliver didn’t speak, but just pulled Elio into another hug. They were connected all down their bodies, thigh-to-thigh, hip bones touching, chest crushed to chest. As Oliver held him, Elio realised that the other man was crying.

‘Are you alright?’ Elio asked softly, not breaking the embrace.

‘Yeah,’ whispered Oliver, still holding him, ‘I was just really scared. I never want to feel like that again. It was horrible not knowing whether you were safe.’

‘It’s alright,’ said Elio soothingly, ‘I’m fine. I love you.’

Oliver nodded into his shoulder, his arms still around Elio’s body, ‘I love you too.’

Elio felt him take a deep breath before stepping back. Oliver rubbed the back of his hands across his face, getting rid of the residual tears; although his eyes were slightly red.

‘Come on,’ said Elio, ‘Let’s go upstairs… otherwise I’m going to fall asleep where I stand.’

Oliver smiled and took his hand, ‘Come on then.’

Oliver led him in first, and then closed the door behind him, shutting the door on the dark, and on what had been a ridiculously crazy night. Elio’s head was spinning, and he was sure it would take him a while to sort through the events of the evening in his mind. Right now, however, all he was concerned about was the tea Zoe had made, and the beckoning call of his warm, soft, comfortable bed.


	19. Perfect Doldrums

Elio woke up before Oliver the following morning, lying almost completely straight, his body pressed against the cold wall of his bedroom, despite having tried to wrap the duvet around himself to protect himself from the cold plaster. The single beds in student accommodation were definitely not made for a 6-foot guy and his 6 foot 5” lover to share; there was barely room for the two of them. It was a good thing that Oliver didn’t move much in his sleep; if he’d have rolled over he would’ve fallen out of bed. Elio shifted slowly, rolling over without actually moving his body across the bed. Unsurprisingly, the slow pattern of Oliver’s breathing changed just after he had rolled over, signifying that he was slowly coming around to wakefulness.

‘Morning,’ Oliver whispered, without opening his eyes.

‘Mmmmm’ said Elio, looking down at his sleep-relaxed features. He was extremely beautiful, and Elio thought he could probably lie here all day simply looking at him.  

‘How are you feeling this morning?’ said Oliver, eventually opening his eyes and turning his head slightly to look up at Elio.

‘Alright,’ said Elio, shrugging as best as he could in the position he was in, ‘Still sleepy – what time is it?’

Oliver turned his head to look at Elio’s watch that was lying on the bedside table.

‘Coming up to eleven,’ he said quietly, and stretched slightly, ‘Haven’t heard anyone else up and about though..?’

‘No I don’t think so. I’m not surprised though,’ said Elio, ‘It was coming up to five-thirty by the time we disappeared to bed.’

‘Yeah,’ said Oliver, rubbing his hand over his eyes, ‘They must all still be sleeping,’

There was a slow moment of quiet as they both gathered their sleep-scattered thoughts.

‘What time is your seminar?’ asked Elio softly.

‘Not until this evening,’ said Oliver, ‘We’re listening to the speakers and then going to a dinner.’

‘Sounds like it could be good,’ said Elio.

‘Yeah,’ said Oliver, ‘It actually will be; the speakers are really interesting.’

Elio smiled softly at the enthusiasm in Oliver’s eyes. He loved how passionate Oliver was about what he did, and he loved the excitement he saw in his eyes whenever he spoke about it. He hoped that one day he could find a job like that.

Elio grinned sleepily, an idea forming in his mind. He then stretched like a well-fed contented cat. He slowly moved his hand from resting atop his own hip, and slid it across onto Oliver’s belly, stroking the warm, tight body under his fingers. Oliver tilted his head up and smiled a sleepy smirk as Elio slipped his hand lower, tracing across the ‘v’ of his hip and further on down. He stopped as his fingertips rested by Oliver’s cock.

‘Mmmmmm?’ asked Elio, except this time it was a question rather than an answer.

‘Mmmm,’ groaned Oliver in answer as Elio slowly began to stroke his half-hard morning woody to full attention, ‘I thought you said you were sleepy?’

‘We can still have sex and be sleepy,’ said Elio with a grin, his eyebrow raised in conspiratorial manner.

Oliver chuckled, and then leaned up slightly to capture Elio’s mouth in a soft kiss.

‘We have to be quiet,’ said Elio softly as he broke away a moment later, ‘The others will hear us…’

Oliver nodded, his head pushing back into the pillow as Elio continued to stroke up and down his cock, using the precome that was now leaking out of the slit to slick the way.

‘Uhhh,’ said Oliver, unable to help himself, pushing his hips up into Elio’s hand. Elio grinned at the gasp of protest that escaped Oliver’s lips as he stopped, and leaned across him to the bedside draw. He grabbed a condom and some lube from the draw, and quickly rolled the latex down over Oliver’s cock before slicking it with more lube. He was feeling impatient and horny, so that would have to do. Elio moved his left leg over Oliver, so that he was straddling him. He leant down and kissed Oliver again, his hands sliding to his shoulders to press their chests together. Elio shivered slightly as the reality of sitting naked in November without the bed covers started to creep across his skin. Oliver noticed and reached down past his hips to grab the duvet cover and pulled it up so that it was trailed it over Elio’s shoulders, cocooning them in residual warmth.

‘Do y’not want…’ Oliver tailed off as Elio knelt up above him, to which Elio shook his head his head. Oliver held his cock as Elio slowly lowered himself down, stopping for a moment as his body adjusted. Elio hissed slightly through his teeth at the burn, at the stretch, but at the same time he welcomed the feeling, and got a kick out of the sensation as he sank all the way onto Oliver’s cock, so his ass was flush to his hips. Only aided by the lube he’d slicked onto Oliver’s cock it took a moment or two more for him to adjust to the size before he could move comfortably. He used the intervening time to lazily kiss the man underneath him. He probably should have let Oliver prepare him, but he was feeling too impatient to bother.

Elio started to move up and down, using his thigh muscles to rock slowly. This position gave him much more control than if he was on the bottom, and he lent forward, putting his hands on Oliver’s chest, angling himself so each time he dropped down Oliver’s cock hit his prostate dead on and Elio nearly lost his rhythm a few times, because it felt _so fucking good_.

‘Fuck…’ Oliver breathed, his hands on Elio’s hips, as he looked up at him, ‘You look so beautiful like this.’

Elio smiled and leaned down to kiss Oliver deeply. Oliver moved one hand to the back of his neck, holding him as their oxygen levels dwindled into the kiss. Elio broke the kiss a moment later as he moaned deeply, huffing his pleasure as he continued to rock. Oliver shifted so that his feet were planted on the bed, so he could push up into Elio as he moved down. Elio bit his lip as his head fell back with the pleasure coursing through his body as Oliver’s movements meant he could drive deeper into his body, setting his nerves alight with delight. He put his own hand over his mouth to stop himself from making a noise as his whole body began to burn with the pleasure he was feeling. Oliver took his hand away a moment later, only to sinfully suck Elio’s fingers into his mouth. It was such a sinful image that Elio had to pant heavily not to instantly cum.

‘ _Fuck, fuck, fuck,’_ Elio whispered as he felt himself approaching the precipice of his orgasm. He reached down to grip his own cock and started to stroke in tandem with Oliver’s thrusts into his body. Oliver grinned, and moved one of his hands from Elio’s hip and took over from him, stroking his cock.

‘ _Ahhh, fuck,’_ Elio muttered, unable to expand his vocabulary any further at that present moment as he felt his stomach tightening in pleasure, a few more moments was all it needed. His mouth fell open and he groaned as he came, painting Oliver’s chest and even hitting his chin with his release. Oliver came a few moments later, gripping his hip hard with his right hand as he thrust _once, twice_ and again into Elio’s body as he came.

‘ _Fuckkk,’_ Oliver breathed a few moments later as his mind slowly came back to something close to normal. Elio gently moved off his body, allowing Oliver to dispose of the condom and then roll back into the warmth of their shared duvet cocoon.

‘You are so fucking hot when you cum,’ said Oliver, looking across at him, ‘Your pretty head thrown back, your mouth open, your eyes screwed shut with pleasure. That look alone would make me cum.’

If Elio hadn’t cum only one minute ago, he would have been rock hard again with Oliver’s words. He didn’t speak, but he did lean down and lick the small drop of cum that was still sitting on Oliver’s chin. Oliver groaned into his neck, and pulled him in for a kiss before rolling them over so he was half lying above him. His arms encircled his body and he continued to lazily kiss him. A few moments later Oliver shifted so that they were lying pressed together. It was like this, sleepily entwined, and thoroughly sated, that they slowly drifted back off to sleep again.

**

It was approaching three in the afternoon when they woke again, and Oliver had to hurriedly shower, and then rush to leave in order to get changed for the research dinner that evening. Before he left he looked in on Alana, who was sitting up in her bed, just to check that she was alright. She was; but had just been feeling a bit dizzy/headachey since she woke up. She was just going to take it slow for the rest of the weekend and she was sure she would be fine. Later that day Elio took her some soup in bed, and they sat in her room together whilst she ate. Rory had left earlier in order to go back to her flat to hunt a shower and a change of clothes. The rest of the flat decided to gather in Alana’s room to eat, and were perched in various places. Teddy had dragged a beanbag in from his room, which he and Zoe were sat on. Whitney was sitting on the desk chair, one foot on the seat so that her knee was under her chin, whilst Elio was on the foot of Alana’s bed. Alan herself was propped up with pillows at the top.

‘Are you looking forward to the end of term then?’ asked Zoe, looking across at Elio, ‘Everything nearly finished?’

‘Yeah,’ said Elio, ‘It’ll be nice to see _miei genitori_ again. We’ll go back to the country house for the holiday.’

‘The country house?’ asked Whitney raising her eyebrow, ‘Sounds very grand.’

Elio blushed slightly and shrugged, ‘Yeah, well, they live in _Milano_ during term time, and then escape to the countryside during the holidays.’

‘Sounds like something I’d like to do,’ said Alana, ‘Living in the city all the time would just get too much.’

‘What about you guys?’ asked Elio.

‘My parents are coming here for the break,’ said Zoe, ‘Not all of it mind; but they wanted to spend Christmas in New York.’

‘I’m sure that’ll be amazing,’ said Whitney, ‘I’m heading back to Ireland. But this’ll be my only visit until term ends in the summer. I can’t afford to do it at the end of every term.’

‘I’m just heading home,’ said Alana sleepily.

‘Same,’ said Teddy with a yawn, ‘Get to see the good ol’ family again.’

‘You don’t sound too excited by that fact,’ said Alana.

‘Nah, they’re okay,’ said Teddy, ‘I just get a bit bored back at home; there’s not a huge amount to do, y’know?’

‘I know how that feels,’ said Whitney, ‘We live on the outskirts of Dublin, more of a small town than actually part of the city; and all around us are just farms. It gets pretty dull… especially in the winter when it’s raining _non stop,_ gets dark really early and you can’t really go anywhere.’

Elio scrunched up his nose in sympathy and then jumped as the flat phone rang. Everyone looked out into the hallway as if they were expecting someone else to answer it.

‘That’s weird,’ said Teddy, ‘Usually we just ring _out_ on that phone. Not sure who that could be..?’

Elio shrugged, ‘I’ll get it.’

He slid off the bed as the phone continued to ring, and meandered out into the hallway to pick it up.

‘ _Ciao?_ ’ he said into the line.

‘Elio!’ came the instantly relieved voice of his mother down the phone line; she sounded panicked.

‘ _Mama, è tutto a posto?_ ’ Elio asked, echoing her worried tone and wondering what was going on.

‘I’m fine!’ she said, ‘But we saw the news and I was so worried.’

‘News?’ asked Elio perplexed, ‘What did you see?’

‘About the riot that went on…’ she said, ‘There was so much damage – millions of pounds -, and the fatalities meant that it made the news over here,’

‘Wait, what, fatalities?’ asked Elio shocked, ‘People died?’

‘ _Si_ , three people were caught up in a stampede,’ she said, ‘One died on the scene and two later in the hospital.’

‘ _Mi Dio_ ’ breathed Elio, ‘I didn’t know.’

‘Are you okay?’ she asked again.

‘Yes,’ he said, ‘I was there, but we got out. Please don’t panic.’

She was quiet for a moment, ‘Alright. _Alright_ ’

‘Is _papa_ there?’ asked Elio.

‘Yes,’ she said, ‘He’s listening.’

‘We were watching the election results when everything started,’ said Elio, ‘Alana got hit by a beer bottle, but other than that we were alright.’

‘Is she alright?’ she asked.

‘She’ll be okay,’ said Elio, ‘I think she’s just a bit shaken up. Whitney, the med student we live with, had been keeping an eye on her; but she’s fine.’

‘That’s good,’ she said, ‘We were just so worried. I’m glad you’re okay _Elly_.’

‘Thanks for ringing,’ he said softly, ‘We were surprised when this phone rang.’

‘We had to look back through the phone log to get the number,’ said his mum, ‘It took a bit of sleuthing. We’ve written it down now.’

Elio chuckled lightly, ‘I’m looking forward to seeing you. It’s nice to hear your voice. I miss you.’

‘Us too _Elly_ ,’ she said gently, ‘We just wanted to make you were okay. We love you and we’ll see you soon.’

‘See you soon _mama_ ’ he said softly, ‘Give _papa_ a kiss from me.’

‘Will do,’ she said, ‘Bye _Elly belly_.’

With that she hung up the phone and Elio turned around to head back into Alana’s bedroom and to join the rest of the group. He couldn’t shake the idea that three people had died last night; he could see that it was escalating, but hadn’t thought it would lead to people _dying_. To be honest, he hadn’t really been thinking about a lot, other than getting himself, Alana and Rory to safety. He shook his head to try and shake the slightly guilty he feeling he had in his gut. Deep down he knew that there was no way that those deaths were in anyway his fault, but somehow, he felt deeply saddened that it had happened. He heaved a sigh and then headed back into the bedroom.

**

He didn’t see Oliver the following day, but Oliver had told him to be ready at 6pm on Monday night. He didn’t tell him where they were going, other than it was his treat, and to dress up a little. At half past five Elio was standing in front of his bedroom mirror, critically looking at his reflection.

‘You look good,’ said Whitney; who was sitting on his bed, half-reading a medical textbook, but really paying attention to what he was doing.  

‘Do you think I need a better shirt?’ Elio asked.

‘What’s that one made of?’ asked Whitney. Elio frowned at the slightly odd question.

‘Errr,’ said Elio, looking at the label, ‘Cotton?’

Whitney rolled her eyes and slid off the bed, putting her book on the duvet cover. She opened his wardrobe and rifled through the shirts that were hanging there. She pulled one out a few moments later and held it up. It was pale blue, with a delicate pattern on it.

‘This one,’ she said, ‘It brings out the green of your eyes; and it’s also 75% silk, so it feels really nice,’

‘My mum says that about that one,’ said Elio, unbuttoning the shirt he was currently wearing and tossing it over the back of his desk chair before reaching for the shirt Whitney was holding. He felt zero qualms about stripping down in front of Whit; why would he? To start with he was currently getting ready for a date with a _guy_ , and second, if there were to ever go swimming or to the beach, she would see him in far less than a pair of skinny jeans and trainers. What was the difference?

‘Much better,’ she said, when he’d buttoned it up and partially tucked it in to his waistband, ‘Nonchalant. Sexy.’

Elio laughed and gave her a little shove, ‘Thanks for your help Whit.’

‘Ooh!’ she said, ‘Wait a second.’

She reached for the eyeliner that he’d put down on the desk and picked it up.

‘Sit down,’ she said pushing him back towards the bed, so that she could actually reach his face with ease. She was about a foot shorter than him; so without him sitting it would be difficult for her to do this with any particular skill.

‘Look up,’ she instructed, and began to pencil underneath his waterline. A few moments later she was done.

‘Perfect,’ she said, and gestured to the mirror. He got to his feet and looked. Even if he thought it himself, he did look hot. Whitney had done his eyeliner better than he ever could, so that his eyes looked bigger than normal, and the black set off the intensity of the green. He finished it off the silky shirt and skinny jeans with a long coat and converse trainers. He’d also messed up his hair with some sort of product that Teddy had given him so that he looked like he’d just been running in a wind tunnel, but in a sexy way of course.

‘Thanks Whit,’ he said again, smiling at her in the mirror.

She shrugged, ‘Not a problem.’

A moment later the buzzer to the flat door rang. Elio grabbed his wallet and keys from his desk and shoved them into his coat pockets.

‘Elio!’ yelled Zoe from the kitchen, ‘Your carriage is here to take you to the ball!’

Elio chuckled, blushing slightly, before yelling, ‘Thanks Zoe!’

He bid Whit goodbye and hurried out of the flat, down the stairs, taking them two at a time. He opened the front door of the flat and was greeted by Oliver, with his hands in his coat pockets, his blond hair shining in the glow of the nearest street light. He looked _gorgeous_. Elio was intensely thankful that he’d allowed Whitney to mess with his look. He needed all the help he could get to keep up with this perfect specimen that had, for some reason, decided to spend time with him.

‘Wow,’ said Oliver as he looked Elio up and down, ‘You look sexy as hell,’

Elio shivered at the desire in his voice, ‘Thank you. You scrub up quite well yourself.’

That was the understatement of the century. In his blue jeans and white shirt, Oliver looked like he’d stepped straight off the pages of an American Eagle advert.

‘Are you going to tell me where we’re going yet?’ he asked as he stepped out and shut the door behind him. Oliver took his hand and they stepped away down the street.

‘No,’ he said, ‘It’s a surprise. I hope you’ll like it though.’

Elio smiled, ‘I’m sure I will. I’m with you.’

Oliver chuckled under his breath before he let go of Elio’s hand momentarily and stepped out onto the street to hail down a taxi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everyone who gave feedback on the last chapter - it really really means the world to me. I love you guys. <3 <3 <3 
> 
> This chapter is a bit slower (hence the title), but the next chapter was too important to rush, so this one will have to see you through until I've got that one sorted. I hope you like it! xxx


	20. Crash Into Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well this chapter is as mushy and romantic as it gets... sorry if that doesn't float your boat, I was clearly just feeling the love this week!
> 
> I do sometimes wonder if I should rate this story as 'E' as well, but the way I figured it is that 'M' kind of covers sort of regular sex etc. whilst 'E' is reserved for the more hardcore kinky stuff/violence that you can get in some fics. Does that make sense? 'M' to me still means 'adult'... am I correct in thinking like that? 
> 
> Anyway, this chapter definitely fits in with my "smutty Sunday" mantra... hope you enjoy! 
> 
> Also, you'll notice that this story now has a final number of chapters. I've got the rest of the story mapped out, so we're definitely coming up towards the climax (pun firmly intended) of the story. Hold onto your hats ladies and germs as it's about to get rough aboard this boat! 
> 
> Let me know what you think - your feedback means the absolute world to me! <3 Also - over 110 subscribes and 300+ kudos - thank you! You guys rock!! <3 <3 <3
> 
> V  
> xxx

‘Where are we going?’ said Elio, giggling slightly as his hands stretched in front of him in an instinct not to walk into anything. He was currently walking blind, as Oliver had his hands over his eyes.

‘You’ll see in a moment,’ said Oliver, ‘Just a bit further. Up a step… and again.’

Elio followed his instructions gingerly. He had to trust Oliver completely that he wouldn’t let him stumble. He could hear other people around them, and wondered whether he looked utterly stupid, but then decided he actually didn’t care all that much. The only person around who he actually cared what they thought was the one currently doing this to him; so that was all that mattered.

‘Alright, we’re here,’ said Oliver, taking his hands away from Elio’s eyes. Elio blinked a few times as light flooded back into his retinas after his walk in the dark.

‘Holy shit!’ said Elio, unable to help himself as his mouth fell open. They were in front of the hotel restaurant of quite possibly one of the swankiest hotels in New York. There was the sound of a jazz piano pouring out of the open double doors, and the light hum of people talking from within, along with the clinking of cutlery and glasses.

‘Do you like it?’ asked Oliver, his voice nervous, ‘It’s not too much is it?’

‘Oliver it’s amazing!’ said Elio, his eyes wide as he tried to take it all in.

‘Can I take your name please Sir?’ asked the maître d', standing behind a rostrum with bookings on it.

‘Yes, it’s Davis, for two,’ said Oliver. The man looked down his list of names.

‘Right this way, I have a booth as you requested,’ said the man, gesturing them in to the restaurant.

Elio was blown away. He’d been to posh restaurants and hotels before with his parents, but not in quite a while. These days the preferred the relaxed feel of the country to going to academic conferences where they might have had chances to stay in places like this. He looked up at the ceiling where two ginormous chandeliers cast dancing lights over the interior of the restaurant, catching the mirrors and cut glass of the crystal glasses.

He was so glad he’d worn the silk shirt that Whitney had picked out for him.

‘Is this table alright for you sirs?’ asked the host as they reached their table.

‘It’s perfect,’ said Oliver, ‘Thank you.’

‘Can I take your jackets, and then the wine waiter will be over momentarily,’ said the host, allowing them to shuck off their jackets and hand them to him, before they took their seats in the booth.

There were three candles burning in the centre of the table, and the place settings meant that they were sat diagonally from each other, knee-to-knee, rather than opposite each other like a normal table would have afforded.

‘This is incredible,’ said Elio looking around, ‘How did you get a table here? I’d heard that there were really long wait lists.’

Oliver smiled, ‘Well, let’s just say that I know the hotel manager from our PhD days together, and he’s owed me a favour regarding a tight spot with a girl that I got him out of, pretty much ever since. I pulled some strings and he managed to get us a table and… and I really hope you don’t mind, or think it’s too much… but I got us a room here tonight.’

Elio’s eyebrows rose in shock, and for a moment he thought he might cry, ‘Oh, uh, wow, Oliver. That’s amazing. I don’t really know what to say…’

Oliver shrugged slightly, putting his hand on top of Elio’s on the table.

‘I didn’t get you anything though,’ said Elio, still struggling a little bit for what to say. No-one had ever done anything like this for him before.

Oliver shook his head, ‘I didn’t even know I was going to do this until a week ago. It’s just a date.’

Elio’s eyebrows rose again, ‘Yeah, a fucking amazing one.’

‘Well you can think of something to do in the future,’ said Oliver with a chuckle. He looked up as the wine waiter came over to take their order.

‘Errr, what would you recommend?’ asked Oliver.

‘The red wine on the house this evening has been the favourite of guests this evening,’ he said.

‘Alright,’ said Oliver, ‘Let’s try that then.’

The waiter nodded with a smile and disappeared, ‘I’ll be back right away.’

They watched for a moment as the waiter disappeared, winding his way back through the multitude of tables towards the extensive hotel bar.

‘So why now, why today, of all days?’ asked Elio, curiously.

Oliver paused for a second, before answering, ‘It’s going to sound really silly.’

‘I’m sure it won’t,’ said Elio, giggling slightly at Oliver’s nervousness.

Oliver took a deep breath before speaking, ‘Two years ago today, when I was doing research for a book I was writing, I got a phone call from your father telling me that I had been chosen to be their live-in student the following summer; and that I’d be going to stay in Northern Italy for six weeks. I’d only put my application in on the off chance that it might happen. I’d never expected to _actually_ be picked.’

Elio giggled, his eyes wide, ‘Was that really two years ago? It honestly does not seem like that long.’

‘Mmmhmm,’ said Oliver, the candlelight reflecting in the black circles of his pupils, ‘Your dad told me something on the phone that day as well. He’d said that it had been a close-run thing between me and another candidate, and the final decision had come down to their seventeen-year-old son.’

The waiter was back, and poured them both a glass of wine before putting the bottle on the table, and disappearing once again. They had decided on the chef’s special menu for the evening, so there wasn’t any choice, other than vegetarian option or not, which the waiter duly noted before passing the message to another who would take it to the kitchen.

Elio blushed, ‘I remember that. Dad couldn’t decide between you and this French guy, but I definitely preferred you.’

Oliver chuckled throatily, ‘I’m glad.’

‘There was just something about you,’ said Elio with a shrug, ‘Even in that tiny picture that you put on the application.’

‘Well I’m glad I got picked because of the content of my research application, and not because of the way my photo looked,’ said Oliver, grinning across at him.

Elio shrugged, ‘Hey, I’m only human.’

Oliver chuckled and raised his wine glass, ‘Cheers’

‘ _Cin cin_ ,’ said Elio, touching his glass to Oliver’s, ‘Thank you for this.’

They both took a drink before Oliver leaned over and gently pressed his mouth to Elio’s in a soft peck.

‘I remember the first time you showed up at the house,’ said Elio after putting his wine glass down, ‘I was watching the car arrive from an upstairs window. I thought you were very confident. Marzia thought you were gorgeous.’

‘I don’t really remember that first day,’ said Oliver, ‘I was so tired. All I remember is falling into your bed, and then waking up because you dropped a book on the floor… I think?’

‘You remember that?’ Elio giggled, blushing slightly, ‘I didn’t know how to wake you, so I tried to do it inconspicuously.’

‘Not your strong point then,’ said Oliver, as the server came over with their starters.

As they ate they talked about the previous summer, and Elio realised that it was first time that they had _really_ talked about it. During those heady two weeks that they had had together at the end, they hadn’t really spoken about what had come before, because they didn’t want to acknowledge the time that they had wasted or lost. They had just lived each moment through touches and kisses and sex, each second passing by towards the moment they would have to separate. Time had been the enemy, and by _not_ talking they had tried to ignore it. To do the impossible and to stop time. And then when they had reconnected in September, they hadn’t properly revisited that old turf, other than in passing. It had felt like it was too painful, or too terrifying, to remember what they had had and what they could have lost had they not somehow managed to find each other again. Now they could sit and delve into the memories which they shared but had not talked about, like going through an old photo album that one might find under a bed after many years of it lying dormant. They were comfortable enough because the memories were like photographs to be enjoyed, rather than scars that would bleed afresh if they were picked over.

‘That day at the berm…’ said Oliver, ‘When you first kissed me. I felt like my world was going to implode with the number of things that hit me in that moment.’

‘I didn’t really know what I was doing,’ said Elio, ‘I just knew that I wanted to have my mouth on yours, and my hands on your body.’

‘And I wanted to keep kissing you. But I was trying to be good. I wanted to be good,’ said Oliver.

‘And I wanted you to be the exact opposite,’ said Elio with a grin, ‘I seem to have brought you around on that one.’

Oliver chuckled and shrugged slightly, a somewhat guilty look on his face.

‘And then that first night,’ said Oliver, breathing out, ‘Well you know how that went,’

Elio nodded, ‘Yeah.’

‘I was so scared,’ said Oliver quietly.

‘You didn’t seem it,’ said Elio.

Oliver shook his head, ‘I wasn’t scared like that. In fact in that sense I was probably relaxed; I was so happy about what I thought was going to happen. I was just scared for you; I didn’t want to be a mistake that you looked back on and regretted. I wanted it to be so good for you. In that moment and for all the memories after.’

‘And it was,’ said Elio, ‘I mean, I’m not going to lie; it hurt a bit. Spit as lube is definitely not the way forward- ‘

Oliver chuckled and shook his head, ‘No, that’s true.’

‘But it was good, so good in fact I think we did it twice more in the same night?’ said Elio with a grin.

‘Something like that’ said Oliver with an answering smirk.

They spent hours talking whilst they ate through their mains and then shared a dessert. They unpicked each moment they had spent together last summer, talking about what had been, and what could have been. Elio felt as if Oliver was peeling himself open in a way that he hadn’t allowed himself to do last summer. He had gone so far, to allow Elio to see some of him, to be in that physical relationship with him, and to let Elio know that he cared. But he hadn’t allowed Elio into the marrow of his bones, to let him know exactly how he felt about what was happening. That changed in the course of their evening.

It was nearing eleven at night, they’d both finished a cup of coffee, and were sitting almost nose-to-nose in the darkness of their booth, the air singing around them with all that they shared.

‘Do you want to go upstairs?’ asked Oliver throatily, as one of their candles guttered out on the table, ‘I think that’s our queue.’

Elio nodded, leaning forward and pecking him gently on the mouth, ‘Yes, please.’

Oliver didn’t miss the significance that those were the words Elio had spoken to him the first night they’d slept together. Both that first night last summer and the night when they’d got back together in September.

They walked out of the restaurant, one of the last groups of people in there. They headed over to the elevator, Oliver having picked up the room key when he’d disappeared to use the bathroom earlier, and so that he could put their dinner check on the table.

‘Which floor are we on?’ asked Elio as they stepped inside. He turned around, facing away from the mirror that was on the back wall. Why was there always a mirror in a hotel elevator? They always had the worst light, and the reflected image was never flattering.

‘14th,’ said Oliver, pressing the button. There were twenty floors in this hotel, so whilst they weren’t at the top, they were quite high and would have a brilliant view over midtown.

The door slid shut, and the elevator started to move upwards. Elio grinned across at Oliver, who was stood on the other side of the lift, his hands on the rail that ran around the edge.

‘You’re so cliché,’ said Oliver, reading Elio’s thoughts.

‘And?’ asked Elio, quickly stepping towards him, and placing his hands either side of Oliver’s on the rail, ‘They’re clichés for a reason; because loads of people think it’s a good idea.’

Oliver started to giggle, but was cut off by Elio capturing his mouth in a rough kiss, demanding the same passion and desire in return. Elio felt like he might burst; that Oliver had given so much of himself tonight – just in allowing him to hear everything that that he had felt about what had passed between them. Elio had listened to the words, had tasted them on his tongue, and now he wanted to consume the man who had uttered them. To let him know that he was utterly safe in his arms, and that nothing could match what he felt in that moment.

His kiss left Oliver gasping, his lips beginning to swell marked with Elio’s desire, as the elevator door dinged, announcing they had arrived on the fourteenth floor. They hurried along the corridor, looking for their room. Like most hotel corridors it was somewhat of a rabbit warren and their room seemed to be down several right turns and at the end of another little offshoot.

Oliver put the key in the lock and opened the door, exposing the blackness in front of them. He flicked the light on, and the room was flooded with warmth.

‘Wow,’ said Elio, stepping into the room. It was beautiful; even though – for this hotel – it was one of their “standard” doubles. The bed was _huge_ , made up with black and white covers, with what seemed like hundreds of cushions. There was a small sitting area with a little couch and a coffee table. The double wardrobe took up a large space on the back wall along with a free-standing mirror. The bathroom was off to the right. Elio kicked off his shoes near the door, before walking in and properly looking around.

‘Wahey!’ Elio laughed as he threw himself onto the massive bed. He bounced as he hit the layers of the covers and nearly fell off the other side.

‘Idiot,’ laughed Oliver, flicking on the bedside lights so that he could turn the main light off. The room instantly softened.

Elio leaned up on his elbows, looking at Oliver standing near the door to the room. He couldn’t quite believe that this was his reality in this moment; it seemed like something that he would have dreamed of last summer; something that would never have become a reality. Elio reached down and popped the button open on the top of his black jeans. That was all the encouragement that Oliver needed. He walked to the bed and knelt up on the edge, encouraging Elio to spread his legs so that he could get comfortable in the cradle of his hips.

Elio leaned up to capture Oliver’s mouth in another searing kiss, his hand going to the back of Oliver’s head to tug slightly on his hair. He knew that that turned the older man on, and the groan that escaped Oliver’s lips into Elio’s mouth only confirmed this.

‘I want to worship every inch of you,’ Oliver murmured against Elio’s throat, making him mewl slightly in anticipation, and rub himself against the man on top of him.

‘ _Oh God,_ ’ whispered Elio, ‘ _Oliver…_ ’

Oliver proceeded to do exactly as he had promised, taking his time to make love to Elio’s body. He started by slowly unbuttoning Elio’s shirt, littering kisses along his collarbone, and then down his sternum, ribs, and to his naval, as each button came undone, exposing the expanse of pale skin underneath. Elio lay, watching him with hooded eyes, as Oliver ran his warm hands inside the shirt and around Elio’s ribs and up his back, encouraging him to slide the material off. It fell to the floor with a flutter of silk.

Elio groaned and arched his hips up as Oliver slowly worked his hand past the waistband of his jeans and boxers, making use of the fact that Elio had helpfully unbuttoned his jeans earlier. Oliver stopped with his hand just resting above Elio’s cock, where he needed it the most. Oliver leaned down to kiss him again, his mouth soft and insistent against Elio’s. Elio, for his part, reached around Oliver’s back, trying to pull him closer if that were possible. He felt like he wanted to meld the two of them together; to be as close as he possibly could be to the other man. He gasped into the kiss as Oliver took him in his hand and began to stroke him, causing Elio to push his hips up into the touch.

‘ _Off’_ murmured Oliver, removing his hand, causing Elio to whine at the loss. Oliver made short work of his jeans, underwear and socks, leaving him completely naked to his gaze. Oliver was still fully clothed, other than his shoes. Elio found he didn’t mind overly much though. Oliver then continued to do as he had promised; kissing every single spot of Elio’s skin that he could reach. He started with areas that were not particularly erogenous, before slowly progressing to Elio’s neck, his nipples, the skin of his hipbones, worshipping each mark, freckle or contour with his tongue, his lips, his fingertips. Before Oliver’s mouth even reached his cock or his hole, Elio was a mess on the bed, begging Oliver to _get inside him_.

Oliver made short work of his own clothes, knowing that Elio would be zero help in that matter as he lay glassy eyed upon the cover, panting like he had just run a race. Elio was vaguely paying attention as he saw Oliver grab the lube and a condom out of his jeans pocket. Some part of his brain that was still functioning thought that they would soon be gone; he’d been tested a few weeks ago, and he knew that Oliver had done the same. They were both just waiting on the results.

Elio watched as Oliver knelt up in front of him, encouraging him to put his legs on Oliver’s shoulders. In this position it was just the back of his ankles on Oliver’s shoulders because of how Oliver was kneeling up, but he knew that when Oliver moved, pressing and _fucking_ him into the mattress, it would be his knees. He didn’t mind; he was flexible. Elio gasped as he felt Oliver start to open him up with one finger after tracing it around his hole.

‘It’s cold,’ he giggled, as Oliver cocked an eyebrow in his direction at his gasp.

‘It’ll get warmer,’ said Oliver, slowly moving his finger in and out, before adding another, stretching Elio to accommodate him.

‘ _More_ ’ whined Elio, panting slightly as Oliver added a third finger, crooking them upwards in search of Elio’s prostate. He knew exactly when he’d found it because Elio pushed his head back into the mattress and gasped out _oh fuck_ whilst also pushing his hips down onto Oliver’s hand, begging him wordlessly to _do that again_. He did; several times more, watching as Elio’s cock began to weep precome onto his stomach.

Oliver removed his fingers, before quickly rolling on the condom and lining himself up. Elio felt him push in slowly, letting him feel every inch as their bodies moulded together like molten glass melting in a furnace. Elio’s knees were by his ears as Oliver pushed forward, his mouth millimetres from Elio’s, allowing them to kiss hotly as Oliver bottomed out a moment later.

As Oliver began to rock slowly, Elio couldn’t begin to describe what he was thinking or feeling adequately. Apart from the fact that his brain seemed to have vacated his body momentarily, he almost felt like he wanted to cry out with the intensity of the fire that was coursing through him. His body took over, and he rolled his hips back into Oliver, a delicious, gorgeous, heavenly rhythm beating out a cadence in the sound of skin on skin. He closed his eyes as Oliver’s cock rubbed his prostate again and again and again. The pleasure tightening in his belly causing him to pant out his desire against Oliver’s mouth in between their searching kisses and the minutes of their moving bodies.  

‘ _Look at me,’_ Oliver growled, the desperate need pouring into every syllable. Elio could barely open his eyes as he keened, his head thrown back in submission as Oliver moved his mouth to his throat, biting and sucking in a way that was sure to leave marks.

‘ _I want to see your pretty eyes when you cum_ ’ Oliver said, quickening his pace. Elio could barely react at all; all he could feel was his cock rubbing against Oliver’s lower stomach as he moved, and Oliver inside of him, their bodies as close as it was possible for two bodies to be. Oliver dipped his head to kiss him again, drawing his bottom lip into his mouth, before gently biting on it. Elio’s eyes flicked up to Oliver’s seeing himself outlined in the blackness of the pupil dilated with desire, ringed with that cobalt blue he found so beautiful. Elio moved his hands to the back of Oliver’s neck, holding onto him like a drowning man might hold onto a wooden raft, his toes curling as the ball of pleasure grew within him.

He didn’t know who came first, he just knew that it was within milliseconds of each other. Oliver’s face as he came was a gorgeous picture of sated desire, as he pushed deeply into Elio’s body, his primal instinct to be as tight within him as was physically possible as he spilled out his release into the condom at the same time that Elio cried out his own pleasure between their bodies, his body a twitching, shuddering delight.

They lay pressed together for a few more moments as they both came down from the intensity of the high they had just reached, the sweat cooling on their bodies, before Oliver rolled away, leaving Elio lying on his back staring at the ceiling.

 _‘Fuck me,_ ’ he breathed to no one in particular as his thoughts slowly returned to him. He felt utterly boneless, pushed down into the mattress. He vaguely felt Oliver drop a towel next to him, and he half-heartedly used it to clean himself up before tossing it down the side of the bed. Then Oliver was back beside him as they worked their way under the covers. They didn’t sleep, or speak, for a long while. They just lay there; Elio’s face curled in to Oliver’s shoulder, their legs entwined. They didn’t need to speak, to describe, or to state.

They both knew.


	21. Pulling Together

When Elio awoke the next morning the bed beside him was empty. He could feel it before he opened his eyes, and before the sleep completely left his mind; the indent was also cold when he reached for the space, suggesting that Oliver had left the sheets some time ago. He blearily opened his eyes and sat up; spotting Oliver sitting in one of the chairs in the small sitting area, a cigarette in between the fingers of his right hand, staring into the middle distance. Elio rarely saw Oliver smoke; and he knew that when he did, it was because he was mulling something over in his mind.

‘Morning,’ Oliver spoke first, clearly having seen Elio move from the corner of his eye. He was wearing only a fluffy white dressing gown, having purloined it from the expansive hotel bathroom.

‘Morning,’ said Elio sleepily, pulling the under sheet around himself before sliding out of bed and padding across the floor to where Oliver sat. He draped his arms around Oliver’s shoulders and pecked him on the cheek. Oliver leaned forward and stubbed his cigarette out in the ashtray where Elio could see at least two more dead ends.

‘Penny for your thoughts?’ he asked softly.

Oliver looked up at him, a brief smile flashing across his lips before it was gone again.

‘Yeah, sorry, I’ve been up a while,’ said Oliver, ‘Just thinking things over…’

‘Like..?’ asked Elio, trying to press his lover into telling him exactly what was bothering him.

Oliver shifted slightly before answering, ‘I’m going to tell Naomi.’

Elio’s mouth fell open in surprise before he could help himself. That was not the answer he’d been expecting. He’d expected Oliver to say something about work, or a research project he was working on. He straightened up and moved around to sit in one of the chairs opposite Oliver, so that he could look at him properly. Clearly this was a conversation that was going to require his full attention.  

‘Um, okay, why? What changed your mind?’ said Elio cautiously.  

Oliver shrugged one shoulder before speaking, ‘Last night, I realised something with complete and utter clarity. You were asleep and I was just lying in the dark. I could hear you breathing steadily, in and out, and then you made this cute little noise as you began to dream. I looked across at you, but couldn’t see your face as you were turned away from me, and I just thought _this is what I want_. I want to be with you. I could spend the rest of my life listening to that cute little noise you make when you dream. That is… if you’ll have me?’

Elio was speechless. It was if he heard Oliver’s speech in slow motion; each of the words peppering his brain individually as he desperately tried to link them up and totally understand what Oliver was saying. Oliver’s face remained impassive as he waited for Elio to speak – it was almost as if he let any emotion show, then he would completely break. That in itself was heart-breaking. Elio knew that it had taken so much for Oliver to let his walls down for him, to let him in. He’d spent his entire life trying to be the image of the _perfect American man_ , while his body and mind was screaming at him that that wasn’t him, that that wasn’t who he was supposed to be. He’d been pushed and moulded by circumstance and by family, until he’d had a chance to do something different one summer. He deserved for Elio to be kind to him. To give him that the best that he could. 

Then Elio spoke, ‘Of course I’ll have you. I have wanted you since the moment I saw you – even if I didn’t know it at first.’

He swallowed, his tongue feeling altogether too big for his mouth as he mentioned the elephant in the room, ‘But what about the baby? Your family?’

Oliver nodded, ‘I know. I honestly don’t know what is going to happen. But I have to be honest with Naomi. I need to do this for all of us; it’s not fair to her or the baby to live with someone who is living a lie; who is constantly wishing he were in the arms of another. It’s going to be really really difficult. I don’t know what the outcome will be. I know her; I know what she said; but this is different. I don’t know how she’ll take this. And I’m _fucking_ terrified.’

‘I’ll help,’ said Elio earnestly, ‘In any way you need me to. I’ll be there.’

‘Thank you’ Oliver breathed, his face relaxing somewhat. Each second that passed Oliver looked better, as if by telling Elio what he was going to do he felt the weight lifting from his shoulders. Just by putting his plan out into the world, it had solidified into something that he couldn’t take back, even if he had any desire to do so. Which he didn’t.

‘Now,’ said Elio, looking at his wrist, as if perusing an invisible wristwatch. He made a face as if he was thinking for a moment or two.

‘What?’ asked Oliver, the corner of his mouth raising in the beginnings of a smirk.

Elio stood up and then went over to him, sitting on his lap, facing him with his knees either side of Oliver’s legs. Oliver’s hands went to his sides, under the cape that sheet was creating around his body, stroking up and down the warm skin beneath.

‘I believe that we have this room for at least another three hours before we have to check out,’ said Elio, interspersing his words with soft kisses, ‘Wanna make the most of it?’

Oliver looked into his eyes seriously for a moment, and for a brief sickening flash Elio thought he was going to tell him _no_. That he’d just decided to irrevocably change his life and that he wasn’t in the mood. But then a smile overtook the whole of Oliver’s face and he bodily lifted Elio as he stood up, holding onto his hips as Elio wrapped his legs around Oliver’s waist, the sheet getting tangled around them. Oliver nearly tripped after taking a step, causing Elio to let out a little shriek at the near-death-experience.

‘Yeah, if I don’t fall flat on my fucking face first,’ said Oliver, his voice full of laughter and fake annoyance, finally kicking the sheet free from his bare feet. Elio blew a raspberry into Oliver’s collarbone, causing the blond man to laugh, and attempt to tickle him one handed. Elio giggled with delight as Oliver dumped him unceremoniously on his back on the bed, before swiftly ditching his dressing gown and coming to join him.  

**

They left the hotel just after eleven am, going their separate ways to find fresh clothes (Elio clearly hadn’t brought anything with him, not knowing exactly where he was going). He headed back to the apartment and managed to get back to his room without running into anybody. Not that it would have mattered to him if had done. He had no classes today, they were all on “study leave” for this last week, so that they could get their essays done. Apparently, this was something only freshman got in their first semester, to make it that bit easier for them to adjust to college life. It didn’t matter one iota to Elio who’d finished all of his essays at the end of last week. He’d not turned them in yet, but he didn’t have to do that until the following week, so he figured he’d wait and see if any last-minute epiphanies occurred to him which would completely blow his tutor’s minds. He doubted it though.

He threw his evening clothes in the laundry basket and pulled on a ratty t-shirt, and sweatpants before lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling. He was thinking about what Oliver had said earlier. In all truthfulness it made him nervous. Not because of what Oliver was suggesting; his heart fluttered when he thought about waking up each morning next to that man, but because of everything Oliver could potentially lose. It was terrifying. He didn’t want him to lose anything because of him. He wanted him to have everything he deserved. For obvious reasons he would never be able to give Oliver a family; he didn’t want to deny him that because of his own selfishness.  

A moment later there was a timid knock at the door.

‘Elio? You decent?’

‘Yeah Whit,’ he said, recognising the voice, ‘Come in.’

‘Nice night?’ she said with a grin.

Elio smirked in her direction, ‘I am not giving you dirty details.’

‘I _do not want_ to hear about it,’ said Whitney rolling her eyes, ‘As long as you had a good time.’

‘It was ah-mazing,’ said Elio as Whitney sat down on the end of the bed, ‘Probably due to your eyeliner.’

‘Definitely,’ said Elio, ‘Anyway, enough of my eyeliner; what’s up?’

The door burst open again and Alana appeared, ‘Is he going to do it?’

‘I haven’t even asked him yet!’ said Whitney, ‘I literally got in here like 30 seconds ago.’

‘Well Katie from downstairs is freaking out, she’s in floods of tears in our kitchen cause she thinks this is all going to be a disaster before we’ve even started…’ said Alana hurriedly, ‘At least if we could get Elio to play that would be one less thing to think about.’

‘Whoa, whoa, whoa,’ said Elio, ‘Will someone please explain to me what the fuck is going on? What happened?’

‘Well I was trying to tell you,’ said Whit, shooting Alana a dirty look, ‘And didn’t really want to ruin your good mood from last night.’

‘But something tells me it’s going to be ruined anyway,’ said Elio, looking between them, ‘What is going on?’

‘Something happened to Hannah from downstairs,’ said Whit, ‘She was walking home last night and some jerk-offs set upon her.’

‘What the fuck?!’ asked Elio sitting up straight, his mouth open in horror, ‘Why? Why would they do that? Is she okay?!’

‘We don’t know,’ said Whitney, ‘And no she’s not, that’s why we’re talking about it.’

‘She’s one of the new scholarship holders for this year,’ said Alana, ‘She comes from a poorer-economic background, and had to compete to get a place. It means that well…’

‘She doesn’t have a lot of money,’ said Whitney, ‘And Katie – her friend who is currently crying in our kitchen – is worried she isn’t going to have enough to cover the medical bills.’

‘She’s in the hospital?’ asked Elio.

Whitney nodded, ‘Yeah; in the ICU.’

‘Holy fuck,’ said Elio, scrambling to assemble his thoughts, ‘That’s terrible. Right, so why do you need me?’

‘We’re organising a fundraiser for Friday night,’ said Whitney, ‘And you said that you can play piano, right?’

‘Yeah I can,’ said Elio nodding vehemently, ‘Do you want me to play?’

‘If you would?’ said Alana

‘Absolutely,’ said Elio, ‘Do the cops have anything on who did it?’

‘No,’ said Whitney, ‘Other than that they seemed to be targeting Hannah specifically. Loads of other people, wearing way more expensive stuff came down that road last night and they weren’t touched. They were just after her. They didn’t take anything either; just beat on her and then left her there.’

Elio winced, and his stomach rolled with a sick-feeling, ‘That’s awful.’

Neither of the girls spoke, ‘So other than this, we didn’t really know what to do to help.’

‘I’m in,’ said Elio, sliding off the bed, ‘Come on then, let’s go get a plan together.’

**

‘Are you sure you’re alright doing this?’ asked Elio, as he held Oliver’s jacket, ‘I mean, Zoe’s got a motor-mouth. I’m sure she could host.’

Oliver smiled softly, ‘I said I would, so I will. The cops reckon this specifically to do with the fact that Hannah is one of the new scholarship holders. There’s something seriously twisted going on at the moment, and people with some fucked up ideas are acting on them. If I can help in any way, then I will.’

‘Okay,’ Elio breathed, ‘I’m kinda nervous.’

‘It’ll be fine,’ said Oliver, ‘We’ve got the raffle, you playing, the bachelor auction, the quiz, and the bar. I’m sure we’ll raise enough to cover Hannah’s costs.’

Elio nodded, ‘Yeah, okay. Alright, let’s get out there and see how many people have actually turned up.’

They left the small room that was normally used for the wait staff’s break room. After asking around a bit, Elio had thought about using the coffee shop venue with the set up for open-mics where he had come with Oliver about six weeks previously. As they were usually closed on Friday nights (running open mic nights during the week), they were happy to let them have the space. Once they’d heard what it was for they let them have the space for free, and said that they would put on a bar at cost price – all the profits would go to the fund.

‘Oh wow,’ said Oliver, as they stepped out into the main room. It was packed with people; students and academics alike. The only way they’d been able to drum up noise about this event was to literally go door-to-door, to coffee shops around campus, to people’s flats, to bars, and to popular student hang outs in order to talk to people. It seemed that people had listened.

‘Alright, let’s do this,’ said Oliver. Elio could tell that he was taking more to himself than to anybody else at that particular moment, and that no response was required.

‘Your mic is all ready for you up on the stand Oliver,’ said Rory, appearing next to them.

‘Mic?’ asked Elio, somewhat amazed.

‘Well yeah,’ said Rory, ‘There’s a lot of people in here; to be heard he’s going to need a mic.’

‘It’s okay,’ said Oliver, ‘I’ve used them at conferences before, it just sounds weird as hell the first time you hear your own voice through a microphone.’

‘I’ll bet,’ said Elio.

‘Your piano is mic’ed too for later,’ said Rory with a shrug, ‘But obviously you won’t be speaking, so that’s not a problem.’

Oliver squeezed his arm; as much public affection as they could risk in a room that was sure to have Oliver’s peers in it. At least until Oliver had had a chance to see through the decision he had made earlier that week. He then disappeared and headed up to the stage; mounting the three steps it took, so that he was next to the mic and could be seen at the front of the room.

‘Good Evening Ladies and Gentleman,’ Oliver said smoothly into the microphone, allowing a few moments for the buzz of chatter to die down.

‘Some of you may know me as Professor Davis, but everyone else calls me Oliver, or at least everyone who likes me. I’m sure those who don’t have something far less pleasant to call me,’ he said, and a titter of laughter ran through the gathered audience.

‘But enough of the bad jokes,’ he said, ‘We all know why we’re here tonight. It’s because earlier this week, a student at this university, Hannah Williamson, was attacked as she walked home from the library. We don’t know who her attackers were, yet, but the police have a strong suspicion that it was fellow students, and that their motive was the fact that Hannah was one of the new scholarship holders. They specifically targeted her, here, in a place where she should be safe. Where she had come to live and to learn. And now she’s lying in the hospital.’

Oliver paused as the audience digested this information, a grim but stoic mood settling over the room.

‘I do have some good news, however, and some of you might not yet be aware,’ he said, ‘Today Hannah was moved out of the Intensive Care Unit, and into her own private room. She has been downgraded from a critical case, although she is still in a medically induced coma until the doctors are sure that it is safe to try and bring her around. The doctors are cautiously optimistic about her condition, and she is improving each day.’

There was a collective sigh of relief around the room, and a few people murmured their pleasure to their neighbours at this news. Elio had known about this update, having been told by Katie earlier that day. It was still good to hear it though.

‘There has been a stink of ill-will pervading this university this term,’ Oliver continued, ‘Most of it directed at minorities, or those who are new beneficiaries of what is now a much fairer system. Oftentimes this ill-will has aligned itself with various political groups, and come out daubed with the black mark of fascism as the banner behind which it can hide itself. As we are all gathered in this room to raise money for Hannah’s fund, I am making the calculated assessment that we all have the collective mindset to stand against fascism and hate wherever we will find it.’

There was a murmur of assent around the room as Oliver paused again, with someone shouting ‘damn straight!’ from the back of the room, causing a ripple of laughter.

‘This is more important than ever in this time where it seems like the politics of hate has started to raise its ugly face again. We cannot just sit idly by and let it run rampant in a place where students come to open their minds, supposedly in a place which will keep them safe and let them discover who there are and identities on their own terms. None of our students, staff, visitors – or anyone else in this city for that matter – should be at risk because of how much money they have, which god they worship, the colour of their skin, or who they choose to love. It’s our job as a supposedly enlightened collective to speak up against hate wherever we see it, and to fight it at every turn,’ Oliver spoke, his hands firmly shoved in his pockets, but his voice and eyes alight with the sincerity of every word that he was saying, ‘Well, that’s my rousing speech for the evening. I hope you will all dig deep in your wallets this evening for Hannah’s medical fund. I’ll stop talking for now – although you will hear from me later – and pass you over to the lovely Rory, who will be taking you through the quiz that you signed up for as you came in. Get into your teams’ ladies and gentlemen; may the best nerdy academics win!’

There was more laughter, and the gathered crowd began to clap, as Oliver vacated the stage, making space for Rory to come and stand before the mic, her quizzing clipboard in her hand. The clapping continued as Oliver stepped down the three steps and came to rejoin Elio where he was stood at the back of the room with Alana, Katie and Teddy.

‘How was that?’ he asked as he managed to squeeze in next to them as Rory kicked off the quiz by explaining the rules.

‘Amazing,’ said Elio, ‘Well done.’

‘Great speech Oliver,’ said Teddy nodding, ‘Almost made me want to take to the streets as a vigilante or something.’

Oliver chuckled, ‘Not quite the angle I was going for. But if it helps people see that there is a serious problem around here at the moment, then so much the better.’

‘I think it probably did that,’ said Alana, ‘They loved it.’

Oliver smiled in her direction, ‘Alright, have we got our team sheet for the quiz?’

‘Yeah, it’s here,’ said Teddy, motioning to the table top he was stood next to.

‘Feeling competitive?’ asked Elio with a grin at the blond man.

‘It’s a general knowledge quiz,’ said Oliver, ‘Of course I’m competitive. We have to win this!’

Elio giggled, and then turned to watch Rory as she announced the first category ‘Popular Music’ to a collective groan from the gathered academics, and sounds of interest and delight from the students who were also packed into the room.

‘Well, I know jack shit about popular music,’ said Teddy, ‘Do you want a drink Oliver, before you have to go up again?’

‘Yes please,’ said Oliver, ‘Rum and coke please’

‘Sure,’ said Teddy, ‘Anybody else?’

Elio motioned to the drink he’d already got, and Alana politely declined. Teddy disappeared off into the crowd in the direction of the bar. In the darkness of the crowded room, Elio reached for Oliver’s hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. He could feel that, despite his calm outer demeanour, his heartrate was up; he could feel the blood pounding beneath the fingers that he held. Elio shot Oliver a look in place of the kiss he really wanted to give him. Oliver smiled back, understanding, giving his hand a replying squeeze.

The rest of the evening went swimmingly well, and they absolutely smashed the target for Hannah’s fund when they counted it all up at the end of the evening. Elio’s piano playing was extremely well received; with the audience sitting in enraptured quiet as he played three pieces; Liszt, a piece by Shostakovich, and another by Chopin. The raffle and the bachelor’s auction were also good fun, although Elio was taken by surprise when someone yelled ‘I’ll give $100 for the pianist!’. Not being part of the auction in the first place, Elio had looked about to see who had yelled. He caught Oliver’s eye, he looked both parts amused and also a tiny bit jealous.

‘Ah, unfortunately are delectable pianist isn’t part of the auction as he is off-the-market,’ said Alana, who was running the auction, ‘So therefore doesn’t qualify as a “bachelor”.’

There a murmur of disappointment from some of the gathered bidders, and Elio blushed furiously, waiting for Alana to move on, so the attention could pass on. She delayed for a few seconds more than strictly necessary, just to ensure that Elio was firmly embarrassed. He made a mental note to get her back in some way later.

It was gone midnight before the event came to a close, and the organising group were thoroughly worn out by the time the venue had cleared out and they cleaned up. They caught a taxi back to the flat with the money after counting it, ready to give to Hannah’s parents the next day, and for them to decide what to do with the excess. They had already decided that anything that was left would go back into the scholarship fund, but they would be given the excess anyway to do with as they would whilst Hannah was still in hospital.

Oliver didn’t stay that night. He was going to visit his brother this weekend, as part of a family event, and therefore needed to be away early in the morning. He gave Elio a thorough kiss on the doorstep before disappearing into the night. Elio headed up into the flat after the rest of his flatmates, thoroughly pleased with how the night had gone, and ready to relax with the others before they turned in for the evening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everybody who commented on the last chapter. It means the absolute world to me! <3 <3 It really really makes my day when you guys let me know what you think. 
> 
> Things are beginning to heat up now! Let me know what you think! xxxx


	22. Drown Me Twice

Elio left the doctor’s office with a grin on his face. He couldn’t help it. He’d known, pretty much for certain, what the result was going to be when he’d had the tests done, but it was still nice to have it on paper to be absolutely certain. He didn’t even want to think about what he would have done if the results had been anything other than he’d expected; the thought alone made him feel a little sick, so he pushed it firmly to one side, as he walked onto the street.

He shoved the slip of paper in the back pocket of his jeans and, popping his umbrella up to keep the steady drizzle off him, headed off down the street towards the Classics Department and Oliver’s office. He was teaching late tonight; a postgraduate seminar about research techniques using ancient manuscripts, so Elio had said that he would meet him after hours, after he had been to the late-night surgery call at the doctors. At least that’s what the doctor’s office called it – it wasn’t actually late night, as Elio’s watch confirmed it was only just approaching half-eight. Oliver was due to finish teaching soon.

He headed cautiously up the steps into the entrance hall when he arrived. He knew from past experience – when Rory had nearly gone arse over tit a few weeks ago – that the faux marble was treacherously slippery when wet. He vaguely wondered why it hadn’t been replaced with something a little more appropriate for New York winters, but figured it was just one of those things that everybody learnt to deal with.

Elio headed over to the elevator and pressed up for the eighth floor, leaning against the back, purposefully not looking in the mirror as he rode up. He opened the creaking grille when he got to the top and turned towards Oliver’s office, almost out of muscle memory now. He had to make a conscious effort not to put a skip in his step as he walked down the familiar corridor.

‘Hello Elio,’ said one of the academics, heading in the other direction. They’d seen him around him enough now that they knew his name, and that he appeared to spend a lot of time with Oliver. He was sure that some of them must have put two and two together, but most of them didn’t actually seem to care all that much. Or at least they hadn’t questioned it.

He didn’t even bother knocking when he reached Oliver’s door, but just tried the handle, smiling when it turned and he opened the door. It was new, and heavier than the old one had been, with the handle a bit stiffer, so he actually had to consciously push to open it.

‘Evening,’ said Oliver, looking up as he entered. He had clearly only come back a few minutes before, as his bag was thrown on the floor beside his desk, and he hadn’t yet had a chance to get his work out that he would look at in the morning. He had his sleeves turned up to above the elbow, and his hair was messed up from where he had clearly just run his hands backwards through it. Elio was taken aback, once again, at just how fucking beautiful he was.

‘Did you get them?’ Elio asked without any preamble, pulling the paper out of his back pocket.

‘Yes,’ said Oliver, his face breaking into a grin at Elio’s eagerness (and teenage horniness). He could read exactly what was on Elio’s mind.

‘And?’ asked Elio breathlessly.

‘Negative,’ said Oliver, ‘As we’d thought. But nice to have it confirmed.’

Elio nodded, his own face breaking out into a smirk. Without looking he reached behind him, and clunked the heavy lock into place behind him.

‘Oh, it’s like that is it?’ said Oliver, blue eyes fixed upon him, ‘Can’t even wait until we get back to the apartment?’

‘Well… we’ve never fucked in your office before,’ said Elio, trying to sound as innocent as possible, ‘And there’s nobody about so…’

Oliver chuckled, coming around to the side of the desk that Elio was stood on, pecking him softly on the lips. Elio wasn’t in the mood for soft; it had been four days since he’d last seen Oliver, as the family event had taken all weekend, and he’d still been out of town the previous day. He’d known that there wasn’t going to be any big moves re Naomi at the family event – a bar mitzvah definitely wasn’t the right place to do so. Either way, Oliver had been away, and Elio had needs, needs that could now be satisfied in a way he’d been dreaming about for months. He claimed Oliver’s mouth in a fierce kiss, pulling him in close and deepening the kiss instantly, demanding Oliver do the same. Oliver groaned into the kiss, carding his hands through Elio’s hair, tugging slightly at the soft strands, urging him to keep making those delicious noises.

Elio reached between them without breaking the kiss, and began to rub Oliver over his trousers, feeling the hardness under his hand as he did so. Despite this being Elio’s idea; Oliver was clearly very much on board with the situation. Oliver growled against his neck as he broke away to breathe, before picking him up bodily and sitting him on the desk. Elio moved his hand up and gripped his chin, moving his lips forcibly back onto his in a kiss that had way too much teeth. It didn’t matter though; they weren’t trying to be gentle with each other. They just wanted to be as close as it was physically possible for two human bodies to be; this time without any barriers or restraints. Elio pulled Oliver towards him by the beltloops, grinding their hips together, causing Oliver to pant against his mouth before he pulled Elio off the desk, and after looking into his eyes, just to check it was alright, turned him around, so that his hip bones were digging into the wood.

Elio ground back against Oliver, making him nip at his neck to tell him to behave himself. Elio chuckled and Oliver’s hands moved to his button and zipper on his jeans, undoing them and shoving them with his boxers down over his hips. He didn’t bother removing Elio’s shirt, he just shoved it up his back, planting kisses down his spine. Elio moaned and pressed himself up on his hands, to try and push himself against Oliver’s chest. Oliver growled against the top of his spine, and pushed where his mouth had just been, to make sure Elio was lying flat on the desk, his chest to the wood.

With Oliver’s hand on the back of his neck, Elio couldn’t turn his head to see what he was doing, but he was fairly sure he knew, as he moved the hand on his neck to Elio’s mouth, encouraging him to suck on his fingers.

‘Back pocket,’ Elio huffed, before sucking on the fingers anyway. He felt Oliver search in the back pocket of his jeans which were just down to his mid-thigh and found the packet of lube that he’d put there earlier in the evening. Oliver didn’t say anything, just took his now saliva soaked fingers from Elio’s mouth ( _what? he was going to suck on anything Oliver put in his mouth_ ), and coated them in the lube he’d just found, opening his lover up beneath skilled fingers, causing Elio to gasp and moan as he hurriedly did so.

‘Oliver, hurry up, I want you _in_ me,’ moaned Elio, ‘Like _yesterday._ ’

‘Patience,’ murmured Oliver from above him as Elio shuddered in delight, ‘ _Fuck Elio, how are you so sexy?_ ’

Elio mewled his pleasure at Oliver’s words, but that was cut off by a gasp of delight as Oliver rubbed his prostate, before removing his fingers, causing Elio to whine at the loss.

Then Elio felt Oliver just teasing his entrance. No condom, no latex; just skin.

‘ _Oh god,_ ’ murmured Elio, his forehead pressed against his arms as he tried to keep control of himself, just at the thought of what was about to happen. Oliver didn’t say anything as he pressed forward very carefully; the remainder of the lube slicking the way. He stopped when after an inch or two. Elio’s hands had become fists on the desk as he fought with the intensity of the sensations he was feeling; Oliver raw, Oliver naked, inside of him. It was hot, and heavy, and he could feel Oliver’s blood pounding where their skin touched. The man he loved, inside him, with nothing between them. Elio let out a ragged sob at the intensity of the feeling.

‘ _Oh fuck_ ’ Oliver panted, his hands-on Elio’s hips as he pressed forward again, ‘ _You feel incredible_.’

‘Tell me,’ huffed Elio, as Oliver pressed forward again, another inch or two, ‘Tell me how it feels.’

He heard Oliver take a gulp, before he spoke, his voice barely more than a low growl, ‘ _Like silk._ Like hot, incredibly soft silk, gripping my cock. _Fuck_. It’s…. _incredible_.’

Oliver slid the rest of the way in, stopping when his hips were flush against Elio’s ass. He panted for a moment after he bottomed out, and Elio experimentally rolled his hips, just to see how it felt. It felt like sparks of pleasure were shooting throughout his body, rumbling like the beginning of a firework display, and he had to try and get a grip on himself not to completely lose it.  

‘ _Wait, wait, wait_ ’ huffed Oliver, panting to try and control himself, his warm hands on Elio’s hips, stopping him from moving. Elio whined, his forearms braced on the wood of the desk. He _needed_ to move; this just felt too good not to. He rolled his hips again.

‘ _Stay still!_ ’ Oliver growled, slapping his flank with his right palm, ‘ _Just let me… okay_ … _okay_ ’

Elio couldn’t help but smirk into the skin of his forearm. Oliver needed the time to get himself back in control because it just felt so damn good that if he didn’t, it would all be over before it even started. Just feeling Oliver inside of him, skin to skin, without the intervening layer of latex, nearly had Elio cumming as well. He was glad that the way he was lying, on his front, over the desk, prevented him from reaching his cock. One touch and there is no way he would have been able to hold off.

Then Oliver started to move, and then both moaned in unison; the chorus of their hot breath meeting just like their bodies in the warm air of the office. No matter how much they tried, Elio knew that this wasn’t going to last long; it was just too intense. Not only the feeling, but the very _idea_ that Oliver was completely bare inside of him – that he was as close as he could possibly be. He was occupying his body, and Elio felt like his chest might explode at the very idea.

‘Oh god, Elio, I love you,’ said Oliver, pressing his chest to Elio’s back and licked a stripe up the exposed skin. Elio braced up slightly and twisted awkwardly, craning his neck, so that he could sloppily kiss Oliver, as he continued to move in and out of his body, the sound of skin against skin filling their hearing and all of their senses. Oliver adjusted his angle so that he was hitting Elio’s prostate on every thrust, and Elio’s mind just turned to complete mush. He could have been moaning out his pleasure, he could have been calling on the name of every god that he could recall, but he wasn’t really aware of it. All he knew was that building sensation of pleasure in his lower stomach; growing and growing until he was ready to fall over the edge. He reached behind him to grip Oliver’s hip; to encourage him to be rougher, to drive deeper, harder, to push him over the edge.

‘ _Oliver, gonna cum…’_ he panted a second later.

Oliver growled and simply sucked on the side of his neck, causing Elio to cry out as his orgasm washed over him. He felt like it exploded out of every pore in his body, as his body spasmed with the delight of his release. All Oliver could do was hold on as Elio’s muscles rippled around his cock with the waves of his orgasm, forcing him to follow seconds later. Even in the throws of his own orgasm, Elio felt Oliver’s release deep inside of him; the heat of his desire, released into his body, pressed forward as deeply as he could. The idea alone made another roll of orgasmic delight wash over him. Elio felt like his knees were shaking, and he was glad for Oliver’s weight pinning him to the desk, otherwise he was sure he would have collapsed into a boneless puddle on the floor.

They stayed like that for a moment, before Oliver pulled away, leaving Elio still leaning over the desk getting his breath back. He heard Oliver moan a moment later, as he felt some of Oliver’s release escape on the back of his thigh.

‘ _Fuck…_ you look so… _used_ ,’ said Oliver breathlessly from behind him, ‘It’s so fucking hot.’

Elio moaned softly before he spoke, feeling every inch as used as Oliver could see ‘Err… do you have anything, to like, clean up?’

They hadn’t really thought about that in their haste to have each other. Elio heard Oliver moving around for a moment and then an _aha!_ and was handed what seemed to be an old shirt.

‘Where is this from?’ asked Elio, using it to clean up as best he could none the less.

‘It’s an old shirt I keep in my draw in case I fancy a run at lunch time and don’t have my gym kit with me. Guess I won’t be using it for running anymore,’ said Oliver with a soft chuckle, as Elio finished cleaning up and pulled up his boxers and jeans, and righted his shirt. He still felt somewhat sticky, but in the absence of a shower, that was the best that he could do until they got back to Oliver’s apartment.

‘Better now?’ said Oliver with a grin as he finished sorting himself out.

‘I reckon my appetite has been sated for at least…’ said Elio glancing at his watch, ‘The twenty minutes it takes us to get back to your apartment. Then we’re going to fuck as many times as you can get it up, and my ass can take it.’

Oliver chuckled, ‘Best not hang about then if the clock is ticking.’

‘Quite,’ said Elio, watching as Oliver picked up his bag and jacket. He unlocked the heavy lock on the door and swung it open, letting Oliver switch the lights off in his office and shut the door behind them both. He heard Oliver turn the key in the lock and then saw him put it in his pocket.

‘What do you fancy for dinner tonight? If you can even think about food that is…’ asked Oliver as they walked along toward the elevator, ‘We can pick something up on the way back.’

‘I dunno…’ said Elio, ‘Although I did notice that a new Vietnamese place had opened up near yours. We could try there?’

‘Oh yeah,’ said Oliver, ‘One of my neighbours was raving about that the other day. Good call.’

Elio smiled as they headed into the lift and down to the entrance hall. He could get used to this, just chatting with Oliver about what to have for dinner, on the way back to a place where they would both sleep for the night. It just seemed such a natural thing to do. He just felt happy. He knew that he was away in his head and that he must have had a dopey look on his face because Oliver brought him back to earth with a poke.

‘Welcome back Elio,’ he teased, ‘Nice daydream?’

‘Shut up,’ said Elio, sliding the grille back on the door to step out into the entrance hall.

Oliver took his hand as they crossed the hall. They were completely alone, and by this point neither of them could actually care less. Elio mused briefly that it would actually make life a lot simpler if Naomi were simply to walk in right now and see them. Then again, that would make it hard on Oliver with the baby and everything… maybe that wasn’t such a good idea. Elio shook himself again as they stepped out into the biting New York December air.

They turned to walk around the edge of the quad, intermittent street lamps casting their light onto the pavement below, patches of darkness in between those puddles of light. It was still damp from the rain earlier. _Shit_ , thought Elio; he’d left his umbrella in Oliver’s office. Oh well, he’d have to go back and get it at some point. It wouldn’t come to any harm there.

They passed two guys leaning against the wall near the now-closed coffee shop. They looked like they were sharing a spliff of some sort, but Elio didn’t pay them too much attention, as he dodged to step over a half-eaten takeaway that someone had dumped on the floor.

‘Wish people wouldn’t do that,’ said Oliver with disgust in his voice, to which Elio just ‘mmpphed’ in return, looking at his feet to check he hadn’t accidentally stepped in any residual food.

The next second he was thrown sideways as Oliver fell into him, propelled by something that Elio couldn’t see. He yelled out in shock as he fell to his side, hitting the shadowed pavement between two buildings with a dull thud. A shooting pain went through his wrist where he’d thrown his hand out to save himself as he fell. He tried to catch his breath for half-a-second, as his brain caught up with _whatever the fuck_ jad just happened.

He heard a yell and scrambled up to his feet, his mouth dry with panic as he half turned to see someone shove him back against the wall; their forearm against his neck, trying to force the air from his body.

‘Stay _still_!’ the man said; his hood and hat concealing his face as Elio desperately wriggled to get free, ‘We don’t have any fight with you!’

This only panicked Elio more as the sounds of the fight came roaring back into his ears. There had to be at least four of them, and other than the one holding him to the wall; all of them were setting on Oliver; as mass of bodies behind the guy who was holding him. One of them was on his back, pulling his head back, whilst another had just punched him in the sternum, causing Oliver to yell out winded, his blond head catching the light of fickle streetlamp that was gloomily illuminating whatever was going on, but not enough for anyone to see properly. Elio kicked out desperately, managing to catch the guy who was holding him on the kneecap, causing him to let go for a milli-second, in which time Elio was able to punch him in the nose. There was a flash of awful pain across his knuckles after a horrible _crunch_ , but he barely thought about it as he threw himself at one of the men who was pulling on Oliver’s left arm to try and effectively stop him from fighting back.

‘Get the fuck off him!’ Elio yelled desperately, kicking out at the guy again, trying – and succeeding – to stamp on his foot. The guy yelled out in pain and surprise and turned towards his new attacker, fury and blood lust alight in his eyes as he raised his right hand to hit out at Elio. Elio dodged instinctively, throwing his body to the side under the arm that was raised, and almost managed to get out of the way, the knuckles only grazing across his cheekbone, but by then the one who he had punched in the nose earlier had gathered himself together again, and socked him several times in the stomach, the earlier statement of not having a fight with him clearly having been abandoned. He doubled over; his world reduced to a pinprick of pain that was at the top of his stomach. He couldn’t breathe, he wretched several times, desperately trying to draw breath into his heaving body. He was vaguely aware of the sounds of the fight next to him, but he was too busy fighting to breathe, to draw air into his tortured lungs, to really be able to focus. Before he could gather himself back together, somebody had kicked him in the groin and he fell to the floor in a whirl of pain; nothing hurt more than this. He didn’t know whether he was yelling or not. He curled in on himself, throwing up his hands to try and protect his head, and drawing up his knees to try and prevent the boots from kicking his stomach. He didn’t know how many times he was kicked.

He heard a roar of almost inhuman fury, and a strangled yelp as a body hit the wall opposite, but he barely had time to think about it as someone trod on his already injured hand, making him scream out in pain. Every inch of him seemed to hurt as he tried to draw himself into the tightest ball possible, anything to get away from the onslaught. His world faded into the boots that felt like they were turning his body into mulch when he saw a flash of metal and then heard the most horrible sound like air being let out of a tyre and the most awful wheezing noise, before another body hit the floor beside him. Then the beating seemed to slow for a second, and the sounds of the fight lessened, and he realised that one of the guys was trying to stop the others.

‘Hey, hey, hey, we’re only supposed to scare him, not fucking kill him!’ said one of the voices. Heavy breathing and a low keening sound were all Elio could hear on the edge of his consciousness. He thought his ear might be bleeding, though, so he wasn’t sure who was making the noise, or really which direction it was coming from.

‘We’ll he’s not dead, ain’t he?’ said another viciously.

‘Says the one holding the fucking knife!’

‘Shut the fuck up!’

Elio tried to roll onto his front, to slide away, but someone kicked him again, twice in the ribs, and once in the side of the head when they saw him moving. He coughed, trying to draw a breath, but even that hurt him, as his vision swam in and out of his pounding head, and then slid out of consciousness to the sound of shouting, the blowing of a whistle, and running feet.

And then silence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry? 
> 
> **
> 
> For serious though my lovely readers, this chapter was hard to write. I tried to get the juxtaposition between joy and pain just right and I hope I did it some justice. I've never really written a fight scene before, so I found it difficult to do. Any comments are gratefully received. Your comments and feedback keep me writing. I love writing this story, and I adore these characters. I hope you do too. I'll try update by Wednesday so as not to leave you hanging too long but I'm not promising too much. 
> 
> xx  
> I


	23. Blood In The Water

‘ _Two John Does found near the northern university quad…’_

_…_

_‘Male, roughly 25 years in age, contusions to the face and body, blunt trauma to the chest and neck, two knife wounds to the lower abdomen…’_

_…_

_‘Male, roughly 20 years of age, contusions to the face and body, blunt trauma to the abdomen and chest, possibly broken wrist and fingers. No knife wounds found…’_

_…_

Elio tried to his best to remain conscious as his vision and hearing rocked and roiled like the ocean during a storm, but constant consciousness seemed to be evading him, no matter how hard he tried to cling onto it. Every time he came to enough to hear or see a snippet of what was going on, which was mostly a blur, it faded away again, like he was trying to hold water in his bare hands.

There were lights flashing above him, and he was aware of moving at quite a speed, without the use of his legs, which he thought was strange. He tried to speak, or to open eyes, to see what was going on, but it seemed like his body was not obeying him at that moment in time. He felt like his brain was yelling, but his body just didn’t want to listen.

‘ _We’re heading to St Catherine’s. Our Sisters of Mercy is closer but they’re dealing with that twenty car pileup that just happened on one of the bridges…’_

…

The next thing Elio was really aware of is lying in a small room, on what was clearly a hospital gurney. He didn’t know how he had got there. He couldn’t remember anyone finding him, or bringing him here. The sides of the gurney had been pushed up and clicked into place, to stop him rolling off, if it were in his mind to do so. All he could think about was the pain currently throbbing through his body, and he tried to open his eyes, only to find that he could only open one. He wasn’t aware that he’d been hit in the face, but judging by the fact that his other eye appeared to be swollen, stopping him from opening it more than a slit, he guessed he must have been. He was half-sitting, with a flat pillow behind his head, and he was aware of lots of people bustling around him. Someone’s fingers were on his neck, which was sore, but he didn’t have the wherewithal to tell them to stop.

‘ _Pulse rate is 96 beats per minute_ ,’ said a voice, _‘Quite high, but stabilising.’_

‘Uhhh,’ he breathed out, trying to make one of the many people moving around him aware that he was awake. This was unnecessary because a second later someone touched his hand and he let out an involuntary yell, so now they definitely knew he was conscious.

‘Hello,’ said one of the doctors as she noticed he was looking at her, ‘You’re at St Catherine’s hospital; it looks like you were attacked, and we’re checking you over and taking care of you, okay? Can you tell me your name?’

‘Uh, Elio,’ he croaked. It hurt to use his mouth, and he thought he might have a split lip. He wondered if he would need stitches.

‘That’s great Elio,’ said the Dr., ‘I’m Dr. Wilson and I’ll be looking after you tonight.’

‘Where’s Oliver?’ he asks instantly, before she could be distracted again by one of the many people doing various things to him.

‘The man who you came in with?’ asked Dr. Wilson.

Elio nodded in response and whined as it hurt to do so.

‘He’s in trauma room two just next door,’ said Dr. Wilson, ‘His team are looking after him; don’t you worry about that.’

Elio didn’t like the patronising tone in her voice, but didn’t really have the strength to argue with her.

‘Is he alright?’ Elio wheezed, as someone unbuttoned his shirt and starts prodding his chest in various places. He felt them attach various wires and things to monitor him, and he hissed out his pain as someone prodded him somewhere that was especially sore.

‘They’re doing their best for him. Whatever he needs he’ll get here,’ said Dr Wilson, removing his boots and then his jeans, using a pair of medical scissors, and then turned to one of the nurses who was in the room as well, ‘Order a CT scan, and an x-ray on his wrist and hand. I want to see whether we’ve got any internal bleeding, but the fact that you’re talking to us, Elio, is a good sign.’

Elio tried to smile weakly. It didn’t feel like a good sign. Every inch of him hurt. So much so that he wasn’t even sure _where_ exactly the hurt was coming from; he couldn’t pin it down to one particular area.  

‘Do you have an emergency contact we can call, Elio?’ asked one of the nurses currently nearby.

‘Sharp pinch,’ said another, causing Elio to gasp as a cannula was pushed into his uninjured hand and then hooked up to something hanging on an IV with a dial, to deliver pain medication directly into his body.

‘Errr... my wallet has my details in it,’ said Elio, trying to turn his head to look for his jacket which had had his wallet in the pocket.

‘No wallet was found with you,’ said the nurse, ‘But don’t worry; I’m sure the police will find it at the scene.’

Elio nodded, too tired to care much about the meagre contents of his wallet. He hadn’t had much cash on him; the only thing he was concerned about was his medical card and ID.

‘Erm, if you call my flat, they have my parents number tacked on the kitchen board,’ Elio mumbled, ‘I’ll give you the number – OW!’

‘Sorry sweetie,’ said another doctor, ‘I’ve got to lay your hand on the plate in order to get a good picture when we go down to the CT, where we’ll do a localised x-ray at the same time.’

Elio tried to tell her he was okay with that, but he was more concentrating on the shooting pains in his fingers and wrist.

‘Alright, we’re going to give you some pain medication now, so things should start to feel less painful in a minute,’ said the nurse, attaching a tube to the needle in his hand. There was a moment of pressure, and then it lessened.

‘You’ve lost some blood from various contusions, but have no major apparent wounds,’ said Dr Wilson, checking over the different areas of his body. Elio coughed, and the pain shot through his chest at the movement. He didn’t look down at his body, knowing that what he would see would simply be a pretty pattern of purple bruising beginning to emerge. 

‘Can we also get a urologist in here as well for a consultation?’ said Dr Wilson making some notes on Elio’s chart, ‘It looks like he’s taken some damage to the groin area, and I want someone to check that everything is alright.’

If he could summon the energy Elio would be marginally embarrassed that they were looking at him, including areas that only he (and Oliver) saw on a regular basis. He tried to hold in the forefront of his mind that they were doctors, and were not thinking about this in an odd way _at all_.

‘Alright honey, we’re going to take you down for CT Scan and the localised x-ray,’ said Dr Wilson, ‘You don’t need a contrast because we’re specifically looking at the contusions on your body and checking there’s no internal bleeding, okay?’

‘Can I see Oliver?’ said Elio, ignoring this statement, ‘What’s going on?’

‘You can’t see him right now, he’s being treated by his own team,’ said Dr Wilson, ‘And we’re going to move. Nurse Matthews can you please bring the IV stand with the fluid and pain meds please?’

‘On it Dr Wilson,’ said a woman as they began to move as a cavalcade; out of the room and down the corridor.

Elio let his head fall to the side again as the pain meds washed over him. He felt like he was going to fall asleep again, but tried to stay awake as they headed down in an elevator.

He wanted to see Oliver, to know that he was alright. He let out a little hiccough of a sob that he was sure one of the nurses heard.

‘It’s alright, Elio,’ she said a moment later, confirming his suspicions, ‘You’re going to be okay,’

‘Can you please check on Oliver, let me know he’s alright?’ Elio said, pain shooting through his mouth as he moved his lips.

‘We’ll get you an update as soon as we can sweetie, okay?’ she said. He half nodded; this seemed to be the best he was going to get at the moment. He shut his eyes; if only to try and block out the bright lights overhead that were making his already painful head throb.

‘Okay, we’re just going to slide you over onto the CT now,’ said the nurse an indeterminate amount of time later, ‘And then you’re going to have to lie still for us for ten minutes or so whilst we get a good look, alright?’

Elio tried to nod, but that hurt his neck, so he just muttered an “mmphm” in her direction. The next moment he was lifted slightly as a board was slid underneath his back, and then transferred onto the CT machine.

‘You’re not claustrophobic are you, Elio?’ asked Dr Wilson, looking down at him.

‘No,’ he mumbled, ‘Not that I’m aware of.’

‘Okay good,’ she said, ‘Right, well we’re going to slid you on in now. If you want to get out just let us know; we’ll be able to hear you, but just try and wait it out so we can see what’s going on.’

‘Okay,’ Elio agreed, as the machine juddered to life and he was carried head first into what looked like a metal tube. The top of it was about 30 cm above his face, and he couldn’t help but feel constricted in the tube. Now he knew why they’d asked if he were claustrophobic. If this kind of thing made him panic, he’d be about ready to have a heart attack right now. He fought the urge to ask to get out immediately as the machine juddered loudly to life, making noises that he didn’t want to ask about. He shut the eye that he could actually open, and tried to relax, despite the noise of the machine. He took some deep breaths and began to try and count sheep in his head. He kept getting distracted, and then he lost count.

‘You’re doing really well Elio,’ came Dr Wilson’s voice through an intercom somewhere near his head, ‘You’re already four minutes in; just a little while longer.’

 Elio tried not to move, and to focus on anything else other than the whirring and banging of the machine. His mind wandered to Oliver and he tried to think of something else; he remembered the grunt and wheeze, the most horrible sound he’d ever heard him make. He’d overheard something about a _knife_ and at the time his addled brain hadn’t been able to make much sense of it. As he thought about it, he started to panic; had Oliver been stabbed? Was he going to die? He needed to see him! What if he woke up and he thought he was alone?

‘Elio?’ came Dr Wilson’s voice, ‘Are you alright? Your heartrate is going up, can you try and stay calm for me?’

‘What’s happening with Oliver?’ Elio asked, opening the only eye that he could, and being reminded that he was stuck in a silver tube, unable to move because it hurt too much, despite the meds.

‘We’ll have an update when you’ve finished in here,’ said Dr Wilson, ‘You’ve only got a couple more minutes to go; take a deep breath for me.’

Elio fought the rising feeling of panic in chest, trying to take a deep gasping breath, even though that hurt his ribs. He tried to calm down, trying to rationalise that he couldn’t actually do anything about it right now, no matter how panicked he got. The side of his brain that was flooding with worry about Oliver wasn’t really paying to the logic of the situation, it was just imagining everything terrible it possibly could, right up to and including Oliver dying, which just made tears spring to Elio’s eyes and fall without him being able to stop them. He couldn’t have wiped them away even if he wanted to; for a start his wrist hurt too much to move, and secondly the metal tube was too thin for him to move his hands up the side of his body.

A few moments later, or it could have been an eternity, the loud clanking and whirring of the machine stopped and he felt himself judder out again. The nurses repeated the loading process, but only backwards, and within a few minutes he was back on the gurney, on his way back to the ward. The pain medication had fully kicked in now, and he couldn’t really feel a huge amount. It felt like he was lying on some sort of fluffy cloud that was sucking him in, making his bones feel heavy, and his body too lethargic to move. It felt quite nice; it was certainly a relief from the pain. He was wheeled to a halt in a room.

‘Elio!’

A voice calling his name broke him out of his blissed relaxation, and he opened his eye to see Alana standing over him, with Whitney, and Teddy there as well.

‘Jesus Christ man,’ said Teddy, ‘You look like you were in a fight with a mountain lion and lost.’

Elio grinned with the side of his mouth could move through the swelling, ‘Yeah well, you should see the other guy.’

Alana tittered with nervous laughter, ‘We came straight over as soon as we got the call from the nurse about half an hour ago.’

 _Half an hour?_ Elio thought. It felt like an eternity and seconds all at the same time.

‘Zoe’s working,’ explained Teddy, ‘But I’ll let her know what’s happened when she comes back.’

‘What did happen?’ asked Whitney, her voice coming out as little more than a squeak.

Elio didn’t think he could really explain that too well; he wasn’t sure his brain could separate the events of the evening into a meaningful sequence, the only thing he was sure of was, ‘We were jumped; like Hannah.’

‘We?’ asked Alana.

‘Was with Oliver,’ Elio mumbled, and then a strangled sob came out again, ‘He was hurt worse than I was; I think he’s been stabbed.’

Alana gasped, her face went pale, and her hands went to her mouth, ‘Oh Jesus.’

Just then a nurse came into the room, her hands holding a clipboard which she was looking at.

‘Elio, is it?’ she said, to which Elio nodded.

‘Hi, I’m nurse Walker, you’re in one of my rooms for the night. You’re on the acute injuries ward,’ she said.

‘And Oliver, what about Oliver?’ Elio asked desperately.

‘Yes,’ she said, ‘I have an update for you, he’s down in surgery at the moment sweetie…’

Elio let out a gasp and began to cry again, without even bothering to try and hide it, ‘Why, what does he need surgery for?’

‘The knife wounds which he sustained have caused some internal damage which requires repairing,’ said the nurse gently.

‘He’s going to be okay though?’ asked Alana, ‘He’ll be alright?’

‘His team are doing everything they can,’ said the nurse, refusing to be drawn in one direction or the other, in case her words later came back to haunt her. Elio felt sick; he didn’t want to think about it.

‘Nurse?’

A doctor strode into the room, looking for Nurse Walker.

‘Yes doctor?’ she asked, moving away from him and approaching the doctor, but Elio could still hear what they were saying.

‘Can you get on the phone to the George Infirmary and the St Peters?’ he asked, ‘The blood shortage we’re having is really hitting us hard tonight, what with the car pile-up that’s reserved everything at St Catherine’s, and there’s been a shooting out in Brooklyn, so everything is going to be needed. We’re running especially low on AB- of which there are two patients in surgery who may need it.’

‘Yes doctor’ said the nurse, taking this all in, and making a few notes on her clipboard.

Elio’s mind was spinning; was that Oliver? He’d never asked Oliver what his blood type was; why would he have done? That wasn’t something they discussed. With another few tears, Elio realised that there were so many things that he and Oliver had never discussed. He tried to push the thought to the back of his mind. They would be able to discuss everything afterwards, because they were both going to come through this. They would have a lifetime to learn everything there was to know about each other.

‘I can give blood,’ said Whitney stepping forward towards the doctor and nurse, ‘I know it’s not much, but I’ll give.’

‘Same,’ said Teddy instantly.

‘Same, and I’m AB-,’ said Alana, ‘I know it won’t do for the patients downstairs by the time it’s been tested. But I’ll do what I can.’

‘Really?’ asked the doctor looking across at them, ‘That’s fantastic, anything we can have at the moment, when we’re running so low, is incredible. Thank you so much.’

Whitney shrugged it off, ‘If we head to haematology will there be a donation nurse to process us?’

‘Yes,’ said the doctor, ‘If you go towards the NICU, it’s on the right before you get there.’

Whitney nodded and then turned back to Elio, ‘We’ll be back in a moment.’

Elio’s tears had stopped flowing, but he was frightened, and it probably showed on his face. He hated not knowing what was going on. He hissed in pain as Whitney tried to give him a little bit of a hug.

‘Nurse, can he not have any more pain meds?’ asked Teddy, noticing Elio’s flinch of pain.

The nurse came back over from the door where she was speaking to the doctor again, and after consulting Elio’s chart, she nodded, and turned the nozzle on Elio’s pain drip, allowing another dose into his body.

‘It’ll just take a moment, but you should feel better in a moment,’ she said kindly. Elio smiled weakly in her direction, waiting for the re-emergence of his pain to disappear.

‘Alright,’ said Alana, smiling at him, ‘We’ll be back as soon as we can.’

Elio smiled, feeling the pain medication washing over his body, once again pressing him into that cloud like state from a little while earlier. He felt like he was floating away as he disjointedly watched Alana, Whitney and Teddy leave to go and give blood. He felt a sweet rush of gratitude at the three of them; they didn’t have to do that – they were doing it for people they didn’t know, just because they wanted to do what they could. They weren’t even sure it was Oliver who needed the blood, and their blood wouldn’t be processed fast enough anyway. They were just doing it help. Elio smiled sleepily, and let the relaxation of the medication swim over him, allowing his eyes to close. He wasn’t sure if he slept, but he was sure that his mind momentarily vacated the present, and drifted off to somewhere much more comfortable and peaceful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for putting you (and Elio and Oliver) through this guys! It will all be worth it in the end - I promise! I wrote this quite quickly, so if you spot any mistakes, please let me know! Also, my knowledge of hospitals comes solely from watching episodes of Grey's Anatomy... so any mistakes are definitely, definitely mine! 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who commented on the last chapter - it really means the world to me and makes me smile from ear to ear when I see you guys have commented.


	24. The Storm Clouds Burst

Elio’s dreams were troubled. He was surrounded by shapes pushing at him, and then he was being prodded and rolled, like a boat on a sea that was being stirred up by a wind. Faces swam in front of his vision as he fought his way out of the waves, and tried to cough the water out of his lungs. He felt like he was drowning from the inside out, and he could feel the panic inside of his head. He wanted to wake up and be free of the clinging fingers of the water all around him.

Then a face was approaching him from above the water, grasping his hand as he fought to break the surface so that he could breathe again. The friendly face, of someone he loved, was pulling him up, saving him from drowning in his dreams, tugging him back to the surface of consciousness and out of the cloying suffocation of sleep.

‘Elio..?’ the voice said gently, and his eyes opened, even though his vision was slightly blurry with the remnants of sleep. He could open his swollen eye slightly more than he could the last time he was awake. The face of his saviour slowly came into focus.

‘ _Mamma?’_ he said, looking up at her, her face breaking out into a soft smile. Elio took a breath and then he promptly burst into tears, unable to help himself, his mother wrapped her arms around him, gently to avoid hurting him, and held him as he cried. He breathed in her comforting scent of _home_.  

‘W-when did you get here?’ Elio asked, his tears stopping as quickly as they had started as he got over the shock of seeing her.

‘We’ve only been here a little while,’ she said, ‘We got the first flight we could as soon as the doctor called us. Apparently, you’ve been asleep for the best part of sixteen hours.’

‘ _Mi dio,’_ mumbled Elio, ‘ _Papa è qui?’_

‘ _Si_ ,’ said his mum, ‘He’s just in the corridor, speaking to the doctor. I’ll go let him know that you’re awake.’

She loosed his hand for a moment, leaving a scent of jasmine perfume behind her as she went to the door and poked her heard out.

‘ _Sammie, tuo figlio è sveglio,_ ’ she said out of the door.

The next moment his father was in the room as well, and moved towards him, kissing him softly on the forehead, his face white and tired looking.

‘ _Buonasera, Elio_ ,’ he said gently, ‘ _Ci hai dato uno spavento_.’

Elio half smiled with the side of his mouth that he could move, ‘I didn’t mean to scare you guys.’

‘It’s not your fault baby,’ said his mum, switching back to English as the doctor walked into the room.

‘Hello Elio,’ said Dr Wilson, ‘Nice to see you awake. How do you feel?’

Elio smiled wanly, ‘Like I was hit by a truck,’

Dr Wilson nodded, ‘Yes, you’ll be staying with us for a few days for certain whilst we make sure you’re definitely on the mend. We patched you up a bit whilst you were asleep, with the aid of a few deeper painkillers to keep you under.’

Elio nodded, ‘Stitches in my lip – I can feel those.’

‘Yes,’ said Dr Wilson, ‘Those will have to come out in about five days. You’ve also got a greenstick fracture in the ulna bone, as well as crush damage to the pisiform and triquetral areas of your hand, along with the fourth and fifth metacarpal. So, your hand and arm is going to be in plaster for about six weeks, but the orthopaedic consultant is confident that you will have full use of your hand and fingers when everything heals up.’

Elio let out a sigh of relief, looking down at his injured hand that was lying on his hip; he’d acquired a bright blue cast in the time that he’d been unconscious. He hadn’t even thought about it when he’d been in the trauma room, but he was extremely glad that everything would be alright.

‘You also broke your fifth rib on the left side, and have severe bruising around your eye – as I’m sure you can tell – stomach, pelvis, and mouth,’ said Dr Wilson, ‘We’ll be keeping you here until you have the stitches out of your lip in five days time, to keep an eye on you and make sure everything is healing the way it should be.’

Elio nodded trying to absorb all of this information, in the grand scheme of things it seemed he would be alright. He had just been thoroughly battered; which wasn’t all that far from the truth.

‘And Oliver?’ he asked quietly, ‘How is Oliver?’

Time slowed as Dr Wilson glanced sideways at his parents. Elio gritted his teeth, wondering why she was looking at them; was she asking for their support? What was she going to tell him that she needed to communicate with his parents non-verbally first?

‘He’s stable, but currently unconscious,’ said Dr Wilson, ‘His surgery to control the internal haemorrhage went well, and he was very lucky that no major organs were damaged by the knife’s internal trajectory. The surgeon in charge of his case decided it was better to keep him medically sedated to give his body a chance to recover from the surgery and from the trauma. We’re monitoring him for late-onset shock or any further injures.’

Elio could have cried again with relief, ‘Is he going to be okay then?’

Dr Wilson gave a very small smile, ‘He’s been through the ringer that’s for sure. He’s broken a few fingers - but we think that’s from punching people rather than stress fractures -, he has lacerations on his neck, as well as severe bruising around the face, neck, chest and stomach. But, having said all that, we are fairly confident that without any adverse happenings, he should make a full recovery.’

Elio let out the breath he didn’t realise he’d been holding, and looked up his mum, who smiled back and squeezed his uninjured hand.

Dr Wilson’s pager beeped, ‘Alright, I’ve got to go, but if you need me just press the bell for the nurse and have her page me; okay? I’m on shift for the next four hours, and then Dr Edward will be taking over your care.’

‘Alright, thank you doctor,’ said his father as the Dr left the room to answer whatever the page had been about.

Both his parents turned back towards him, his mother smoothing his hair back from his forehead, even though it wasn’t in his face. She was carefully to avoid his bruised eye and side of his head.

‘I want to see him,’ Elio murmured, but didn’t really have the strength to try and move, ‘What time is it?’

‘It’s coming up to four in the afternoon,’ said his dad, ‘I have to leave in a moment to go and check into our hotel; but I will come right back.’

‘How long can you stay with me?’ Elio asked.

‘I think visiting hours are until nine,’ said his mum, ‘So we’ll stay as long as we can. I think your friends are coming back in a bit. Two girls… Rory, and Elaine…? I think? Were still here when we got here, asleep in the chair over there. Rory said that she didn’t want you to wake up on your own.’

Elio smiled, ‘Sounds like Rory. And by the way _mamma_ , the other girl is Alana.’

‘Ah,’ said his mum, ‘Sorry, I couldn’t quite remember.’

Elio smiled sleepily, trying to hide a yawn, and then said, ‘I’m not actually that tired, I guess it’s just the medication making me yawn. I am kind of hungry though.’

‘I’ll see if I can find you something to eat,’ said his mum, ‘It’ll have to be something soft though, I imagine, because of your lip.’

‘And I’ll go and find our hotel,’ said his dad, leaning down to kiss him on the forehead again, ‘I’ll be back as soon as I can Elly.’

Elio nodded, ‘See you in a bit _papa_.’

With that his dad left the room, hitching a rucksack Elio hadn’t noticed before, off a chair and onto his back. He looked up at his mum, noticing the tired marks under her eyes and the lack of make up on her face. It was clear that as soon as they’d got the phone call they’d rushed across oceans and continents to be here as quickly as they could.

‘ _Je suis si content que tu sois l_ _à,’_ he said to her.

‘I wouldn’t be anywhere else baby,’ she said to him, squeezing his uninjured hand, ‘Alright, I’m just going to go and find some food for you, okay? I’ll be right back.’

Elio nodded and smiled, ‘ _Si, mamma_.’

**

Elio glanced at his bedside clock, which Rory had thoughtfully brought for him from his room. It told him that it was creeping towards one in the morning. His parents had left, only at the insistence of the doctors at about nine that evening. All of his flatmates, as well as Rory, had also come to visit him. He had been very tired after they’d all left and he’d slept deeply for a good three hours or so. But now he was awake, and he was itching to see Oliver.

He knew the doctor had said that they were keeping him medically sedated, but he wanted to see him anyway. Also, that had been nearly twelve hours ago when the doctor had told him that, anything could have happened in the meantime. He glanced at the clock once again, and watched the second hand do a full rotation before he decided to try and do anything. He sat up very cautiously, trying to ignore the pain in his ribs as he did so, and moved his legs over the edge of his bed so that he could put his feet on the floor. He was still attached to the IV that was giving him pain medication, but thankfully his heart rate and oxygen levels were no longer being read, so he didn’t have any wires other than the one in the back of his hand.

He gripped hold of the IV stand, which was on wheels, and slowly moved towards the door of his room. Doing everything one handed was vastly annoying, as he had discovered earlier when he had gotten up to go for a pee. The door was open a crack, and he could see the dimmed lights of the hospital corridor just outside. The problem was that he had no clue which room Oliver was in. In the back of his mind he reasoned that it couldn’t be too far from him; surely they were being treated in the same wing? Or by teams who knew what the other was doing?

He slowly opened his door, and peered out. There was no one in the corridor. He crept out slowly, trying to be as quiet as possible, and turned to the left. The first room he peered into appeared to be a public ward, and he figured that Oliver wouldn’t be on a public ward – that he would be somewhere private like him. He stood stock still as two nurses bustled along a corridor that ran along the end of the one that he was currently walking down; but they didn’t spot him as they were intent on their destinations.

Then he spotted Oliver’s name on a tiny card stuck by a door. He figured his door must have one too. It was very odd, and disconcerting, to see the words ‘ **O. Davis – post-op patient’** printed on a little card. He peered in, but the room was dark compared to the light of the corridor he was standing in, so he couldn’t see anything. Elio let out a breath he didn’t realise he was holding, and opened the door, sliding inside as quickly as he could whilst trailing his IV stand. He shut the door behind him and turned towards the bed.

Oliver was lying on his back, Elio judged by the shape of the lump in the bed, and for all he could see was fast asleep. Elio took a step and let out a little moan of pain through his battered lips. Oliver’s face was a mess; one of his eyes was swollen, but he had more bruising around his nose and mouth than Elio, and it looked like he had some stitches on his cheek. Elio took the necessary steps to stand next to his bed, and looked down at the man he loved. There was severe bruising around Oliver’s neck, and Elio could see lacerations where the necklaces Oliver wore had bitten and torn into his skin, and the purple bruising spread out down his shoulder and chest. The sheet was pulled up to his armpits, and he was also wearing the standard issue hospital pyjamas, so Elio couldn’t see any evidence of the surgery or further injuries. He was hooked up to an IV just like Elio, but also to a heart rate monitor, and a few other machines. Elio stood a for a moment, listening to the steady _beep… beep… beep_ of the heart rate monitor as it noted the strong cadence of Oliver’s heart.

Elio looked around for a chair, spotting one on the other side of the bedside table. There was a vase of flowers on Oliver’s bedside table that were giving off a sweet-scented perfume that reminded him of one that his aunt used to wear. He just about managed to move the chair to be beside Oliver’s bed, without crying out in pain, for all that his ribs and chest were screaming at him to do so. He sat down heavily, out of breath, and took Oliver’s hand in his uninjured one. He could see that Oliver’s knuckles were bruised and scraped up, although they didn’t appear to be broken.

‘Hey Oliver,’ he breathed, to the still man in front of him, ‘We’re a bit messed up right now aren’t we?’

He didn’t really know why he was bothering to speak to him; he knew he must sound a bit silly. He didn’t know whether Oliver could hear him, but he if he’d been a betting man, he’d have guessed not.

‘I love you,’ said Elio, ‘You know that? I’ve just been so worried about you, and I wanted to come see you… I couldn’t sleep without knowing you were… well I don’t know. _Okay_ isn’t the right word.’

Elio’s thumb was stroking over the skin between Oliver’s forefinger and thumb, feeling the softness of the skin there. He lifted the hand he was holding and kissed each knuckle, around the bruising that was there. Looking down at his face in the semi darkness, Elio couldn’t help but start to cry. Had this happened because of him? Or had they just been in the wrong place at the wrong time? A tear ran down his face, towards his chin, before dripping off the end, and splashing down onto Oliver’s hand.

Oliver shifted in his sleep, and made a noise halfway between a snuffle and a sigh. His face turned very slightly towards where Elio was sitting.

‘Oliver?’ Elio breathed quietly, not daring to hope that he could hear him. Oliver didn’t answer, as Elio scanned his face looking for signs of recognition or awareness. Elio leaned down and kissed a tiny section of Oliver’s face that was not bruised or battered.

‘I love you,’ he said again, hoping for another sign of life from him.

As he sat back up, Oliver moved again. This time the sigh that came out of his mouth carried some shape of a sound, ‘Elio…’

Elio thought he saw Oliver’s uninjured eye open just the tiniest amount, but he couldn’t be sure. Then Oliver seemed to drift back into a deeper sleep or state of unconsciousness, and his body totally relaxed once more. Elio let a small smile pass across the side of his mouth he could use. Even if Oliver hadn’t actually said his name, or been in any form of consciousness, it had sounded like he had. Elio knew he could sleep now, knowing that Oliver was at least alive, and was just down the corridor from him.

Resisting the urge to simply lay down his head on the side of Oliver’s bed, because his ribs were hurting, his arm was throbbing, and the thought of walking back to his room was filling him with dread, he got slowly back to his feet.

**

The next morning he woke up to a nurse doing all of the regular checks, and winced when she manhandled him onto his side to check his ribs and pelvis. She didn’t seem to notice, or perhaps she didn’t care, because she was too busy to worry about a little bit of discomfort. He had definitely slept better after he’d snuck back to his room last night – seeing Oliver had assuaged a lot of his worries, no matter how daft they had been in the first place. He knew that he had probably dreamed Oliver murmured ‘Elio’ under his breath, but somehow it didn’t really matter. He was just glad to see him (mostly) whole, and in the care of good people.

He was eating breakfast, slowly and one-handed, when his mother came into the room, carrying a bundle of clothes and a bouquet of flowers.

‘ _Buongiorno mi cara_ ,’ she said when she saw he was awake.

‘ _Buongiorno_ ,’ he replied. She looked less tired than she had yesterday, and seemed relatively chirpy as she located a large empty glass to the put the flowers in which she had brought.

‘I brought you some of your own pyjamas,’ she said, turning back to him, ‘I thought they would be more comfortable than the hospital ones.’

‘Well that’s definitely true,’ said Elio, reaching for his cup of tea on the side.

‘Here you go,’ said his mother, reaching for it and handing it to him, ‘It’s easier if I do it.’

‘ _Grazie_ ,’ he said with a smile, ‘Although I will have to get used to doing stuff myself, I’ve got this for six weeks!’

‘ _Si_ ’ she said, ‘But no need to push yourself too hard just yet.’

‘Okay _mamma_ ,’ he said and took a sip of tea, ‘ _Dov’è papa?’_

‘He’s just coming,’ she said, ‘He went to your flat to pick up a couple of your books and also your cassette player.’

‘Oh that’s cool of you to think about that,’ said Elio, and then winced as his wide grin pulled on his lip.

‘Careful _mi cara_ ,’ she said, noticing his wince.

‘I know,’ he said, ‘It’s strange to get used to.’

They looked up as there was a knock on the door, and Dr Wilson poked her head around it.

‘Morning Elio,’ she said, ‘Mrs Perlman.’

‘Morning Doctor,’ said Annella, ‘Is everything alright?’

‘Everything’s fine,’ said Dr Wilson, ‘But there are two policeman waiting outside who wish to take a statement from Elio; if you feel up to doing so?’

His mum turned to look at him, and Elio half shrugged in response, he felt okay – there was no reason why he shouldn’t talk to the police.

‘It’ll be alright,’ said Elio to Dr Wilson.

‘Okay,’ she said, ‘I’ve only given them half an hour though, because then you’ve got your checks with the orthopaedic surgeon who set your wrist.’

Elio nodded and half-smiled. It amused him to think that Dr Wilson had the authority to boss police officers around here; this was her territory, and they would have to do as she said, unless there was an incident of patient safety or national security.

Dr Wilson disappeared, and a few moments later two policemen walked into the room.

‘Good Morning Mr Perlman,’ said one of the officers, approaching the bed, ‘I’m Officer Rees, and this is Sergeant Fox, who is leading your case.’

‘Hello,’ said Elio, ‘Please, call me Elio… Mr Perlman just sounds… odd.’

The officer called Rees smiled slightly.

‘Alright Elio,’ he said, ‘We’re just going to ask you a few questions about what you can remember from the other night, is that alright?’

Elio nodded, a little apprehensively.

‘Could you just go through the events, as you remember them?’

‘Erm, well, Professor Davis and I were leaving his office; it must have been about nine at night,’ said Elio, ‘We were just walking around the edge of the quad, and then we were attacked. There’s not really much more too it, other than that they seemed to be after Oliver rather than me. One of them even said that they didn’t have a fight with me and that I shouldn’t fight back.’

‘What did they look like?’ said Officer Rees

‘I don’t know really,’ said Elio, ‘They were wearing hoods and high clothes; so I couldn’t really see their faces.’

Officer Rees nodded, ‘Do you remember anything else?’

‘Not really,’ said Elio, ‘Sorry. It’s just a bit of a blur after I was grabbed. It all happened so quickly.’

‘Well, we have had more information come forward just yesterday,’ said Sergeant Fox.

‘Oh?’ asked Annella, leaning in, ‘What happened?’

‘One of the young men who was part of the group who attacked you came forward,’ said the Sergeant; ‘After our appeal for information, he came forward to confess. He’s currently in police custody. He told us that he never knew it was going to go that far. That it wasn’t supposed to go that far.’

Elio felt a surge of anger wash through him, ‘Well it did; and Oliver nearly fucking died because of it!’

‘Elio!’ said Annella, ‘It’s not the officer’s fault!’

Elio looked at them, slightly mollified, ‘I know, I know… I’m sorry.’

‘It’s alright,’ said Officer Rees, ‘Apparently they were just supposed to be scaring Professor Davis. To make him stop fighting against the events that have been going on recently.’

‘The fascist society?’ asked Elio, his mouth as wide as his stitches would allow.

‘Well they’re just part of it,’ said Sergeant Fox, ‘They’re part of a bigger organisation outside of the University…’

‘New World Order?’ asked Elio, remembering the posters he’d seen the very first night he’d gone out with Oliver.

‘Yes,’ said Rees, ‘What do you know about them?’

‘Not a lot,’ said Elio, ‘I just remember seeing propaganda from them since I’ve been here. And we’ve been in fights with the society who you’re saying is an offshoot…’

Officer Rees nodded, taking a few notes, ‘Alright, well I think that’s everything for now Elio. We might have to come back to ask some more questions when we know a bit more.’

‘I’m sorry I couldn’t be more help,’ said Elio.

‘It’s alright Elio,’ said Sergeant Fox, ‘It was just if you remembered anything distinctive about your attackers.’

‘Not especially,’ said Elio, ‘Sorry.’

Officer Rees smiled, ‘Alright, we’ll be back if we need anything more.’

Annella got up to see the two officers out of the room. She spoke to them for a moment or two before they both left the room, and she turned back. Elio pushed his head back into his pillow. Somehow, even though he’d only been speaking to the officers for five minutes, he was sleepy.

Annella was only step inside the room when there was another knock at the door. Before she turned to answer it, it opened.

‘Um, hello?’

‘Hello?’ asked Annella. Elio sat up and craned his neck to see who she was talking to. Standing just inside the doorway was an attractive brunette woman; her hair tied up in an ergonomic bun to keep it off her face.

‘Is this the room of the boy who was attacked?’ asked the woman.

‘Yes,’ he said, ‘Who’s asking?’

‘Can I talk to you?’ she asked, stepping further into the room. Elio’s mouth fell open as he saw that she was about seven months pregnant; her belly round and high.

‘Um, yes, I guess so,’ said Elio as she approached him. His mum came up and drew up the chair that was by the side for her to sit in.

‘I’m alright, actually,’ said the woman. She didn’t seem to be angry, or sad, or feeling anything at all in particular. It was clear she just wanted to stay standing because it made her feel a bit more confident. Elio tried to sit up properly, so that he was at less of a disadvantage.

‘I guess you know who I am I?’ she said, and held up her hand, where she was holding something in her clenched fist. Elio looked at it; and saw that she holding two gold necklaces on long chain, each with a small gold star on it.

‘Naomi,’ said Elio, ‘You’re Oliver’s wife.’

‘Hello,’ she said, and held out the hand that wasn’t holding the necklaces for him to shake. He did so, with his uninjured hand.

‘Are you alright to talk?’ asked Naomi, ‘I don’t want to take too much out of you. I know you’ve been through it; just like my husband.’

Elio nodded, ‘I’m alright. We can talk.’

Naomi nodded, a very small smile passing over her lips. It was then she took the seat that his mum had pulled up, sitting down beside him, settling her uncomfortable bulk in the most comfortable way that she could.

‘Um, I’ll leave you two talk. I’ll go and get us something to drink. Would you like anything… Naomi?’ said Annella. Elio felt panicked for a moment, but then realised that this was inevitable; this moment was going to have to come at some point.

‘I’ll have a decaffeinated tea,’ said Naomi, ‘Thank you…?’

‘Annella,’ said Elio’s mum, supplying her name. She glanced at Elio, just to check that he would be alright on his own. He nodded, and she left, before he turned back to Naomi, wondering what she knew, what she didn’t, and what she wanted from him right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everybody who commented on the last chapter. It means the absolute world to me - I'm sorry it was so stressful! I hope this one is a (little) better! <3 xxxx
> 
> Also chapter number has increased, because it's taking me longer to get through my plan than I thought it would!
> 
> Did anyone see Armie/Timmy's instagram stories today? They were super blurry and perhaps I was just imagining things, but it definitely looked like they were in the same place? Were they in each others stories? It kinda looked like it, but they were so fuzzy I couldn't tell!


	25. Three Lost At Sea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this chapter was really hard to write. Like, really really hard. I had an idea in mind for how it should go and I hope that I managed to get that across alright. I'd be very interested to hear what you guys think because I found this one really difficult to put on (electronic) paper. 
> 
> On a totally different note - has anyone ever had it before where a favourite author on here has just disappeared and taken their story with them? I went to check one of my subscriptions yesterday and it's just... gone... after 31 chapters it's vanished. I feel like I've lost a limb. It was so good, and the fact that it's gone is really heartbreaking. So, if by some ridiculously small chance that the author of 'The Scene' (QuesNDys?) is reading this - please please please come back and put your story back up. <3 <3 <3 <3 I'm sure I speak for the other zillion people who were subscribed as well... I'm devastated. It was so good!! 
> 
> Aside from that - I hope you guys like this chapter, and that I kept the characters true to themselves. Your feedback and thoughts are all gratefully appreciated. 
> 
> Love, 
> 
> V  
> xxx

Naomi waited until the door to the room had clicked into the frame before turning back towards Elio. He saw that she had soft brown eyes that had a little bit of brown eyeliner just under the waterline. There were dark smudges under her eyes; which suggested that she had spent several sleepless nights recently. She was also wearing some mascara and blush. She was pretty, in a gentle and conventional kind of way.

‘So, you’re Elio, right?’ she said after a moment of looking at him carefully. She had him at a definite disadvantage if she so chose. Yet Elio didn’t feel as if there was any anger hidden behind her face, more resignation and curiosity.

‘Yes, that’s right,’ said Elio, wondering how much Oliver had told her about him.

‘Uh-huh,’ she said, ‘Not what I was expecting at all…’

Elio was slightly taken aback by that statement, and was unsure as to whether he should be offended or not. He decided that she didn’t mean it to be offensive as she tilted her head to the side and her eyes slid from the top of his head and on down.

‘Not what you were expecting?’ he asked cautiously.  

Naomi shook her head slightly, ‘Sorry, I know that’s a bit of an odd thing to say, but you know how it is – when someone talks about someone a lot, you sort of make up this picture of them in your mind, as to what they look like, whether it’s true or not.’

‘Uh, Oliver talks about me?’ Elio ventured.

‘Well, he did,’ said Naomi, ‘Last year; a lot. After he got back from Italy it was almost like a compulsion; he couldn’t help himself. “Elio this…” and “Elio liked…” and “Elio would say…”; he realised he was doing it after a while and I think he made a conscious effort to stop, realising that people had picked up on it. But yeah, he definitely talked about you.’

Elio tried to control his features. He had felt a surge of delight deep in his chest that Oliver had been unable to stop talking about him after his return home last summer. He certainly hadn’t been able to stop talking or thinking about Oliver, so he was glad to know that it had been mutual.

‘But he hadn’t talked about you recently,’ said Naomi, and her eyebrow rose a little, ‘So I was somewhat surprised when I turn up here yesterday – after I find out that my husband has been attacked in what could have been a deadly knife attack – and discover that he was in the company of a young man from Italy named Elio, who was also attacked. Now, it could have been a coincidence, but I figured it probably wasn’t.’

Elio stayed silent. He didn’t exactly know what she wanted him to say; did she want him to confirm her train of thought, or to deny everything she was saying?

Naomi had paused in order to gauge his reaction, but when she realised that he wasn’t going to speak, she continued, ‘I remember him saying that the family he went to stay with last summer were Jewish. So, first things first… I imagine that this is yours?’

She still had both of the necklaces with the star-of-David in her hand, and she held one of them up for him to see. He didn’t know whether the one she was holding out was actually his or Oliver’s; he’d need to see them closer in order to determine. Oliver’s was slightly smaller than his was. He figured that the exactness wasn’t what Naomi was asking, however. Elio swallowed a little, and then nodded.

‘Yes, it is,’ he said, holding out his hand for her to give it to him. She didn’t make a move to do so right at that moment.

‘Why was Oliver wearing it?’ she asked, looking down at the necklaces pooled in her palm.

Now that it had come to it, Elio desperately wished he wasn’t alone. What did she want him to say? What should he say? He imagined that they were quite different things. What did Oliver want him to say? He knew that Oliver was going to tell Naomi about them, but he certainly hadn’t envisaged it happening like this. He needed Oliver’s advice. He needed his parents’ advice. Should he lie in answer to her question?

‘He was looking after it for me,’ said Elio. That was truth, if not the whys and wherefores as to _why_ he was looking after it.

Naomi looked at him carefully, ‘You’re a student here, yes?’

‘Yes,’ said Elio, wondering at the change of topic.

‘Classics?’ asked Naomi.

Elio shook his head, ‘No; my friend does Classics and I met Oliver through them.’

 _Still the truth_.

Naomi was silent again. Elio felt like he was screaming inside his body, but was desperately trying not to open his mouth. What did she know?

‘I guess that you must still be close?’ said Naomi, ‘I mean, you clearly became close last summer?’

 _If only she knew. Perhaps she did._ Elio nodded, ‘Yes, we’re good friends.’

‘He’s good like that,’ said Naomi, a small smile warming her features, ‘We were best friends. We’d grown up together. Same faith, same community. Same schools. Different colleges mind. But definitely best friends… And then we got married. And nothing has been the same since.’

Elio waited with his breath held before wetting his dry lips.

‘And?’ he asked croakily. He knew that she was perusing him with great interest, and that she must be able to read more on his face that he was putting across in his words. He’d always been rubbish at keeping a blank face. The one time Oliver had tried to teach him poker he’d failed miserably at hiding whether he had a good or bad hand.

‘We shouldn’t have,’ said Naomi softly, looking down at her stomach where she had folded her hands on top of the roundness. Elio bit his lip. She didn’t know him, and yet here she was; something had brought her into this room.

Naomi shuddered a deep breath before looking at him, and he was horrified to see that her eyes were wet. She wasn’t openly crying, but he could tell that she was holding back the tears from falling.

‘I’m sorry,’ she said, ‘I shouldn’t be putting this on you. It’s just… well… you know Oliver, and I feel like I haven’t got anyone to talk to other than him. And I feel like I can’t tell him… I think he knows, but I still can’t tell him…’

‘Tell him what?’ asked Elio nervously, wondering whether he should reach over and squeeze her shoulder or something. He felt utterly awkward, lying here, not knowing what to say or how to act. In the few moments he had to examine how he felt he realised that there was no guilt in how he was feeling, he was unsure if he should find that odd or not. Surely he should be feeling some modicum of guilt?

‘Tell him what I think… _about us_ ,’ she said, ‘We used to tell each other everything. After school I used to call him up and we’d speak for hours on the phone, even though we’d just been at school together. We’d talk about absolute nothing at all, but somehow it would go for hours. Yet now I feel as if I can’t speak to him. That there’s something else on his mind, or something that is holding me back. He seems nervous. I just wish we could go back to being the friends that we once were.’

Elio swallowed nervously.

‘Does he talk to you?’ Naomi asked.

‘Errr,’ said Elio, wondering how best to answer.

‘Oh come on,’ she said abruptly, showing the first flash of temper since she had come into the room which made Elio jump, ‘Someone doesn’t just agree to where someone else’s necklace because they fancy it! I know that there’s something going on between the two of you; I just can’t decide to what extent or what it is.’

There. She’d said it. She suspected something, knew nothing, and wanted to hear everything. But was Elio the right person to tell her?

‘Yes, he talks to me,’ said Elio, his heart hammering ‘We’re close, we’re good friends. He took the necklace because I needed him to.’

‘And?’ pressed Naomi.

Elio huffed a breath, closed his eyes and wet his lips again before opening them, deciding to show a little fire of his own, ‘Look, what do you want to know? What do you think? This will be easier if you just ask.’

Naomi looked momentarily taken aback at his forthrightness, but after a moment she nodded very slightly, and any fight that she had with him fled her frame.

‘Yes,’ she said softly, ‘I imagine it would be. But I’m scared.’

‘What are you scared of?’ asked Elio, his voice gentle.

‘Of losing everything,’ said Naomi, her voice barely more than a whisper.

‘Of losing your marriage?’ asked Elio.

Naomi shook her head, looking down at her hands, ‘No. I don’t think you can lose something that you never really had. I already said that we should never have gotten married; we were practically forced into that. But I am scared of losing him from my life. He’s the only confidante I’ve ever had. The last six months have been so difficult without that.’

‘That will never happen,’ said Elio his mind spinning – six months? That was much longer than he had been back in Oliver’s life. Had things been breaking down between them for longer than he had expected?

He took a breath before he continued, ‘Whatever is said, or by whom, he has always told me that he cares very deeply for you. That he loves you as a best friend should. If you want him in your life; he will be there.’

Naomi took a shuddering breath and look back up at him. She was crying now, and Elio realised – much to his surprise – that he also had tears on his face, matching hers. He didn’t know when he had started crying.

‘ _Tell me,_ ’ she said, ‘Tell me what I think I already know. Are you…together?’

‘We have been seeing each other,’ said Elio, deciding that he just didn’t have the energy to skirt the truth anymore, ‘But we are not together. We can’t be; he is your husband.’

Naomi closed her eyes, a few more tears spilling down her face as she did so. She nodded very slightly.

‘Are you lovers?’ she asked, opening her eyes again and looking at him with an honest open gaze.  

Elio nodded; deciding that words were probably not the best option right now.

‘How long?’ she asked.

‘Since September,’ said Elio, ‘But we had something last summer, when he was with us in Italy.’

Naomi nodded again, taking a few shuddering breaths, trying to stop the flow of her tears, ‘ _I thought so.’_

‘He was going to tell you,’ Elio said, ‘He wanted to come clean.’

Naomi hiccoughed through her tears, ‘I don’t know what to do. What do I do?’

Just then the door opened and Annella walked back in. Elio couldn’t decide whether it was the worst or best timing in the world. She was carrying a cup holster with four drinks in it. The fourth drink was explained a moment later as his father walked in just behind her. She put the drinks down on the bedside table and turned to hand Naomi hers as she noticed she was crying.

‘Oh, my dear!’ she said instantly, and reached up her sleeve where she always carried a handkerchief. She produced it, and handed it to Naomi.

‘It’s clean,’ she said with a smile, ‘Here, keep it.’

Naomi looked momentarily taken aback and then took the proffered handkerchief and used it to dry her eyes and clean her face.

‘Thank you,’ she said to Annella, ‘You’re very kind.’

‘ _C’est rein ma cher_ ,’ said Annella with a shrug.

‘ _Mamma_ ,’ Elio warned, ‘ _Je ne pense pas qu’elle parle français.’_

Naomi shook her head and got slowly to her feet, ‘It’s alright; I’m going to go. I don’t want to take it more of your time.’

‘You’re not,’ said Elio, wanting to reach for her, to apologise, to explain, ‘You don’t have to go.’

‘We should just never have ended up here,’ whispered Naomi, looking down at him, ‘We were pushed together. We thought it for the best to do what we were told. That we would be able to figure it out. But do you know the worst tragedy in the world? It’s two people who should be best friends, trying to pretend to be in love with each other. To play act that out in front of their families in order to try and be free; it destroys what came before. It should just never have happened.’

Elio saw his dad step forward, a troubled look on his face, ‘If I may?’

Naomi half turned towards him, taking in the kindly figure and the bespectacled face. Elio didn’t know what it was about his father, but he just had a way of putting people at their ease without really trying.

‘It won’t solve any problems,’ he said gently, ‘But I’ve always found that wishing for things in the past to change is a futile exercise. Those things have happened. The only thing we can do is change what happens going forward.’

Naomi looked shocked at this statement, her eyes wide but dry, as if she didn’t quite know how to react. Then the stillness was a broken half a second later when the door burst open and hit the wall behind it with a thump.

‘Naomi! There you are sweetie! What are you doing in here?’

Elio looked around to see two women and a man who looked awfully familiar standing in the doorway of his room. He was bewildered as to their sudden appearance.

‘Err, I’m alright mom,’ said Naomi, looking slightly embarrassed, ‘I just wanted to talk to the…’

‘- Well come along,’ said the woman, snapping her fingers, ‘They’re going to bring Oliver round in a moment, and you should be there.’

‘I…’ started Naomi, glancing across at Annella and Samuel, but then all the fight seemed to go out of her, ‘Yes, mother.’

The severe woman standing by the door didn’t seem to even take notice of the other people in the room. It might have been that she found Naomi in a broom cupboard for all the attention she paid to the other three people in front of her.

Naomi started to walk to the door, her walk somewhat disrupted by the weight she was carrying in front of her. Before she reached the group clustered there she turned back to look at the group by the gurney, her eyes especially seeking out Annella and Samuel’s.

‘Can I speak with you in a bit?’ she asked softly, ‘After..?’

‘Of course _ma cher_ ,’ said Annella, ‘We’ll be here.’

The smallest of smiles passed over Naomi’s lips, and she looked slightly more at ease as she turned back to the group. She didn’t speak to her mother as she passed them, and exited the room as if she were alone. The other woman and the man followed her, and Elio realised why the man looked familiar. He must be Oliver’s father; he could see the strength of his jaw in that face, and the shape of the brow, and the height as well. He didn’t have a chance to look for any more than a second as he turned and was gone, his face looking troubled.

‘ _Quelle belle femme_ ,’ said his mother under his breath, her tone full of sarcasm, looking after the group that had just left.

‘ _Mamma!_ ’ said Elio, a small smile crossing his features and then let out a deep breath. Suddenly he felt utterly exhausted, as if every bone in his body was made of lead. He wanted nothing more than to sink into the bed and to sleep for a week. But his mind was a hive of activity; what had he done? He had told Naomi his secret; something Oliver had said he would do. Would Oliver hate him for it? He felt another tear slide down his cheek at the sheer overwhelming enormity of what had happened in those quiet twenty minutes. It wasn’t like he’d imagined at all; there had been no shouting, no screaming, no accusations, and no flying fists. He hadn’t needed to defend his intentions or his passions. In a way that was more unsettling. He wished Oliver was here with him.

‘Elio?’ his father spoke, causing him to look up.

 _‘Si, papa?_ ’ Elio asked.

‘What happened?’ he asked.

‘I told her,’ said Elio without any preamble, ‘About Oliver and I. She asked; so I told her.’

He saw his parents exchange a glance that held a conversation in just that look.

‘And what did she say?’ said his father.

‘Well you saw her,’ said Elio, ‘She’s just sad. She wishes that she and Oliver had never gotten married. That they were pretty much forced into it by their families because they’d been such close friends for years. She wished they could just go back to the way they were. But of course they can’t. She doesn’t know what to do. I think she feels trapped. She wants to turn back, but can’t.’

Annella shook her head, ‘No. That can’t happen. On any count.’

‘We all need to speak,’ said Samuel, ‘This isn’t a conversation that you should be having between the two of you, without Oliver.’

‘So what?’ asked Elio, ‘I should have stalled? I shouldn’t have told her?’

‘No,’ said Samuel, ‘I think that was going to happen. You didn’t tell her; you just confirmed what she already knew. But in order to find a way forward all of you need to talk; if you can.’

Elio nodded and then closed his tired eyes; feeling a surge of relief just by doing that, ‘ _Mon Dieu_ , I’m so tired.’

‘It’s okay _mia cara_ ,’ said Annella, coming up beside him and putting his bed down so that it was flatter and he could lie out more comfortably, ‘Sleep. We’ll be here.’

Elio nodded, feeling as if he had regressed to childhood, as his mother smoothed a curl off his forehead as he closed his eyes. He felt his exhaustion wash over him; this morning had taken it out of him utterly, and he was so tired he didn’t even have the capacity to worry about what would come next. His heart went out to the woman with his mother’s handkerchief. She was alone at the moment, adrift without anyone to throw her a life raft. He wanted to help her, and judging by what his parents had said – so did they. They would go and find her in a short while; this was something that they could help each other with. Naomi didn’t hate him, or Oliver it seemed. She was stuck, just like they all were, in a situation that none of them wanted to be in.  


	26. Tidal Wave

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am overwhelmed by some of the beautiful comments I got on the last chapter! Thank you so much for your encouraging words and nice messages - it truly means the world to me. If I haven't got round to replying yet, I'm really sorry, I've been away all weekend, and thought I better concentrate on getting this knocked up instead! 
> 
> I hope you enjoy! 
> 
> xxx

Elio awoke with a start to the sound of a gunshot. He sat up straight in bed and gasped in pain as a flash of excruciating pain went through his ribs. As his mind caught up with the reality of his waking life he realised that it hadn’t been a gunshot, and that there was a rabidly angry woman standing in his room. The sound had been her slamming the door open so that it crashed into the wall behind it, showering the floor in chipped paint and plaster. She looked like she was about to explode; her eyes were wide and she looked like she was drooling slightly; if it had been possible he wouldn’t have been surprised to see steam coming out of her ears. Another woman was stood just behind her, holding her hand, but rather than raging; she was crying profusely, and seemed unable to stop.

‘What the hell are you talking about?!’ Elio heard his mother yell. She was standing in of him, her hackles well and truly up; a she-bear protecting her cub.

‘I want to talk to your little _faggot_ of a son!’ the woman screamed, ‘How dare you shield him?’

‘He’s my son!’ Annella yelled back, ‘How _dare you_ come in here, screaming obscenities?’

‘Mother!’ another voice joined the melee, and Elio watched wide-eyed as Naomi appeared in the room, it clearly having taken her a bit longer to catch up due to the more sedate pace she had to walk, ‘Don’t you dare behave like this!’

‘Me?!’ screeched the woman, not looking at her daughter, ‘Me?? This sodomite has _ruined_ everything – your marriage, your husband, your life Naomi!!’

‘No!’ shouted Naomi forcefully, ‘No he hasn’t – it takes two to-’

‘Don’t you dare!’ the other woman whose face was streaked with tears spoke for the first time, ‘Don’t you _dare_ blame my son! Oliver has been led astray by this… _this_ … catamite!’

Elio was so taken aback by all of this that he had no idea what he was supposed to do. It wasn’t like he could move very fast in order to take physical action, and he certainly wasn’t about to speak and add more fuel to whatever fire was raging inside of the apoplectically angry woman standing in his room. He looked across at his father, was standing at the end of the bed with his mouth slightly open, equally startled by the happenings of the last minute or so. Then he closed his mouth and slowly moved forward, taking Annella by the shoulders and standing just in front of her, letting her relax for a second.

‘You ladies need to leave, right now,’ he said firmly, in a voice that trucked no disobedience, ‘My son is resting, recovering, and he needs peace and quiet. You should be ashamed of yourself.’

‘Yes, we will…’ started Naomi, but was cut off by her mother screeching.

‘You should be ashamed of yourself! For raising a boy imbued with sin and uncleanliness!!’

‘Madam,’ said Samuel, ‘You will remove yourself from this room this moment, or I will remove you personally.’

‘You wouldn’t dare!’ she shouted.

‘Mother, just leave!’ Naomi shouted desperately.

Annella had moved to the telephone and picked up the receiver, ‘You have three seconds, or I will call security.’

The woman was breathing as though she had just run an Olympic sprint, staring at all of them, her eyes burning holes in Elio as her gaze caught his; he tried not to look away. She took Samuel’s threat seriously, however, and with the other woman stalked towards the door.

‘This isn’t the end of this!’ she yelled from the doorway, ‘God says ‘ _You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; it is an abomination!_ And any who harbour abominations shall be punished by God too!’

Then she left, the other woman still holding her hand.

There was a moment of complete stillness after they had left; as if everyone in the room was recovering from the storm that had just swept through them all.

‘I’m so sorry,’ whispered Naomi, ‘I had no idea she would behave like that,’

Annella looked across at her, ‘It’s not your fault _ma cher.’_

Naomi’s lip wobbled as she fought to hold back tears, ‘Yes, it is. She overheard me talking to Oliver. I didn’t know she was in the room with Jennifer. I thought they’d gone with our fathers to go and get lunch. But she heard me speaking to Oliver…’

A silence met this statement; what had she said to Oliver? She didn’t seem to be forthcoming about that piece of information.

‘I have to see him,’ said Elio, as he started to move to get out of bed; it was a slow operation to do so, but he was determined.

‘You’re supposed to be resting!’ said Annella desperately.

‘I don’t care,’ said Elio, putting his feet on the floor, and winced as a shot of pain went through him from his healing ribs and still-bruised body.

‘Well at least go in this,’ said Sam, appearing around the end of the bed with the chair that the doctors had been using to ferry him to various check-ups.

Elio glared at the chair, ‘I feel like an invalid in that.’

‘Hate to break it to you sweetie; you are at the moment,’ said Annella, with a small smile on her face, ‘Come on, get in and we’ll take you down.’

‘Was he awake when you left?’ asked Elio of Naomi, who was still standing in the corner, not really knowing where to put herself.

Naomi nodded, ‘Considering his mother screamed loud enough to wake the dead, I suspect so.’

Elio looked pained at the thought, and shifted his weight into the chair, as clearly his parents weren’t going to allow him to hobble out on his own.

‘Come on,’ he said to his mother, who was hesitating whilst looking at his father.

‘I’ll be there in a minute,’ said Samuel, answering the unasked question in Annella’s eyes. He wanted to talk to Naomi.

Elio didn’t see her nod, but as she started to push him to the door he figured that she had agreed.

‘Are you alright Elly?’ asked Annella as they walked out of the room.

‘Yes, I’m alright,’ said Elio, and surprisingly he realised it was true. It was if the bandaid had been ripped off a wound. He’d been in living in a comfortable bubble with Oliver these past months, and now that had well and truly burst. There was something that he had to do in order to start making everything better, and it seemed as if his vision had descended into a pinprick until that was achieved.

It wasn’t far to Oliver’s room; he knew that because he had managed to walk there the other night when his watchful parents hadn’t been observing his every movement. The door was open where someone had clearly slammed through it, and Elio was greeted by a distressing image as Annella wheeled him into the room, which made him cry out.

Oliver was standing by the end of the bed, clutching the end of it as he leaned heavily on it. He was gray in the face, sweating, and his other hand was clutching at his lower stomach where Elio imagined his healing wounds were. He was trying to walk around to the door.

‘Oliver, _mi carino!_ ’ said Annella, abandoning Elio in the chair and rushing past him to support Oliver before he fell, ‘What are you doing?’

‘I-I knew they’d be c-coming to you. Heard them shout…’ gasped Oliver, ‘I had to try…’

Annella helped him sit down on the side of the bed, close to the pillows. Elio desperately wanted to help him, but he could barely lift himself at the moment, let alone lift Oliver.

‘Come on,’ said Annella, ‘Let’s get you back into bed,’

Oliver’s face was screwed up in a pain and his gray complexion was slightly tinged with pink as Annella took his feet and helped him lie back down. Oliver was so used to being self-sufficent that to have to rely on anybody else was embarrassing for him. Elio felt something small break inside of him at that moment and all he wanted to do was hold him. Oliver didn’t need coddling, however, but he did need someone to tell him that it was alright to feel pain and to need help dealing with it.

When he was settled in again, Elio used his hands on the wheels to approach the edge of the bed. Oliver was breathing heavily through the pain, but he seemed to be in control of it.  

‘Hey,’ he said softly to Oliver, who opened his eyes and turned his head slightly to look down at him.

‘Hey you,’ he said, his voice still tinged with pain.

Elio reached for his hand instantly and kissed it.

‘Do you need some more meds?’ asked Elio, looking for the dial on his stand.

Oliver half-smiled as Elio reached for it, ‘I don’t think it works. I’ve been twiddling this dial for ages and it doesn’t seem to be getting any better.’

‘Probably so you don’t overdose on whatever it is,’ said Elio with a chuckle, ‘Or maybe the nurse needs to come and give you some more. Mom could you -?’

‘ _Si mi caro_ ,’ said Annella, ‘I’ll see who I can find.’

Annella left the room, and Elio looked back at Oliver, his gorgeous blue eyes looking into him, and Elio wanted to weep for joy. To think he’d dreamt that he would never see those eyes again.  

‘I was so scared,’ he said looking at Oliver’s face.

‘So was I,’ admitted Oliver with a rueful grin.

‘I thought you were going to die,’ said Elio, ‘Don’t joke about it!’

‘I’m not,’ said Oliver seriously, ‘I thought I might die as well. I was terrified. We all think we’ll be so strong, but then when it comes to it… I was so afraid.’

Elio squeezed his hand and kissed each of the knuckles; wanting to let Oliver know that everything was alright. That they’d survived. There was a pause as neither of them spoke.

‘I came to see you the other night,’ said Elio.

Oliver smiled gently, ‘I thought you did. Or I thought you might have done; but then again, I thought I might of dreamed that. I’ve been having some absolutely whacked up dreams whilst on these meds.’

‘Me too,’ said Elio, ‘But no, not a dream.’

‘I love you,’ said Oliver, ‘I wish I could kiss you,’

Elio got slowly to his feet, ignoring the flash of pain through his body, he stood so that he could lean down and gently peck Oliver on the lips, feeling them curl into a small smile under his mouth. He did it again, letting his mouth linger for a moment, allowing himself to indulge in the softness of the skin under his lips for a moment.  

‘Thank you,’ said Oliver as Elio pulled back, so that his mouth was inches from Oliver’s and he was looking at his face.

‘They know,’ he said eventually.

‘I know,’ said Oliver quietly, ‘That’s where I was going. I was trying to get to your room; knowing that’s where they’d go.’

‘Are you angry at me?’ asked Elio, ‘For telling Naomi?’

Oliver’s mouth twisted up at one corner, ‘It’s not ideal. But no, I’m not angry. This wasn’t how anything was supposed to go.’

‘No,’ said Elio gesturing to the hospital bed, ‘No it wasn’t. What have they told you?’

‘The doctors?’ Oliver asked, and Elio nodded.

‘Just that I was very lucky,’ said Oliver, ‘That the second knife wound was a hairsbreadth away from my kidney… and that would have been a very different story.’

Elio felt sick, but he swallowed the bile that had risen in his throat, ‘How long are you going to have to stay?’

‘They don’t know exactly,’ said Oliver, ‘They’re keeping an eye on how I do. You?’

‘Until the end of the week, and then they’ll see about letting me go.’

‘I think it’s going to be a bit longer for me,’ said Oliver, wincing as he shifted slightly.

‘Probably,’ said Elio, ‘Sorry to break it to you,’

‘I surmised as much,’ said Oliver with a small grin, which quickly faded as his mind went back to the matter at hand, ‘Naomi wasn’t all that angry. She was just upset that I hadn’t come clean.’

Elio nodded, ‘She was just sad that it had come to this.’

‘I don’t know what to do,’ said Oliver quietly, ‘Now that our parents know; all hell is going to break loose.’

‘Well I don’t know, there was definitely some kind of shrieking devil in my room about half an hour ago,’ said Elio.

Oliver grinned, ‘Naomi’s mom? Yeah, I heard that from here.’

Elio’s eyebrows rose, ‘I think the whole upper east side heard that,’

‘Well I guess my coming out is sorted then,’ said Oliver.

‘My parents will help us,’ said Elio, ‘However they can.’

‘I know,’ said Oliver, ‘And I wish they didn’t have to do that; I don’t want to lay my problems at their door.’

‘They’re not just your problems doofus,’ said Elio, ‘I love you. So, they’re my problems too. My dad is talking to Naomi right now. I don’t know what he’s going to tell her; but I know they want to help her too.’

Oliver nodded, ‘So do I. It’s not her fault that we’re in this mess.’

‘It’s nobody’s fault,’ said Elio, ‘It’s just somewhere we find ourselves. Fault doesn’t need to be apportioned.’

‘That’s definitely not what my parents are going to think,’ said Oliver ruefully.

‘Yes, I know about that –

‘- You!’

A voice came from behind him, to which Elio tried to turn around and gasped out in pain as his body loudly reminded him that he couldn’t move quickly at the moment.

‘Get away from him!’

‘Mom!’ shouted Oliver, clearly able to see better than Elio was as he lowered himself back into the chair and tried to manoeuvre himself around to face his adversary.

‘He will not be corrupted by you anymore!’ she shouted, advancing on Elio as he finally turned properly, and jabbing her finger into his chest which made him wince.

‘Mom!’ shouted Oliver again, ‘Leave him the fuck alone; I am not corrupted by anyone!’

‘You be quiet!’ shouted the enraged blonde woman in front of them, ‘We are transferring you from this cesspit of sin today, and then you will be going to see a therapist young man!’

‘I will not go,’ said Oliver, ‘And you will leave this room right now, or I will –

‘- You see?’ she screeched, ‘You have been corrupted! Never would you have spoken to me like this before; you have a _wife_ Oliver! And a child on the way! You will see the right way again!’

Elio’s mouth was hanging open in sheer amazement, how could anyone be so _ignorant_?  

‘No,’ said Oliver, ‘I know exactly what the right way is. And it’s not denying who I am, or who I love, anymore. Not for you, not for an unforgiving God, not for anyone. Get. Out.’

‘But –

‘Get out!’ roared Oliver, and then wheezed in pain at the movement this caused.

The woman looked at her son in complete shock, as if she couldn’t comprehend what was happening. Then she walked to the door, pulling herself together as she walked. She turned in the door, and looked at them both before pointing her finger at the pair of them.

‘This is unnatural. If you do this Oliver, you will not hear from us again; you will have no more money for us. You will be on your own!’

Silence greeted this pronunciation, but then Elio felt a hand on his shoulder, and he knew that Oliver had shifted so he could place his hand there, warm against his body. He raised his own hand, and took Oliver’s fingers in his. The woman in the doorway made a noise akin to ‘tchach!’ and turned to storm out. There was a pause of a split second after she had gone, but then Oliver made a noise of pain sucked in through taut lips and Elio twisted around to see his face contorted into a grimace. His complexion, which had been slowly returning to its normal colour, had faded to an unhealthy gray again.

‘Uh!’ said Oliver, gasping in pain, ‘Fuck, Elio, I think I’m bleeding.’

‘Oh fuck!’ said Elio, trying to direct the chair around to call the doctor, where had his mom got to? In the end, he abandoned the chair and got up as quickly as he could; ignoring the searing pain in his side and in his hips, to push the red button on the wall aside from Oliver’s head.

A moment or two later two doctors strode into the room, ‘What’s the problem; what’s happened?’

‘Uh, I think I’m bleeding,’ said Oliver, as one of them whipped back the covers. Elio’s eyes flew wide as he saw the bright red stain seeping across Oliver’s lower stomach, soaking his hospital gown and the sheet underneath him.

‘Yes, it looks like you’ve torn your stitches in the second incision,’ said one of the doctors, ‘Applying pressure; Dr McCourt can you please get a non-traumatic surgical team in here, and the plastic surgeon?’

The other doctor nodded and strode out of the room, taking as much notice of Elio as if he were a pot plant by the wall.

‘What happened?’ his mother had reappeared, this time with his father and Naomi in tow.

‘T-tore my stitches,’ gasped Oliver, as the doctor changed the pressure pads over.

‘We should go,’ said Sam, looking at Elio as the surgical team flooded into the room to deal with Oliver. Elio was torn; he wanted to stay and hold Oliver, but at the same time he knew he would just get in the way. He watched as they turned Oliver onto his side, and began to remove the gown so they could see what they were working on properly.

‘Elio!’ said Annella, as he limped out of the way of an intern pushing a cart.

He nodded dumbly and allowed himself to be put back into the chair by his mother and taken out of the room. Naomi stood looking troubled for a moment, not knowing where she should be.

‘You can come with us dear,’ said Samuel, holding out his hand to the stricken girl. She dithered for a moment longer before taking it, and allowing herself to be led out of the room.

‘What happened?’ asked Annella again as they arrived back into Elio’s room.

‘His mom came,’ said Elio, ‘And he yelled, which I think tore his stitches.’

‘What did she say?’ asked Naomi as Annella helped him back into bed.

‘Something about money, and being cut off, and something about therapy.’

Naomi went pale; ‘Really? I didn’t know she’d stoop that low. I have to go, see if I can talk some kind of reason into them.’

‘That shouldn’t just fall to you you know,’ said Sam gently.

‘I’ve got to try,’ said Naomi, ‘They’re being ridiculous.’

‘If you need one of us to be there…’ Annella tailed off.

‘I think I’ve got to go by myself,’ said Naomi, ‘At least for now; seeing as they seem to think that Elio is the devil incarnate,’

Elio couldn’t help but chuckle at that, ‘How exciting.’

‘Elio!’ said Annella, tapping him on the shoulder. He couldn’t help but giggle; to do anything else would mean that he either had to cry or start raging, and he was tired of doing both.

‘Elio?’

Elio looked up to see Rory and Alana peering into his room.

He couldn’t help but chuckle, ‘It’s like Grand Central Station in this room today…’

Annella tapped him on the shoulder again, ‘Come in girls,’

‘I’ll go,’ said Naomi, and took her bulky frame out of the relatively small room, freeing up some of the space.

‘Hey guys,’ said Elio as Rory and Alana came in properly. He noticed Alana was holding a few books under her arm.

‘I brought you something to read,’ said Alana, ‘I know how boring hospitals can be,’

‘Well this one has been nothing but exciting this morning,’ said Elio with a grin.

‘Why, what’s happening?’ asked Rory, sitting on the end of his bed whilst being careful not to squish his feet.

‘We’ll just go and grab some coffee; do you want anything?’ said Samuel, holding Annella’s hand and looking over at them.

‘I’m alright Mr Perlman,’ said Alana, ‘Thank you.’

‘Am I allowed coffee?’ asked Elio, wondering if he should have caffeine whilst he was still on the pain meds.

‘We’ll get you decaff,’ said Annella, clearly thinking the same thing as him. Elio pulled a face, but then shrugged, figuring it was better than nothing.

‘Can I have a tea?’ asked Rory, ‘Hold on, I’ll just get some money…’

‘Don’t worry about it dear,’ said Annella, waving away Rory’s attempts to get money out of her purse.

‘Are you sure?’ asked Rory, blushing slightly, ‘Oh, well, thank you.’

Annella smiled, ‘Alright; be back in a bit. Try not to hurt yourself in the meantime Elio.’

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’ asked Elio indignantly whilst Alana chuckled. Annella didn’t reply but just grinned as she left the room, leaving him with Alana and Rory to attempt to fill them in on what had happened since they had last seen him.  


	27. The River Divides

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the lovely comments on the last chapter! I know there was a lot to process, and lots of drama! This chapter is a wee bit calmer (with lots and lots of dialogue - hence the slightly shorter word count!), and I promise that there will be some out-of-hospital happenings in the next chapter! 
> 
> We're nearly at the final stretch readers! Two more chapters + the epilogue and then 'After The Flood' will be squared away. I hope you're enjoying reading it as much as I've been enjoying writing it. I go on holiday for a bit in ten days, so I'm aiming to get this finished before then. Not promising, but I'm going to try. 
> 
> Hope you all have a fabby weekend... 
> 
> xxx

‘My parents want me to go home with them,’ said Naomi, ‘They’re leaving in a few hours, and I don’t know what they’ll do if I don’t go with them.’

‘What do you mean?’ asked Annella, holding her hand whilst sitting next to her in Oliver’s room, in which they were all gathered. Elio was watching them both whilst leaning against the far wall of the room. He found it nice to be able to stand when he wanted to now, rather than having to just sit or lie about for long periods of time. Whilst he was stood there he noticed that his tongue kept poking out to play with the scar on his lip; he’d had the stitches out yesterday, but there was still a noticeable mark where they had been. He guessed it would take a while for it to fade completely. He mentally shook himself, realising that this wasn’t what he was supposed to be concentrating on right now.

Naomi had looked worried before speaking to answer Annella’s question, a few tears gathering in her eyes but not falling as she thought about what she was going to say, her voice trembling very slightly, ‘I don’t have anything without them. They own my house. They give me money to live. I don’t have a job, because mom always said I’d do more good by volunteering in the community. Bit of a waste of my degree really. I don’t know what I’ll do if I don’t go with them…’

A small silence greeted this statement.

‘Do you want to go with them?’ asked Annella cautiously.

‘I don’t know,’ said Naomi, a singular tear escaping and sliding down her face, ‘I mean; I don’t agree with them in any way, or how they’ve acted. But at the same time… they are my parents. I don’t know what my life would be like without them.’

She hiccoughed as she finished the sentence, and fished the handkerchief Annella had given her earlier that week out of her sleeve to dry her eyes.

‘If you go, they’re going to try and stop me seeing our child, aren’t they?’ asked Oliver, his voice low and quiet.

Naomi didn’t reply but simply nodded, ‘And they want me to seek an annulment.’

Elio heard Oliver swallow after she said this, ‘Is that what you want? For it to be as if we were never married?’

‘No, because it’s not true,’ said Naomi, ‘I don’t want this child to grow up without a father.’

‘Well, does that give you your answer?’ asked Annella gently, glancing across at Samuel who was standing by the wall.

Naomi hiccoughed again, ‘I know, I know. I’m just scared. I’ll be left with nothing if I do this.’

‘Not nothing,’ said Oliver, ‘I won’t let that happen. I’m still going to help support you.’

‘But you’re going to lose your flat as well,’ said Naomi, ‘I heard your mother telling mine. They’re not going to support you either. They’ve cut you off. Won’t you lose where you live?’

Oliver nodded slowly, ‘Yes, I’ll have to move out of where I am now. But I can afford to rent somewhere nearby on my salary, and then I can use whatever is left to help you.’

Whichever way this was squared, it was a fairly grim proposition, and not for the first time Elio was struck by the thought at how much easier these people’s lives might have been if Oliver had never met him. They’d just be able to get on with living. He realised there was no point in having these thoughts, because it was in the past, but it didn’t stop them from occasionally sneaking into his brain nonetheless.

Samuel shifted slightly from foot to foot in Elio’s peripheral vision, ‘I have a proposal for you Naomi. I know I’ve only known you for a week, but I hope you’ll hear me out anyway?’

‘Of course,’ said Naomi, ‘You’ve both been so kind to me through all of this…’

‘Come to Italy,’ said Samuel, ‘Start a new life there. We can vouch for you, support you through the legalities of the process, and then you will have a chance to start again. Whilst you’re finding your feet there are plenty of spare bedrooms in our country house. Then, once you know what you’re doing, you can branch out on your own.’

Naomi’s mouth was open, and Elio was sure that the look was mirrored on his own face as well.

‘Did you know about this?’ whispered Naomi to Annella, who was still holding her hand.

‘ _Si, mia caro,’_ said Annella gently, ‘And I think it’s a wonderful idea. I know it’ll be scary. I know it’s a big step to take, but it might be the best thing for you to do.’

‘But I don’t speak Italian,’ said Naomi, her mind trying to latch on to some semblance of fact within the crazy.

Samuel smiled at her, ‘You’ll learn. I did.’

There was a pause before Oliver spoke, ‘I think it’s a wonderful idea Nai. If it’s something you could imagine doing. I think it would be amazing for you, and for our child.’

Naomi bit her lip and then shook her head, ‘I can’t make this decision right now. Not just like this, I need some time. And if my parents have their way then I haven’t got any.’

Samuel nodded, ‘I understand. It is an awful lot to think about. Why don’t you tell your parents that you’re going to stay another night in the city? I’m quite happy to accompany you on the train tomorrow if that’s what they’re worried about.’

Naomi smiled slightly, ‘I think they’d be more worried about that than if I caught it on my own. Your liberal ideas might start to have some effect on me.’

Samuel chuckled lightly, ‘Well, it’s up to you.’

Naomi took a deep breath and then got to her feet slowly, ‘I’m going to go for a walk. Then I’ll decide what I’m doing for the next twenty-four hours. If my parents come looking for me… well, I doubt they will come in here, but if they do, then tell them I’ll be back in a bit.’

Oliver nodded, ‘I will do.’

Naomi left the room, leaving just the four of them in the space. Oliver closed his eyes momentarily before looking up at the ceiling.

‘I think I need to get a lawyer,’ he said, ‘I just know. There’s no way that her parents are going to let this go without a fight. Whatever she chooses to do. And if she chooses to go back to them, I’ll need a lawyer to fight to see my kid.’

‘Surely they won’t –’ started Elio.

‘- you’ve met them,’ said Oliver cutting him off, ‘Yes, they will. They won’t want me anywhere near their grandchild. And I am not being kept away from my kid.’

No matter what he thought about people’s better nature, Elio allowed that this was probably true, judging by what he had seen from Naomi’s parents over the past few days.

‘But I’m stuck here,’ said Oliver clearly frustrated, ‘And soon to have no flat. I don’t know when the hell I’m going to find a lawyer that will help me out for whatever money I can afford to give them; which won’t be much.’

‘We’ll find a place,’ said Samuel, ‘If everything really does go to hell, then we’ll find somewhere to rent where everyone can find their feet.’

‘That’s very kind of you Pro, but I couldn’t ask-’

‘- You’re not asking’ said Samuel, taking his glasses off and cleaning them on the hem of his shirt, ‘I’m telling you.’

Elio couldn’t help but smile at his father’s kindly, but trucked-no-nonsense, tone. He wasn’t about to let Oliver martyr himself just so he could maintain what he saw as his pride. There was no shame in needing help and receiving it, and Elio realised that his father would, very gently, enforce this with Oliver.

Oliver struggled internally for a moment before Elio saw the fight visibly leave him and he whispered, ‘Thank you Pro.’

Samuel didn’t say anything, but just returned his glasses to his nose and shrugged very slightly.

‘I’m going to go and get something to eat,’ said Annella, breaking whatever tension there was in the room, ‘You coming Elio; Sammie?’

‘Is it dinner time already?’ asked Samuel looking at his watch, his eyebrows shooting up as he read it.

Annella was looking at Elio expectantly for an answer.

‘I’ll catch you up in a bit,’ said Elio.

‘Alright,’ said Annella, standing up to leave. Sam walked up next to her and took her hand before they both left the room.

‘What’s up?’ asked Oliver looking over at him.

‘Nothing,’ said Elio, pushing himself away from the wall he had been leaning on for what seemed like forever, ‘I just wanted to spend some time with you. I haven’t been alone with you properly for a week. And I wanted to say thank you; for hearing my dad out.’

‘He’s a good man,’ said Oliver, ‘It’s just hard to not be able to help myself.’

‘I know,’ said Elio approaching his gurney.

‘Come here,’ said Oliver, patting the side of the gurney opposite where his healing wounds were. Elio walked around to the side he was gesturing to, whilst Oliver very cautiously shifted so that there was space for Elio to sit down on it.

‘Lie down?’ said Oliver, ‘You’re skinny; there’s space.’

Elio smiled, ‘It’ll take me a moment.’

Oliver chuckled lightly to himself, ‘I know.’

 Elio sucked in a breath at the ache that rolled through his body as he manoeuvred himself into a lying down position next to Oliver’s form. His ribs and pelvis were still aching something fierce, but they were a lot better than a few days previously. It took him a few moments to lie down fully and turn on his side to look at Oliver. Oliver couldn’t turn on his side, but he was able to lift his arm, so Elio could snuggle a little into his body.

‘This is nice,’ breathed Elio. It seemed like forever since he had actually been able to be this close to Oliver, even though it had only been that week. He wondered whether it was because, at one point, he had been scared that he would never be able to be this close to him again. He pushed down that thought along with the bile that had risen in his throat because of it. He closed his eyes and listened to Oliver’s steading breathing, and the thump of his heart under his rib.

‘You’re getting out tomorrow, aren’t you?’ Oliver asked quietly after a moment of silence.

‘They’re doing some final checks tonight, but if everything is alright with those, then yes, I should be.’

‘Are you going to stay with your parents, or go back to your room?’ asked Oliver.

‘Probably my room,’ said Elio, ‘It’ll be easier that way. Plus, I can walk from there to here every day.’

‘You don’t have to come visit every day,’ said Oliver softly.

‘Shut up,’ mumbled Elio, ‘Of course I do. And it’s not about _have to_ , I want to.’

He felt Oliver twist a little so that he could lean down and kiss the top of his head, ‘Thank you. Hopefully it won’t be long until I can get out too.’

‘Yeah well, don’t try and rush, okay?’ said Elio, ‘I want you in mint condition.’

‘I won’t,’ said Oliver, ‘But if everything’s going fine, there’s no reason why I can’t rest and recover at home. It’ll be more comfortable than here at least.’

‘Hmmm,’ agreed Elio, knowing exactly what he meant.

‘I’m also bored,’ said Oliver.

Elio sat up slightly, looking down at him, ‘Bored? How can you be bored with everything that’s going on?’

‘That’s not what I meant,’ said Oliver, grinning at his obtuseness, ‘And you know it.’

Elio blew raspberry onto Oliver’s cheek, being careful to avoid the yellow and green bruising that was slowly fading away. He knew he own face wasn’t much better, but it was slowly healing up and getting back to normal. He’d tried to avoid looking in the mirror too much this week so he didn’t have to examine his swollen and battered face.

‘I think it’s a good idea though,’ said Oliver thoughtfully, ‘What your dad suggested to Naomi.’

‘So do I,’ said Elio.

‘If she can agree it to it, mind,’ said Oliver, ‘I mean, I know it’ll be a massive change for her, and that’s really scary thing to think about, but I think it would be good for her.’

‘Well I don’t know her as well as you do,’ said Elio, ‘But anything has got to be better than being forced to keep living with… _them_.’

‘Well she doesn’t live _with_ them,’ said Oliver, ‘But in the same community, yeah, I know. And they have always had this immense level of control over her. It’s part of the reason why she was keen to get married; just so that she could get away from them a bit. Guess that didn’t work out too well. I just feel so awful – I managed to turn her life upside down in the space of a week.’

‘That’s not true either,’ said Elio, ‘She knew that something was wrong. She just didn’t know what it was. People can still be hurt by things they can’t see y’know? But now we can all try and figure out a way forward.’

Elio heard, rather than saw, Oliver smile.

‘When did you get so wise?’

‘Blame my father,’ mumbled Elio, trying to bury himself back into the warmth of Oliver’s side.

He was interrupted from his endeavour by a somewhat timid knock at the door. He cautiously sat up, aware that he still couldn’t make any particularly speedy movements and turned. Oliver was also sitting up on his elbows to see who the visitor was.

‘Um hello?’ said the man in the doorway. Elio recognised him from the other day when he had been standing in the background of his hospital room, whilst his wife cried his eyes out in front of him.

‘What do you want, dad?’ asked Oliver, his tone very chilly.

‘Well, I was hoping I might be able to talk to you?’ said the man, stooping to step into the room slightly. Clearly Oliver’s height wasn’t some sort of anomaly, and it definitely ran in the family.

‘If you’re here to try and convince me that I need to go to therapy, or that I’m not really in love with Elio, then you can save your breath,’ said Oliver.

‘Er no, it wasn’t that,’ said his dad, looking between the two of them where Elio was still sitting beside Oliver on the bed, ‘Can I talk to you alone?’

Oliver looked stubborn, ‘Anything you have to say you can say in front of Elio.’

‘It’s alright,’ muttered Elio, ‘I said I’d catch up with my parents to go and get some food. They’re probably wondering what’s taking so long.’

‘Please stay,’ said Oliver, his eyes still narrow as he looked at his father, ‘Until I’ve heard the gist of what he wants to say.’

Elio looked at him, but nodded, sliding off the bed anyway to stand up, but he took Oliver’s hand in his own and squeezed.

‘Well I was just coming to say that your mother and I are leaving shortly,’ said Oliver’s father, ‘But I came to say that I will try my best to change her mind.’

This was not the statement Elio had been expecting. Oliver looked flabbergasted when Elio turned to look at him, almost hurting his neck at the speed at which he looked for his reaction.

‘What?’ asked Oliver, clearly taken aback.

‘Well, er, I’ve been thinking about it, and praying, since we found out,’ said the man, clearly uncomfortable, ‘And I thought that well… if God made you this way, then it must be how it was meant to be. Who are we to question it?’

Oliver looked stunned, and it took him a moment to formulate words, ‘Well, I’m not completely sure of the logic there dad… but I am extremely glad you’ve come to that conclusion.’

A smile broke out on the other man’s face at the words of his son. There was a pause as the man hesitated, unsure of how to continue the conversation. Elio felt a pang of pity for him, when he was so clearly out of his depth.

‘Are you okay now?’ said Elio to Oliver, feeling that this was a moment that they should really have together, without him.

Oliver nodded, ‘Thank you.’

Elio leaned down to kiss him on the cheek, but Oliver moved so that his kiss landed on his mouth. Elio wasn’t complaining, but he knew that this was more for Oliver’s father’s benefit than for his, just to test his reaction and his resolve.

‘I’ll see you in a bit,’ said Elio, his lips still close to Oliver’s as he spoke before standing up and turning around, ‘Nice to meet you properly, Mr Davis.’

‘Oh, um, nice to meet you too… Elio,’ said the man, holding out his hand. Elio took it and they shook hands for a moment, before Elio made to leave the room, his head spinning with the events of the day.


	28. Shallower Waters

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all your support of this story! We're nearly there - on the home stretch! Just one more chapter and then the epilogue... xxx

Two days later when Elio walked into Oliver’s room he found him sitting in a chair about two metres away from his gurney. He was reading a small stack of papers with a frown on his face, as if it were difficult to understand what was printed there.

‘Morning,’ said Elio, putting down the fruit he’d brought with him on the bedside table. Oliver had been complaining that the fruit in the hospital was virtually tasteless, so Elio had decided to bring some fresh from the hotel his parents were staying in. He’d brought some oranges and bananas, and with his tongue firmly in his cheek, he had also added a peach into the bowl. He’d leave that there for Oliver to find, and be amused by, later.

‘What’s that?’ he said, turning to Oliver.

‘Court papers,’ mused Oliver, not looking up.

‘What?’ asked Elio, confused, ‘That was fast.’

‘They’re not bespoke,’ said Oliver, ‘They’re basically the first papers to tell me that they’re intending to take me to court.’

‘They’re not messing around are they,’ said Elio, looking over Oliver’s shoulder at the papers, but he couldn’t really understand most of the legal language without sitting down to study, ‘What have they served?’

‘False representation and intention to defraud,’ said Oliver under his breath, ‘Basically that I pretended to be someone whom I’m not and therefore shouldn’t be allowed to have various things, including access to my kid or any moneys intended therewith.’

‘But Naomi went with them on the proviso they let her come back; said she needed more time to think about what my dad had said,’ said Elio, ‘So how can they do that?’

‘I imagine if she doesn’t come around, they’ll try and make her out as an unfit mother or something,’ said Oliver.

Elio was agog, ‘Would they do that? Can they do that?’

Oliver shook his head and rubbed his hand over his eyes, ‘I don’t know. I know what sort of people they are, and that when Carol – Naomi’s mom – has got the bit between her teeth she won’t let it go. I also know that they can afford good lawyers, so they’ll probably have a crack at whatever they can get.’

‘It’s insane,’ said Oliver, ‘I don’t understand it at all.’

Oliver put the papers down on the little table in his room.

‘How are you feeling today?’ asked Elio, kissing him on the top of head, and made to stand up again.

‘Uh-uh,’ said Oliver, tilting his head up, ‘Kiss me properly.’

Elio smirked and leaned down again to kiss him on the mouth, feeling the softness of Oliver’s lips under his. He’d not been able to kiss Oliver properly until just yesterday when the bruising had gone down enough on Oliver’s face so that it didn’t hurt him overly much. Elio moaned slightly as Oliver opened his mouth and deepened the kiss, bringing up one of his arms to catch Elio around the neck, to pull him in. Elio broke away a moment later, just resting his forehead against Oliver’s.

‘I can’t wait ‘til you get out of here,’ breathed Elio.

‘Not long now,’ said Oliver, with a smile.

‘Oh?’ said Elio, stepping back slightly. This was new news.

‘Yup,’ said Oliver, his eyes sparkling slightly, ‘The doc came in this morning and said because I seem to be healing up well, I should be able to get out by the end of the week.’

‘That’s amazing!’ said Elio, unable to help a little ‘eee’ of excitement from escaping his mouth.

‘What was that noise?!’ teased Oliver with a grin.

‘That was just me being really happy,’ said Elio, kissing Oliver’s face in various places in between the yellow and green bruising that was slowly fading away.

‘Although you’ll have to be super gentle with me for a bit,’ said Oliver, making a fake pout which made Elio chuckle.

‘Hold on a minute,’ said Elio straightening up and holding up his arm which was still in a cast, ‘I’ve still got a broken wrist and hand, and you’ve got healing knife wounds, and we’re both still bruised to shit. Don’t you think us having sex is going to be a bit difficult for a while?’

‘I’m sure we could… figure it out,’ said Oliver with a grin, ‘Slowly.’

Elio nudged Oliver on the shoulder as he giggled.

‘Do you think you could manage a walk outside?’ said Elio, looking up at the clock hanging on the wall.

‘Why?’ asked Oliver, ‘Got somewhere to be?’

‘I said I’d meet Rory for coffee at eleven before she goes back to St Louis for the holidays,’ said Elio, ‘I mean you’ve already managed to get dress with the clothes I brought you yesterday..?’

‘Yeah,’ said Oliver, ‘It was just nice to get out of that infernal hospital gown. It was giving me a really cold ass whenever I wasn’t laying down.’

‘Well we don’t want that do we?’ asked Elio with a grin, ‘I might have to warm it up for you,’

Oliver looked at him with the raised eyebrow, ‘That was quite possibly, the worse come-on you’ve ever managed to come out with.’

Elio chuckled and shrugged, ‘Alright; but will you come for coffee?’

Oliver nodded, ‘Yeah definitely, I think it would be great out of here for a bit. Although… I might need some help getting my shoes on. I’m not sure I can bend down that far.’

‘We will definitely have to incorporate that into the sex plans,’ said Elio, moving over to the side of the bed where he could find Oliver’s shoes.

‘Shut up,’ Oliver said from somewhere behind him, causing Elio to burst out giggling again.

**

It took some time to get to the coffee shop. First Elio had to run it past the nurse first, telling them that Oliver would back because they hadn’t cleared him for discharge, unless he wished to discharge himself. Seeing as he clearly didn’t they allowed him to go as long as he was back for his surgical consult at two. Elio assured the harassed looking nurse that he would deliver the invalid back long before then.

Once they left, their walking pace was much reduced, but Oliver refused to get into a taxi, saying it had been so long since he was able to walk about outside. It was really cold outside, but the sky was clear and the sun was shining. So even though they could see their breath with every exhalation, it was still a nice walk. Oliver was limping slightly, and people on the street were giving him odd looks, but he ignored them as Elio led the way to the coffee shop which Rory had specified.

‘Hey Elio…’ said Rory as they entered, getting up and coming towards them, ‘Oh, Oliver, I didn’t expect to see you out and about,’

‘I just fancied a little break from white walls and itchy pyjamas,’ said Oliver, ‘You don’t mind do you?’

‘Not at all!’ said Rory, ‘What would you like?’

‘Are you getting it?’ asked Elio, ‘I don’t mind.’

‘Nah, whatever,’ said Rory, ‘My treat.’

‘Oh, thanks,’ said Elio, ‘I’ll have an espresso, please.’

‘And I’ll just have a regular tea. The tea in the hospital is _shit_ ,’ said Oliver, ‘So I’ll be glad to get a nice one for once.’

‘Alright,’ said Rory, ‘Back in a second.’

She walked away towards the counter and joined the queue.

‘Yeah after I got out a few days ago -’

‘That makes it sound like prison.’

‘Whatever,’ said Elio, with a wave of his hand, ‘I begged my _mama_ to make me a decent cup of tea.’

‘One of the perks of when I finally get to go home,’ said Oliver.

‘One of many,’ said Elio, ‘Do you actually feel ready though?’

‘I think so,’ said Oliver with a shrug, ‘It’s difficult to tell isn’t it? My wounds are healing well. All the bruising is fading. All I’ve got to do is sit about, not do a lot, and get better. I want to be doing that at home.’

Elio nodded, ‘Yeah we still make quite a sight though,’

‘True,’ said Oliver, ‘By the way, did the officer in charge of our case get back in touch with you?’

Elio nodded again, ‘He rang my father through the hotel yesterday. I meant to tell you. Why do you ask?’

‘Just ‘cause they came to visit me yesterday morning at the hospital,’ said Oliver, ‘I assume they had the same information for you that they did for me?’

‘That they managed to identify the other members of the group?’ asked Elio, to which Oliver nodded, ‘Yeah. And that the one who had the knife confessed to being the one who attacked Hannah?’

‘Yeah,’ said Oliver softly, ‘Definitely not right in the head that one.’

‘So it seems,’ said Elio, ‘Whatever poison someone was dripping in his ear seemed to be bringing out the worst in him.’

‘As happens so often with these extreme opinions,’ said Oliver with a shrug, ‘Well, judging by what the police said yesterday, he’s going to be going away for quite a while. And we don’t even have to go to court, because there was a full confession made.’

‘Which is a relief,’ said Elio, ‘What did they say about the rest? _Papa_ didn’t tell me that; he was too focused on that other one.’

‘I think the one who gave the information was part of a plea bargain,’ said Oliver, ‘So he’ll probably get a suspended sentence or something. I don’t know about the others. I mean… they didn’t stab me… but it was still aggravated assault.’

‘That phrase always confuses me,’ mused Elio.

‘Which?’ said Oliver, raising an eyebrow.

‘” Aggravated assault”,’ said Elio, ‘I mean, you can’t really have assault that isn’t aggravated, can you? You can’t really have a polite assault… _Oh, um, excuse me sir, would you mind if I punched you in the face?_ ’

Oliver snorted with laughter and rolled his eyes, ‘Trust you to think about something like that.’

‘What?’ asked Elio grinning in response, ‘It’s true!’

‘I suppose it is,’ said Oliver, ‘You should take it up with Attorney General at some point. See if you can get the legal nomenclature changed.’

‘I’ll put it on my to-do list when I’ve got a spare two hundred years or something,’ said Elio, getting to his feet to help Rory with the drinks, as she was currently balancing hers on top of the two.

‘Thanks,’ she said as he put them down on the table.

‘Thanks for this Rory,’ said Oliver, taking a sip of the tea. A look of bliss came over his face a moment later and he quickly took another.

‘Good?’ asked Rory with a grin.

‘Better,’ said Oliver.

‘When are you leaving?’ Elio asked Rory.

‘In a couple of hours,’ said Rory with a shrug, ‘My aunt is coming to pick me up because she’s been in New York on business. We’ll fly home and then I’m there for three weeks.’

‘Not looking forward to it?’ asked Elio.

‘Well, it’s just home is so boring,’ said Rory, ‘And I’ll miss everyone back here.’

‘Awww I’ll miss you too Rory,’ Elio teased.

‘Jerk,’ she said, rolling her eyes, ‘I can’t even shove you in retaliation because I don’t know where you’re still broken.’

‘Everywhere,’ said Elio with a shrug, ‘That’s the easiest guess.’

‘Definitely getting better though?’ said Rory, ‘I mean, your face doesn’t look quite as messed up as it did the last time I saw you.’

‘Well then it’s going in the right direction,’ said Elio with a grin.

‘Yeah,’ said Oliver, sitting up straight with a wince, ‘He’s _almost_ pretty again.’

‘Hey!’ said Elio, ‘You’re supposed to love me whatever I look like!’

Oliver just grinned and shrugged, causing Rory to fall about giggling.

‘I heard they caught who did it?’ said Rory, and then by way of explanation, ‘It was on the news on the radio this morning.’

‘Oh, we made city news?’ said Oliver.

‘Yeah,’ said Rory, ‘After the riot, and then Hannah, everyone’s been a bit on edge. I hope it’s kind of petered out now though; I mean everyone knows that it’s the political extremists who are to blame, and the crazier they get, the less support they’re going to have, right?’

Oliver shrugged, ‘Except to those who like the crazy, and think everyone who isn’t a straight, white, middle class American deserves it.’

Rory shuddered, ‘It’s gross.’

‘Yup,’ said Oliver, ‘But people are always drawn to the fringe elements of the political spectrum when their own situation starts to go south. It’s how fascism got so popular in the first place, and then communism, although that’s falling apart now.’

‘Hmmm,’ Rory murmured, ‘Strange though, isn’t it? We’re living in a time when people have more than they have ever had; with the best healthcare, education, disposable income etc. etc. and yet people still aren’t happy?’

‘People will always find something to complain about, or get angry about,’ said Oliver, a shadow crossing his face. Elio could tell that he was thinking about the legal proceedings that he had just received.

‘It’ll be okay,’ he said, ‘We’ll fight it, every step of the way.’

‘Yeah, but Naomi’s gone home with them now. Regardless of what decision she actually makes in the end; what if she doesn’t come back? What if they don’t let her?’ said Oliver.

‘We’ll fight,’ said Elio, ‘That’s all I can offer at the moment. I don’t really know what else to say.’

‘I know,’ said Oliver, ‘I’m sorry. I’m just feeling a bit hopeless.’

‘Is this about Naomi’s parents?’ asked Rory, tentatively, ‘Sorry if it’s none of my business.’

‘No, it’s fine,’ said Oliver with a shrug and glance cast in Elio’s direction, ‘I figured you’d probably know anywhere.’

Elio blushed a little, but figured that it wasn’t as if he had been sworn to silence, either by Oliver or by his parents.

‘But yeah, they served me with legal proceedings this morning,’ said Oliver, ‘Or rather, their lawyer did. So now I’ve got to find my own lawyer; and with my current lack of funds, I don’t quite know what I’m going to do on that front.’

‘But your dad..?’ said Elio.

‘Said he’d help me with the rent so I didn’t lose the flat; I doubt he’s going to be able sneak much more under the nose of my mom, until he manages to change her mind. _If_ he manages to change her mind, rather,’ said Oliver.

Rory was frowning at them both, ‘I don’t want to get your hopes up for something that might not happen, but… I could ask Rachel?’

‘Rachel?’ asked Oliver.

‘Your aunt,’ breathed Elio, ‘Of course, why did I not think to ask before?’

‘I’d have been amazed if you’d remembered!’ said Rory with a grin, ‘But in all seriousness, I can ask her. It’s a bit of a long shot. But it might be worth a try?’

‘Do you think she’ll be able to take the case?’ asked Oliver, sounding hopeful for the first time that morning.

‘I genuinely don’t know,’ said Rory, holding up her hands, ‘I know that her firm has offices in New York, but it’ll depend on her work schedule, and what else she has going on at the moment. She might want to come and meet you first.’

‘That’ll be fine,’ said Oliver.

‘Tell you what,’ said Rory, ‘I could ask her when she arrives this afternoon, and if she doesn’t immediately shoot down the idea, I’ll forgo my shopping trip to Bloomingdales where we were going to go before our flight, and we can swing by the hospital?’

‘That would be amazing, Rory,’ said Elio, ‘But don’t beat yourself up if it doesn’t come to anything.’

‘I know, I know,’ said Rory, ‘But it’s worth an ask, right?’

‘Definitely,’ said Elio, taking her hand and giving it a squeeze, ‘Thanks Rory.’

‘I’ve not done anything yet!’ she giggled, ‘It’s just an idea.’

Oliver smiled at her, ‘Yeah, but a damn good one. And it’s made me feel a lot better about everything.’

‘Glad I could help,’ Rory said with a small smile.

**

That afternoon, Elio was lying next to Oliver on his gurney. He’d come back after having lunch with his parents and after Oliver had had his appointment with his surgical consult at two. Apparently, they’d told him that his stitches would be good take out within the next few days as the wounds were healing up well, and after that had happened, there was no reason why he couldn’t recover at home, as long as he promised not to undertake any extreme activities. Elio wondered whether gentle sex and the occasional blow job came under the heading of “extreme activity”. He decided that it probably wouldn’t be a good idea to ask the surgeon that one.

Elio was lying on his side, reading _The Heptameron_ by Marguerite of Navarre, whilst Oliver was reading a Dickens novel. His hand was lying on Elio’s shoulder and they were bathed in companionable silence, other than the occasional turn of the page, and the general hub-bub of the hospital outside of the door to Oliver’s room.

Elio shifted slightly as he heard Oliver shut his book, and he looked up at him.

‘So, do you know the answer yet?’ asked Oliver, looking down at him and what he was reading.

‘To what?’ asked Elio.

‘Is it better to speak or to die?’ asked Oliver, a small smile playing on his lips.

Elio smiled, a warmly smile, before sitting up and kissing Oliver deeply, being careful not to lean on him to heavily, which he knew could hurt them both.

‘Shall I simply say what Florida tells Amadour?’ asked Elio, as he broke the kiss, ‘That I shall always counsel my friends to speak and not to die. There are few words that cannot be mended, but life once lost can never be regained.’

Oliver looked stunned, ‘You’ve memorised that?’

Elio kissed him again, enjoying the delicious taste and wonderful feeling that was simply _Oliver_ , before he spoke, his mouth very close to Oliver’s, ‘It’s my favourite part of the book.’

Oliver chuckled softly, ‘Mine too.’

Elio pecked him once more, ‘But for myself I think the answer I would give is that it is better to speak, to shout, to yell out if you love someone, and you’re not sure if they know. The other option is to remain silent… and in agony.’

Oliver smiled a little sadly, ‘Thank fuck we both learned to speak then.’

‘Quite,’ said Elio, resting his head on Oliver’s shoulder, curling his fingers in between those of the larger man.

They stayed like that for some time, and Elio could feel himself drifting off to sleep, but he was roused to wakefulness by a knock at the door.

‘Rory?’ Oliver asked him, looking down.

‘Could be,’ said Elio yawning, and swinging his legs off the bed to go and answer the door. He opened it to see Rory standing there with what appeared to be an older version of herself. Elio’s eyes widened at the similarity.

‘Yeah yeah,’ said Rory, ‘Get it out of your system. I know, I got my dad’s genes through and through.’

The older version of Rory laughed and extended her hand, ‘I’m Rachel, Rory’s aunt. You must be Elio? She’s told me a lot about you.’

‘Rachel!’ hissed Rory, flushing pink. Elio shrugged and opened the door so they could both come in.

‘Hello,’ said Rachel approaching Oliver with a wave, ‘Rory said I should I come and meet you,’

‘Thank you for coming,’ said Oliver, slowly sitting up and moving his legs over the side of the bed to face them.

‘How much have you told Rachel?’ asked Elio of Rory.

‘Not a lot,’ said Rory, ‘Other than the basics.’

‘Alright then,’ said Rachel, sitting on one of the chairs against the wall, ‘I guess you need to fill me in.’

Oliver glanced at Elio, trying to figure out which one of them would start. Elio shrugged, and gestured to him, suggesting that as it was his need for the lawyer, he could be the one to speak. As he began, Elio found himself hoping against hope that this would work. He knew that it was, of course, hugely important to Oliver to know that he would be able to see his child if Naomi decided to stay in the US. He honestly didn’t know what she would choose, but realised it was going to take more than a walk and a ten-minute conversation in order to make that decision.


	29. Snow Melt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everyone who's been so engaged with this story. I promised a happy ending and we're certainly on the way there. I hope you've enjoyed reading this story as much as I've enjoyed writing it. Epilogue to come! :D

‘Oh Jesus it’s cold out there,’ said Oliver, his teeth chattering over the word ‘cold’. He shut the door behind Elio as they both piled into the apartment, wrapped in coats, gloves and scarves against the freezing New York January. It had snowed last week, but that had melted somewhat to sludge on the edges of the street, dripping into the grates and drains below. Due to the heat of the pipes running under the roads, and the cars themselves, this almost meant that parts of the road gave off a weird steam as the snow melted and then condensed in the frigid air.  

‘Tea?’ asked Elio, as he peeled his gloves off his cold hands and put them in the pocket of his coat before hanging his coat up.

‘Please’ said Oliver doing the same as he looked about, ‘Naomi?!’

No answer came from either the bathroom, or the closed bedroom door in the flat.

‘Nai?’ asked Oliver again, going to the bathroom door and asking through it, in case she hadn’t heard. No answer again.

‘Where she’s got to?’ asked Oliver, more to himself as Elio walking into the kitchen. Elio could see the worry beginning to grow on his face, when he spotted a note pinned on the fridge.

‘She’s gone out,’ said Elio in answer, and then held up the note he’d found, before reading it aloud; ‘”Oliver (and Elio if you’re there), gone to meet Rachel for (decaf) coffee, she wanted to talk about my case before she met with my parents lawyers later – I did tell you this a few days ago – but you probably forgot. See you later, Nai.”’

Oliver’s face relaxed after Elio read the note, ‘Oh yeah, I do remember her telling me now.’

‘Do you know what’s it about?’ asked Elio as the water boiled and he found two mugs in the cupboard, and put the tea in them.

‘I think it was whether Naomi has any claim to her trust fund now that her parents have cut her off,’ said Oliver.

‘Is there any hope on that front?’ said Elio, as he poured the water on top of the tea.

‘Maybe, but I don’t know the legal ins and outs of it,’ said Oliver with a shrug, ‘From what I can remember, some of the money was given to her by her grandfather. So technically it never belonged to her parents at all. I think her and Rachel were going to figure out whether they could separate that money from the main fund which her parents have withdrawn access to.’

‘I still can’t believe they actually did that,’ said Elio as he passed Oliver a mug of the tea. It felt delightful to hold the other mug between his hands, allowing the heat to thaw his fingers.

Oliver walked over to the sofa and shoved the duvet off the surface. He’d clearly neglected to fold it this morning after getting up. The pillow was also on the floor. Elio joined him on the couch and put his socked feet on the coffee table, taking a deep drink of his tea.

‘I think it was a real slap in the face when she decided to leave,’ said Oliver, ‘They didn’t actually expect her to do it.’

Elio smiled, ‘That was pretty brave of her.’

He remembered the night that Naomi had turned up on the doorstep. It was a few days after Christmas, Oliver had been out of hospital for a couple of weeks, and his parents had flown home the day before. He and Oliver had just had dinner when the bell had rung. He’d opened the door to see Naomi, dripping wet in the corridor, and looking particularly bedraggled on the doorstep.

‘Naomi?!’ Oliver had said seeing who it was, bringing her into the apartment and immediately beginning to see to her; dry clothes and a hot cup of tea. Naomi had simply sat there, looking slightly shell-shocked as Oliver had done his best to make her comfortable.

She’d explained as she’d dried and thawed out, that she’d told her parents she was leaving. That she didn’t agree with what they were trying to do, and that she wanted no part of it. What had ensued was the worst argument she could ever remember, with her mother ending it by screaming that she didn’t have a daughter, and that there would certainly be no money to help her. As she had still left she had been effectively homeless. She’d had enough money in her pocket to catch a train to the city, and had made her way to Oliver’s apartment in the pouring rain. She’d left the house with a small bag of clothes, and unless her parents relented at some point, that was all she had to her name.

That was the point she’d broken down crying, and Oliver had rushed to comfort her. Elio had remembered watching, somewhat awkwardly, from the miniature kitchen. He remembered that he could see their friendship personified in front of his eyes that night, as Oliver had immediately told Naomi that she was staying with him; that she could have his room and that he would take the sofa. He hadn’t let her protests sway him; of course. He’d held her as she’d cried, but there had been nothing but platonic comfort there, and Elio remembered not feeling even the slightest twinge of jealousy as Oliver had held his friend until she cried herself to the point of exhaustion. Then he’d helped her to bed, where she’d slept for nigh on twenty-four hours, her body taken past the point of exhaustion from the events of the day.

That had been about two and a half weeks ago, and after that Naomi had swiftly gone about seeing if she could get any access to her money, and whether the fact that she had left had any impact on the suit that her parents were currently pressing against Oliver. What had followed was many meetings with lawyers, Elio’s parents, Oliver’s dad (who had told his wife that he was going to the city on business), and either Oliver or Naomi. Elio had felt like something of a spare part, and had tried to be as useful as possible whilst this hive of activity had been going on. He’d tried to be there for whoever needed him, in whatever way that he could.

Of course, both of them were still healing in the aftermath of their attack and prolonged hospital stay, especially Oliver. The bruising had eventually totally faded, but the break in Elio’s wrist was still healing, as – of course – were the wounds that Oliver carried. They’d healed over, but the scar tissue was still raw and often sore. Both of them still suffered from the odd aches and pains, but it was nothing that a few painkillers couldn’t sort out.

This morning they’d met in central park, and had a brisk walk in the weak winter sunshine. Both their outpatient doctors had said that gentle exercise was good for their continued rehabilitation, so they’d tried to take that advice as much as they could. Oliver wanted to go back to work as soon as was possible, despite the fact that he did get some modicum of sick pay whilst he wasn’t working. They’d walked for a good forty-five minutes, before deciding that it was just too cold to keep going, and had returned to Oliver’s flat to thaw out.

‘I’m going to go take a shower,’ said Oliver, putting his empty mug on the coffee table, next to Elio’s feet, ‘Warm up properly.’

‘Alone?’ said Elio, twisting around as he got up to watch Oliver walk towards the small bathroom.

‘Huh?’ asked Oliver, turning around to look at him.

‘Well Naomi’s not here…’ said Elio trailing off with a grin on his face. Over the past few weeks, since Oliver had felt well enough to even attempt having sex again, they’d been reduced to few and far between, either in Elio’s single bed in student halls, trying not to fall out, or a quickie in some corner or other. For two twenty something males, this was basically torture.

A grin spread across Oliver’s face as he realised what Elio was suggesting, ‘There’s not a lot of space in the shower.’

‘I think we’ll manage,’ said Elio with a smirk, putting his mug down next to Oliver and getting up, his hands open by his sides in a gesture of “well”? Oliver nodded towards his arm, and the cast that was still sitting there. Elio looked it and made a face.

‘Give me ten seconds,’ he said, and walked to the kitchen. He found a role of a cling film in Oliver’s draw, and proceeded to wrap it carefully around his cast, making sure that it wouldn’t get too wet when he took a shower. It was a pain in the proverbial backside, but there wasn’t a lot he could do about that. He was getting it off next week.

He walked back around the kitchen counter and then leant against, a small teasing smile playing on his lips, daring Oliver to come and kiss him.

The next moment Oliver had walked up to him and crashed his mouth down on Elio’s upturned one. There was no necessity to be quick or quiet right now, so they both revelled in simply having their hands on the other, shedding clothes to reveal skin that had changed in the past month or so. Before this episode, Elio hadn’t realised that bruises could scar, but despite the fact that the colours had faded from his alabaster skin, there were marks still there, beneath the surface, the made it look slightly darker, or lighter, depending on where they were.

He reached behind himself blindly to find the door handle to bathroom, as Oliver pressed him against the door, completely crowding the space in front of his body and filling his entire vision, his hands making fast work of Elio’s jeans, before just managing to hold them both up as the door opened and they tumbled inside. The door slammed behind them.

They were both desperate for each other; it had been four days since they’d last got each other naked, and then it had been a silent quickie in Elio’s bed whilst Zoe had meandered around the flat outside. Not exactly conducive to passion. The last time they had really taken their time with each other had been before the attack; so almost two months previously.

Somehow Oliver managed to start the shower, and get it to a reasonable temperature, whilst still kissing Elio, so that when they both got in, it was like warm rain against their still cold skin. Elio shuddered in delight at the feeling, and also the fact that Oliver’s hand was wrapped around his cock, slowly sliding up and down, making his knees shake slightly, and his head to fall back against the shower wall.

He gasped when Oliver turned him around, pressing him up against the glass, and got to his knees behind him. Elio let out a deep groan as Oliver began to prepare him with his tongue and careful fingers, the warm water from the shower running down over his back, and surely into Oliver’s eyes. Oliver’s mouth on him was making him moan into the glass and his forearm as two fingers broached his body, and crooked upwards in search of his prostate. The fact that Oliver had to physically hold him up, and stop his knees from giving way, was good indication to the kneeling man that he’d found it a few seconds later. A moment later Elio reached behind himself and tried to pull Oliver up; he was too impatient to wait anymore. Oliver nipped him playful on the side of the neck at his impatience, and had chuckled in his ear.

‘You ready?’ asked Oliver. Elio hadn’t answered verbally, just nodded, and reached for Oliver’s hip. He could feel his hard length pressed against his lower back, and ground himself back, just so Oliver could know exactly how ready he was. He felt Oliver bend his knees slightly, and the next second his cock was nudging against Elio’s hole, and sliding deep inside of him in one smooth stroke, not stopping until he was completely seated inside of him, his chest pressed firmly to Elio’s back.

Elio gasped, his forehead falling forward against the cool glass of the shower at the sensation. He put his foot up on the edge of the shower, to give himself a little bit more leverage to rock back, but in the position Oliver had to do most of the work, as he started to rock into Elio’s willing body, holding him by the hip and around the waist as he did so.

‘Uh, please, Oliver,’ Elio murmured, probably drowned out by the sound of the water, as Oliver’s cock nudged at his prostate on each pass, making pleasure shoot through his body.

‘You like that?’ whispered Oliver in his ear, ‘My cock pounding inside of you?’

‘ _Uhhhh_ ,’ muttered Elio, his head falling back against Oliver’s shoulder.

‘Say it,’ whispered Oliver, pounding into him harder, turning Elio’s brain to mush at the feeling of Oliver’s hot, naked cock inside of his body. He still wasn’t used to the fact that they didn’t have to use condoms, and it felt _ridiculous_.

‘ _Ahhhhh, please_ ,’ whimpered Elio.

‘Say it,’ growled Oliver in his ear, gripping his hip.

‘ _Please, yes, I love it_ ,’ hissed Elio, as he tilted his head back, searching for Oliver’s mouth. The next moment, Oliver’s lips were on his in a searing kiss, almost bruising his mouth in its intensity.

‘ _Say it_ ,’ Oliver growled against his mouth.

‘ _Ahh, yes, I love your cock inside me! Please, please, fuck me!’_ Elio practically sobbed as Oliver pounded into his body, stroking his cock in time with his thrusts.

‘Are you gonna cum?’

‘Yes. _Yes_ …’ whined Elio.

The next second his body went completely boneless as he came, his release causing his body to ripple around Oliver’s cock, and him to come a few seconds later deep into Elio’s body, crowding him against the shower wall as his body also shook with the intensity of his release. It was probably only due to the shower’s small size that they both managed to stay standing.

After they had both got their breath back, they proceeded to actually shower. Elio loved it when Oliver washed his hair, the feeling of his fingers rubbing his scalp. His scalp had always been one of his erogenous zones, and the feeling of Oliver massaging his skin almost got him hard again. It would have done if he hadn’t cum only a handful of minutes before. He traced his fingers across Oliver’s body, across the pink twisted skin of the scars on his lower belly. Oliver made a noise of disgust as he looked down at them, where they crossed the line of muscle on his abs. Elio looked up at his face before gently sinking to his knees and kissing the scar tissue, and the skin around them. He looked up at Oliver’s face where he was looking down at him, his breathing slow and careful as he watched Elio’s mouth make love to his scars. There was nothing sexual about this; it was just about him letting Oliver know that he loved him, regardless of any scars that he bore.

Once they’d both got out of the shower, dried off, and got dressed (Elio wearing one of Oliver’s jumpers that had shrunk in the wash).

‘Are we going to meet with Rachel then?’ Elio asked, when they’d sorted themselves out.

‘Well I was,’ said Oliver, ‘Do you want to come to?’

‘I was going to,’ said Elio with a shrug, ‘Unless you didn’t want me to?’

‘No, of course you can,’ said Oliver, ‘I just wondered if you had somewhere else to be?’

Elio shrugged, ‘Classes haven’t yet started, and I’m not meeting Rory until tomorrow.’

‘Great,’ said Oliver with a genuine smile, and kissed him softly, ‘Come on then, otherwise we’ll be late.’

**

They were on their second cup of coffee in Rachel’s office complex when she arrived, her assistant hurrying along behind her. She blew into the office like a tornado, with a broad grin on her face. She dropped a bundle of tied up papers on the desk in front of them.

‘What’s got you so happy?’ said Oliver, as she sat down, taking her jacket off as she did so.

She nodded towards the papers, but before Oliver even had the chance to read the first line, she’d burst out; ‘They’ve capitulated!’

Oliver looked up at her and breathed out, ‘What?’

‘Well, as you know, I’ve met with their lawyers several times, and to be honest it’s amazed me they agreed to take the case. They didn’t really have a leg to stand on once Naomi had made her choice. It took them several weeks to talk their clients around, but they have dropped their civil suit against you Professor Davis, on the proviso that no counter suit for damages will be filed,’ said Naomi.

Elio looked across at Oliver, a look of amazement on his face, which he saw mirrored back on Oliver’s features. He knew that they’d both been expecting a long hard slog through the courts, knowing how tenacious Naomi’s parents could be. It seemed that Naomi’s leaving had taken the wind out of their sails completely. For the briefest of moments Elio felt a pang of sympathy for them. Then he remembered that this was all self-inflicted from their dogmatic views and could have been averted if they’d have been prepared to talk before becoming overtly aggressive, and any sympathy he had faded away.

‘That’s… amazing,’ said Oliver, his voice still slightly hoarse from disbelief.

‘I know,’ said Rachel, ‘I honestly wasn’t expecting it. I was anticipating that we might be able to make some form of a deal before it got to court, but I wasn’t expecting a full capitulation and dropping of the suit.’

‘You must have said something right,’ said Oliver.

Rachel spread her hands in surprise, ‘Well that’s not my job, but I think it was really Naomi’s departure that took the wind out of their sails.’

‘Hmmm,’ said Oliver, and Elio watched as the same flash of pity he’d just experienced also crossed Oliver’s features.

‘So, what now?’ said Elio.

‘Now, not a lot,’ said Rachel, ‘I need a couple of signatures from you agreeing not to counter-sue, and then I will wrap up the paperwork with their lawyers. The only other stipulation is that you make no attempt to contact them in the future.’

‘Yeah, like I’d want to do that,’ said Oliver, with a derisive tone in his voice.

‘I also assured their lawyers that that would probably be your stance,’ said Rachel with a grin.

‘Okay, well where do I sign then?’ asked Oliver, turning the papers towards him once again.

‘It’ll just need to be-’

‘Professor Davis? Sorry to interrupt Rachel, but I’ve got St Catherine’s Hospital on the phone,’ an aide said as she rushed into the officer.

‘What’s the matter?’ asked Oliver, looking around.

‘It’s your wife Professor, she’s gone into labour, and apparently it’s progressing fast,’ said the aide.

Oliver glanced once at Rachel, and then at Elio.

‘I’ll send the papers to you next week some time,’ said Rachel, ‘Don’t worry about it; go and be with your family.’

Oliver stood up, and held out his hand to Elio, who took it.

‘Where did you say she was?’ Oliver asked the woman still holding the phone.

‘St Catherine’s,’ she said, ‘Would you like me to order you a cab?’

‘No, it’s fine,’ said Oliver, ‘We’ll get one on the street.’

They both hurried out of the office and into the elevator. Elio could see that Oliver was terrified, nervous, and excited all at the same time. He squeezed his hand as the elevator started moving down through the floors, and the blond man looked across at him. He smiled broadly, and squeezed back, not letting go as the elevator reached the bottom floor, and they hurried out onto the street.


	30. Monet's Berm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it guys, the last chapter. 
> 
> I promised a happy ending, so here we go. Of course we had to have a bit of smut and fluff to see this one out! Sorry if you wanted something a little more gritty, but I thought we could all use a little light at the moment, and I feel these boys deserve a little happiness after everything I've put them through! 
> 
> Hope you love it, and that I've done this story justice! 
> 
> xxx

Epilogue

Four Years, Six Months, and 23 days later

It was so completely peaceful here. That was why Elio loved it. He’d loved it when he was a child, when he’d sneak off here on his bike with a rucksack full of books, and spend the day either lying in the grass beside the cool water, or under a tree out of the glare of the sun. He’d stay here for hours, just reading, and taking in the utter stillness of the place. He’d never brought any of his friends here, not Marzia, or Vimini, or his parents. This had been his place; his place to come when he wanted to get away from everybody and everything. His place to think, and to be totally free.

He’d only ever shared it with one other person, one still balmy day several summers ago.

So, he supposed as he hopped off his bike and left it tossed carelessly on the ground, perhaps this wasn’t his place after all. It was _their_ place.

They’d been back here several times since that day that changed so many things. But today was different, today they were here especially early. Today was going to be a day full of people, and noise, and joy, and laughter. So, they had come away, sneaking away from their shared bed in the early hours of the morning, to be here just as the morning sun was warming the ground, so they could enjoy the quiet and each other, before the day took over them both.

He didn’t look back at his companion as he made his way down the bank to the side of the clean and cool water. He knew he was following him. Instead, he waded across, a gasp crossing his lips at the intense coldness of the water as he headed for the sun dappled grass on the opposite bank. Here he turned, letting the sun begin to dry the skin of his legs where the water had splashed him as he crossed the water. He looked up at the mountains, where the water that pooled here had started its journey, the slopes and peaks giving way to the verdant lushness of this countryside in early summer, before the sun browned the plants and grass with its intensity. He flicked his eyes to the opposite bank.

Oliver was still on the other side of the water, propping his bike up against his tree, very dissimilar to what he used to do some years ago, when he would just chuck it on the floor in the same manner that Elio had done. Maybe Oliver had become more sensible as he aged somewhat. Elio stood, turning his face up towards the warmth of the sun, letting it soak into his skin, whilst waiting for Oliver to cross the water and join him. He heard him stop, and opened his eyes momentarily, to see Oliver washing his face with the crystal clear water. He smiled as he vaguely remembered him doing much the same thing when they had come here the very first time, after an exclamation as to how cold the water was. Now it didn’t seem to bother him overly much.

Oliver joined him on the bank and took his hand. They didn’t speak as they simply laid down upon the grass and let the morning summer sun warm their bodies as it climbed through the azure sky. There legs were tangled together, and Elio could feel the soft hairs that grew thicker on Oliver’s brushing against his own. He rubbed his bare foot (he’d kicked off his shoes when he’d laid down) against Oliver’s calf, feeling him react sleepily to the touch. It was warm, and they dozed together in the peace and serenity of the place and of each other. They were quiet until Elio rolled onto his stomach and looked down at where Oliver was half-sleeping in the sunlight, his eyes closed and face relaxed.  

‘Mmm?’ asked Oliver, feeling that he was no longer lying peacefully by his side.

‘I love this Oliver,’ said Elio, a grin playing on his face. He knew that Oliver would remember. It was almost a ritual that they had when they came here; sort of like a memory of all the things that had passed, and all the things that were yet to come.

Oliver opened his eyes, that ridiculously bright colour blue shining forth, and he smiled, ‘Good… I love it too.’

Elio would never get bored of looking at Oliver. He’d decided this years ago. He loved looking into his eyes, and he swore, depending on the time of day, that they changed colour in the light. Sometimes in the evenings and in the very early morning, Elio would have banked money that they had very dark blue, almost indigo streaks, across the irises. These seemed to fade as the light grew stronger and they turned practically cobalt in their appearance. Oliver was holding his gaze, as he examined the face that he’d explored a hundred times before. It didn’t matter, they were content to lie here, knowing that they would progress or leave whenever they were ready.

The sultry breeze made the leaves rustle noisily on their branches for a moment.

As if the noise had stirred him into action, Elio reached up, and began to unbutton Oliver’s shirt. This was another thing that was normal when they came here. Because this was _their_ place, and no one else’s. Because this was where it had all began, they always always made love when they came here. They both knew that if they headed to this place, then it would happen in one way or another. It was their shared space, and it was another part of the ritual that they undertook whenever they came to this natural altar.

Elio kissed each inch of exposed skin as it came into view, pushing the shirt aside as he slowly popped open the buttons. Oliver just smiled lazily down at him and let him continue, until the shirt was fully open, exposing his chest and lean stomach, and the sexy ‘v’ of Oliver’s hips. The scars from the knife attack all those years ago had faded to white lines, edged with the faintest tinge of pink where the skin had stretched and twisted as they’d healed. They would never fade, and Oliver would bear them until the day he died. It didn’t matter now, he didn’t mind them. Elio had constantly told him that they weren’t anything to be ashamed of when they were healing, and Oliver had come to accept that they were to be a permanent part of his body. He’d thought them ugly; Elio had taught him otherwise.

Elio continued in his mission to kiss all over Oliver’s chest, before working his way down to the waistband of Oliver’s shorts. He grinned up at him as he unbuttoned them and slid his hand inside, feeling Oliver’s cock stir under his fingers as he began slowly stroking the hardening length which was quickly taking interest in the proceedings. Oliver sighed in utter contentment as Elio stroked, using the precome that was leaking steadily from the tip to slick the way. He watched Oliver’s face as he did this, his eyes fluttering closed at the slow deliciousness began to build in his bones as Elio continued to stroke, the skin hot and silky under his palm.

‘Mmmm…’ groaned out Oliver, his hips gently rocking in time with Elio’s motions. Elio used his other hand to fully open Oliver’s shorts, and tug them down his thighs somewhat, the older man wriggling slightly to make this easier. Elio had no intention of letting Oliver cum yet, he just wanted to watch his lover as his hand created the wonderful warmth throughout his body, letting pleasure slowly suffuse through his skin.  

It was when Oliver’s mouth parted slightly, his pink lips edging out a gorgeous pant of desire that Elio leaned down and took him into his mouth, causing the older man to tense his abs and his eyes to fly open as he gasped in delight. Elio smiled around Oliver’s cock, using his tongue around the head and the slit, concentrating on the sensitive nerves just on the underside of the head, that made Oliver’s eyes roll back. Elio flattened his tongue and concentrated momentarily here, before he slowly began to inch his way down Oliver’s prick, until his nose was touching the other man’s pubic bone and the soft curls there. Elio relaxed his throat, having little problem taking all of Oliver into his mouth as he began to slowly move (he’d had a lot of practice at taking all of Oliver).

‘Ahhh, yeah,’ moaned Oliver, his hand wrapping in Elio’s hair as he bobbed his head up and down, his mouth slicking the soft skin with the most sinful noise as he sucked at Oliver’s cock. Elio grinned around him as he began to hum, causing delicious vibrations to reverb around Oliver’s prick, knowing the sensation would drive him crazy. He had to put his hands on Oliver’s hips to stop him thrusting up into his mouth. Whilst he did allow Oliver to fuck his mouth, right now he wanted to be the one in control, delivering the pleasure he wanted to give to his lover, in the way that he chose.

‘Oh _god_ , yeah,’ breathed Oliver, as Elio alternated sucking on the tip of his cock before deepthroating him, enjoying the feeling of Oliver’s cock hitting the back of his throat. He enjoyed feeling the tightening of his muscles under Oliver’s skin and the undulations of his breath as the pleasure wound its way around his body.

‘Uh, Elio, stop, otherwise I’m going to cum,’ Oliver stuttered out, his hands tightening in Elio’s hair, his abs tense under Elio’s wandering hands.

Elio pulled off, looking down at Oliver, ‘Sure?’

‘Mmmmm,’ said Oliver, his eyes blown and practically glittering with lust, ‘I want to fuck you.’

‘Oh yeah?’ said Elio, slowly stroking Oliver’s cock, not enough to make him cum, but just enough to keep on a delicious peak of pleasure.

‘Mmmm,’ growled Oliver, ‘I want to cum inside you, and make you cry out your pleasure as I make you cum on just my cock.’

Elio panted, his mouth falling open at just Oliver’s words, ‘Promises, promise-’

He couldn’t finish his comment as the next second he let out a delighted laugh as Oliver reached up and turned them over, so that Elio was flat on his back, and Oliver was hovering above him, his hardness pressed against Elio’s thigh. Elio grinned and captured his mouth in his kiss that was deep, gorgeous, and full of the passion that both of them felt. Oliver made quick work of Elio’s clothes, chucking them onto a pile in the grass beside them. His hands drifted down Elio’s sides and worked to the inside of his thighs.

Oliver stopped as his hands spread Elio’s thighs, encouraging him to bend his knees towards his chest, and hold onto his legs. Oliver looked down and a deep groan rumbled in his chest as he looked at his lover, exposed to his eyes in front of him. Elio grinned as Oliver met his gaze, his hands slowly travelling between his legs, bypassing his cock, and to his hole.

‘Oh yeah?’ said Oliver his fingertip trailing around Elio’s hole, where the base of a butt plug was nestled. Elio shivered at the delicious sensation of Oliver’s touch on his most sensitive skin.

Elio bit his lip, a sly grin crossing his face. He’d obviously done it on purpose; knowing that they were coming here today, and he’d wanted to surprise Oliver. So, he’d snuck out of bed just before they’d woken and prepared himself, using the plug to keep himself ready for his lover. He described this to Oliver, watching as the blond man’s mouth fell open and he panted out his lust and desire, his cock slowly rocking against Elio’s naked thigh.

‘How on earth did you ride a bike?’ hissed Oliver, making Elio gasp as he tugged on the plug, pushing it backwards and forwards a little, rocking it against his prostate. Elio knew that Oliver didn’t really want an answer to this question, further confirmed when he began fucking him with the toy, making Elio grip his knees even tighter and for his eyes to screw tight shut with the pleasure.

‘ _Oliver…’_ Elio hissed, feeling the the plug rock inside of him, and Oliver’s heavy prick against his thigh. The next moment Oliver had gently removed the plug from inside of his body, and nudged his cock just inside Elio’s hole.

‘ _Please_ ,’ Elio whined, trying to rock his hips down on to Oliver’s cock. Oliver leaned down, his body seated between Elio’s thighs, and captured his mouth in a deep kiss as he pushed deep into his willing body, until he was fully inside. Oliver gasped at the sensation; the hot naked flesh against hot naked flesh, and his forehead rested against Elio’s as he began to rock, trying to maintain his composure. Both of them knew each other’s body so well that they knew exactly what they loved and how to pleasure each other totally. Elio wasn’t in the mood for gentle sex today, and he pressed his heels into Oliver’s butt whilst clenching down on him at the same time to let him know.

‘Harder…’ he pleaded, ‘Please…’

‘Harder?’ Oliver asked, giving one hard thrust so that their skin smacked together on the impact, ‘You want me to fuck you hard?’

‘Yes,’ Elio gasped as he did it again, ‘Please fuck me!’

Oliver moved Elio’s legs from around his waist in order to put them over his shoulders so he was bent practically in half, adjusting his angle so that he was pounding against Elio’s prostate on each thrust, making him see stars and gasp out his pleasure to the sultry morning air.  Elio gripped Oliver around his neck, trying to bring him as close as possible, his face screwed up in delight and pleasure, his eyes closed as he mewled in joy.

‘ _Fuck…_ ’ Oliver hissed as Elio clenched and rocked against Oliver’s deep thrusts, ‘Oh god, Elio, you feel amazing.’

‘ _Uhhh,’_ was the only vocalisation Elio was capable of making as the pleasure screwed up deep in the pit of his stomach. His cock was trapped between their bodies and was rubbing against Oliver’s hot skin as he thrust deeply into his body. The sound of their bodies meeting each other was echoing across the water, but neither of them cared as they sought to draw the other completely into themselves, to become as one as they could be. Elio was biting his lip to stop himself from crying out too loudly, but he failed as Oliver leaned down and sucked at his neck, probably raising a bruise that everyone would know where it had come from.

‘ _Ollliver… ahhh, going to cum_ ,’ Elio muttered, and tried to reach for his cock to stroke himself to completion.

Oliver batted his hand away and growled down at him, ‘No, I said you were going to cum on my cock.’

The dominance in Oliver’s voice made Elio’s brain short circuit as all of his pleasure was focused on his hole, and the rub of his cock against the taut stomach of his lover. Elio’s body rippled in sheer delight around Oliver’s cock, causing him his own shocks of pleasure. They were both approached precipice of pleasure together, racing towards the finish line. Their gasps of pleasure and groans rent the still air as Oliver’s instinct completely took over and he thrust hard, once, twice, and three times into Elio’s shaking body, his release pouring into the brunette as his own body went taut as a bowstring and he came in between them, his cock untouched.

A few moments later, Oliver fell to the side, withdrawing from Elio’s body, his hand on his chest as his breathing calmed back down to normal.

‘Oh god,’ breathed Elio, his eyes still closed, ‘That was amazing…’

Oliver didn’t answer, his just rolled up onto his side, so their bodies were touching, their heated skin slick together in the sun, as they just lay together in their special place, feeling as together as it was possible to be.

**

His bike clattered as he leant up against the wall, where it properly slid down with a scrape and fell with a crash to the floor. He didn’t bother picking it up.

‘Elio! Is that you?’

‘ _Si mama!_ ’ Elio called as he ducked through the small door in the garden wall from the country lane. His mother’s voice carried all the way down the garden from the kitchen window which she had assumedly called from. She must have heard his bike.

‘Come on, the food is nearly ready!’

Elio took Oliver’s hand as they walked across the garden towards the sprawling country house; it’s façade covered in green as the plants that grew up the side of the walls burst forth into leaf. They rounded the corner towards where the huge dining table would be laid out, soon to be groaning with food and drink. The table was laid for sixteen, with mismatched chairs drawn up to it in a haphazard way. Elio could see their guests were grouped all over the garden in various places, drinks in hand, chatting and laughing with each other.

‘Daddy!!’

A high-pitched voice yelled out in utter joy as they approached, giggling with delight.

‘Hey sweetheart! Hi Kat!’ said Oliver, falling to his knees in the grass beside Elio and scooping up the bundle of joy that had just come sprinting across the grass as fast as their little legs could carry them.

‘How’s my girl today?’ Oliver asked, hoiking the child up in his arms and onto his strong shoulders, ‘What have you been doing?’

‘I’ve been playing pirates with Marzia!’

‘Really?’ said Oliver, his voice full of enthusiasm, ‘Who was the pirate?’

‘We both were daddy!’ said the little girl, ‘We found lots of buried treasure!’

‘Did you?’ said Oliver, ‘Where?’

‘At the bottom of the garden!’ she said, ‘Nelly gave us a map to follow!’

Elio smiled indulgently, watching the pair of them. ‘Nelly’ was Katherine’s name for his mother, and he knew that she had devised some form of treasure hunt for the little girl, knowing that they would be coming to visit today.

‘What was the treasure?’ asked Oliver, as he stopped by the table.

‘Chocolate!’ said Kat, and the squealed with delight as Oliver swung her down from his shoulders, and momentarily held her upside down before turning her the right way up with an “oops!” as if he hadn’t meant to do it.

‘Oh, I hope you left some for me,’ said Oliver, putting the child down in her designated chair. 

‘Of course I did daddy,’ said Kat her face creased in concern, ‘It’s your birthday!’

‘Thank you very much sweetheart,’ said Oliver, kissing her gently on the forehead, to which she beamed out her delight.

Elio watched the interaction, a smile on his own face. His chair was at the end of the table, next to Oliver’s and to Marzia, who had just sat down.

‘Elio! Can you come and help me with the plates?’

His mother called once again from the kitchen.

‘Of course mama!’ he called back, before turning to Oliver, ‘What would you like to drink?’

‘Red?’ said Oliver, ‘Do you want me to come and get it? Or help out?’

‘I’ll do it,’ said Elio, ‘It’s your birthday; you stay here with Kat.’

Oliver was only too happy to do so, and he sat down in the chair next to his daughter, whilst she regaled him with tales of her treasure hunt. The other guests soon realised that it was time for food as plate after plate began to appear from the kitchen.

Over the following hours as the afternoon turned to evening, the table was covered and then cleared of many of Annella’s and Mafalda’s sumptuous dished, as they all celebrated Oliver’s thirtieth birthday. Elio sat, with his hand resting on Oliver’s thigh, thinking that he wouldn’t have it any other way. It was truly the best way in which they could have marked this day. Everyone was here; Marzia and her boyfriend, sat just down from Elio, Annella and Samuel (of course), Mafalda – looking slightly lost with Anchise who had died the previous year much to everyone’s sadness; he’d only been fifty-eight -, Naomi and her husband Giovanni, who she’d met a year after emigrating to Italy, and married the previous spring. Naomi was pregnant again, and Katherine was of the age where she could just about understand that she was going to get a little baby brother or sister to play with, to which she was extremely excited. Oliver adored his daughter, and Elio wouldn’t have it any other way, it was utterly heart-warming to see.

Also gathered around the table were Oliver’s father, who’d made good on his promise to continue to support his son. This had had led to the almost inevitable; and he’d divorced Oliver’s mother in a fairly acrimonious settlement three years previously. He looked happy and relaxed here though, as he chatted to Whitney who was sitting on his right. Whitney had finished her medical degree the previous year, and had returned to Ireland to practice. Rory and her boyfriend, who she’d found in her final year at Colombia, were sitting at the end of the table, next to Vimini’s father and Chiara. Vimini’s father was a close friend of the family, and Annella and Samuel always invited him whenever they could. Alana took the seat between Chiara and Samuel, thus completing their gathering. Teddy and Zoe had also been invited, but it clashed with their long-awaited honeymoon, so they’d been unable to attend. He and Oliver had attended their wedding last year in the US, but they’d been unable to take their honeymoon until now due to work commitments.  It was a lot of people to feed, but Mafalda and his mother took it in their stride, producing dish after beautiful dish, paired with wines and other drinks. Naomi wasn’t drinking, naturally, and Mafalda almost mostly abstained in order to keep an eye on things.

As the afternoon faded into evening and the cicadas began to sing and the fireflies to dance, Mafalda produced what was quite possibly the most enormous cake that Elio had ever seen, covered with thirty candles. It was incredible. Oliver had trouble blowing out all the candles, causing Elio to make a joke about him being too manage that many in one breath. Oliver had taken that first piece of cake and pushed it into Elio’s mouth, a to stop him from talking, and b, just to have an excuse to get cream all over his face. Elio wondered what he had wished for.

Elio knew that it wasn’t possible to feel this happy forever, and that there would be other trials and tribulations thrown their way, but as he looked around at his friends and his family, he realised that it didn’t matter. Not as long as these people were here with him, to help and to stand by whenever things got rough. These were the best people he could ever hope to be around, and his heart was filled to bursting with love for every single one of them. He was sure that was partially the wine talking, but he decided he didn’t care.

Years later, when the memories of that wonderful day had faded somewhat, like a tapestry left too long in the sun, he would look at the photograph that his mother had taken at the end of the night, of them all so happy, and he would be reminded that no matter how difficult things could get, there could also be the brightest of lights; the highest of times with the right people, people who he loved. It didn’t matter if the floodwaters rose and threatened to sweep him away, because these people would be there to help, and to ensure that he could continue to swim, to fight the rising waters, and to follow the current to wherever he needed to be.  

End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, well there you have it. The end. 
> 
> I hope you have enjoyed reading this story as much as I've enjoyed writing it. I am truly grateful and blown away for all of the amazing comments and support I've received from you guys as I have written and published this story. I don't think I'd have enough characters in this notes box to list everybody who's helped me, or left me a lovely message, so suffice to say that I think you're all amazing, I love you, and without you I probably wouldn't have finished this story. It truly truly means the world to me when I see that little "message in inbox" sign; it really does. It's the only form of payment I get so... *tears well up. Thank you! 
> 
> If you're not quite ready to kiss goodbye to your Elio/Oliver ship, you can come and check out the beginning of my new story 'Above All Else' (click on my username and it'll take you to my works, and you should be able to find it there). I hope you'll join me for the adventures I plan to send the boys on in that story as well! 
> 
> With all my love, 
> 
> V  
> xx


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